Help me with my twisted love life!! Will I ever find a relationship?
- Thread starter virgoprincess
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waybread
Well-known member
As some who is not quite 22, you seem to have time on your side? Why the rush? So many early 20-somethings value their new freedom and are anything but anxious to pair up, let alone to get married and start a family.
Probably one of the biggest turn-offs to a legitimate prospective BF is the woman's projecting a whole lot of need, which he is then expected to fill. This is a heavy burden to place on another person. The Unavailables have few worries about getting roped in, and the Unattacheds might head for the hills if they think you want to get too serious too soon.
Try being the happiest, best single you know how to be, and to relax around your single status. Once you can do this sincerely and shed your neediness, you will become much more attractive to Mr. Right.
Astrologically transiting Neptune has been opposing your natal sun. This can be a very trying time of low energy and self-doubt. What you believed to be real and true about yourself seems like it was all a big illusion, after all. In your case the situation is being exacerbated by Neptune's pairing-up with the planetoid Chiron ("where it hurts") so you are probably feeling some emotional pain keenly at this time. A good use of this transit, however, is to develop a healthy sense of spirituality-- have faith in the universe to support you. Just try to avoid too much alcohol and drugs during this period, as you will probably be extra-vulnerable to them.
Neptune in the 11th house of friendships (such as co-workers) could be Mr. Wrong, but Neptune shows more generally, in a stressful aspect, where we are apt to be overly idealistic at one time, and disillusioned at another.
With Venus (your 7th house ruler) conjunct your sun, a loving relationship is very important to you. But the first lesson of Venus is learning to love yourself.
The year ahead does look trying in the relationship department, with transiting Saturn (Dr. No) sitting on the cusp of your 7th house of relationships. (Sometimes Saturn on the cusp or in the 7th house can indicate a relationship with an older person, or someone who seems exceptionally mature (Saturnine) in some way, however.) Saturn always teaches self-sufficiency and deferred gratification, however, so it might just be asking you to work on your independent solo skills.
Sometimes people (oh, like my daughter and my niece) don't meet the right guy till later in life. This can be hard to contemplate in your early 20s, but definitely worth the wait if it happens.
Probably one of the biggest turn-offs to a legitimate prospective BF is the woman's projecting a whole lot of need, which he is then expected to fill. This is a heavy burden to place on another person. The Unavailables have few worries about getting roped in, and the Unattacheds might head for the hills if they think you want to get too serious too soon.
Try being the happiest, best single you know how to be, and to relax around your single status. Once you can do this sincerely and shed your neediness, you will become much more attractive to Mr. Right.
Astrologically transiting Neptune has been opposing your natal sun. This can be a very trying time of low energy and self-doubt. What you believed to be real and true about yourself seems like it was all a big illusion, after all. In your case the situation is being exacerbated by Neptune's pairing-up with the planetoid Chiron ("where it hurts") so you are probably feeling some emotional pain keenly at this time. A good use of this transit, however, is to develop a healthy sense of spirituality-- have faith in the universe to support you. Just try to avoid too much alcohol and drugs during this period, as you will probably be extra-vulnerable to them.
Neptune in the 11th house of friendships (such as co-workers) could be Mr. Wrong, but Neptune shows more generally, in a stressful aspect, where we are apt to be overly idealistic at one time, and disillusioned at another.
With Venus (your 7th house ruler) conjunct your sun, a loving relationship is very important to you. But the first lesson of Venus is learning to love yourself.
The year ahead does look trying in the relationship department, with transiting Saturn (Dr. No) sitting on the cusp of your 7th house of relationships. (Sometimes Saturn on the cusp or in the 7th house can indicate a relationship with an older person, or someone who seems exceptionally mature (Saturnine) in some way, however.) Saturn always teaches self-sufficiency and deferred gratification, however, so it might just be asking you to work on your independent solo skills.
Sometimes people (oh, like my daughter and my niece) don't meet the right guy till later in life. This can be hard to contemplate in your early 20s, but definitely worth the wait if it happens.
virgoprincess
Member
Hi Waybread,
Thank you very much for taking the time to look at my chart, I really appreciate that!
I know, you are right, I am young but I am an old soul and that is why I wonder about these things. i don't find flings and casual relationships for fulfilling in any sort of way. I've been single for 5 years now and haven't really had a relationship I consider to be mature and fulfilling as of yet. Just teenage silly things! So I guess it feels like I've been going through the same thing over and over again and that's why I feel bored of being single at such a young age.
But also, at the moment everyone around me seem to be in relationships and it's getting to the point where I'm hearing 'we need to find you a man' 'when are you gonna get a boyfriend' a little too often...feeling the pressure! It's not even so much that I'm desperate for a relationship, I would like one but also just to show all these people that it can happen for me too because I feel a bit like people just think I'm always gonna be single!
I know and agree that neediness is certainly a turn off and I don't really think that I am. I would never show a man if I was. I actually have trouble showing affection, not just to men but in general, and I do have issues when it comes to communicating how I really feel. Think my 4th house says it all, my mum has the same issues.
I can't wait for Neptune to give me a break. Funnily enough, The last two failed non-relationships I had were with actors, feel like they brought to me especially by neptune lol.
Thank you very much for taking the time to look at my chart, I really appreciate that!
I know, you are right, I am young but I am an old soul and that is why I wonder about these things. i don't find flings and casual relationships for fulfilling in any sort of way. I've been single for 5 years now and haven't really had a relationship I consider to be mature and fulfilling as of yet. Just teenage silly things! So I guess it feels like I've been going through the same thing over and over again and that's why I feel bored of being single at such a young age.
But also, at the moment everyone around me seem to be in relationships and it's getting to the point where I'm hearing 'we need to find you a man' 'when are you gonna get a boyfriend' a little too often...feeling the pressure! It's not even so much that I'm desperate for a relationship, I would like one but also just to show all these people that it can happen for me too because I feel a bit like people just think I'm always gonna be single!
I know and agree that neediness is certainly a turn off and I don't really think that I am. I would never show a man if I was. I actually have trouble showing affection, not just to men but in general, and I do have issues when it comes to communicating how I really feel. Think my 4th house says it all, my mum has the same issues.
I can't wait for Neptune to give me a break. Funnily enough, The last two failed non-relationships I had were with actors, feel like they brought to me especially by neptune lol.
waybread
Well-known member
Marinka-- I couldn't reply to your visitor message on this thread via PM, so hopefully you will catch it here. Yes, I was looking at the SR chart re: Saturn on the 7th house cusp. You can view either a SR chart as planets arrayed around the natal; or as its own chart for the moment. As Geoffrey Cornelius noted, you can have more than one radical chart for a given moment.
Hey, your venus is Rx (mine too), I`ve read many people with this only marry after the age of 30, as there are lessons regarding their view of love, their self worth, and such that needs to be learned.(not to discourage you though, Lol)
My venus is not rx and I married at 35
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[deleted response to attacking remarks - Moderator]
You're right. It does go direct. Progressions are slow processes though, I'd say.
I view a rx planet as, kind of born with a wound. Like, maybe there's a problem with your leg since birth, and you have to go through some (perhaps painful) exercises and practice to get you walking normally again.
This being an example of being born with a planet rx, that goes direct--after which the healing process slowly takes place.
I've read the idea behind venus rx is that every r.ship is a lesson for you- more than it is for other people. It works to set your venus "straight", by identifying its shortcomings, be it a low sense of self worth, being too strongly attached in relationships, having been taken advantage of in r.ships in a past life, or any other misunderstanding about love, etc.
I think that's why many with Venus rx experience more than the average problems in their relationships.
Just my opinion .
You're right. It does go direct. Progressions are slow processes though, I'd say.
I view a rx planet as, kind of born with a wound. Like, maybe there's a problem with your leg since birth, and you have to go through some (perhaps painful) exercises and practice to get you walking normally again.
This being an example of being born with a planet rx, that goes direct--after which the healing process slowly takes place.
I've read the idea behind venus rx is that every r.ship is a lesson for you- more than it is for other people. It works to set your venus "straight", by identifying its shortcomings, be it a low sense of self worth, being too strongly attached in relationships, having been taken advantage of in r.ships in a past life, or any other misunderstanding about love, etc.
I think that's why many with Venus rx experience more than the average problems in their relationships.
Just my opinion .
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wilsontc
Staff member
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All,
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All,
I deleted attacking posts and counter-attacking posts because they violate the AW Forum rules about not attacking others and not responding to attacks. While the posts contained some astrology, since they were attacking, I deleted the entire post. If you have a problem with a post please report the post using the "!" button next to the post. If you want to post your comments back without the attacks, that is fine. I will continue to delete attacking posts if they are posted again.
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virgoprincess
Member
I agree with you, I didn't actually even think about the fact that I have venus rx but yes I think it does make a difference. I seem to attract romance everywhere I go and in every stage of life i go through and after every encounter I seem to go through a lot of personal growth and change.
Do you remember where you did your reading on venus rx?
Don't worry, I know every chart is different anyway but It's not too discouraging because Kate Middleton is in her twenties and has venus rx and she is now married to prince william!
http://astrologybits.com/retrograde-venus-natal/ (this was the very first piece I read about venus rx)
http://sasstrology.com/2012/08/when-venus-hides-her-face-venus-retrograde-in-the-natal-chart.html
http://horizonsmagazine.com/Astrology/RetrogradePlanets.html
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