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  #1  
Unread 01-26-2021, 01:44 PM
PlutorisingLee PlutorisingLee is offline
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Astrologer kinda said I'm gay

A pretty well-experienced Astrologer who I was asking about relationships really surprised me. He said that based on my natal chart I would be happier dating women.
I am not sure what got him to that conclusion but it really hit a nerve for me.

Based on my chart would I be happier in a same-sex relationship?
What in the chart could have indicated that for him?

You can stop here or read my ideas on why he said that:

I know myself pretty well and I definitely fall in love and can have healthy relationships with men.
That being said, they would always take a toll on me (Mars in 7th, DSC ruler in the house of secret enemies, Pluto generationally opposed to most men I date).
Men initially give me energy because they trigger my Mars and give it aspects- but they also tend to end up going against my goals and success and general spiritual/physical energy level.

Women- I don't gravitate to them as much for friendship but they tend to actually bring me good luck and support behind my back. I adore and respect them but can find them intimidating.
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  #2  
Unread 01-26-2021, 05:19 PM
Cary2 Cary2 is offline
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Re: Astrologer kinda said I'm gay

Many of the gays I've known carry a belief that most people are gay but they don't have the courage to face the "truth". In fact many of those people had the habit of referring to heterosexual folks as "breeders" which is clearly a term of derision. I am convinced that there is no reliable astrological signature for homosexuality, though some astrologers believe that hard aspects between Venus and Neptune tend to suggest gayness.

I think the astrologer in question based his assessment of your sexuality on the close trine of Venus to Uranus-Neptune plus the T-square Venus/Saturn/Pluto.

Your chart shows that you may have unpleasant experiences in the matter of romance and you may have times of being very unhappy about your love life, but it does not indicate homosexuality. Many people are less than enthused about their relationship history. Happy relationships are not exactly common.

Unfortunately astrology is often infected with many forms of prejudice, including prejudice toward heterosexual folks.

The trine from Uranus-Neptune to Venus suggests that you have high ideals about romance and that you are somewhat mystical and very imaginative about love--a love mystic.

The T-square Venus-Saturn-Pluto suggests that something frequently interrupts your relationships or the relationships seem to erode slowly.

The square of Venus to Saturn means that you are deeply hurt by the inadequacies of your love life, though you may triumph over that eventually.

I think you were misinformed by a prejudiced astrologer who was himself misinformed.
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  #3  
Unread 01-26-2021, 07:36 PM
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Re: Astrologer kinda said I'm gay

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Originally Posted by Cary2 View Post
I am convinced that there is no reliable astrological signature for homosexuality.

<...>

I think you were misinformed by a prejudiced astrologer who was himself misinformed.
I am in complete agreement. Thank you, Cary.
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  #4  
Unread 01-26-2021, 07:52 PM
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Re: Astrologer kinda said I'm gay

I'm not going to say what you are or what you are not; but what I can say is that your fear of relationships and rejection will lead to you question your sexuality. Because of the difficulty you have of opening up and of feelings of self-worth, you will wonder if it means something more. Also, you will find that it is difficult develop healthy relationships in the sense of complete intimacy. The latter, however, will actually be okay with you as you will have feelings of affection that come and go, that in many ways (and please don't take this the wrong way), you tend to leave relationships not only out of wanting to protect yourself but also of wanting to have things your own way, on your terms.

Also, even though you say that women are wonderful friends, you will discover, in time, that you actually do not get along with women very well, not as well as you think at least, and that women will, in many instances, be a sore spot and headache for you in much of your life.
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Unread 01-26-2021, 08:23 PM
PlutorisingLee PlutorisingLee is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cary2 View Post
Many of the gays I've known carry a belief that most people are gay but they don't have the courage to face the "truth". In fact many of those people had the habit of referring to heterosexual folks as "breeders" which is clearly a term of derision. I am convinced that there is no reliable astrological signature for homosexuality, though some astrologers believe that hard aspects between Venus and Neptune tend to suggest gayness.

I think the astrologer in question based his assessment of your sexuality on the close trine of Venus to Uranus-Neptune plus the T-square Venus/Saturn/Pluto.

Your chart shows that you may have unpleasant experiences in the matter of romance and you may have times of being very unhappy about your love life, but it does not indicate homosexuality. Many people are less than enthused about their relationship history. Happy relationships are not exactly common.

Unfortunately astrology is often infected with many forms of prejudice, including prejudice toward heterosexual folks.

The trine from Uranus-Neptune to Venus suggests that you have high ideals about romance and that you are somewhat mystical and very imaginative about love--a love mystic.

The T-square Venus-Saturn-Pluto suggests that something frequently interrupts your relationships or the relationships seem to erode slowly.

The square of Venus to Saturn means that you are deeply hurt by the inadequacies of your love life, though you may triumph over that eventually.

I think you were misinformed by a prejudiced astrologer who was himself misinformed.
Thanks for your reply.
I agree you can't see sexual orientation in a chart. I mean, the idea of categories like gay/strught is all very modern and doesn't reflect human experience fully.

What you said about Venus/Neptune Uranus is very accurate for me but I do think it might explain that potentially if there is a spiritual or emotional connection with any person regardless of gender...I could fall in love or be attracted to them.
These people are rare but I wouldn't limit it to a specific gender.

Also I can have very fast moving relationships with long periods of single in between.

Last edited by PlutorisingLee; 01-26-2021 at 08:32 PM.
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  #6  
Unread 01-26-2021, 08:29 PM
PlutorisingLee PlutorisingLee is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cypocryphy View Post
I'm not going to say what you are or what you are not; but what I can say is that your fear of relationships and rejection will lead to you question your sexuality. Because of the difficulty you have of opening up and of feelings of self-worth, you will wonder if it means something more. Also, you will find that it is difficult develop healthy relationships in the sense of complete intimacy. The latter, however, will actually be okay with you as you will have feelings of affection that come and go, that in many ways (and please don't take this the wrong way), you tend to leave relationships not only out of wanting to protect yourself but also of wanting to have things your own way, on your terms.

Also, even though you say that women are wonderful friends, you will discover, in time, that you actually do not get along with women very well, not as well as you think at least, and that women will, in many instances, be a sore spot and headache for you in much of your life.
You can be blunt I don't mind at all

I think if I do leave a relationship it's because there isn't real intimacy or the level of authenticity I'd like. That, or to put it frankly I had to leave some relationships because they were abusive.

You are right that I'd rather be single than in a in a relationship "not on my terms" but I'm also too accepting of anyone's faults.
I am very loyal and if anything...I tend to stay too long with people who are wrong for me.

I'm navigating a balance between high standards that keep me safe from abuse and real deep connections that are meaningful.

I think women and men both pose thier own issues for me. You are probably referring to my Moon Venus aspects?

Still, what I'm curious us what the dynamic in pros and cons would be for me if I do date women?

That is the truth seeking question here.

Last edited by PlutorisingLee; 01-26-2021 at 08:31 PM.
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  #7  
Unread 01-26-2021, 09:09 PM
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Re: Astrologer kinda said I'm gay

At a glance, I don't see any features of homosexuality but there are barriers to love (Sun-Saturn) coldness from father figure but that is similar to the Moon-Saturn as well. The unconventional aspects are Venus-Uranus and as pointed previously those in link with Neptune. Mars in 7th actually indicates that you 'project' your aggression onto your partners. It means that you unconsciously choose those who provoke your aggression. Mars in the 7th is not a good feature but it can be overcome with 'self-knowledge' and ownership of your energy. It is in Aries so in it's own sign hence more likely to be impulsive/expressive. Relationships are a personal choice, you should be with the one you feel attracted to-it's natural.
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  #8  
Unread 01-26-2021, 09:40 PM
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Re: Astrologer kinda said I'm gay

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Originally Posted by PlutorisingLee View Post
You can be blunt I don't mind at all
Thanks for the feed back! So being blunt—the poor and abusive relationships are due to your sense of self-worth or poor sense of self. There are esteem issues. There's the "lack of developing healthy relationships and being able to have complete intimacy," as previously mentioned. It goes without saying that you can't really have that true intimacy in an abusive relationship because of the negativity involved and power dynamics.

Also, you stuck in them too long because your partner's are controlling, and that's in large part because of in your chart.

I don't have your chart up at the moment ...

Oh! I almost forgot. To your question of whether I was referring to your / aspect. Your post was interesting because one of my last posts was on this subject. I had, at one point, been doing studies on various statistical instances of astrological phenomena, and I thought it would be interesting if homosexuality could be determined in a chart. So I copied from that post what I had written, and I'll post it here:

Quote:
Here are the bare bone, most rudimentary markers that you will find in charts of people who are filomofylía:

There will be either one or both of these aspects to
• There is an aspect from to , usually a or but not always.
• There is an aspect from to .
• There is an aspect to from both and (frequently)
• And when or does not directly aspect , either will do so by means of a complex.
There will also be aspects of to in some form:



Also, there will almost always be an excess of negative polarities in the chart.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PlutorisingLee View Post
I think if I do leave a relationship it's because there isn't real intimacy or the level of authenticity I'd like. That, or to put it frankly I had to leave some relationships because they were abusive.
Yes. That will be in large part due to (1) your impulsiveness in relationships, and (2) because of, well, it's two fold because I can look at in two ways, from a psychological and from a material point of view. The psychological is due to poor feelings of self-worth, which can be worked on. The other, the actual, when tends to take on more of a deterministic aspect, is that you will tend to enter relationships that are controlling. There is a lot of fear mixed in with your love, too. And a lot of changeability and changing of situations within the relationships, that there will be drama, lots of highs and lows.

Quote:
You are right that I'd rather be single than in a in a relationship "not on my terms" but I'm also too accepting of anyone's faults.
That's the "fear of reaction." The fear of rejection is sometimes expressed as not letting go because letting go or leaving the situation resembled rejection in some ways. Fear of rejection is fear of being alone, in many situations.

Quote:
I am very loyal and if anything...I tend to stay too long with people who are wrong for me.
Yes. I bet you are. But you also don't like a boring relationship. And I mean boring in the sense that you are bored if things do not have a crisis point every so often.

Quote:
I'm navigating a balance between high standards that keep me safe from abuse and real deep connections that are meaningful.
Always go for safe to avoid injury, psychological or otherwise.

Quote:
I think women and men both pose thier own issues for me. You are probably referring to my Moon Venus aspects? Still, what I'm curious us what the dynamic in pros and cons would be for me if I do date women?
With women, I can see a competitiveness with women, with an older woman. An older woman would be one that understands you and would help you feel comfortable. But in the same sense, would also feel controlling. But you'll rebel, which will help create a crisis situation, which in turn will make sure it won't be boring. She'll also be a loner, independent.



Quote:
That is the truth seeking question here.
I hope that rings true, and I hope that helps!

P.S. I think you will find that you are more strongly attracted to men. However, as you can see, you have clear cut markers for variation in sexual preference. That's why I responded.
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Last edited by Cypocryphy; 01-26-2021 at 09:47 PM. Reason: Post Script
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  #9  
Unread 01-27-2021, 08:54 AM
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Re: Astrologer kinda said I'm gay

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Originally Posted by Blackempress View Post
At a glance, I don't see any features of homosexuality but there are barriers to love (Sun-Saturn) coldness from father figure but that is similar to the Moon-Saturn as well. The unconventional aspects are Venus-Uranus and as pointed previously those in link with Neptune. Mars in 7th actually indicates that you 'project' your aggression onto your partners. It means that you unconsciously choose those who provoke your aggression. Mars in the 7th is not a good feature but it can be overcome with 'self-knowledge' and ownership of your energy. It is in Aries so in it's own sign hence more likely to be impulsive/expressive. Relationships are a personal choice, you should be with the one you feel attracted to-it's natural.

Very much so except the last point

Who we are attracted too is often a result of trauma or our own psychological projection- not always an indication of our natural inclination and needs prior t that. Most people are not attracted to what is best for them but to thier shadow.
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Unread 01-27-2021, 09:13 AM
PlutorisingLee PlutorisingLee is offline
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Re: Astrologer kinda said I'm gay

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Originally Posted by Cypocryphy View Post
Thank you Cypocryphy and for the most part correct although there are some naunces. For example, I like being alone a lot but yes I'm aware of the issues you pointed out.

Quote:
Also, you stuck in them too long because your partner's are controlling, and that's in large part because of in your chart.
Considering Saturn is in the 5th house of romance and my 7th house rulers (Uranus-Neptune) are better aspected. Could it be this situation of control/restriction becomes more 'free' after commitment or marriage?

Moving from the 5th house to the 7th.

Quote:
Oh! I almost forgot. To your question of whether I was referring to your / aspect. Your post was interesting because one of my last posts was on this subject. I had, at one point, been doing studies on various statistical instances of astrological phenomena, and I thought it would be interesting if homosexuality could be determined in a chart. So I copied from that post what I had written..
That is an interesting study. I personally know many gay and bisexual people and look at their charts+ celebrities.
For what's it worth a high level are born around Capricorn/Sagittarius. Solar Sagittarius's born around late 1980s or 1990 have a stellium in Capricorn with Venus or Mercury conjunct Uranus/Neptune.
Among bisexual friends, I notice a high level of Virgo Asc. I think it is because the 7th house is ruled by Pisces and the ruler Neptune in their case is hardly aspected. I'm lucky to have a more relaxed Neptune situation.

Quote:
Yes. I bet you are. But you also don't like a boring relationship. And I mean boring in the sense that you are bored if things do not have a crisis point every so often.
This is true although I'd add to that that a person needs to be strong enough to push back against me (kinda like cute puppies fighting) without doing or meaning any real harm. For example, I've tried dating someone who had a truly compatible chart to Synastry&Composite wise but a Mars in Cancer. He found this hurtful and didn't want to 'fight'. I found him "weak" for finding me intimidating.

Quote:
With women, I can see a competitiveness with women, with an older woman. An older woman would be one that understands you and would help you feel comfortable. But in the same sense, would also feel controlling. But you'll rebel, which will help create a crisis situation, which in turn will make sure it won't be boring. She'll also be a loner, independent.
I can see that in my life thanks.

I hope that rings true, and I hope that helps!

P.S. I think you will find that you are more strongly attracted to men. However, as you can see, you have clear cut markers for variation in sexual preference. That's why I responded.[/QUOTE]

Perhaps so! But I wonder what the would be the chart like for a compatible partner if male?

I surprisingly don't do well with fellow Scorpio Moon men.
Mars in Cancer or Libra is also problematic.
Moon in Pisces is beautiful but in my age group, they have Mars in Pisces too.
Those with Virgo Mars are perfect but they tend to have Leo Sun square my everything.

Just some observations
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