Witchyone
Well-known member
I am a guilt-ridden creature. I always have been. I have Pisces moon, which is involved in a lot of my chart, including a Yod, and Jupiter in Pisces. I am also Pisces dominant according to most dominance calculators (one said I'm Taurus dominant.) I have Venus and Chiron in the 12th house. Neptune is in the 7th, which I believe is a rose-colored glasses placement.
Recently I became so guilt-ridden over something bad I did (bad, but not criminal, not even _that_ bad relative to things I've forgiven other people for), I collapsed into a deep depression. I became anxious and paranoid. I think I actually broke with reality for a few months because of this intense guilt. It was like I felt I deserved to be punished (suffering and humiliation weren't enough, I suppose), so my subconscious invented scenarios where I would be punished (exposed for my sins, raped, murdered...extreme, extreme stuff.)
I confessed what I did. The person who had the most reason to be upset by what I did has forgiven me. But still, I can't go back to the way I was before. I feel stifled, tainted, unworthy. What do you think? Is this Karma? Did I do something horrible in a past life and not get punished for it? Is this normal? Do other Pisces-dominants feel this extreme sense of responsibility to do the right thing, always, and to expect punishment if you don't?
Recently I became so guilt-ridden over something bad I did (bad, but not criminal, not even _that_ bad relative to things I've forgiven other people for), I collapsed into a deep depression. I became anxious and paranoid. I think I actually broke with reality for a few months because of this intense guilt. It was like I felt I deserved to be punished (suffering and humiliation weren't enough, I suppose), so my subconscious invented scenarios where I would be punished (exposed for my sins, raped, murdered...extreme, extreme stuff.)
I confessed what I did. The person who had the most reason to be upset by what I did has forgiven me. But still, I can't go back to the way I was before. I feel stifled, tainted, unworthy. What do you think? Is this Karma? Did I do something horrible in a past life and not get punished for it? Is this normal? Do other Pisces-dominants feel this extreme sense of responsibility to do the right thing, always, and to expect punishment if you don't?