ImNotThere9
Well-known member
So. It seems that for years now I've been having one relationship after another successively but nothing has quite stuck. I can say in perfect honesty that this is the bane of my existence! it's intolerable to me. One has just ended, and this time last year another more serious relationship ended after the young woman I was with proved unfaithful, and callously. This caused hurt, as you can imagine, and I've been instinctively more guarded since (to a point that might have alienated the girl I was last with). So my question is: what's going on here? It feels like nothing short of punishment, to have to endure the same cycle of break-up, low spirits (work, everything else then suffers), and then the balance slowly reasserts itself and I'm off on my romantic little pilgrimage again - to the same result, apparently.
I'm thinking of that line by W.H. Auden: 'Every young man fears / That he is not worth loving.' I mentioned the infidelity above. That profoundly affected me in ways I didn't understand at the time. I cut contact with her entirely, had two lousy one night stands, and jumped foolishly into another relationship that ended sourly because we were not suited. So for almost nine months I saw no one, withdrew from dating altogether, until I met the girl whom I was most recently with.
I'm aware of the potential mirroring, and the (potentially excessive) desire for relationships that results from Venus conjunct DC, and also its added strength as chart ruler.
Help would be much appreciated.
INT
P.S. If you would keep from quoting the above in your posts (I may want to take it down for personal reasons when it ages) that would be appreciated too
I'm thinking of that line by W.H. Auden: 'Every young man fears / That he is not worth loving.' I mentioned the infidelity above. That profoundly affected me in ways I didn't understand at the time. I cut contact with her entirely, had two lousy one night stands, and jumped foolishly into another relationship that ended sourly because we were not suited. So for almost nine months I saw no one, withdrew from dating altogether, until I met the girl whom I was most recently with.
I'm aware of the potential mirroring, and the (potentially excessive) desire for relationships that results from Venus conjunct DC, and also its added strength as chart ruler.
Help would be much appreciated.
INT
P.S. If you would keep from quoting the above in your posts (I may want to take it down for personal reasons when it ages) that would be appreciated too
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