Good observation. I am a very wounded person and have been through a lot! The last 11 years have been hell! But I've grown and learned so much and overcame things that I literally thought would end up "doing me in." But yeah, trust issues, bigggg time. And it *****. Apart of me knows that I am kind of being really hard with this guy because so many people date a bunch of others before like committing to someone and falling in love. But my emotions or insecurity or horrible ego or whatever you want to honestly call it, like it is so intense with me when it comes to romantic connections that the thought of him even having a genuine connection with somebody else is enough for me to like run no matter how much potential I see in us. And it's immature. It *****. But that's how I am. But apart of me feels like I am making such a huge mistake! But I don't know. Ugh. And I also read that Jupiter is transiting my North Node and any major decisions I make will affect the rest of my life. And I don't know if this guy could be like someone who can be really special in my future. Anyway, sorry for ranting.Venus square Ur/Nep is rather weak by orb in your chart. I'd also make sure to take a look at the Angular Leo Mars conjunct Chiron.