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  #1  
Unread 10-25-2017, 11:46 AM
Govind Govind is offline
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I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

I'm 29 years old and have never really been in a real relationship. I have a good job, have a decent personality and sense of humour too (I'm a comedian) but I just can't seem to get a girl. This frustrates me to no end.

When I was in my early to mid 20s I used to shrug this problem off thinking that things would work out for me when I got older. But now I'm almost 30 and recently got rejected by another girl and have no one in sight. This is all while all my friends are getting married.

I see that I have ascendant capricorn which might make it hard for me to get in a relationship. I also have venus in the 8th and pluto venus square means I go after the wrong girls that are not interested in me.

What are my blockages and when if ever will I ever meet someone that I can be in a relationship with?

Any help would be much appreciated.
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  #2  
Unread 10-26-2017, 04:14 AM
PRocker PRocker is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

I honestly don't know man. Your chart looks awesome, way better than mine. Only thing I can think of is Neptune, Saturn and Uranus conjunction the AC?

Uranus conjunct the Asc gives you an unique maybe somewhat quirky look? Saturn conjunct the Cap ASC could make you come off super boring or predictable? Anywho, just keep at it and the time will come bro 29 is young, something could be heading your way with Jupiter orbiting the 7th

Last edited by PRocker; 10-26-2017 at 04:17 AM.
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  #3  
Unread 10-26-2017, 07:49 AM
strns strns is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

chiron in the 7th house looks like it could be the verdict. chiron has to do with your biggest wound, can be an unhealable wound.

i like to think of the house or sign as a glass bottle that you keep putting your water (energy/effort) in, but thereís a crack (chiron) in the bottle so the water (energy) youíre putting in is escaping right away. you have to fix the crack before you can continue putting watter in the bottle.
so basically you have to heal yourself first, although since itís the 7th house it could mean someone else needs to heal you.

definitely research it though, i have little personal experience and/or knowledge on chiron.
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Unread 10-26-2017, 07:56 AM
katydid katydid is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

I am a little worried about the Uranus/Neptune, sandwiching your Ascendant.
And the Chiron in Cancer in your 7th of relationships.


I think the Uranus may make you come on a little too strong. You might not be too self aware and are not seeing how you come across to others.

Uranus on the Ascendant likes to put on a show and be funny and demonstrative. But that is not usually what potential partners are looking for.

Your 7th house, with Cancer on the cups, and Chiron, the wounded healer inside, describes an ultra sensitive soul, who may be deeply insecure and uncertain about how to relate intimately and emotionally. It usually brings pain and makes you both feel awkward?

Your Venus in Leo, opposing the Aquarian Moon, urges you to try and go for super attractive, confident women, as a way to feel better about yourself at times?

That Moon/Venus/Pluto T-Square is an internalised conflict, that may leak out to others when you feel stressed in social situations. I have seen that same T-square combination in people who blurt out inappropriate sexual remarks when they are nervous, or trying to act cool.

There are plenty of women who would want to date you. You need to find someone to help you meet the right women. You do not need a supermodel.

Last edited by katydid; 10-26-2017 at 08:00 AM.
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  #5  
Unread 10-26-2017, 11:48 AM
Govind Govind is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by katydid View Post
I am a little worried about the Uranus/Neptune, sandwiching your Ascendant.
And the Chiron in Cancer in your 7th of relationships.


I think the Uranus may make you come on a little too strong. You might not be too self aware and are not seeing how you come across to others.

Uranus on the Ascendant likes to put on a show and be funny and demonstrative. But that is not usually what potential partners are looking for.

Your 7th house, with Cancer on the cups, and Chiron, the wounded healer inside, describes an ultra sensitive soul, who may be deeply insecure and uncertain about how to relate intimately and emotionally. It usually brings pain and makes you both feel awkward?

Your Venus in Leo, opposing the Aquarian Moon, urges you to try and go for super attractive, confident women, as a way to feel better about yourself at times?

That Moon/Venus/Pluto T-Square is an internalised conflict, that may leak out to others when you feel stressed in social situations. I have seen that same T-square combination in people who blurt out inappropriate sexual remarks when they are nervous, or trying to act cool.

There are plenty of women who would want to date you. You need to find someone to help you meet the right women. You do not need a supermodel.
Wow. This is an incredible reading. Literally everything you said is true. I am a funny guy and am actually a stand up comedian. But i am prone to making innapropriate jokes at the wrong time and going in for an awkward kiss at the wrong time too.

I also have a habit of pursuing very attractive women who arent as attracted to me as I am to them.

But do i have any hope of finding someone? Is there any positives for me on the relationship front? Is anything hopefully on the horizon for me?

Last edited by Govind; 10-26-2017 at 11:54 AM.
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  #6  
Unread 10-26-2017, 08:36 PM
katydid katydid is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

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Originally Posted by Govind View Post
Wow. This is an incredible reading. Literally everything you said is true. I am a funny guy and am actually a stand up comedian. But i am prone to making innapropriate jokes at the wrong time and going in for an awkward kiss at the wrong time too.

I also have a habit of pursuing very attractive women who arent as attracted to me as I am to them.

But do i have any hope of finding someone? Is there any positives for me on the relationship front? Is anything hopefully on the horizon for me?
Yes, it is entirely possible for you to have a fulfilling relationship. But it will take some work on your part.

Do you have any close friends who can be honest with you? Preferably women friends. You need someone to go with you to a social scene, and 'criticize' and 'teach' you how to meet women in a positive way.

Women do not want you to be loud and gregarious and funny. Subtle, optimistic humor is nice. But not 'stand up' type jokes while meeting someone new. It seems forced and 'un-sexy.'

Women want intimacy. You may need help learning to be personal and intimate. The best thing would be to hire a 'dating coach' or matching professional, who could help you with a personal makeover. You need to relearn how to relate with women, one on one.

Uranus will just scare them away in droves.

Also. you must look more closely into why you are so interested in super attractive women. If you have never had a relationship, why try to pick the highest hanging fruit?

Why not begin with low hanging , ripe fruit? Look for other people who are inexperienced, like yourself. Once you gain some expertise then you can upgrade?
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Unread 10-26-2017, 09:30 PM
Govind Govind is offline
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Originally Posted by katydid View Post
Yes, it is entirely possible for you to have a fulfilling relationship. But it will take some work on your part.

Do you have any close friends who can be honest with you? Preferably women friends. You need someone to go with you to a social scene, and 'criticize' and 'teach' you how to meet women in a positive way.

Women do not want you to be loud and gregarious and funny. Subtle, optimistic humor is nice. But not 'stand up' type jokes while meeting someone new. It seems forced and 'un-sexy.'

Women want intimacy. You may need help learning to be personal and intimate. The best thing would be to hire a 'dating coach' or matching professional, who could help you with a personal makeover. You need to relearn how to relate with women, one on one.

Uranus will just scare them away in droves.

Also. you must look more closely into why you are so interested in super attractive women. If you have never had a relationship, why try to pick the highest hanging fruit?

Why not begin with low hanging , ripe fruit? Look for other people who are inexperienced, like yourself. Once you gain some expertise then you can upgrade?
Thanks for the advice. I need tp improve on some things for sure but I dont think I am as bad as you are making it out to be. I can be quite charming with women.It is true that I sometimes do things like go in for the kiss at the wrong time or come on a little too strong, but I believe I can work on those things rather than needing a complete personality makeover haha. Hopefully anyway.

I am also very picky with women and only go for the most attractive. I might need to lower my expectations.

You've already given me so much great insight,but is it possible to look at my transits and see when I am likely to finally meet someone?
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  #8  
Unread 10-26-2017, 11:40 PM
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mdinaz mdinaz is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

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Originally Posted by Govind View Post
I'm 29 years old and have never really been in a real relationship. I have a good job, have a decent personality and sense of humour too (I'm a comedian) but I just can't seem to get a girl. This frustrates me to no end.

When I was in my early to mid 20s I used to shrug this problem off thinking that things would work out for me when I got older. But now I'm almost 30 and recently got rejected by another girl and have no one in sight. This is all while all my friends are getting married.

I see that I have ascendant capricorn which might make it hard for me to get in a relationship. I also have venus in the 8th and pluto venus square means I go after the wrong girls that are not interested in me.

What are my blockages and when if ever will I ever meet someone that I can be in a relationship with?

Any help would be much appreciated.
I see a couple issues.

Neptune on the ASC opposite Chiron in the 7th house - You have a tendency to misread cues from people and take emotional offense at slights that don't exist in reality. Your 7th house is your home of intimacy and intimate relationships, and looking across the horizon to the ASC, the outer world where other people initially come in. Because Neptune is there, you don't see them clearly, nor they you. This misreading of energy on both parties causes you to react in a negative way and internalize that emotional hurt.

Pluto square Moon very tight - Pluto is in Scorpio and square very tightly an Aquarius Moon. You mentioned elsewhere about making inappropriate comments at the wrong times, etc - and this can be reflected here. Your Aquarius Moon doesn't react emotionally in "accepted" ways that other people may respond, and with the square to Pluto, you then attempt to control the emotional climate of the moment, which NEVER works. Because Pluto is in the 11th house, this hits nearly every person you interact with in society.

Mars in the 4th square the ASC - because Mars is in Aries exactly conjunct the IC and in square the ASC, you don't come across as "bring home to mom" material. Whether it is because you come on too strong, because you attempt to control the emotional climate (and with Pluto in Scorpio, your Mars affects this), combined with the easily hurt Chiron in the 7th, you likely drive prospective partners away in this manner. Mars is also in hard square to Neptune, so there may be likely issues with drugs/alcohol also. Being a stand up comedian, you are surrounded by that sort of atmosphere. Because of your Neptune/Chiron placement, you absorb the negativity of others very easily. Being in a night club, there is a LOT of negativity there, even when the place is empty. Those kinds of places absorb it and sensitive people like you will feel it, even if you don't realize it.

Saturn square Sun on MC - a perpetual dark cloud. Sun is also in a very chaotic degree. Once in a rut, it's hard to get out.

Because of these negative aspects, you'll really have to play up the positive ones. The humor comes from the Mercury/Uranus sextile and Aquarius Moon, which gives you a super-fast mind, essential for comedy. Moon is sextile Mars - perhaps more time spent in energetic pursuits (sports, hiking, etc) will translate that negative emotional energy and vent it through physical activity. Jupiter is trine moon in the 6th and tight sextile Mars - find someplace you can serve others, perhaps using your comedy - maybe helping kids through humor.

I need to see some other points in the chart you don't have, but generally you need to deflect the negative energy into other areas of your life. If you smoke and drink, stop. Hard to do when you are in a smoky club all night, I know. You'll also have to work harder and not being "on stage" all the time. When you leave the club, leave the comedian behind. Being a comedian should be what you "do", not what you "are".

As for some of your other comments, Uranus on the ASC can give great charisma, also essential for someone who performs on stage, especially one who performs alone. But Saturn is there too in the same spot -don't take yourself too seriously, and don't assume the worst about other people, or about yourself. You don't need to lower your expectations, you need to raise your expectations about yourself.
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  #9  
Unread 10-27-2017, 02:19 AM
Govind Govind is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mdinaz View Post
I see a couple issues.

Neptune on the ASC opposite Chiron in the 7th house - You have a tendency to misread cues from people and take emotional offense at slights that don't exist in reality. Your 7th house is your home of intimacy and intimate relationships, and looking across the horizon to the ASC, the outer world where other people initially come in. Because Neptune is there, you don't see them clearly, nor they you. This misreading of energy on both parties causes you to react in a negative way and internalize that emotional hurt.

Pluto square Moon very tight - Pluto is in Scorpio and square very tightly an Aquarius Moon. You mentioned elsewhere about making inappropriate comments at the wrong times, etc - and this can be reflected here. Your Aquarius Moon doesn't react emotionally in "accepted" ways that other people may respond, and with the square to Pluto, you then attempt to control the emotional climate of the moment, which NEVER works. Because Pluto is in the 11th house, this hits nearly every person you interact with in society.

Mars in the 4th square the ASC - because Mars is in Aries exactly conjunct the IC and in square the ASC, you don't come across as "bring home to mom" material. Whether it is because you come on too strong, because you attempt to control the emotional climate (and with Pluto in Scorpio, your Mars affects this), combined with the easily hurt Chiron in the 7th, you likely drive prospective partners away in this manner. Mars is also in hard square to Neptune, so there may be likely issues with drugs/alcohol also. Being a stand up comedian, you are surrounded by that sort of atmosphere. Because of your Neptune/Chiron placement, you absorb the negativity of others very easily. Being in a night club, there is a LOT of negativity there, even when the place is empty. Those kinds of places absorb it and sensitive people like you will feel it, even if you don't realize it.

Saturn square Sun on MC - a perpetual dark cloud. Sun is also in a very chaotic degree. Once in a rut, it's hard to get out.

Because of these negative aspects, you'll really have to play up the positive ones. The humor comes from the Mercury/Uranus sextile and Aquarius Moon, which gives you a super-fast mind, essential for comedy. Moon is sextile Mars - perhaps more time spent in energetic pursuits (sports, hiking, etc) will translate that negative emotional energy and vent it through physical activity. Jupiter is trine moon in the 6th and tight sextile Mars - find someplace you can serve others, perhaps using your comedy - maybe helping kids through humor.

I need to see some other points in the chart you don't have, but generally you need to deflect the negative energy into other areas of your life. If you smoke and drink, stop. Hard to do when you are in a smoky club all night, I know. You'll also have to work harder and not being "on stage" all the time. When you leave the club, leave the comedian behind. Being a comedian should be what you "do", not what you "are".

As for some of your other comments, Uranus on the ASC can give great charisma, also essential for someone who performs on stage, especially one who performs alone. But Saturn is there too in the same spot -don't take yourself too seriously, and don't assume the worst about other people, or about yourself. You don't need to lower your expectations, you need to raise your expectations about yourself.
Thanks for this in depth analysis. A few points:

- yeah i agree about not being able to read if someone is interested in me or not. This often leads me to missing opportunities where they are in fact interested in me and going for girls that arent interested.im not sure what I can do about this but it is very frustrating.

- I have no alcohol or drug problems. I am also a very social person with a very good circle of friends. When i was younger i had a severe stutter and social anxiety which i have overcome.

- Self esteem has always been an issue for me and also being overly sensitive. This is something i am always working on.

- I hope through all these issues I will finally find someone to be in a relationship with. If there is any further detail I can provide in my chart for this reading please let me now it would ve much appreciated.

Last edited by Govind; 10-27-2017 at 02:25 AM.
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  #10  
Unread 10-27-2017, 10:09 AM
katydid katydid is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

The key seems to be to figure out a way to know which women are interested in you, and which are not.

You need a wing man or wing woman, to help you sort it out.
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  #11  
Unread 10-27-2017, 07:28 PM
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mdinaz mdinaz is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

Quote:
Originally Posted by Govind View Post
- yeah i agree about not being able to read if someone is interested in me or not. This often leads me to missing opportunities where they are in fact interested in me and going for girls that arent interested.im not sure what I can do about this but it is very frustrating.
Well all my previous advice stands. Sounds like you also could use in a crash course in reading body language.

If someone is interested in you, they'll maintain eye contact. If they're scanning the room while talking to you or constantly trying to pay attention to another conversation they're not apart of, walk away. Do they stand with their body facing you while talking or do they stand at an angle? Standing at an angle is an indication they want to get away. Someone who sits by you but their legs are constantly moving also want to get away. Women who are REALLY interested may play with their hair, study your face closely while talking, or touch your arm. If you are walking together, they'll bump into you a lot. If striking up a conversation, listen for conversation enders - like when you are on the phone and somebody wants to hang up. Also, if they bring up another guy's name or presence almost immediately in the conversation, that's a clue you're wasting your time. If they use their friends for cover, that's another clue.

Quote:
- I have no alcohol or drug problems. I am also a very social person with a very good circle of friends. When i was younger i had a severe stutter and social anxiety which i have overcome.
That's the Pluto in the 11th and square Moon. Pluto, especially when in aspect to personal planets, is about control (or lack thereof). Stutters, shaking, nervousness are all about lack of control. Parkinson's disease is about lack of control, as well as other auto-immune diseases. Having an Aquarius moon and Uranus on the ASC will make you naturally charismatic without any effort. Being a performer you'll have friends regardless. But that is irrelevant when it comes to intimate relationships, which operate at a different level.

Quote:
- Self esteem has always been an issue for me and also being overly sensitive. This is something i am always working on.
The Chiron in the 7th house is evidence of that for you, as well as the Neptune aspects. This sensitivity helps in your comedy as you can tune into the needs of the audience, but if you are over sensitive you take negative feedback too harshly.


Quote:
- I hope through all these issues I will finally find someone to be in a relationship with. If there is any further detail I can provide in my chart for this reading please let me now it would ve much appreciated.
We can try another chart but this time add the four asteroids (pallas, ceres, vesta, juno), plus the Vertex.
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  #12  
Unread 10-29-2017, 05:23 AM
Govind Govind is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

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Originally Posted by mdinaz View Post
Well all my previous advice stands. Sounds like you also could use in a crash course in reading body language.

If someone is interested in you, they'll maintain eye contact. If they're scanning the room while talking to you or constantly trying to pay attention to another conversation they're not apart of, walk away. Do they stand with their body facing you while talking or do they stand at an angle? Standing at an angle is an indication they want to get away. Someone who sits by you but their legs are constantly moving also want to get away. Women who are REALLY interested may play with their hair, study your face closely while talking, or touch your arm. If you are walking together, they'll bump into you a lot. If striking up a conversation, listen for conversation enders - like when you are on the phone and somebody wants to hang up. Also, if they bring up another guy's name or presence almost immediately in the conversation, that's a clue you're wasting your time. If they use their friends for cover, that's another clue.

We can try another chart but this time add the four asteroids (pallas, ceres, vesta, juno), plus the Vertex.
This is all great advice and I agree with all of it. But I don't want to make it out like I am completely inept at this. I would be surprised if my chart shows that I am. I have been on a lot of dates (with varying success) over the years and I am well versed in the importance of eye contact, touch, listening etc. I think my problem is more that I am very picky with women, and the women I do eventually pick are women that are not interested in me or that I somehow mess up before getting into the relationship stage by doing something a bit awkward (going for the kiss at the wrong time, telling them how I feel about them too early). Maybe its something that comes from a deep anxiety within me. I'm not sure.

I want to also add that I have made huge strides on this front. As I said before I struggled with severe social anxiety and a stutter up until my early 20s and I have since overcome this (I wonder if me overcoming these issues shows in my charts...) I think this is why I am quite underdeveloped and inexperienced in this whole dating thing. I've only really entered the dating world in the last 5 years or so.

I have attached my updated chart with the four asteroids and vertex. If you could provide any insight into when I can hope to expect a successful relationship that would be great.

Thanks again for your great advice and insight.
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  #13  
Unread 10-29-2017, 05:13 PM
HeartTree HeartTree is offline
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Makes me wonder what do you seek/want from relationship if you only date ladies who are highly attractive to you? Sounds very superficial way to try to find someone to share your life with. What about her to be caring, friendly, responsible, economical etc? You have better chance to find suitable partner just for you, mentally and sexually, if you date all kind of people.

It's not about lowering your expectations but widening your selection criterion.

Last edited by HeartTree; 10-29-2017 at 05:21 PM.
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Unread 10-29-2017, 05:46 PM
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mdinaz mdinaz is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

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Originally Posted by Govind View Post
This is all great advice and I agree with all of it. But I don't want to make it out like I am completely inept at this. I would be surprised if my chart shows that I am. I have been on a lot of dates (with varying success) over the years and I am well versed in the importance of eye contact, touch, listening etc. I think my problem is more that I am very picky with women, and the women I do eventually pick are women that are not interested in me or that I somehow mess up before getting into the relationship stage by doing something a bit awkward (going for the kiss at the wrong time, telling them how I feel about them too early). Maybe its something that comes from a deep anxiety within me. I'm not sure.
If you were adept at reading body language and following hunches, you wouldn't be going for the kiss at the wrong time or having some other awkward moment. If the woman was into the idea, there would not be a wrong time.

Vesta is on the MC conjunct Sun and opposite Mars and square Neptune and Chiron. It only reinforces what I said earlier. Expectations are beliefs, and beliefs are what shape our reality. You get what you believe. It's not that your desires are too high, or you are too picky. It's that what you expect to happen is too negative. There is a very negative feedback cycle here between all these planets - the negative expectations you have will manifest very readily due to the amount of momentum they've had over the years. You can only change that momentum by expecting positive results to your efforts. If this means focusing on other things (like I suggested), then do that. I think that if you lower expectations and choose women who you really don't desire but think you'll get a better result, you will only create the situation where you end up resenting the women you DO get because it isn't what you want. That will not help you at all and reinforce the negative feed back cycle. Ceres is opposite the sun and Vertex and will likely blow up in your face.

I still think the original advice I gave you is the best route. You need to focus your energy elsewhere in the meantime and let the subject drop. When you get back into the arena, follow your hunches. If you aren't sure about approaching someone, then she's not the one to approach. When it's the right one there will be no question about it. As Abraham-Hicks says, "if it ain't a hell yes, it's a hell no". There's nothing wrong with being picky, the Universe will find the right one for you, but let your intuition that you already have direct you in the right direction. Being unsure is the hunch that says "not here". And when the hunch leads you to one where the energy is lined up, you'll know it and there will be no awkwardness. If there is awkwardness or forced energy, you're in the wrong place.
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Unread 10-29-2017, 05:55 PM
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

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Originally Posted by strns View Post
chiron in the 7th house looks like it could be the verdict. chiron has to do with your biggest wound, can be an unhealable wound.

i like to think of the house or sign as a glass bottle that you keep putting your water (energy/effort) in, but there’s a crack (chiron) in the bottle so the water (energy) you’re putting in is escaping right away. you have to fix the crack before you can continue putting watter in the bottle.
so basically you have to heal yourself first, although since it’s the 7th house it could mean someone else needs to heal you.

definitely research it though, i have little personal experience and/or knowledge on chiron.
That diagnosis is the same as what I was going to write: its Chiron on the Descendant. I just did a search to see if anyone else said it.

Chiron is ultra tricky. I have him on my SN in my first house.
Aggressive sexual healing man. Get out there and disregard norms. You may end up with the hottest woman in India due to Chiron, but you wont meet her at work.
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Unread 10-29-2017, 06:06 PM
VirgoSun1978 VirgoSun1978 is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

Well my friend, I am sorry to say this, but it appears that you have been cursed by the gods. There is no easy way of putting it. This is a very difficult chart for relationships. Venus/Pluto is what I call the "bad girl" aspect. Potential partners could be very manipulative, promiscuous, and deceitful. Venus in the 8th is a bad placement also. Venus in Leo opposed the Moon in Aquarius could indicate a materialistic woman that is in constant need of attention, emotionally erratic, and uncomfortable with her femininity. The T square involving Pluto could lead to a very dark sexuality, or prostitution. The femme fatale, or black widow type of woman.

There is much negative potential here, but it is not hopeless. I would recommend looking into astrological remedies that are common in Vedic astrology, or some type of shamanic ritual involving candles and gemstones or metals that are ruled by the Moon, Venus, and Pluto.

When looking for a potential partner be very careful and try to find one that embodies the higher octaves of the Venus/Pluto archetype. Perhaps a woman that is interested in psychology, shamanism, or some kind of erotic/eccentric artist. Read about the mythology of Persephone. Good luck.
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Unread 10-29-2017, 06:44 PM
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

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Originally Posted by Govind View Post
This is all great advice and I agree with all of it. But I don't want to make it out like I am completely inept at this. I would be surprised if my chart shows that I am. I have been on a lot of dates (with varying success) over the years and I am well versed in the importance of eye contact, touch, listening etc. I think my problem is more that I am very picky with women, and the women I do eventually pick are women that are not interested in me or that I somehow mess up before getting into the relationship stage by doing something a bit awkward (going for the kiss at the wrong time, telling them how I feel about them too early). Maybe its something that comes from a deep anxiety within me. I'm not sure.

I want to also add that I have made huge strides on this front. As I said before I struggled with severe social anxiety and a stutter up until my early 20s and I have since overcome this (I wonder if me overcoming these issues shows in my charts...) I think this is why I am quite underdeveloped and inexperienced in this whole dating thing. I've only really entered the dating world in the last 5 years or so.

I have attached my updated chart with the four asteroids and vertex. If you could provide any insight into when I can hope to expect a successful relationship that would be great.

Thanks again for your great advice and insight.
I'm no expert in this area of astrology but perhaps your high degree Virgo sun makes you a rather critical person that's after the perfect partner, particularly in regards to their appearance and body, maybe you have very high standards of what you want...which can be a good thing but makes it harder in the long run to solidify a relationship and settle for one of longevity and so fourth.

Peace fellow StarLovers.
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  #18  
Unread 10-29-2017, 06:53 PM
galileogirl galileogirl is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

Perhaps you're too critical and looking for perfection? I've noticed that men with moon in aquarius aren't the most sensitive people. And you have mars in your fourth house which can often be that you're suddenly angry out of the blue. You've got venus in Leo which is loving but you need adoration. I think that you're going to have to spend some time figuring out who you are and now is no time for you to try to start a relationship with Pluto going through your first house. (I'm having the same thing right now). The key is to NOT be hard on YOURSELF and have no expectations. Roll with the flow and let spirit bring the right person to you. Start a ritual in the morning when you get up asking that the Goddess bless you and allow you to receive her gifts. And then have no attachment.
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Unread 10-29-2017, 10:48 PM
Govind Govind is offline
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Originally Posted by VirgoSun1978 View Post
Well my friend, I am sorry to say this, but it appears that you have been cursed by the gods. There is no easy way of putting it. This is a very difficult chart for relationships. Venus/Pluto is what I call the "bad girl" aspect. Potential partners could be very manipulative, promiscuous, and deceitful. Venus in the 8th is a bad placement also. Venus in Leo opposed the Moon in Aquarius could indicate a materialistic woman that is in constant need of attention, emotionally erratic, and uncomfortable with her femininity. The T square involving Pluto could lead to a very dark sexuality, or prostitution. The femme fatale, or black widow type of woman.

There is much negative potential here, but it is not hopeless. I would recommend looking into astrological remedies that are common in Vedic astrology, or some type of shamanic ritual involving candles and gemstones or metals that are ruled by the Moon, Venus, and Pluto.

When looking for a potential partner be very careful and try to find one that embodies the higher octaves of the Venus/Pluto archetype. Perhaps a woman that is interested in psychology, shamanism, or some kind of erotic/eccentric artist. Read about the mythology of Persephone. Good luck.
Geez this one was tough to read haha but thanks for your honesty it is what I've been looking for.

I'm trying to think of all the women I've pursued in the past. There were one or two that were quite emotionally manipulative but nothing to the extent that you have described. That dark sexuality stuff scares me and I stay far away from it. But maybe I have these sort of dark relationships to look forward to... Yaay.

The last woman I was involved with was a good girl, professional who she admits there was a definite attraction but broke it off early because we live in diffeeent states and she wasnt willing to do long distance. There didnt appear to be anything overly sinister going on here.

I wonder if it shows in my chart whether I'm destined to be alone or destined to be constantly pursuing the wrong type of women. Based on what I've read its not looking good...

Btw trying to find someone that is into shamanism and erotic art... I didnt know these people exist haha!

All this negativity makes me want to ask are there any positive aspects in my chart at all haha???

Last edited by Govind; 10-29-2017 at 11:04 PM.
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  #20  
Unread 10-29-2017, 10:57 PM
Govind Govind is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mdinaz View Post
If you were adept at reading body language and following hunches, you wouldn't be going for the kiss at the wrong time or having some other awkward moment. If the woman was into the idea, there would not be a wrong time.

Vesta is on the MC conjunct Sun and opposite Mars and square Neptune and Chiron. It only reinforces what I said earlier. Expectations are beliefs, and beliefs are what shape our reality. You get what you believe. It's not that your desires are too high, or you are too picky. It's that what you expect to happen is too negative. There is a very negative feedback cycle here between all these planets - the negative expectations you have will manifest very readily due to the amount of momentum they've had over the years. You can only change that momentum by expecting positive results to your efforts. If this means focusing on other things (like I suggested), then do that. I think that if you lower expectations and choose women who you really don't desire but think you'll get a better result, you will only create the situation where you end up resenting the women you DO get because it isn't what you want. That will not help you at all and reinforce the negative feed back cycle. Ceres is opposite the sun and Vertex and will likely blow up in your face.

I still think the original advice I gave you is the best route. You need to focus your energy elsewhere in the meantime and let the subject drop. When you get back into the arena, follow your hunches. If you aren't sure about approaching someone, then she's not the one to approach. When it's the right one there will be no question about it. As Abraham-Hicks says, "if it ain't a hell yes, it's a hell no". There's nothing wrong with being picky, the Universe will find the right one for you, but let your intuition that you already have direct you in the right direction. Being unsure is the hunch that says "not here". And when the hunch leads you to one where the energy is lined up, you'll know it and there will be no awkwardness. If there is awkwardness or forced energy, you're in the wrong place.
Fair points. I lack self awareness in romantic situations for sure. But if anything it is me being too confident rather than being too scared.

Again, up until my mid 20s I was a complete ball of anxiety. I would never approach a girl or even really consider dating. The only girls i would be interested in would be girls that would emotionally manipulate me and immediately 'friend zone'me. I had absolutely zero self belief and i honestly think its been miraculous how things have improved so much over the last 5 years.

My only hope is that like over the last few years how I have transformed myself from the scared, anxious guy to a confident, social guy who is only now really venturing into the dating world, that I have a chance of improving on the things that you have said I am not good at and I start seeing some results.

By the looks of some of the posts on this thread my chances may not look good. But I guess all I can really do is take some of the advice, not focus so much on relationships, and just hope for the best.

If you could provide any further insight into when if ever I'll meet someone based on my asteroid chart that would be much appreciated. But youve already helped so much so thanks regardless.

Last edited by Govind; 10-29-2017 at 11:03 PM.
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  #21  
Unread 10-30-2017, 12:12 AM
VirgoSun1978 VirgoSun1978 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Govind View Post
Geez this one was tough to read haha but thanks for your honesty it is what I've been looking for.

I'm trying to think of all the women I've pursued in the past. There were one or two that were quite emotionally manipulative but nothing to the extent that you have described. That dark sexuality stuff scares me and I stay far away from it. But maybe I have these sort of dark relationships to look forward to... Yaay.

The last woman I was involved with was a good girl, professional who she admits there was a definite attraction but broke it off early because we live in diffeeent states and she wasnt willing to do long distance. There didnt appear to be anything overly sinister going on here.

I wonder if it shows in my chart whether I'm destined to be alone or destined to be constantly pursuing the wrong type of women. Based on what I've read its not looking good...

Btw trying to find someone that is into shamanism and erotic art... I didnt know these people exist haha!

All this negativity makes me want to ask are there any positive aspects in my chart at all haha???
I do not see anything that indicates that you are destined to be alone. When transiting Saturn aspects your Moon (ruler of your 7th) and Venus (ruler of your 5th) may be times when there is potential for relationships. Here are some dates to look out for: 3/2021, 8/2021, 12/2021, and 2/2022.

I have Venus in my 9th seperating from Mars/Pluto in my 8th. When I met the mother of my child she was finishing up medical school and had a promising future ahead of her as a doctor. 4 months later she was pregnant with my daughter and I found out that she was a recovering alcoholic, drug addict, numerous psychological problems, and she had attempted suicide twice. After our daughter was born it didn't take long to see that she was a bad mother as well. She never found work as a doctor and I later found out that she was cheating on me. I filed for custody 3 years ago and have been in court fighting ever since. I finally got my daughter away from her a year ago after my ex attempted suicide for the 3rd time. That is an example of a Venus/Pluto type of woman. Needless to say, I now enjoy the single life lol.

You do have good things in your chart like Moon trine Jupiter, Mars sextile Jupiter, and Mercury sextile Saturn and Uranus. Google these aspects for more info. Even the squares in your chart which tend to be problematic could potentially turn out positive. It all depends on the choices you make and if you learn the lessons that they have to teach. Alchemy is the process of turning lead into gold, metaphorically speaking. That is what we do when we apply astrological knowledge into our lives by channeling these influences with our decisions and actions.
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Unread 10-30-2017, 09:52 AM
blacksun? blacksun? is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

Your 1st and 7th houses are in Capricorn and Cancer, and they're marked by an opposition, so you will be required to fuse these two signs into their proper axial meaning to attain to the capacity to function as yourself within a relationship.

This opposition is a generational one, the planets involved are of a highly "spiritual" nature, meaning induction-prone, not relying on the past or precedent but on whats possible into the future. In short, you'll have to "become someone" in the scheme of things. Lol, just occurs to me maybe you can replace the void in Hollywood thats going to be left when all the perverts have been kicked out.

I dont even know who be doing to the kicking out in the end. You, maybe.
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Unread 10-30-2017, 05:13 PM
blacksun? blacksun? is offline
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Re: I'm 29 and can't get into a relationship

Quote:
Originally Posted by VirgoSun1978 View Post
Alchemy is the process of turning lead into gold, metaphorically speaking. That is what we do when we apply astrological knowledge into our lives by channeling these influences with our decisions and actions.
Well said.
The fusing of opposite signs into an axial understanding is alchemical in this sense.
In Kabbalah this is called path working, we merge two opposite spheres by walking or rather forging the path between it. I made a video on this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4z5PESmRo8
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Unread 10-31-2017, 12:19 PM
Govind Govind is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blacksun? View Post
Your 1st and 7th houses are in Capricorn and Cancer, and they're marked by an opposition, so you will be required to fuse these two signs into their proper axial meaning to attain to the capacity to function as yourself within a relationship.

This opposition is a generational one, the planets involved are of a highly "spiritual" nature, meaning induction-prone, not relying on the past or precedent but on whats possible into the future. In short, you'll have to "become someone" in the scheme of things. Lol, just occurs to me maybe you can replace the void in Hollywood thats going to be left when all the perverts have been kicked out.

I dont even know who be doing to the kicking out in the end. You, maybe.
This is very interesting but I'm sorry I dont understand what you mean. How should I go about fusing these two signs into their proper axial meaning?

Also not sure what you mean when you say i have to "become someone" to get into a relationship. Are you saying I must become famous to enter into a relationship haha? Sorry i might be taking your insight too literally.
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  #25  
Unread 10-31-2017, 02:34 PM
blacksun? blacksun? is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Govind View Post
This is very interesting but I'm sorry I dont understand what you mean. How should I go about fusing these two signs into their proper axial meaning?

Also not sure what you mean when you say i have to "become someone" to get into a relationship. Are you saying I must become famous to enter into a relationship haha? Sorry i might be taking your insight too literally.
Thats what alchemy means in the final instance (if youre not talking about some dude trying to actually turn lead into gold) ; to fuse, merge the disparate elements in oneself into a unity.

What this means for your case , Cap/Cancer, etc, meams getting in touch with the deepest meanings of these signs and the planets in them.

"Become someone in the scheme of things" - fame is not the issue but the meaning of your work. You may need to have something of an impact to know yourself, which would open your 7th house to you.
I dont mean geting your face on some magazine, and i dont mean to let yourself be used by a casting agent either - i mean to be of service to Mankind.

That axis rules a whole generation.
Look to the beginning of the Saturn year at Dec 21st.

Im advising you to get into "magic".
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