Feeling scared and depressed, need some guidance post-breakup

lilithofeden

lilithofeden

Well-known member
Needless to say, I broke up with my boyfriend a few days ago (Feb 26th, when the sun was conjunct my DC and we had a full moon in Virgo, conjunct my AC). He moved in with me 2.5 years ago, and he's still living in my house right now until he can find an apartment.

Thing is, I'm in college and now became a single mom. I'm scared, dealing with depression (taking medication and seeing a psychologist which is not cheap.. I've reduced our sessions to bi-weekly instead of weekly for cost-savings). Now I have to take on all the finances myself. I was a single mom for 5 years before and I made it work, but I wasn't in school. Luckily I am on my co-op work term and they hired me part-time during the semesters I'm full-time at school, so I have some income to rely on (plus student loans).

Anyway, I am still saddened by my decision and find it hard to focus on doing daily tasks and just feel numb and have a heavy-heart feeling, but I do think my decision is for the best. It's just a tough pill to swallow.

Could someone please let me know what they see in my upcoming transits? My future feels so uncertain right now as I'm starting this new chapter in my life.

Thank you!
 

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IleneK

IleneK

Premium Member
I think the decision was an important one in your life; a prelude to truly stepping into maturity as symbolized by your very soon to come Saturn return. And I want to know that feeling scared or depressed is difficult for sure, but it is appropriate for this powerful transitional time in your life, and nothing to be afraid of. Just feel scared and depressed, let it pass through you as it surely will. In fact, the more you allow yourself to experience these true feelings, the sooner they will dissipate.
It sounds like you are living your life as Saturn might ask of you, going to school full time and working, attending to your personal work in therapy, especially with natal Saturn in your 6th house trining natal Moon. Well done!

Saturn wants to build foundations and stability, but it often does so by blocking or taking away things that are no longer useful or practical. So it is also appropriate that you feel uncertainty. As with your fear or depression; it is okay to just feel uncertain. See what that feels like; let it be present and observe your inner response to it.

But don't take any action; don't try to drive it away. That will only make it rise up stronger. Just keep letting the uncertainty flow through you, and eventually will flow through and just go back to where ever it came from.

So I want to encourage you: just meet each thing as it comes up, put one foot in front of the other. You will figure each thing out that way, for better or worse. And then you will go on to the next. And you will grow and learn. The Saturn return offers that opportunity to those who seek it.
 
leomoon

leomoon

Well-known member
Having Venus in Sagittarius, as I do too; suggests you will always be looking for love, but sometimes in the wrong places as the song suggests.


Pisces on the MC (others) may suggest more then one marriage, and being starry eyed in the search for the right guy. I think my suggestion that this is so, is seen by your 5th house of "recreation, children & love affairs, (the non-committed variety) having Uranus-Neptune here. Uranus is estrangement imo, and Neptune the starry eyes, miscalculations.



You may want to be more opened to earth signs like Virgo and Capricorn, as you have Virgo Rising and may be able to identify more with them depending of course on the entire chart IF they are more sincere and down to earth even if you'd think a bit stodgy.


Don't fret, you'll make it, you are a determined Scorpio. What is great about the transits is they move on.


Best of luck to you for your future.
 
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lilithofeden

lilithofeden

Well-known member
IleneK said:
I think the decision was an important one in your life; a prelude to truly stepping into maturity as symbolized by your very soon to come Saturn return. And I want to know that feeling scared or depressed is difficult for sure, but it is appropriate for this powerful transitional time in your life, and nothing to be afraid of. Just feel scared and depressed, let it pass through you as it surely will. In fact, the more you allow yourself to experience these true feelings, the sooner they will dissipate.
It sounds like you are living your life as Saturn might ask of you, going to school full time and working, attending to your personal work in therapy, especially with natal Saturn in your 6th house trining natal Moon. Well done!

Saturn wants to build foundations and stability, but it often does so by blocking or taking away things that are no longer useful or practical. So it is also appropriate that you feel uncertainty. As with your fear or depression; it is okay to just feel uncertain. See what that feels like; let it be present and observe your inner response to it.

But don't take any action; don't try to drive it away. That will only make it rise up stronger. Just keep letting the uncertainty flow through you, and eventually will flow through and just go back to where ever it came from.

So I want to encourage you: just meet each thing as it comes up, put one foot in front of the other. You will figure each thing out that way, for better or worse. And then you will go on to the next. And you will grow and learn. The Saturn return offers that opportunity to those who seek it.
Click to expand...

Thank you, this really resonated with me. :smile:
 
lilithofeden

lilithofeden

Well-known member
leomoon said:
Having Venus in Sagittarius, as I do too; suggests you will always be looking for love, but sometimes in the wrong places as the song suggests.
Click to expand...

I tend to attract a lot of saggi's in my life actually.. my Dad is one, my son is one, my son's ex is one, I had two best friends in high school who were all saggi's. I like adventure and foreign culture... I have always told myself I wanted an exotic European last name (my last name is very European, and I couldn't imagine changing it to something like "Smith" for example). I told my friend just the other day I feel like my future husband is a cute guy living somewhere in Europe :lol: :wink:


leomoon said:
Pisces on the MC (others) may suggest more then one marriage, and being starry eyed in the search for the right guy. I think my suggestion that this is so, is seen by your 5th house of "recreation, children & love affairs, (the non-committed variety) having Uranus-Neptune here. Uranus is estrangement imo, and Neptune the starry eyes, miscalculations.
Click to expand...

I think Pisces on my DC may be more the reason why I search for love in all the wrong places... I desire a deep, ethereal connection in my intimate relationships, and the one I just ended felt superficial... it was almost torturous. With Neptune thrown in that house, I felt like I lost a lot of myself in the relationship, giving way to accommodate him and really feeling a lack of respect for my boundaries, and all because I let it happen. So I know I need to be more assertive with my boundaries.


leomoon said:
You may want to be more opened to earth signs like Virgo and Capricorn, as you have Virgo Rising and may be able to identify more with them depending of course on the entire chart IF they are more sincere and down to earth even if you'd think a bit stodgy.
Click to expand...

Yes, this is a good point. I have often thought that maybe an Earth sign would be good for me.. I've attracted a lot of Cancer's and Saggi's, but none of them ended well. Perhaps a Capi would (my best friend of nearly 20 years is a Capi).


leomoon said:
Don't fret, you'll make it, you are a determined Scorpio. What is great about the transits is they move on.


Best of luck to you for your future.
Click to expand...

Thank you :smile:
 
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