Am I obsessed over nothing or am I supposed to help him somehow?

zipadee

Well-known member
Hi, I'm very new (this is the first astrology forum I've joined), love astrology and hope to one day permeate the secret dimensions behind the planets, stars and psyche as many of you do. But for now, my knowledge is pretty limited beyond rulers of planets and such...soooo, I'm a learner, but would like to ask for any help you can offer on synastry between me and one special dude.

So...this guy and I haven't seen each other for about 4 years. We both were really interested in each other but due to another "friend's" meddling and the difficulty of communication/trust between the two of us, he perceived that I hated him and went all vengeful on me.

He very much expresses the stellium Scorpio shown in his chart, it's what I believe attracted me to him in the first place. I've never met anyone like him and consider him one of the important people in my life, right behind my family (despite the fact we only talked over the course of not even a year).

Over these years he's very much been the Phoenix falling to ashes, I believe that he is capable of rising again. When I knew him he was pretty popular and funny, very much into the occult (we connected quickly over this) and all around a nice guy who flirted a lot and did tons of drugs. Since then he's been alienated from all of his friends, family and his career isn't looking good. I feel like if he could just have someone tell him hey, you're not that awful of a guy, he might do much better, but I digress.

A few months ago he popped into mind (while I was dating someone else), looked him up and sure enough he had recently gotten in trouble with the law (nothing super scary, but has me worried). Since then I think of him everyday #.# I've made efforts to contact him (he doesn't have social media stuff so pretty difficult), to no avail.

From what I've gathered, we've got some good chemistry transits but I haven't seen anything that's like aha! you've found "the one" or past life connection other than my north node/sun/(black moon lilith) conjunction conjunct his chiron.

Is the reason I'm obsessing so much over this now because I feel the need to help him?

Any help at all will be greatly appreciated, thank you so much ^-^

Also, sorry I don't have his time of birth, no ascendant/houses

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IleneK

Premium Member
Please put up three charts created at astro.com: your natal, his natal set for noon of his birth date, and the synastry chart with you in the middle.
 

zipadee

Well-known member
Thanks Ilene, sorry didn't check the post.

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katydid

Well-known member
He has Neptune exactly upon his ascendant. It squares his elevated Mercury.

Although you have Saturn squaring his Neptune, I don't think you are going to be able to help him much. His desire for drugs is all consuming. You would just be a stern/concerned voice trying to warn him against it.

You are very young. Going all in emotionally, with someone who is going down the wrong path, is not advisable. Your own natal Neptune is pretty afflicted. You might get pulled into the rabbit hole yourself. :bandit:
 

katydid

Well-known member
Also, look at his 7th house. Mars is there in Leo, squaring the Sun/Pluto. He does not seem like a very compassionate, caring partner. I see a lot of potential drama, anger and fighting ahead. :unsure:
 

IleneK

Premium Member
Also, look at his 7th house. Mars is there in Leo, squaring the Sun/Pluto. He does not seem like a very compassionate, caring partner. I see a lot of potential drama, anger and fighting ahead. :unsure:

Hi, K.
Just an FYI.
His birthtime is not known, so OP just cast the chart for noon at my suggestion.
 

IleneK

Premium Member
There is definitely a certain fatedness between you with his Saturn on your Desc/Moon. This is not anything particularly easy or even good. So I would be keenly aware of getting involved unless you are really sure, though, because with Saturn in your Moon, it means he may be very committed [and controlling] and it can be very hard to get out of the relationship if it is a bad one.
His Venus trine your Moon may incline you toward him, but I am not sure it is enough. And quite honestly, the two of you seem too much alike, both having so much Scorpio...?
 

zipadee

Well-known member
There is definitely a certain fatedness between you with his Saturn on your Desc/Moon. This is not anything particularly easy or even good. So I would be keenly aware of getting involved unless you are really sure, though, because with Saturn in your Moon, it means he may be very committed [and controlling] and it can be very hard to get out of the relationship if it is a bad one.
His Venus trine your Moon may incline you toward him, but I am not sure it is enough. And quite honestly, the two of you seem too much alike, both having so much Scorpio...?
Thanks Ilene,

Spot on, yea definitely accurate there, he activates that whole T square I've got going and I'm doubtful of if going after him is really a good idea long-term, like if he'd be the end of me/work against me, can't help but look back at memories and be fond of him though, it's hard for me to see him in a bad light.

We are really similar, I feel like he's one person I can relate to especially well, and believe he understands me better than most.
 

zipadee

Well-known member
Oh, thanks,that does change things!
Thank Katy,

I know I'm very young, recently got out of a bad relationship and my mom (who's pretty into astrology and study of the subconscious) is now convinced that "I'm attracted to psychopaths." I really don't like the idea of it and I'm now consciously trying to gear myself towards better people, but it's difficult when there's no chemistry or if there is, they're taken. Maybe just haven't met the right person, lol
 

rahu

Banned
hi zipadee

I agree with the others this relationship does not have a future.
to start off, Uranus and netpune are square the node. this though it shows a almost electric enchantment with each other and strong [psychic connections between, it totally unstable and once the intial excitement wears off,he would be gone.
to further emphacize there is not possibility he will change, the moon/sun midpoint is square the node and opposed to Uranus. this is the way it is....

there are many very affectionate aspects in the composite.
eros is square the vertex which shows a spontaneous attraction but more physical than emotional. The mars/venus midpoint is conjunct to mercury and opposed to eris , so Im sure he must have said he would loved you forever or some such . but in fact he only said that to get you in bed.

the node/eros midpoint is conjunct to eris and opposed to mercury. this is very sexual and emotional. it shows lively conversations but always with a undercurrent of sex.eris is extremely sexual but it is also not respectful of emotional intimacy or commitment. so the relationship was hot but again with no chance of becoming serious.

his duplicity is shown by the sun conjunct to pholous and opposed to Saturn and square to juno. this shows he likely said or did things that lead you to believe he was serious about you. but his words were false and he only said what you wanted to hear.

this is clear because the moon is opposed to Jupiter and square to pallas and vesta. this shows that you felt/believed that he was the one. he made you feel special and you felt a deep devotion growing for him but satrun opposed to sun and pholous show he was feeling deceptive , he had no real intention to become serious with you. but he said and acted like he did to get what he wanted from you

you might have had a idea he was not really in to you as you were to him.this is shown as the Venus/chiron conjunction was square to liith.this shows you felt love for him from deep with in you. but chiron's presence shows that when you professed you affection, he would may a joke out of it. and if he every said he had affection for you ,he would also add a comment that brought you down a bit. he gave you backed handed compliments at best. chiron shows he was critical for no reason and nothing you did wa good enough for him.

finally that all he ever wanted was ex from you is shown by the venus/pluto and Venus/ixion midpoints conjunct the node. the venus/pluto mp is purely carnal, that is purely sexual with no interest in emotional intimacy or love. the venus/ixion mp shows he had a bad boy complex and never really showed you respect. though you did notice this because your were so hung up on the enchantment of the relationship.

really it just seems you youth worked against you. you may have never run into such emotional disingenuity before .

rahu
 

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zipadee

Well-known member
Thanks so much Rahu,

Very interesting, maybe the relationship would have led to this.

Although there was chemistry and stimulating conversation, we never reached an affectionate/sexual relationship.
 
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