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  #1  
Unread 09-07-2014, 04:40 PM
AstroN AstroN is offline
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Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Thank you very much.


Last edited by AstroN; 10-17-2016 at 01:16 PM.
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  #2  
Unread 09-07-2014, 05:37 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

I think you have a few things going on here the contribute to your problem. You have Neptune conjunct the ASC with Jupiter, your Sag ASC ruler in sympathetic Pisces. You are perceived as very compassionate and helpful towards people which will naturally attract people who can take advantage of you. Neptune conjunct the ASC also can make you not see yourself clearly, whatever that entails, how you think you are coming across is not always the case.

Venus rules your 11th house of friendship with Uranus placed inside. Venus is in it's fall in Virgo and squaring Neptune. Neptune blurs lines or boundaries and can lead to disappointment with friendships as well as deception. Uranus in the 11th is disruptive and unpredictable with relationship beginning quickly and ending just as quickly. It's square Saturn, the planet of limitation, you may find you have few friends you can really trust.

I notice your Moon squares your Mars, this typically indicates issues surrounding the relationship with the mother. Perhaps this also plays out somewhat with your relationships with women.

I think setting boundaries and having good, solid self respect is a good beginning. In human nature, people don't typically appreciate things they don't have to work for. If you are doing things for people, although with very good intentions, many times they will not appreciate your help and in fact, not value you or take it for granted. I have learned this the hard way myself. Perhaps pouring your giving into a charity, maybe starving and abandoned dogs for example would be a good outlet for these energies as well as a very deserving of your big heart. I have noticed the more i give to my passion, the less these type of people come into my life.

Finally, give without regret or expectation.


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I try to help family and friends as much as I can - I do it from the bottom of my heart but people tend to take advantage, mistreat me, my kids and blame me for things that go wrong in their lives. It has come to a point where I cannot understand anymore as to why no matter what I do, I am hated for it and misjudged. Am even wondering if I am a bad person. Could you please help me understand my chart as to where I am going wrong. I attract men and friends and family, they like me initially, then I end up helping them and feel used as well as hurt. Please be honest. I will not take offence. Thank you very much.
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  #3  
Unread 09-07-2014, 06:04 PM
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Smile Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Your chart denotes the apparent reason for others mistreating you:
Sun opp Jupiter; through your generosity and caring [Jupiter in Pisces] others perceive a sense of vulnerability in you, so they don't think twice about hurting you, whether intentionally or not; in this case this would be a subconscious exchange of energies.
Jupiter is about judgment- [largely stemming from family] and the Sun represents your individual Identity and sense of self. From a karmic perspective, these other people in your life have been sent to test you in your ability to be resilient, strong and resistant to affronts; and all that depends on how you express your Identity, which is apparently confusing or disorienting to others.
Your Moon/Pluto alliance is associated with the concept of 'victimization'.

The other affliction in your chart is that of Neptune opposing Venus; another indication of vulnerability, which is often based on insecurities and lack of confidence that you experienced in childhood and youth. When our sense of self-esteem falters, we misunderstand the messages from the psyche that seems to suggest that we are weak. Think about your past, and all the times you were made to feel unworthy or invalidated. This has much to do with the imprinting and conditioning placed on you by your parents, which unfortunately still has impact on us in the later years.
NO you are not a bad person; think of how the Christ was treated as a martyr.

The resolution to this karmic testing must come from within, and this is shown by your Sun sextile Saturn, and strengthened by Jupiter trine Saturn as well. Only you can decide when enough is enough and take back the power that has been rudely taken away from you.
This is a subject that is close to my own heart, so if you care to message me, I can help to further interpret your chart....
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  #4  
Unread 09-07-2014, 06:06 PM
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ashriia ashriia is offline
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

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Originally Posted by AstroN View Post
I try to help family and friends as much as I can - I do it from the bottom of my heart but people tend to take advantage, mistreat me, my kids and blame me for things that go wrong in their lives. It has come to a point where I cannot understand anymore as to why no matter what I do, I am hated for it and misjudged. Am even wondering if I am a bad person. Could you please help me understand my chart as to where I am going wrong. I attract men and friends and family, they like me initially, then I end up helping them and feel used as well as hurt. Please be honest. I will not take offence. Thank you very much.
When I read your post, I immediately knew you would have neptune in hard aspect to venus. This is very classic venus/neptune trouble. And your neptune is angular making it a stronger energy in your life. I have neptune in sag in the 7th, opposed venus. And i've felt very similarly. And i see this type of deal with venus/neptune come up alot on this forum. Probably you give because you sincerely want to help someone, but then find that this isn't return when youre in need yourself? The way around this is to create better boundaries for yourself, use more discernment when you meet new people- because you may not be seeing someone clearly, and never - ever- give of yourself when your in a low period. you'll likely attract lots of people in need of help throughout your life. So use lots of discretion with how much you help someone - and most importantly, know what is too much. Create a self limit/boundary. That way you can help someone when you are able to and not feel completely heartbroken/disoriented if it's not returned. Not to say that it won't ever be though. But the rose colored glasses that neptune lends can have expectations from others, that just aren't "real"... they are idealisms.
Hope that helps, good luck

Last edited by ashriia; 09-07-2014 at 06:09 PM.
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  #5  
Unread 09-07-2014, 06:39 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Saturn in Cancer, definitely (hardship in emotional matters, family life and emotions bring a lot of pain), AND the fact its in the 8th (house of death, destruction, end of cycle, can bring a feeling of being controlled, persecuted).
Trine Jupiter in Pisces, and Neptune rising...all contribute to selfless devotion and leading to emotional pain, Pisces's theme is in large part 'martyrdom'...
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  #6  
Unread 09-07-2014, 06:45 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

It is draining to say the least. Though I get over one incident and another comes to stare me in the face.

Last edited by AstroN; 10-17-2016 at 01:19 PM.
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Unread 09-07-2014, 06:49 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

thanks..

Last edited by AstroN; 10-17-2016 at 01:18 PM.
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  #8  
Unread 09-07-2014, 07:15 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Wait, your chart is a bit of a bucket, and also a kite...the pivot point, if we see the chart as a bucket, is the Jup in Pisces...this means change and action in life come from the home, and family...
And your main focus in life should be work and associations based on all the planets in 10th and 11th house.
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  #9  
Unread 09-07-2014, 07:19 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Thanks - I am a workaholic and most of my peace of mind comes from working. It helps me forget my problems and ironically my work involves helping other people forget about their problems.
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  #10  
Unread 09-07-2014, 07:23 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Hi AstroN. I'm sorry to hear that your kind deeds are backfiring so frequently. I think there are a few things in your chart which are relevant to this.

Others have already mentioned the rising Neptune, with the ruler of the asc and Neptune, Jupiter, also angular and in Pisces. This says much about your empathy with those in need and your willingness to make sacrifices for them. It also suggests a tendency to lose yourself in your interactions with others, being what people need you to be, possibly resulting in confusion, for both yourself and the other, about who you are. It is common for strongly Neptune/Pisces people to attract 'users' who do not really want a proper relationship of whatever kind, but rather want to have their troubles or needs taken care.

The angles on which Neptune and the Pisces Jupiter are placed are the asc and the ic. The house cycle is a cycle of changing viewpoints from which to be self-conscious. Of the four critical points of this cycle - what we call the angles - the asc and the ic are the most subjective, representing types of self-consciousness which we identify with so readily that we don't even know we are doing it. The other angles - the des and the mc - represent types of self-consciousness which we reach for in a more obvious way, providing we can get sufficient leverage against the asc and ic respectively. As well as the des and mc, the Moon, the Sun, Venus and Mars are all ruled by Mercury, and I think that Mercury's exact conjunction with Pluto is very relevant to your situation.

In itself, Virgo needs to feel useful, and also needs to feel that everything is running efficiently. I don't know how this will manifest for you along side the Neptune-Pisces-Jupiter-Sagittarius theme, but these Virgo needs are very important to you on some level. It could be that when you are giving of yourself, you sometimes do so in such a way that others feel like you are trying to control them, even though this won't necessarily be your intention. It could be that you are drawn to those you have Virgo type control issues, making them more sensitive to this.

When we also consider that Mercury is so closely aspecting Pluto, what becomes apparent is that there is a potential for others to experience your help as intrusive - that they may end up feeling disempowered on some level and then react to that. However, I also think it is likely that you are sometimes drawn to people with negative Pluto issues - people who are happy to manipulate you for their own ends, who are more likely to feel disempowered, and who are more likely to turn on you at some point.

The issue of having clearer boundaries has already been mentioned, and boundaries are something that all earthy people need to approach in a healthy and concious manner, especially those who also have something boundary dissolving like Neptune rising and the chart ruler in Pisces. The other things that might be worth considering are, firstly, whether you use helping to get under the skin of others and take control of some area of their lives because this feeds a part of you of which you are not fully aware, and secondly, whether you tend to associate with people who are ruthless and manipulative underneath, even though they seem harmless and nice on the surface.

A couple of other things worth mentioning are Saturn in the 8th sextile the Sun, and Moon trine Uranus (I'm shying away from the wider aspects).

The 8th house represents the type of self-consciousness which arises when we share intimately with others. Saturn shows the area of life where we feel separate and perhaps inadequate, and where we may try to overcompensate and end up feeling a sense of futility and frustration for some reason. Saturn is in a water sign as well as a water house, and its close aspect to the Sun adds to its significance in the chart, and adds to this Virgo Sun's liking of control.

The Moon is in another relationship house - the 7th, which represents the type of self-consciousness which arises when we cooperate with others by following certain principles which are designed to bring about harmony. So your lunar instincts are telling you to interact with others, and this may add to your wish to help people out. But this Moon is in Gemini and is closely aspecting freedom-loving Uranus in the 11th house, which is another relationship house. If you don't recognise your need for breathing space, then others will act it out for you, and if they feel entangled due to your baggage and theirs (as discussed above) then their attempts to reinstate some distance could be messy and clumsy.

These are all speculative thoughts that you may want to consider, but which may not be relevant to you. Feel free to ask for clarification on anything. There is much humility in the way you have opened the thread, and I hope that you are rewarded by something useful in one or more of the replies.

Best wishes,
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True freedom and the end of suffering is living in such a way as if you had completely chosen whatever you feel or experience at this moment.

Eckhart Tolle, Stillness Speaks, page 118

Last edited by miquar; 09-07-2014 at 07:29 PM.
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  #11  
Unread 09-07-2014, 07:45 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

I thank everyone for helping me understand and every aspect is true, it makes sense.

Last edited by AstroN; 10-17-2016 at 01:18 PM.
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  #12  
Unread 09-07-2014, 08:17 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Hi. Thanks for your response. Part of the problem could be that people don't know how to relate to you when they don't need your help - that they see you as someone who is great to have on board in a crisis, but who is not necessarily easy to just hang out with. Its not that your chart suggests that you are a difficult person to get along with, but you say that you are a workaholic, and also that you do quickly get stuck in and get busy when someone approaches you for help. Just a thought...
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True freedom and the end of suffering is living in such a way as if you had completely chosen whatever you feel or experience at this moment.

Eckhart Tolle, Stillness Speaks, page 118
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Unread 09-07-2014, 08:29 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

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Originally Posted by miquar View Post
Hi. Thanks for your response. Part of the problem could be that people don't know how to relate to you when they don't need your help - that they see you as someone who is great to have on board in a crisis, but who is not necessarily easy to just hang out with. Its not that your chart suggests that you are a difficult person to get along with, but you say that you are a workaholic, and also that you do quickly get stuck in and get busy when someone approaches you for help. Just a thought...

Yes - I realise when they ask for help I just have to help them as soon as I can - although when I said I get stuck in to help them - I do it so that I can sort their problem out as soon as possible. So does that mean I should not agree to help straight away? Keep distance and choose to help even the new people so that I first feel them out and work out their intentions and if they seem to be using me I can refuse to help. That's what I am trying to achieve right now. It has been difficult to say no to them when they were mum or sister It is No contact with them right now but if they come to me out of the blue).. I sometimes wished that I was able to just say no and walk away - even if it is for 6 months and try to change myself but the guilt of saying no drives me insane. I am just hoping the chart is not indicative of martyrdom forever.

Last edited by AstroN; 09-07-2014 at 08:45 PM.
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Unread 09-07-2014, 08:47 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

I don't think your chart suggests eternal martyrdom. I think that whether or not to help in each case, and how much and how soon is one issue, and how you are around people in general is another issue. I don't know if your general manner somehow discourages people from just hanging out with you - its just a thought that may be worth considering. The need to be useful, and some kind of tension in your general way of being, may both stem from the Virgo part of your predispostion, and so they can both be eased by working through the relevant fears. But you won't need to do less for people necessarily - the point is that you will feel differently about helping and also about socialising when the fears have subsided to some extent.
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Unread 09-07-2014, 10:19 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

How does this aspect of Venus squaring Neptune affect my love life? Does this mean I see someone in a good light when they are not actually good for me and living in a dream world? Setting myself up for disappointments maybe? Thanks.
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Unread 09-08-2014, 05:47 AM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

It can mean that, but its quite a wide aspect, so less significant than Neptune rising.
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  #17  
Unread 09-09-2014, 06:17 AM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Miquar,
A 5 degree orb is quite wide? You must keep your orbs super tight! I thought the rule of thumb is anything over 8 degrees is probably too wide.
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Unread 09-09-2014, 08:56 AM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Hi. I do think that a square involving a personal planet with a 5 degree orb is worth considering, but I just keep in mind that there will other closer, and so more compelling, aspects.
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Unread 09-09-2014, 11:03 AM
AstroN AstroN is offline
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

Would I need to start a new thread if I wanted to know about love/relationships in general? How things look for me please?
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Unread 09-09-2014, 04:24 PM
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Re: Hi - Please help read my chart. Why am I always blamed for things I don't do

If the question was to be answered just using your natal chart then it should be fine here I think.
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