Can a 4th house Chiron ever find a secure home?

Hi

Wondering about this placement. I do follow and research on Chiron and interested in hearing other's views on this placement. Its Chiron in Aries in the 4th house, in square with my natal Sun. Aries is in the IC. The wound inside me originates from my sense of, or lack of, father from the age of 6ish, feeling of rejection, worthlessness and insecurity. I'm late 30s now and have spend a great deal of my life working through and understanding these issues. It has manifested in my external life, especially in the home where I just cannot seem to settle down for more than max 4 years, because I'm lodging in different places. At my age, most people seem to have their own places by now, I just seem quite undeveloped in the housing area. It really hurts when I sometimes look at my situation and where I'd like to be, especially now as I'm approaching 40s. I guess its a crisis that may lead somewhere else, though I do feel stuck in a very long tunnel with no way out.

I was always unsure of my drive (Aries) and how I asserted myself. There was always an imbalance in this, either going too far or not doing enough. Its better now, through experience and trials.

With Sun square Chiron, I've found through my life, when I tried to assert myself from an ego vibration, I usually failed or got a backlash. I feel this square has been reflected in my chakra and through my posture, as I study these links indepth. The solar plexus chakra is where my wound is,the ego drive, which was in my posture, before I corrected it and also got a structural wound that I am now rehabilitating.

But can a person with a 4th house Chiron wound ever find their own home, or place of security? A couple of years ago, I moved a ridiculous amount of times, 7 times in 2 years. This was when Uranus was squaring my 4th house ruler. But through that madness, I found and discovered an inner security which is when I settled down to where I am currently living.

My chart is in my signature, I'd be really interested in hearing views of this placement.
Thanks

Chiron in the 4th house acts somewhat like Chiron in Cancer. Im of Chiron in Cancer generation and I can find my self feeling the same as you feel.

Chiron in 4th house or Cancer, indeed its a wond made by our parents, specially the father. It is always some kind of absence, could be physical, could be emotional. In Aries and squaring Sun, so when your Chiron wound activates it immediately affects your Ego and essence (the sun), and drive Mars, adding that Aries is the sign where the Sun is exalted.
With your Chiron position you always feel like a fish out of the water, like if you will never find a place where you can feel secure or "at home" cause that area of your life feels broken to you and you didn't experience that reliability in your home at your first years.

What you say seems to be good. Learning to feel at home right on the place you are now. You have to learn that it is not the place where you live or the ambient you are experiencing right now in your actual home. It is just the ghost of a wound of a broken home in your youth, so that doesn't mean that actually you are facing it now. It is in you unconscious, and you have to face it, settling down in where you are now. If you don't face it, then wherever you go will feel unsafe to you.

I sure hope so! I, too, have Chiron in the 4th in Aries & moved A LOT. I stopped counting after 30 moves & I'm 43. Pretty much what you described in feelings of insecurities & asserting (Aries) drive then pulling back, I've also experienced.

Getting back to a steady home, I'm currently shopping around for a mortgage to buy a co-op within 3-6 months. Can't wait as I am in a small studio & not proud...not at this age. But thankfully work has been steady & I got my finances in order. I'm a few years older than you, so perhaps you'll be settling down soon, too.

Adding to the discourse here, just for the record. I have chiron in cancer (12th), and grew up with a female who had chiron in the 4th. I can confirm this anomaly.

Chiron is a great planet to interpret and I would imagine to incorporate.

Wonder what the upside is of this, like once the wound is healed.

Neptune Rising said:

But can a person with a 4th house Chiron wound ever find their own home, or place of security? A couple of years ago, I moved a ridiculous amount of times, 7 times in 2 years. This was when Uranus was squaring my 4th house ruler. But through that madness, I found and discovered an inner security which is when I settled down to where I am currently living.

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There it is

This is a really intetesting thread! Personally, I am learning and try to follow traditional astrology so Im really not so sure where Chiron fits with that ideology. I also have Chiron in the 4th house in Pisces that trines my Asc in Scorpio but I have had to face the issue of homelessness several times in my life now, however, when I am settled I am very stable. Im getting pretty long in the tooth to have to deal with this issue. I had an unstable step-dad in my youth and I didnt get to know my biological father till I was 16 with almost disasterous consequenses!

God bless us all!!
S5

virgo18 said:

Chiron in 4th house or Cancer, indeed its a wond made by our parents, specially the father. It is always some kind of absence, could be physical, could be emotional. In Aries and squaring Sun, so when your Chiron wound activates it immediately affects your Ego and essence (the sun), and drive Mars, adding that Aries is the sign where the Sun is exalted.
With your Chiron position you always feel like a fish out of the water, like if you will never find a place where you can feel secure or "at home" cause that area of your life feels broken to you and you didn't experience that reliability in your home at your first years.

What you say seems to be good. Learning to feel at home right on the place you are now. You have to learn that it is not the place where you live or the ambient you are experiencing right now in your actual home. It is just the ghost of a wound of a broken home in your youth, so that doesn't mean that actually you are facing it now. It is in you unconscious, and you have to face it, settling down in where you are now. If you don't face it, then wherever you go will feel unsafe to you.

Click to expand...

Yes totally this is how its felt. I have lived 4 years in shared accomodation twice, those were the longest times I've settled anywhere, except my childhood flat with my mother. I've lived abroad for 6 months with my mum as my parents were divorcing. I guess its the lesson for me to share and be a lodger in different people's houses to learn to find stability in myself. And instead of a false sense of self where I compensate for lack of self belief, I eventually establish a true sense of self and inner security. Lol, its been a slow process, some 20 years! But, then that's my impatience too, Mars in the first house. Mars is trine Chiron.

Moradiva said:

Getting back to a steady home, I'm currently shopping around for a mortgage to buy a co-op within 3-6 months. Can't wait as I am in a small studio & not proud...not at this age. But thankfully work has been steady & I got my finances in order. I'm a few years older than you, so perhaps you'll be settling down soon, too.

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Wow congratulations!! I'm not at that stage yet, started self employment in 2010 and its slow to build it up. Gives me hope though to see you're able to do it!

Funnily enough, since I started doing what I truly enjoy for a vocation instead of desk work, I felt more settled though I was in the throws of this marathon 7 times in 2 years house moving. But to make up my wages, I also was given, I didn't look for it, a job in real estate. So I round now one day a week, showing people houses and watching how they find a way to settle. It's just like life is saying to me, 'this is how you do it'. Maybe its reflecting something that I have inside.

I've also wondered if I will live abroad, maybe I will find myself settling abroad somewhere. I used to frequently see card readers and several of them have said I will live abroad. My Mars in Sagittarius in first house is trine the Chiron. Well I have lived abroad already, in my early years (first house) perhaps I will again.

Hermetica said:

Wonder what the upside is of this, like once the wound is healed.

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I've often wondered. Its a good question. I've heard that maybe we don't ever heal the wound. I'm not sure, I know it gets better with time but it's always there, we can just use that wisdom somehow in our lives. We alchemicalise it...

serafin5 said:

I had an unstable step-dad in my youth and I didnt get to know my biological father till I was 16 with almost disasterous consequenses!

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Me too though I grew up with my mum and dad till I was 6. At 16 I got to know him closer for a few years but it exploded in the end and I've not seen him since.

I wonder how it works with a father-associated wound that reflects in security issues. For me, I feel its unrealistic expectations that I had of him, that really needed to be found in myself. Though, for me at least, while young it wasn't possible to ground and understand the nature of these projections.

It would depend on what is ruling the 4th and the planets there and their aspects. Chiron is supposedly the healer but I dont use it really. It certainly would not have much influence on your home and roots. If you do use it, only 2 degree orb.

Claire, I can say from my own experience that Chiron in my chart is relevant. I do feel its effects which is what I wanted to discuss. It was very relevant in my home and my roots and has had its part in shaping my personality.

NeptuneRising my heart goes out to you truely. And in answer to your comment about "unrealistic expectations" my reply is sure, it would be reasonable to attribute that when any relationship doesnt work out but also in our case we were looking for father-figures in the men that are our biological dads and didnt raise us and didnt get to know us as their children. We probably were strangers to them basically. And society puts a lot of pressure on how one "should be" as such. However, we were idealistic children looking for a bit of love and guidence from these men and my father, I feel still bore some responsibility to me. Overall my father just broke my heart!!! I did not see it going down like this at all. He was a Pastor of his own Christian ( Evangelical) Church, an excellent teacher of the Bible and a hands-on dad to his other 2 kids born to his wife (I was a "love child" from the 60's).

God bless you Neptune
S5

Neptune Rising said:

I've often wondered. Its a good question. I've heard that maybe we don't ever heal the wound. I'm not sure, I know it gets better with time but it's always there, we can just use that wisdom somehow in our lives. We alchemicalise it...

Click to expand...

Following this thread with interest, [with natal Sun opp Chiron, Moon square Chiron] I would comment that our wounds are healed, if we are lucky enough in life to reach a point where we are not so attached to them, attached to their negative affects.

This truly can happen. We can surrender our attachment to the pain and sadness, to the hurt. And when we do, the pain and sadness remains, but there is also very deep and profound healing. It's out there for all of us.

Wishing you the best.

serafin5 said:

NeptuneRising my heart goes out to you truely. And in answer to your comment about "unrealistic expectations" my reply is sure, it would be reasonable to attribute that when any relationship doesnt work out but also in our case we were looking for father-figures in the men that are our biological dads and didnt raise us and didnt get to know us as their children. We probably were strangers to them basically. And society puts a lot of pressure on how one "should be" as such. However, we were idealistic children looking for a bit of love and guidence from these men and my father, I feel still bore some responsibility to me. Overall my father just broke my heart!!! I did not see it going down like this at all. He was a Pastor of his own Christian ( Evangelical) Church, an excellent teacher of the Bible and a hands-on dad to his other 2 kids born to his wife (I was a "love child" from the 60's).

God bless you Neptune
S5

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Yes this resonates so much with how I feel, felt. I understand when you say, your father broke your heart. My relationship with my father broke my heart. Though, when I did try to forge some relationship with him when I was 16ish, he and his wife told me partly it was my fault that I saw so little of him, from the time they took me on holiday with them - I was age 9ish, I got angry with him and told him I don't want to see him. Half of me knows that just wasn't responsible parenting from him, but half does feel maybe I broke his heart too, because he loved me. And I guess that is the wound that I've learned and am learning to accept and come to terms with, instead of just reacting to and projecting out to my relationships.

Even though I do have a step father, I could never look on him as my 'step father', to me he is my mothers' partner. He does look out for me and it took me years to start to trust him.

My father also was a 'hands on' father and husband with his wife (the woman he has been with since my folks got divorced) and her daughter. Of course, that hurts, I guess it always will, but then somehow, that pain changes.

IleneK said:

Following this thread with interest, [with natal Sun opp Chiron, Moon square Chiron] I would comment that our wounds are healed, if we are lucky enough in life to reach a point where we are not so attached to them, attached to their negative affects.

This truly can happen. We can surrender our attachment to the pain and sadness, to the hurt. And when we do, the pain and sadness remains, but there is also very deep and profound healing. It's out there for all of us.

Wishing you the best.

Click to expand...

Thank you Ilene, yes I agree with this too. Moon square Chiron, that must be quite something. I can only imagine, having just come out of a Chiron conjunct to Moon transit, just barely dragged myself out of that one and still stunned, bewildered and just getting my breath back and wiping my tears and trying to come to terms with it.

The pain of Chiron, yes I agree that it does change. I am somehow loosing my attachment with the pain, the reaction. This is for my Chiron 4th house square Sun. Not sure about the aftermath of the Chiron/Moon transit. For me, at some point, I started to come to terms with what has been my upbringing and my experience of my father and home life. I used to write to him birthday and Christmas cards, hoping that he would write back, I did that for over a decade but a few years ago decided to let it go and accept I may never see him again. Even though it hurts, it has been healing for me to do that. I see the change in my relationships and the types of men I attract now. I think Chiron wounds help us mature. A bit like the Hero's Journey, the Apotheosis is the part where the wound transforms into healing. But, the whole experience of Chiron, I think, can be likened to the Hero's Journey.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monomyth

I also wonder, how the 4th house Chiron relates to the family, the family roots/inheritance. For me, Mars rules my 4th house, and Mars is in Sagittarius. Its trine Chiron, though I've never really understood that. The family that I am in touch with all live abroad. My mum is the only person I have in this country, and I'm not really close to my extended family (they are on my mum's side). I have no idea where my fathers family are, or how they are. He also has lost touch with them, I understand. I feel very disconnected to my extended family, my roots, I've never felt like I belonged to any particular 'tribe' (4th house). A friend told me how he met his wife, and how he found his 'tribe'. I was so jealous, not of his situation but of everyone who has found a 'tribe' to belong with, hand wondered if I would ever find a 'tribe' where I belonged. I think that may also be a trait of a 4th house wound. Though, maybe one day, those without a tribe make their own..

Neptune Rising said:

Thank you Ilene, yes I agree with this too. Moon square Chiron, that must be quite something. I can only imagine, having just come out of a Chiron conjunct to Moon transit, just barely dragged myself out of that one and still stunned, bewildered and just getting my breath back and wiping my tears and trying to come to terms with it.

The pain of Chiron, yes I agree that it does change. I am somehow loosing my attachment with the pain, the reaction. This is for my Chiron 4th house square Sun. Not sure about the aftermath of the Chiron/Moon transit. For me, at some point, I started to come to terms with what has been my upbringing and my experience of my father and home life. I used to write to him birthday and Christmas cards, hoping that he would write back, I did that for over a decade but a few years ago decided to let it go and accept I may never see him again. Even though it hurts, it has been healing for me to do that. I see the change in my relationships and the types of men I attract now. I think Chiron wounds help us mature. A bit like the Hero's Journey, the Apotheosis is the part where the wound transforms into healing. But, the whole experience of Chiron, I think, can be likened to the Hero's Journey.

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As your Chiron aspects the Sun, the hero, Chiron will have the flavor of the Hero's Journey in your life. And as a person who teaches a healing practice to others, you also heal yourself, much like the mythological Chiron.

IleneK said:

As your Chiron aspects the Sun, the hero, Chiron will have the flavor of the Hero's Journey in your life. And as a person who teaches a healing practice to others, you also heal yourself, much like the mythological Chiron.

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Ah I see, thanks Ilene for explaining. Yes I guess my Chiron has a masculine or yang type of energy, with Sun and Mars aspecting it, and it being in Aries. Its like, I have to take some type of action, initiative to find ways of healing. A friend also mentioned once, he first mentioned the Hero's Journey to me in myth and in relation to teaching. I do find, looking at what's happened with me since I started teaching, I've explored the yoga and other exercise so much more deeply, finding ways to explain this and convey this as clear as I can, and its also helped me to heal and understand so much more how to heal. Somehow, old wounds that I held physically and structurally in my body became so apparent, even worsening to the point of crisis where I had no option but to find a way to heal them myself. I had some help from a physiotherapist who came to my classes, I saw the essence of a Shamen in him, he's the only one I could trust to help me. The whole experience has helped me develop an authentic practice where before I may not have delved that deep.

Neptune what you were saying about the 4th hse wound of feeling alienated from ones "Tribe" really hits home with me!!! My mom was English, French, Irish, and Native American and my dad was from Nicaragua, Central America and I have been rejected by both. Ive had identity issues almost my whole life and being a cusp birthday DID NOT help!!! However, at least for me its appropo that Chiron is in the 4th hse having soooo many issues here. Even now and it brakes my heart; Im so tired of hoping for love from people either unwilling or unable.

God bless you
S5