Re: will it ever get better for me? ever? how to confront past life karmic debts
The psychologist/psychiatrist thing fits well with your chart and the 8th/12th houses- oh btw Mars is not passive in Aquarius!
I have Mars Mercury conjunct too, it might make you quite intense minded. The 12th is the bigger issue there though I think.
You have a fascinating chart, very intense and therefore quite hard to analyze concisely.
So many 12th/8th house planets, and the North node is not merely in Scorpio, more significantly it's in the 8th, but also enhanced by the sign.
And then there is Jupiter and Pluto in there too. Growth and transformation through sex, mysticism, hidden subjects, death and rebirth.
Karmic destiny and evolution too follows these themes with the north node.
Your chart has no fire in it, which is intriguing, so maybe it feels harder to get away from fate with self assertion.
Virtually everything is in the southern hemisphere(that's the top, I know that seems illogical) suggesting quite a heavy imbalance in the fact your are primarily(maybe exclusively?) focused objectively on external events.
The Chiron in the 6th on it's own in Virgo, again natural sign for the house, so it could become a key focal point of counterbalance,
as in typical 'bucket' charts- it means a wound and pain concerning your health and daily routines and service, but also a potential healing gift and higher wisdom emerging.
Chiron the healer has a natural affinity with Virgo according to what I've read.
This goes along with the sign/house correspondence and the Pluto Scorpio in the 8th, in making certain astrological traits almost exaggerated or somehow quintessential in your chart.
A heavily emotional person is also suggested with the strong water emphasis by house and sign.
With the Sagittarius MC and Pisces Ascendant, both Jupiter ruled(If you take the modern ruler of Pisces along with Neptune, a strong spiritual
component is present. Jupiter is in the 8th so Career/public face and approach to life, affects the intense affairs of the 8th.
There is also the 8th house of sex death, rebirth serving the 12th of spirituality, self undoing, illusions, the subconscious through ruler Mars.
Through ruler Pluto in the 8th it makes the 8th an end in itself. The 12th rulers are in the 11th and 12th, meaning that 12th house issues
are an end in themselves but also affect your dreams and aspirations.
There are different manifestations of these houses energies, and I don't wish to alarm you, but all the most intense and darkest events and life charts seem to me to have strong 8th house, and second to that I'd say 12th house connections.
It doesn't have to be death, but it could be fears, transformation, secrets, hidden topics and issues, danger, sex, power, mysticism all those things.
I don't know how into astrology you are but these houses are worth studying.
I just ran the part of fortune and you also have that in the 8th house in Scorpio, emphasizing your chart theme.
All the 12th house planets are relevant, but focusing in Saturn, this suggests compulsions, hard lessons, and ordeals.
Maybe addictions, escapism, illusions, subconscious mental problems, maybe a lot of recuperation and learning from adversity needed?
A lot of secret issues? You may hide ordeals from others or yourself. Pisces is in it's home house of 12 again emphasizing these traits.
The Aquarius and (especially Saturn)in Pisces in the 12th suggests difference of the mind and sensitivity being painful, do you feel
privately weakened because of difference and sensitivity?
The 8th house is more a conscious direction apparently, whereas the 12th more beyond your control and subconscious.
Outer planets to your natal planets through the 12th could well feel like forces beyond your control digging up pain and/or secrets, or illusions.
There have been heavy transits of outer planets through the 12th in your life and crossing the ascendant, so this is why you would not feel in anyway light-hearted.
I think you would be much stronger for having gone through them though.
Neptune and Chiron are still in there in the 12th just I think although if you check an ephemeris, should be out soon.
Pluto, going through the 11th now will be the 12th until you are a lot older.
So a transformative life, non boring life is suggested. Involving spirituality, transformation, and deep emotional and transcendental and transpersonal issues. (again enhanced by hemisphere emphasis)
The pressure is eased as more planets move away from your Ascendant. Just accept Pluto will be there still.
You might want to look at vertex/anti-vertex too, key fated points(from my experience very sensitive to transit) and look out for nodal
(and also Saturn etc) transits to either polarity, plus the 8th and 12th houses.
Sorry if this isn't so insightful, I find your chart a little too intense in a way, so it's quite has been to get a clear enough picture, and the 8th and 12th are quite enigmatic by nature to articulate and decipher.
Very intriguing stuff, you don't see many charts like that.
