What are the conflicts?

Honeybee90

Active member
My boyfriend and I have been on and off for the past year, and I have done some research on our chart, like I know that in our composite chart we have a lot in our 12th house. But I want to understand exactly what the miscommunications may be coming from and what the neptune conjuct saturn really means . I attached the synastry and the composite info below.

Composite Horoscope midpoint method PLANETARY POSITIONS
planet sign degree
Sun Sagittarius 21°51'43 in house 12
Moon Aquarius 16°44'59 end of house 1
Mercury
Sagittarius 18°52'06 in house 12
Venus Capricorn 14°36'30 in house 1
Mars
Scorpio 20°35'08 in house 11
Jupiter Taurus 27°42'16 in house 5
Saturn Capricorn 3°26'25 in house 12
Uranus
Capricorn 0°38'41 in house 12
Neptune Capricorn 9°15'44 end of house 12
Pluto
Scorpio 13°56'08 end of house 10
True Node
Pisces 8°44'07 in house 2
HOUSE POSITIONS (Placidus)

Ascendant
Capricorn 10°54'41
2nd House
Aquarius 18°10'19
3rd House Pisces
19°46'12
Imum Coeli
Aries 18°11'36
5th House Taurus
15°08'39
6th House
Gemini 11°37'34
Descendant Cancer 10°54'41
8th House Leo 18°10'19
9th House Virgo 19°46'12
Medium Coeli Libra 18°11'36
11th House
Scorpio 15°08'39
12th House Sagittarius 11°37'34
 

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Honeybee90

Active member
If there is any other information needed I can provide it..I'm not really well versed in everything but I'd really appreciate some insight.
 

chris10

Well-known member
Thanks, I just updated it :), I'm the cap, he's the sag.

Since I'm new to astro, I can't give you an answer to your
question but I'll give my opinion on what I see.
First of all you have pluto conjuct ASC natally (just like I do).
That's a control aspect. You have the need for control.
Your saturn/ sun conjuction sextiling pluto emphasises the control factor even more
Your boyfriend's pluto also conjucts your ASC, a lot of manipulation between you maybe.
Your boyfriend natally has moon and venus in freedom loving sag and both planets are conjucting his saturn and his uranus. I think he needs stability (saturn), on the other hand freedom (uranus) so as to truly be/ express himself. He is also Sag sun.
The pluto/ASC aspect between your charts is probably an attraction factor but you may feel suffocated by it and then try to break loose.
I personally don't see any real problems between your charts.
This on-off situation may be due to the fact that there aren't saturn aspects to personal planets of the other, between the 2 charts. Saturn aspects help keep two people together.
I hope someone else can be of more help.
 

Honeybee90

Active member
Thank you for your insight. I really feel the most concern with our communication styles at times, I think it may be my aries moon's fault or maybe because I have planets in my 3rd house and he has none in his 3rd house but I really like to talk whenever i have an opinion (or it could be the control thing, though we don't manipulate each other), but then i can also be emotional which he doesn't always like and I admit I dislike in myself sometimes. But when I give him space instead he acts really loving and affectionate. What in his chart could give me insight in this, also he has a lot of planets in his 10th house and I have none, what does that mean, if anything?
 

Honeybee90

Active member
I updated the attachments with my correct birth time and synastry info below. Any more insight would be great. This has to be the most complicated relationship i've been in. Every time I give him space and try to move forward he wants to enter my life again, i've also never had such a desire to be with someone. My prior relationship I was able to walk away-like a lot of things in life I can usually move on to the next but with him I feel attachment. Is this just something up with my chart (a whiny aries moon perhaps?) He also says that sometimes he feels really into it making it work then he just can't do the commitment? I'm usually so much more in check but loving him-I need any insight! lol!
 

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Honeybee90

Active member
Can someone at least point me in a direction of a good book on the matter? lol. I know these forums are probably filled with these questions I just need a little insight. It's been over a year of confusion and intense passion. That's not normal/logical. Perhaps it's just my chart that is out of whack in this whole thing :/
 

Krewster

Well-known member
Not sure whether the a.m. desire to see synastric Sat connections can be satisfied by:

-his Sat 45 your Ven (13 min tight); and/or
-your Sat 45 his Sun (58 min).

The latter may be why he leaves (e.g., can't help but feel some restriction from you of which you are likely unaware, for among other reasons, because that part of you wouldn't affect another guy in the same adverse manner) and may also be why you take him back (e.g., because you are automatically in the Saturnian driver's seat which is comfy for you...or is it the opposite as sometimes occurs in synastry, that you are uncomfy with the way his Sun makes you feel unnecessarily Saturnian?).

Re communication issues, I see only his Jup loosely square your Merc (so he is naturally un-generous to your speaking/thinking style - but it is loose);

Other 45's are there within 2 degree orb:

-your Ven 45 his Moon;
-the Sun's mutually 45;
-Mars' mutually 45; and
-your Moon 135 his Sun.


If your Sat 45 his Sun is not the answer to your question (why you stickily indulge in reunions), then maybe it is just because his natal chart is so darn healthy (only 1 scratchy aspect out of 20-ish within 4 degrees - Ven 45 Pluto).
 

Honeybee90

Active member
Thank you. I think you may be on to something about the saturn-sun aspect. I didn't think of it before as a major aspect (new to astrology) however it may be the main issue because when we break apart he says there's a resistance he'll feel-i just kind of assumed it was all of his Sagittarius influence-but he's never dated anyone else even when we are on breaks. I do take him back easily because i'm never really angry with him I just can't stay upset with him there's too much of a loving or easy pull/feeling.

If there is this synastry resistance is there also an equal pull?- I find it so confusing why he teeter-totters so much!

He does have a much more rounded chart than me as well, I'm still trying to figure out all of my awful natal moon squares and their influences.
 

Marinka

Well-known member
Your question asked for more information about your Saturn-Neptune conjunction ... maybe a better question would be is what is transiting Pluto doing to the natal Sat-Nep conjunction ....
 

rahu

Banned
oh oh

i probably should not add my 2 cents because i see a lot of problems, but you asked...

first off the composite shows very selfish people involved in this relationship. this is a chart of a hot hook up but it has virtually no chance of becoming a committed relationship.

the moon is opposed to orcus and square to pluto so there is no real sincere emotional communication. there are emotional issues that preclude trust.

eris is squar eto venus. this shows a very magnetic and sexual chemistry between you. as it is venus,it tends to shpw you can't get eough of him.though this can show up as love and sex, inreality the love is possessive ad jealous love and will nto translatwe into health emotional commitment.th emoonis squar eto vesta so you have a sens eof devotion for him but the raws phyusical attraction is really what is happening.iot may be that you need to feel "devoted" before you can let ypourself go for someone.

mars is conjuct ixion and squar to the vertex. this marks him as not wanting a ommitment at all. and i don't think it acts like it or tells your lies.
he is independent and "raw" and that is what he is.this canshow he is a bit of a "bad boy" and with nessus square to the sun, you seem to be drawn to this type of guy anyway.
satrun is conjunct to uranus whic is the ultimate non commital aspect. the best this can do is to become a off and on back and forth relationship.
the sexual chemsitry is certinly strong enough g=for this to continue but with neptune / juno/ saturn you have ideas that this relationship could turn into soemething solid. but it is self delusion if you seriously think he will come around.

i think it was hot and heavy in feb of this year but it will only get colder in the near future. actually i think it is already over

rahu
 

Honeybee90

Active member
oh oh

i probably should not add my 2 cents because i see a lot of problems, but you asked...

first off the composite shows very selfish people involved in this relationship. this is a chart of a hot hook up but it has virtually no chance of becoming a committed relationship.

the moon is opposed to orcus and square to pluto so there is no real sincere emotional communication. there are emotional issues that preclude trust.

eris is squar eto venus. this shows a very magnetic and sexual chemistry between you. as it is venus,it tends to shpw you can't get eough of him.though this can show up as love and sex, inreality the love is possessive ad jealous love and will nto translatwe into health emotional commitment.th emoonis squar eto vesta so you have a sens eof devotion for him but the raws phyusical attraction is really what is happening.iot may be that you need to feel "devoted" before you can let ypourself go for someone.

mars is conjuct ixion and squar to the vertex. this marks him as not wanting a ommitment at all. and i don't think it acts like it or tells your lies.
he is independent and "raw" and that is what he is.this canshow he is a bit of a "bad boy" and with nessus square to the sun, you seem to be drawn to this type of guy anyway.
satrun is conjunct to uranus whic is the ultimate non commital aspect. the best this can do is to become a off and on back and forth relationship.
the sexual chemsitry is certinly strong enough g=for this to continue but with neptune / juno/ saturn you have ideas that this relationship could turn into soemething solid. but it is self delusion if you seriously think he will come around.

i think it was hot and heavy in feb of this year but it will only get colder in the near future. actually i think it is already over

rahu
Well first, ouch. Thank you for pointing some things out. Some doesn't quite gel-like the bad boy thing, he's really not. he's also very giving and loving..and we treat each other with care. But those Commitment aspects you mentioned seem significant. i certainly want to learn more about this Nessus aspect too.
 

Honeybee90

Active member
I was searching for answers and discovered my old posts.
I did end up giving him space but then...I welcomed back into my heart again. We ended up having a child and that gift is the light of my life.
This year the echo of our past cycle returned and he left me and went straight to his Ex. No time to reconcile, no making it work he just went straight to her.
I feel betrayed and hurt. But I know I should try to work towards acceptance.
There is a new guy who wants to be in my life but it is hard to let the father of my child go. No matter how hard I want to be able to let him go I always feel bound to him.

But this thread was a good reminder that he may always be out of reach even after years together he wasn't able to stay or work things out.
Now for hopes for healing!
 

curiousabout77

Well-known member
Your 7th house ruler is in the 3rd house so you need to relate and feel close to someone through the meeting of minds, especially since it is venus. Where as his 7th house ruler is in the 8th house conjunct pluto and it is mercury. This would mean that his mind would be deep but past experiences would deeply affect him so he wouldn't be open to communicating like you are and would be more likely to keep things to himself. His Mercury is in your twelveth house and your venus is in his twelveth house so you may find communicating with him hurtful at times. So you two would need to work at it to make it work. Also, very few of your personal planets link with his which makes it harder but you do have many planets in his eleventh house of friendship so you could work well as friends if you work at it.
 
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Honeybee90

Active member
Your 7th house ruler is in the 3rd house so you need to relate and feel close to someone through the meeting of minds, especially since it is venus. Where as his 7th house ruler is in the 8th house conjunct pluto and it is mercury. This would mean that his mind would be deep but past experiences would deeply affect him so he wouldn't be open to communicating like you are and would be more likely to keep things to himself. His Mercury is in your twelveth house and your venus is in his twelveth house so you may find communicating with him hurtful at times. So you two would need to work at it to make it work. Also, very few of your personal planets link with his which makes it harder but you do have many planets in his eleventh house of friendship so you could work well as friends if you work at it.

Thank you. The communication is the struggle he can misunderstand my intentions a lot. Sometimes he reacts harshly even if my intentions were light. I've reflected on our composite more and the Neptune influences I think really didn't help us out. He seemed like a piece of my spirit and my home but then so easily breaks my heart. The letting go aspect I believe is more difficult because the Neptune haze.

Co Parenting is going to require a reallllly big improvement of our communication.
 
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