Astrologers' Community  

Go Back   Astrologers' Community > Welcome! > Read My Chart

Read My Chart If you want to have your astrological chart read and do not post an astrological interpretation along with your chart request, your postings go here. No one is required to read any chart request and it is greatly appreciated if people who have chart requests acknowledge those who were kind enough to answer their request. If you want an astrological chart reading using the Vedic method (square astrological charts), your postings go in the Vedic Astrology forum."Read My Chart" type postings found in the rest of the forum will be moved here.


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Unread 11-21-2021, 01:38 AM
Marasca_Cherry Marasca_Cherry is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 146
I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put down.

No one has ever bothered to love me or care for me. Love is not an emotion Iíve felt from anybody, not partners, not parents, nobody. I have been bullied and put down my who life starting from my parents (my very first bullies), my sister, my friends, peers, my partners, my coworkers, my bosses. I have been criticized constantly to death by everybody. From my toes up to the way hairs on top of my head. No one has ever lent their hand out to me out of the goodness of their heart, to help me, they only ever wanted something in return like sex or control. I feel like my soul is dead.

Reply With Quote
  #2  
Unread 11-21-2021, 01:45 AM
Marasca_Cherry Marasca_Cherry is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 146
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Sorry, I forgot to attach my chart.
Attached Images
File Type: jpg 0001.jpg (57.3 KB, 38 views)
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Unread 11-21-2021, 02:45 AM
Kite's Avatar
Kite Kite is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Tied to a string theory
Posts: 782
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Mercury square Saturn suggests very negative thinking on your part which would continue to attract the circumstances you speak of. Pick up this book and start to reprogram your thinking to get out of the situations. You need to believe in yourself and love yourself to attract it from others.

https://www.amazon.com/Nature-Person...srpt=ABIS_BOOK
__________________
Simple ain't easy.
-----Thelonius Monk

Book a Reading
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Kite For This Useful Post:
Marasca_Cherry (11-21-2021)
  #4  
Unread 11-21-2021, 07:03 AM
katydid katydid is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 6,543
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

===============

Look at how you worded this statementóóďI have never been loved or cared forÖĒ

That is incorrectÖ.I am sorry, but that is not true. People have loved you and do love you.

What can you do to be able to recognise that love and caring and to be able to feel it and accept it and express it yourself? That is the question I see when I look at this chart.

Your chart is a Bowl pattern, with everything held within the rim of the Cancer/Capricorn axis, and all falling below the horizon. You keep things bottled up tight, bubbling below the surface, but held back and internalised.

Venus is how we express love and accept love and caring. Your Venus is exalted in Libra in the 4th. That is a good start and tells me you can learn to process those feelings and accept them at some point.

Your Venus does not make many aspects to your other planets. There is a minor aspect to Mars, a semi-sextile. So you can access those feelings of love through your Virgo Mars, óso by being of service to others, helping them and putting your energy into their needs. And also by connecting romantically.

But Venus is not making major aspects to your other planets and that puts a tremendous pressure upon your need for and feelings about love.

Here is an excerpt as an example:

When a planet is unaspected in a chart, it is a kind of unconscious pocket in the psyche. It is a drive or impulse which does not really relate to anything else in the personís life. Often he doesnít even know itís there, until it is triggered by a transit or progression or by something in someone elseís chart. It is though there is a god who has no ordinary outlet in the life of the individual, so that it cannot accommodate itself to external life in a gradual way. It remains primordial and unpolished, full of tremendous energy which has no outlet. It just sits there and builds up steam. An unaspected planet is very raw and archaic. It has no social graces, but behaves as though it has just been let out of prison. Often there is a kind of blank space, and the individual is sometimes very ignorant of that side of himself until it erupts.

An unaspected Venus which erupts may plunge the person into compulsive erotic or emotional states, but eventually these can be accommodated into the life. Liz Greene says, ďAn unaspected planet is likely to reflect a complex that is very far away from consciousness Ė at least initially. That is because it does not have any easy Ė natural routes for integration into consciousness, which is what aspects to the personal planets provide. When deeply unconscious points appear in the chart, they tend to have a very archaic and mythic quality when they are finally triggered.Ē In other words, the situation is believed to confer difficulty in expressing some of the planetís qualities. But these individuals do have a rather peculiar propensity for attracting partners who embody the unaspected planet.

https://theastrologyplacemembership....pected-planet/


So with an Unaspected Venus and a Bowl chart which is hidden below the horizon, I think it is hard for you to realise or understand that your ARE LOVED.

You are about to be hit by a powerful transit which may be an emotional breakthrough for you. Your Moon, the ruler of your chart, is conjunct Pluto in your 5th house of Love and Creativity.

Uranus is in Taurus, making an opposition to your Pluto. Soon it will be opposing your Moon as well. And transiting Saturn will be squaring your Moon/Pluto from the 8th of Intimacy, while this happens.

So these transits will be opening up your emotional body to feelings and epiphanies that you have ignored or been blind to previously.

So once again I want to say to youóyou are wrong when you say no one has ever loved you or cared for youÖ..that is not true. That is your own shortcomings and feelings of insecurity crying out and blocking out those whom do love you.

You say you have tried counselling but no one gets it. You need to keep trying. You need to reach out again and find someone who can help you connect to your Venus, to your own love language, to your own self expression, to your own heart.

It may take a spiritual healer or a shaman or a nutritionist or a pastor or a new lover or a family member that wants to make peace with youÖ.or a combination of the above.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to katydid For This Useful Post:
Marasca_Cherry (11-21-2021)
  #5  
Unread 11-21-2021, 07:41 AM
Marasca_Cherry Marasca_Cherry is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 146
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Quote:
Originally Posted by katydid View Post
===============

Look at how you worded this statementóóďI have never been loved or cared forÖĒ

That is incorrectÖ.I am sorry, but that is not true. People have loved you and do love you.

What can you do to be able to recognise that love and caring and to be able to feel it and accept it and express it yourself? That is the question I see when I look at this chart.

Your chart is a Bowl pattern, with everything held within the rim of the Cancer/Capricorn axis, and all falling below the horizon. You keep things bottled up tight, bubbling below the surface, but held back and internalised.

Venus is how we express love and accept love and caring. Your Venus is exalted in Libra in the 4th. That is a good start and tells me you can learn to process those feelings and accept them at some point.

Your Venus does not make many aspects to your other planets. There is a minor aspect to Mars, a semi-sextile. So you can access those feelings of love through your Virgo Mars, óso by being of service to others, helping them and putting your energy into their needs. And also by connecting romantically.

But Venus is not making major aspects to your other planets and that puts a tremendous pressure upon your need for and feelings about love.

Here is an excerpt as an example:

When a planet is unaspected in a chart, it is a kind of unconscious pocket in the psyche. It is a drive or impulse which does not really relate to anything else in the personís life. Often he doesnít even know itís there, until it is triggered by a transit or progression or by something in someone elseís chart. It is though there is a god who has no ordinary outlet in the life of the individual, so that it cannot accommodate itself to external life in a gradual way. It remains primordial and unpolished, full of tremendous energy which has no outlet. It just sits there and builds up steam. An unaspected planet is very raw and archaic. It has no social graces, but behaves as though it has just been let out of prison. Often there is a kind of blank space, and the individual is sometimes very ignorant of that side of himself until it erupts.

An unaspected Venus which erupts may plunge the person into compulsive erotic or emotional states, but eventually these can be accommodated into the life. Liz Greene says, ďAn unaspected planet is likely to reflect a complex that is very far away from consciousness Ė at least initially. That is because it does not have any easy Ė natural routes for integration into consciousness, which is what aspects to the personal planets provide. When deeply unconscious points appear in the chart, they tend to have a very archaic and mythic quality when they are finally triggered.Ē In other words, the situation is believed to confer difficulty in expressing some of the planetís qualities. But these individuals do have a rather peculiar propensity for attracting partners who embody the unaspected planet.

https://theastrologyplacemembership....pected-planet/


So with an Unaspected Venus and a Bowl chart which is hidden below the horizon, I think it is hard for you to realise or understand that your ARE LOVED.

You are about to be hit by a powerful transit which may be an emotional breakthrough for you. Your Moon, the ruler of your chart, is conjunct Pluto in your 5th house of Love and Creativity.

Uranus is in Taurus, making an opposition to your Pluto. Soon it will be opposing your Moon as well. And transiting Saturn will be squaring your Moon/Pluto from the 8th of Intimacy, while this happens.

So these transits will be opening up your emotional body to feelings and epiphanies that you have ignored or been blind to previously.

So once again I want to say to youóyou are wrong when you say no one has ever loved you or cared for youÖ..that is not true. That is your own shortcomings and feelings of insecurity crying out and blocking out those whom do love you.

You say you have tried counselling but no one gets it. You need to keep trying. You need to reach out again and find someone who can help you connect to your Venus, to your own love language, to your own self expression, to your own heart.

It may take a spiritual healer or a shaman or a nutritionist or a pastor or a new lover or a family member that wants to make peace with youÖ.or a combination of the above.
I hope you're right. I just have been reliving my past relationships with literally everyone in my head lately and I feel so hurt and abused. You said I can access my Venus by being of service to others, helping them and putting your energy into their needs. And also by connecting romantically. But every time I try this I am hurt and rejected by others. How many times can I try and get burned?
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Unread 11-21-2021, 05:54 PM
katydid katydid is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 6,543
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

I am sorry that you are experiencing such pain. We need to get to the bottom of it.

But I don't believe the Universe is against you and everyone hates and abuses you. I think there are things that you are not seeing nor taking into account.

Can you go to therapy with someone to try and get objective nonbiased feedback? Maybe you and your sister could go to a therapy session and you could get some feedback about what is happening and WHY others feel the way they do.

WHY do they reject their relationships with you? What precedes it? If you are doing something or behaving in a way that frustrates them, wouldn't you like to understand it, and maybe alter your responses?

I know you said that your sister is mean to you and makes you cry---but let's figure out the true reasons for her behaviour.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Unread 11-21-2021, 07:06 PM
waybread's Avatar
waybread waybread is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: A class M planet near you
Posts: 17,856
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Chiron on your ascendant opposed by Saturn can have this effect where "it hurts to be you."

I agree with Katydid, that if you can get into therapy with a clinical psychologist, you might find it beneficial, because the kinds of wounds you describe go back to your early childhood. A child has no way of processing its emotional hurts, and this can carry into adulthood.

Venus is very strong in your chart, in Libra, the sign it rules. You have artistic talent and if you can convert your pain into writing, music, painting, or something similar, I think you can feel some release.

Your sun conjuncts Mars, and Mars is the traditional ruler of your Scorpio moon and Pluto. Mars also rules athletes and sports, so if you can do something by way of working on your physical fitness, even if it's just walking around your neighborhood, you should benefit.

Saturn is also strong in your chart, in Capricorn, the sign it rules. Saturn teaches self-discipline and patience. "Baby steps" may not seem like much of a solution to your real needs for human connections, but the universe notices when you take them.

Saturn also rules old people, so perhaps you can volunteer at a nursing home, or spend time with an elderly relative. Many seniors are elderly shut-ins, and they would welcome a visit. If you have the emotional stamina for it, think also about volunteering to do hospice work (moon-Pluto in Scorpio.)

Here is a big virtual hug headed your way.
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And weíll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to waybread For This Useful Post:
Marasca_Cherry (11-22-2021)
  #8  
Unread 11-22-2021, 01:55 AM
Marasca_Cherry Marasca_Cherry is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 146
Quote:
Originally Posted by katydid View Post
I am sorry that you are experiencing such pain. We need to get to the bottom of it.

But I don't believe the Universe is against you and everyone hates and abuses you. I think there are things that you are not seeing nor taking into account.

Can you go to therapy with someone to try and get objective nonbiased feedback? Maybe you and your sister could go to a therapy session and you could get some feedback about what is happening and WHY others feel the way they do.

WHY do they reject their relationships with you? What precedes it? If you are doing something or behaving in a way that frustrates them, wouldn't you like to understand it, and maybe alter your responses?

I know you said that your sister is mean to you and makes you cry---but let's figure out the true reasons for her behaviour.
I can try seeing a therapist again I just know there going to try to tell me things to make me feel better but I know reality, I know my experiences, and people just donít care. Iíve never been loved the way I need to be loved, itís all about sex or control. People do want to hurt me and put me down, itís my experience. I can love myself all day and be confident as much as I want but at the end Iím still alone.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Marasca_Cherry For This Useful Post:
katydid (11-23-2021)
  #9  
Unread 11-22-2021, 02:10 AM
Marasca_Cherry Marasca_Cherry is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 146
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Quote:
Originally Posted by waybread View Post
Chiron on your ascendant opposed by Saturn can have this effect where "it hurts to be you."

I agree with Katydid, that if you can get into therapy with a clinical psychologist, you might find it beneficial, because the kinds of wounds you describe go back to your early childhood. A child has no way of processing its emotional hurts, and this can carry into adulthood.

Venus is very strong in your chart, in Libra, the sign it rules. You have artistic talent and if you can convert your pain into writing, music, painting, or something similar, I think you can feel some release.

Your sun conjuncts Mars, and Mars is the traditional ruler of your Scorpio moon and Pluto. Mars also rules athletes and sports, so if you can do something by way of working on your physical fitness, even if it's just walking around your neighborhood, you should benefit.

Saturn is also strong in your chart, in Capricorn, the sign it rules. Saturn teaches self-discipline and patience. "Baby steps" may not seem like much of a solution to your real needs for human connections, but the universe notices when you take them.

Saturn also rules old people, so perhaps you can volunteer at a nursing home, or spend time with an elderly relative. Many seniors are elderly shut-ins, and they would welcome a visit. If you have the emotional stamina for it, think also about volunteering to do hospice work (moon-Pluto in Scorpio.)

Here is a big virtual hug headed your way.
Thanks maybe the universe is calling me to something creative because every time I try to do anything practical I suffer. Every time I do anything with other people I get bullied. I understand why some of those elderly are shut-ins, they know better. In a perfect world maybe I would work in hospice and do very well but I don't need to be around people who just want to hurt or put me down (co-workers/managers).
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Unread 11-22-2021, 03:01 AM
waybread's Avatar
waybread waybread is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: A class M planet near you
Posts: 17,856
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

I suggest you stop pre-judging other people. You may actually be creating the type of interactions you say you don't want. It's called a self[fulfilling prophesy.

https://www.britannica.com/topic/sel...lling-prophecy

Living requires risk taking. It requires staying open to our hurts, and not blaming other people or trying to ignore them.

With all good wishes for your journey towards wholeness, W.
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And weíll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Unread 11-22-2021, 03:31 AM
wan wan is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,995
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Could be caused by that Chiron right on your ascendant.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to wan For This Useful Post:
waybread (11-22-2021)
  #12  
Unread 11-23-2021, 01:05 AM
katydid katydid is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 6,543
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marasca_Cherry View Post
I can try seeing a therapist again I just know there going to try to tell me things to make me feel better but I know reality, I know my experiences, and people just don’t care. I’ve never been loved the way I need to be loved, it’s all about sex or control. People do want to hurt me and put me down, it’s my experience. I can love myself all day and be confident as much as I want but at the end I’m still alone.
Marasca,
Relations are a two way street. Your Bowl Chart allows you to hold everything in---and it may make you more sensitive and fragile than many others are. You may tend to hold onto past hurts and may also respond to harsh words or even just short comments or constructive criticisms, as if they are cruel taunts.

You have Cancer rising, with your Moon in Scorpio alongside Pluto. You are a tough nut to crack.

I feel it is important for you to work on yourself and your reactions to what others say or do. You may find that you are over reacting or seeing or hearing things in a different way than they were intending you to accept them.

Could there be any truth to that?

Your Chiron placement could make you a great healer or counsellor yourself as you are very empathetic and compassionate. But first you have to empower yourself, fortify yourself, protect yourself FROM YOURSELF...

I think you might have shut down somewhat and just take everything in as if it is a negative comment or an assault on you in some way, perhaps?

You are saying to me " It's MY experience that people want to hurt me and put me down' and you want me to be clear on that.

But is there room for error on your part perhaps?

Could you be feeling that way partly because of your Chiron on the Ascendant, which colours all of your one on one interactions with others?

Is there a reason some coworkers or managers or family members criticise you? Could there be room for criticism at times?



I am not trying to take away your experience of being bullied or put down. I hear you and sympathise with you. I am however, trying to help you move past that experience into some pro-active responses that could help you move towards the happiness you are looking for.

Last edited by katydid; 11-23-2021 at 01:11 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Unread 11-23-2021, 03:01 AM
waybread's Avatar
waybread waybread is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: A class M planet near you
Posts: 17,856
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

It is also possible simply to be happy being alone. Some people prefer to be alone.

The older I get, the more I believe that happiness is a choice.

[Of course, excusing people diagnosed with clinical depression, &c.]

Please read up on the self-fulfilling prophecy.
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And weíll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Unread 11-23-2021, 05:07 AM
zipadee zipadee is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 78
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

I'm so sorry to hear that you feel that way, was reading this thread the other day about Chiron conjunct the Ascendant, might help explain some of the feelings.

https://www.reddit.com/r/astrology/c...ndant_natives/
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Unread 11-24-2021, 01:10 AM
Marasca_Cherry Marasca_Cherry is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 146
Quote:
Originally Posted by katydid View Post
Marasca,
Relations are a two way street. Your Bowl Chart allows you to hold everything in---and it may make you more sensitive and fragile than many others are. You may tend to hold onto past hurts and may also respond to harsh words or even just short comments or constructive criticisms, as if they are cruel taunts.

You have Cancer rising, with your Moon in Scorpio alongside Pluto. You are a tough nut to crack.

I feel it is important for you to work on yourself and your reactions to what others say or do. You may find that you are over reacting or seeing or hearing things in a different way than they were intending you to accept them.

Could there be any truth to that?

Your Chiron placement could make you a great healer or counsellor yourself as you are very empathetic and compassionate. But first you have to empower yourself, fortify yourself, protect yourself FROM YOURSELF...

I think you might have shut down somewhat and just take everything in as if it is a negative comment or an assault on you in some way, perhaps?

You are saying to me " It's MY experience that people want to hurt me and put me down' and you want me to be clear on that.

But is there room for error on your part perhaps?

Could you be feeling that way partly because of your Chiron on the Ascendant, which colours all of your one on one interactions with others?

Is there a reason some coworkers or managers or family members criticise you? Could there be room for criticism at times?



I am not trying to take away your experience of being bullied or put down. I hear you and sympathise with you. I am however, trying to help you move past that experience into some pro-active responses that could help you move towards the happiness you are looking for.
I get what your saying but this is not in my head and Iím not doing anything to invite this behavior from others, I am not a rude person and I do my best. I would never talk to people the way I have been talked to. If you havenít experienced it yourself you wouldnít understand. Even a coworker in the past commented on how weird it was people always come after me right after the millionth unhinged member of the general public chewed me out. My coworker was confused because I had done nothing wrong, everybody gets it working with the public but I got it the most. People act intense and controlling around me all the time, I have been a punching bag my whole life and no itís not constructive criticism, Iím aware of the difference and I know when something is coming from a good place. I know what your saying from but from my experience people behave closer to apes more than anyone wants to admit and something about me triggers a cruelty in people. Iím burnt out, and just trying to figure out why. You might be the type of person that believes people are inherently good, but thatís not my experience and itís not because itís all in my head, thereís something about me that makes people angry, if you donít have that then you would know what Iím trying to say. Itís not normal for someone to always be targeted from day one of meeting any one of these bullies, what did I do from the very first day to warrant this behavior? They donít even know me. This is why Iím looking at astrology because yeah I get from all angles, my family, friends, work, but also people who have talked to me for only 5 minutes.

Last edited by Marasca_Cherry; 11-24-2021 at 01:14 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Unread 11-24-2021, 01:26 AM
chay chay is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: Jun 2021
Posts: 1,491
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marasca_Cherry View Post
I get what your saying but this is not in my head and Iím not doing anything to invite this behavior from others, I am not a rude person and I do my best. I would never talk to people the way I have been talked to. If you havenít experienced it yourself you wouldnít understand. Even a coworker in the past commented on how weird it was people always come after me right after the millionth unhinged member of the general public chewed me out. My coworker was confused because I had done nothing wrong, everybody gets it working with the public but I got it the most. People act intense and controlling around me all the time, I have been a punching bag my whole life and no itís not constructive criticism, Iím aware of the difference and I know when something is coming from a good place. I know what your saying from but from my experience people behave closer to apes more than anyone wants to admit and something about me triggers a cruelty in people. Iím burnt out, and just trying to figure out why. You might be the type of person that believes people are inherently good, but thatís not my experience and itís not because itís all in my head, thereís something about me that makes people angry, if you donít have that then you would know what Iím trying to say. Itís not normal for someone to always be targeted from day one of meeting any one of these bullies, what did I do from the very first day to warrant this behavior? They donít even know me. This is why Iím looking at astrology because yeah I get from all angles, my family, friends, work, but also people who have talked to me for only 5 minutes.
There are lots of really awful people around. It's hard to change your thinking, but you need to keep reminding yourself that if someone is horrible, it's because THEY are horrible....not because something about you made them do it.
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Unread 11-24-2021, 04:17 AM
waybread's Avatar
waybread waybread is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: A class M planet near you
Posts: 17,856
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Marasca Cherry--

You've done very well to be on this thread for a few days-- and we're still here. You haven't driven us off.

A big difference is that we aren't engaging in a visual way.

Possibly without meaning to, you give off negative visual impressions to other people. For example, with Chiron on your ascendant, you might give off a victim type of personality. If you expect everyone to be hostile towards you, you might inadvertently act in ways that draw out hostile behavior (the self-fulfilling prophecy.) or possibly you actually fear interacting with others, which can draw out the (metaphorical) sharks who smell blood in the water.

It occurs to me that there are other names for the experiences you describe: ostracism, for one. http://psychology.iresearchnet.com/s...ips/ostracism/

Social exclusion: http://psychology.iresearchnet.com/s...ial-exclusion/

Are you able to video-record yourself in the privacy of your home: for example, speaking in front of the mirror as though you were conversing with another person, so that you can see how you interact with other people? If you're not happy with the self you see in the video, you can start coaching yourself on developing a demeanor you like better.

Saturn on your 7th house cusp can come across as the critic. Some personal growth will come from recognizing that you are your own worst critic. Saturn also rules self-discipline and patience.
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And weíll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Unread 11-26-2021, 12:32 AM
Marasca_Cherry Marasca_Cherry is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 146
Quote:
Originally Posted by waybread View Post
Marasca Cherry--

You've done very well to be on this thread for a few days-- and we're still here. You haven't driven us off.

A big difference is that we aren't engaging in a visual way.

Possibly without meaning to, you give off negative visual impressions to other people. For example, with Chiron on your ascendant, you might give off a victim type of personality. If you expect everyone to be hostile towards you, you might inadvertently act in ways that draw out hostile behavior (the self-fulfilling prophecy.) or possibly you actually fear interacting with others, which can draw out the (metaphorical) sharks who smell blood in the water.

It occurs to me that there are other names for the experiences you describe: ostracism, for one. http://psychology.iresearchnet.com/s...ips/ostracism/

Social exclusion: http://psychology.iresearchnet.com/s...ial-exclusion/

Are you able to video-record yourself in the privacy of your home: for example, speaking in front of the mirror as though you were conversing with another person, so that you can see how you interact with other people? If you're not happy with the self you see in the video, you can start coaching yourself on developing a demeanor you like better.

Saturn on your 7th house cusp can come across as the critic. Some personal growth will come from recognizing that you are your own worst critic. Saturn also rules self-discipline and patience.
Iím not sure if I do anything in particularly wrong. I might seem tired, aloof, and depressed but thatís because I am and I have chronic fatigue and other possible issues under investigation. Iím just trying to get by at this point and mind my business but people seem to feel entitled towards me, to make me feel low. Does it make sense to go after a depressed person? Would you do it? Or would you leave them alone? Maybe humans have this innate desire to go after the weak ones in the herd. I donít think Iím a victim and I donít go around victimizing others. When I meet someone new maybe I have a fear they will be the same way due to my past experiences but I try not to show that and I try to put my best foot forward. Doesnít work though. I donít really care to be around others as this point but I still have to live in a society, Iím just asking not to be bothered or harassed at this point.
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Unread 11-27-2021, 01:20 AM
waybread's Avatar
waybread waybread is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: A class M planet near you
Posts: 17,856
Re: I have never been loved or cared for by anybody, only been criticized and put dow

Fair enough.

But I do recommend that you video-record yourself-- even if just for a moment on your cell phone. Imagine that you are greeting a new person, for example. It can be very revealing to view yourself from the "outside. (I found it so.)

I have poor posture. I've had it all my life. It never felt natural to me to stand up completely straight. Nevertheless, periodically I encounter people-- including complete strangers-- who scold me for not straightening up. They're definitely out there.

"Tired, aloof, and depressed," could just bring out the worst in people who think it's their duty to fix other people.

I hope you can realize that your natal Chiron conjunct ascendant opposite Saturn is a real "It hurts to be you" aspect. It's a zodiacal strike against you. But hopefully you can see whatever you've achieved in life as a triumph.

Are you actually happier being alone?

I just had tea this morning with a friend who is super-social around others. But she lives alone--by preference. She just prefers her own autonomy. Do you actually prefer to live alone, without having to constantly adjust yourself to another person?
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And weíll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
cared, criticized, loved

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump



All times are GMT. The time now is 01:01 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2022, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 2005-2018, AstrologyWeekly.com. Boards' structure and all posts are property of AstrologyWeekly.com and their respective creators. No part of the messages sent on these boards may be copied without their owners' explicit consent.