People just DO NOT like me

I am curious what chart would be helpful to get some insights as why my work life has been causing me so much difficultly. On one hand I know I am probably just not a fit for the organization, but on the other if there is something I not seeing about my personality or something I need to work through, same **** follows me to my next job. I need to shake this
This job is killing me slowly in terms of people dynamics. Forty + hours is a lot of time to spend in an environment where one feels unwelcomed. It takes everything I have to walk through the door on most days.
Some of the dynamics I would say daily I am the recipient of
* subtle to blatant passive aggressive remarks.
* aggressive behavior
* constant criticisms of Americans. Ok they have their issues, but at some point get to know the person. America is HUGE
* not listened/heard - it is like I am not speaking - or misunderstood. really struggle getting my point across
* My boss is constantly twisting my words
* After two years people still don't know what I do. ?? WTF! I didn't hire myself!

The result of this is feeling beat up every **** day as well as starting to be suspicious and not knowing who I can trust. It's exhausting. Anyway, I am curious to what chart would be helpful. Would it be natal - would it be a current state with the city where I live. Any input would be helpful
In some ways I don't get it. I am not the most socially comfortable and certainly have NEVER been good at navigating the politics of work; however, I am Libra I am not that difficult of a person to be around. These constant "smack downs" as I call them are going to cause me to implode or explode one day!

Would really appreciate some insight.

Where is it - your chart?

Sunny said:

Where is it - your chart?

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Hi
I didn't post one yet as wasn't sure the best chart to post.
"Anyway, I am curious to what chart would be helpful. Would it be natal - would it be a current state with the city where I live. Any input would be helpful"




I will post my natal with current transits though. THank you.

Sunny said:

Where is it - your chart?

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Sunny, do you have a YouTube channel?

Amsterdam, I missed that. If they're prejudiced against the U.S., especially with the current Administration and its rudeness, they may be using you as their scapegoat. I'm not seeing anything in your Chart suggesting that you're deliberately antisocial.

Well, Sun Square Ascendant does seem like the real problem, especially with Mars in Sagittarius. You're well intentioned, but impatient with others, and your goals are more important to you than "going along to get along".

david starling said:

Well, Sun Square Ascendant does seem like the real problem, especially with Mars in Sagittarius. You're well intentioned, but impatient with others, and your goals are more important to you than "going along to get along".

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It may be an American thing. I was sharing this with someone in my field who said the same thing as you, but rather the whole ask of my job is designed to fail this using me as the scapegoat for that failure. I do know I struggle with being a bit more direct and business focused. I’m not good at the social skill of building relationships and I’m definitely more introverted and I suck at small talk; however I made to it 50 and have never been on the receiving end of such “anger” before. Sure a few ups and downs in the working world, but always found a few to align with, but this a first where I’m truly on my own. I’m sure I own my part in this, BUT no matter my efforts it remains the same. I have withdrawn in a shell. Professional cordial, but try to avoid the barbs.

CLx2-- I note that Pluto is squaring your sun just now. This is one very difficult transit. Libra suns want to get along with others, by and large. Pluto in a hard aspect to the sun seemingly draws out of the woodwork people who are into negative power dynamics and even bullying. Wanting to withdraw into a shell is also characteristic of this transit. (The Roman god Pluto ruled the underworld and isolation from the light of day.)

Being an American in anti-Trump Europe may accentuate the nature of the transiting square.

This too shall pass, but the best way to handle it is to really look at your own Plutonian nature, and be willing to develop its call for self (sun) transformation. You may find that whatever you thought about your identity (sun) is no longer sustainable.

I note your natal Mars square Pluto-Uranus. This is a pretty volatile combination. Do you have temper flare-ups occasionally?

I don't know what kind of workplace you're in, but if you're hired overseas at age 50, you probably are part of the international talent pool in your company.

I had something similar happen when I first moved from the US to Canada, incidentally. I know what it's like on those days when it takes all your willpower just to go to work.

I think there's a lot of helpful info on line. What you describe sounds like workplace mobbing.

https://psychcentral.com/blog/bullying-at-work-workplace-mobbing-is-on-the-rise/

https://toughnickel.com/business/Is-Workplace-Mobbing-on-the-Rise

Your company and your personal style may not be open to this, but if it were me, I would probably make a closed-door appointment with my supervisor. Plan ahead as to the 2-3 key points you wish to convey about your situation, and put down talking points on a printed memo to share. Practice staying calm. Explain that you hope to do your best work to further your supervisor's and the company's goals, but that the workplace environment seems sub-professional and disruptive of the company's goals.

If there is a human resources department in your company they may be helpful in arranging a mediated discussion between you and your main tormentor. [I once was driven to this point. At first he agreed, then later declined the meeting. However, his behaviour shaped up a lot after I took this step.]

Your mileage may vary, but you get the idea of moving past your current situation through some constructive, non-aggressive steps.

Meanwhile, you want a good letter of reference from your current employer, in case you decide to move on.

BTW, do you have points of contact with your co-workers that are not work-related? I dunno, talking about World Cup soccer or explaining over a beer why a lot of Americans dislike Donald Trump and his policies?

Good luck on this. It isn't easy.

"CLx2-- I note that Pluto is squaring your sun just now. This is one very difficult transit. Libra suns want to get along with others, by and large. Pluto in a hard aspect to the sun seemingly draws out of the woodwork people who are into negative power dynamics and even bullying. Wanting to withdraw into a shell is also characteristic of this transit. (The Roman god Pluto ruled the underworld and isolation from the light of day.)"

Thank you for this. MOst helpful. I will spend sometime researching my Pluto. I was wondering if I had particularly hard transit going on now. There is a dynamic in this workforce I have NEVER experienced. There is an odd dysfunction playing out. I've tried talking to my supervisor, but don't get far. I know he doesn't agree with the behavior going on, but he won't do anything either unless the behavior is directed at him personally. We are very opposite in personality. He is very much the go along to get along- he is all about the relationship. Also a Libra funny enough and definitely embodies "everybody likes him" He is British and definitely had an issue with my being an American and was one of the worst at taking digs at me for being an American. We moved past that - FINALLY. He very much takes the approach do what you have to so people like you. I feel like I am in abusive relationship as most of the conversations are around how to modify behavior so people like you. I am on the receiving end of unprofessional and inappropriate behavior and I have to change!? I've taken one level up and have been challenged to have the courage to say something to those who are disrespectful and have also been told that I need to earn my stripes in the organization and it is my job to get people to respect me and to convince them my work is important. I don't want to go into the details of my work, but again, I didn't hire myself. Had I known my responsibility was to convince people what I was hired to do was important for the organization, I would NEVER have taken the job. I am not the right person to do that. I am solid implementer and can get things done, but I am not the sales person. Different skill set than I possess. I say again, I may not be super social or the popular one, but I am not an ******* and I am always professional and I treat people with respect and kindness even though I should start behaving like an *******. It is an odd odd work environment. It is a humanitarian organization, which shocks me how people treat one another. Anyway, I tend to wax on as I am in the thick of it, but thank you so much for the insight.

"CLx2-- I note that Pluto is squaring your sun just now. This is one very difficult transit. Libra suns want to get along with others, by and large. Pluto in a hard aspect to the sun seemingly draws out of the woodwork people who are into negative power dynamics and even bullying. Wanting to withdraw into a shell is also characteristic of this transit. (The Roman god Pluto ruled the underworld and isolation from the light of day.)"

Thank you for this. MOst helpful. I will spend sometime researching my Pluto. I was wondering if I had particularly hard transit going on now. There is a dynamic in this workforce I have NEVER experienced. There is an odd dysfunction playing out. I've tried talking to my supervisor, but don't get far. I know he doesn't agree with the behavior going on, but he won't do anything either unless the behavior is directed at him personally. We are very opposite in personality. He is very much the go along to get along- he is all about the relationship. Also a Libra funny enough and definitely embodies "everybody likes him" He is British and definitely had an issue with my being an American and was one of the worst at taking digs at me for being an American. We moved past that - FINALLY. He very much takes the approach do what you have to so people like you. I feel like I am in abusive relationship as most of the conversations are around how to modify behavior so people like you. I am on the receiving end of unprofessional and inappropriate behavior and I have to change!? I've taken one level up and have been challenged to have the courage to say something to those who are disrespectful and have also been told that I need to earn my stripes in the organization and it is my job to get people to respect me and to convince them my work is important. I don't want to go into the details of my work, but again, I didn't hire myself. Had I known my responsibility was to convince people what I was hired to do was important for the organization, I would NEVER have taken the job. I am not the right person to do that. I am solid implementer and can get things done, but I am not the sales person. Different skill set than I possess. I say again, I may not be super social or the popular one, but I am not an ******* and I am always professional and I treat people with respect and kindness even though I should start behaving like an *******. It is an odd odd work environment. It is a humanitarian organization, which shocks me how people treat one another. Anyway, I tend to wax on as I am in the thick of it, but thank you so much for the insight.

The Tough Nickel article. Is exactly it! Wow!

There is one other thing. Moon in Aquarius attempts to "stay above it all", and not get involved in the down and dirty infighting that some types seem to live for. Problem is, it's like a cage match, and keeping your emotional distance doesn't usually work in those situations. You want to keep it all about the work, and coming up with solutions that benefit the company. They're in it for the psycho-drama which doesn't interest you in the slightest.
Since your Moon is on the Cusp, Pisces is involved as well. A Pisces Moon wants to keep things mellow and friendly, which fits nicely with a Libra Sun. But, Pisces Moon doesn't have that Aquarian Moon ability to be emotionally detached, and gets its feelings hurt easily, although it is willing to forgive and forget, if at all possible.

Spot on about my moon and never looked at that way. Thank you! I truly cannot tolerate drama and just want to do what is right for our patients. PLUS I do get my feelings hurt and I don’t show it. I think the emotional distance makes me a target a bit as well as I don’t really engage in the after work conversations that tend to focus on blaming and waxing on about work stuff. When I was younger yes, but as I’ve gotten older I really can’t be bothered. Plus the first year I got here I had my senior dog with me and would have to rush home after work.

In the end I need to move on. It’s time - it isn’t going to get better, but I want to learn the lesson and truly start afresh somewhere. The work environment is important to me despite the emotional distance.

CLx2, thanks for the feedback.

I really feel for you. This thread is about you, not about me, but if misery loves company, I had something very similar happen to me in the 1990s, when I moved to a part of eastern Canada that was pretty anti-American. (The West is a lot more welcoming.) On top of that, I was the first senior woman in a male-oriented, traditional culture; and there had been a strong faction prior to my appointment who wanted a different candidate. They couldn't just turf me out, as I was a tenured academic at a university, so a bunch of them simply tried to make my life sufficiently miserable so that I would leave. The hard part was the gossip campaign. People wouldn't tell me to my face what they would say to one another-- and to the students. I finally filed a sexual harrassment/discrimination complaint with my provincial human rights commission, which my supervisors settled by immediately giving me all of the redress I requested. Happily I was able to take a very early retirement and leave with a golden handshake. Now I live in a beautiful mountain valley with my husband, and am fortunate to have good friends.

You're absolutely absolutely correct in your assessment in the logic of your situation. Unfortunately, sweet reason isn't where it's at with some of these tormentors. Even the nicer ones can smell blood in the water. The timid ones may be afraid to side with you, for fear they will receive your kind of treatment from the alpha males. It's really primitive.

With transiting Pluto, I think you are being asked to let go of everything you thought was true about your identity. This doesn't mean caving in to those Neanderthals in your workplace, but rethinking your sense of self from the ground up.

Oh, and have you read Invictus lately? Very Pluto-sun.

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/51642/invictus

I forgot to mention that the above workplace horrors took place with transiting Pluto square sun followed by Pluto square natal Mars.

My sympathies.

I am sorry that happened to you. What small lives people have that this is what they do. Unreal. It is indeed teaching me a lot about me and am learning to stand my ground more than ever before and work through some old family history/trauma ****. At least this all helps not to fall into victim mode. Hopefully on the other side will be a more rewarding job.

waybread said:

I forgot to mention that the above workplace horrors took place with transiting Pluto square sun followed by Pluto square natal Mars.

My sympathies.

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One way to look at it is: As pairs, Pluto and the Sun, and Pluto and Mars, have a combined protective effect. So, when they're in Square or Opposition, that protection is less available. I tend to think of Pluto as a helpful, rather than a hurtful, influence.

As astrologer Steven Forrest put it, no planet is in our chart just to hurt us. We do have some choices as to whether we learn from and express a planet's positive "teacher" mode or its negative "trickster" mode.

When a planet bites us in the ***, it's often because we haven't incorporated its positive, helpful meanings.

Saturn through Pluto are often planets symbolizing energies that people deny or suppress. They aren't easy to handle for many of us.

I'm not a huge fan of Jungian "modern psychological astrology" but one thing I think Jung got right is that if there is something within ourselves that we deny or suppress because it's not OK with us, then we tend to paste it onto other people who seemingly embody those unwanted negative traits. Put astrologically, if Pluto's negative traits of domination and bullying are abhorrent to us, we tend to deny them within ourselves, and then to attract people who seemingly embody the unwanted traits, because the chart has to express itself in some fashion.

But we all have Pluto in our charts somewhere. Part of healing Pluto's problems is actually to get kind of down and dirty, and to admit that we have within us the capacity to dig deep, reach deep within ourselves, and slug back at the universe.

Once I understood that I am all of the planets in my chart, my Pluto problem got a lot better. This wasn't a pretty sight, but once I "got it," it was a huge help.

If people don't have a particular issue with what a planet symbolizes, then they are unlikely to experience the hard edge of its trickster side, and more likely to benefit from its teacher mode.

Nobody said this was going to be easy. But sometimes, "the way out is the way through."

Right. There's a tendency to think we're being "targeted" by Planetary forces beyond our control, and that we're all just victims of our Natal-charts.

david starling said:

Right. There's a tendency to think we're being "targeted" by Planetary forces beyond our control, and that we're all just victims of our Natal-charts.

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Right - that was my mother's way of astrology. I grew up with astrology, but it was always doom and gloom "brace yourself"

I don't think that, which is why I posted - what energy should I be working with. I think it can be an insight to our blindspots and what we are not seeing and need to work with. I am just not very good at the interpretation.