I've no idea what's wrong with my natal chart and transits, but ever since I've been able to remember, there was something preventing me of having a satisfactory circle of friends or a happy personal relationship.
I'm the only child and since my childhood I've learned to play by myself. There were relatives frequently playing with me, and some friends too. Anyhow, it was always me inviting them to come over, to go somewhere and do something together. When I was in high school a group of friends would come to my house and I'd almost never go to theirs. At university, it wasn't any better. After it, even worse.
Now when I've been employed for 7 years, I've tried to make friends at work, and it was still me to initiate every contact with a very few young colleagues I have. I'm almost 33 and I am not deluding myself that I could have a large circle of friends to go out with and party. I'm not craving that, just someone whom I could occasionally see and confide in. Most of my former friends have either got married or moved in with their bfs and forgot about me.
Girls in my smallish town don't take up many activities together. Guys take up sports or go to watch games together.
I'm not confident about the relationship I'm in either. I love my boyfriend, but he has numerous problems. He thinks he's still very young and he acts immaturely, only cares for football, beer and going out with his friends (which he cannot really have/afford, plus his friends let him down many times and still he ran after them and neglected me, but thank God, that has changed to some degree since he realised they weren't that great as he had thought). This is a hard period for him, his dad has recently died, he doesn't have a job or income, he's lost. And I'm drowning with him, I mean psychologically. I want to settle down, but it's impossible now due to circumstances. I'm under stress every day. Many questions run through my mind - what to do with my salary? how to save it and what on? where will I live in the future? Will I ever have children? Will I ever make my parents happy by giving them grandchildren? How long can my biological clock work?Last month my mom wasn't feeling well, and when she went to doc he asked her if she was worrying about something and she said that she's worried cause she can't get me married. Knowing that only adds to the pressure I feel, but I can't really tell her how my bf is now and break her heart. I wish something magically changed. All my relatives and acquaintances have husbands and children or a nice circle of friends to support them, only I'm going crazy with not knowing what to do or what I'll end up with.
Thank you for reading this. Any advice and reading is welcome.
The attached chart are mine with transits and my bfs. I'm the female Taurus.
I'm the only child and since my childhood I've learned to play by myself. There were relatives frequently playing with me, and some friends too. Anyhow, it was always me inviting them to come over, to go somewhere and do something together. When I was in high school a group of friends would come to my house and I'd almost never go to theirs. At university, it wasn't any better. After it, even worse.
Now when I've been employed for 7 years, I've tried to make friends at work, and it was still me to initiate every contact with a very few young colleagues I have. I'm almost 33 and I am not deluding myself that I could have a large circle of friends to go out with and party. I'm not craving that, just someone whom I could occasionally see and confide in. Most of my former friends have either got married or moved in with their bfs and forgot about me.
Girls in my smallish town don't take up many activities together. Guys take up sports or go to watch games together.
I'm not confident about the relationship I'm in either. I love my boyfriend, but he has numerous problems. He thinks he's still very young and he acts immaturely, only cares for football, beer and going out with his friends (which he cannot really have/afford, plus his friends let him down many times and still he ran after them and neglected me, but thank God, that has changed to some degree since he realised they weren't that great as he had thought). This is a hard period for him, his dad has recently died, he doesn't have a job or income, he's lost. And I'm drowning with him, I mean psychologically. I want to settle down, but it's impossible now due to circumstances. I'm under stress every day. Many questions run through my mind - what to do with my salary? how to save it and what on? where will I live in the future? Will I ever have children? Will I ever make my parents happy by giving them grandchildren? How long can my biological clock work?Last month my mom wasn't feeling well, and when she went to doc he asked her if she was worrying about something and she said that she's worried cause she can't get me married. Knowing that only adds to the pressure I feel, but I can't really tell her how my bf is now and break her heart. I wish something magically changed. All my relatives and acquaintances have husbands and children or a nice circle of friends to support them, only I'm going crazy with not knowing what to do or what I'll end up with.
Thank you for reading this. Any advice and reading is welcome.
The attached chart are mine with transits and my bfs. I'm the female Taurus.
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