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  #1  
Unread 11-01-2018, 12:22 AM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Silent Treatment who will contact first?

Okay guys, I just asked this question.
But I know that by the norms of the horary questions, it isn't advisable for the ascendant to be in the last degrees, but I found that the composition of the chart... interesting, mainly in what we can observe if we catch bull in the ascendant we will have the 3 main ones (sun, acs and moon ) in very stubborn signs ... which is the main reason of the question, usually stubborn people who give the silent treatment.
If we take the asc in taurus we have a good trine with venus and mars but in retrogradation
If we take the asc in gemini, I would be in conjunction with jupiter
I know that reading isn't as simple as it sounds, but if you think it's worth the risk I am open to hearing
I don't know if you can risk answering, but I was very curious.
Thank you for your attention, anyway.
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Last edited by AquaVenusian; 11-01-2018 at 12:27 AM.
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  #2  
Unread 11-01-2018, 05:08 AM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

It looks like you do, but right now I wouldn't expect the next encounter to go well (moon applying to an opposition with Mars.) Venus retrograde does apply to a trine with Mars around Nov. 9-10, so perhaps things can be patched up then.

One meaning of a late degree rising is that there is nothing to be done about the situation. But another meaning is that the situation is about to change, signified by the ascendant moving into a new sign.
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Last edited by waybread; 11-01-2018 at 05:14 AM.
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Unread 11-01-2018, 10:27 AM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

I agree with waybread that you will most likely be the one who initiates contact, with moon in your 3rd. But the thing is moon/venus and mars will all be in pitted degrees when this opposition happens, and in his L3/saturns detriment, so don't expect much.

Depending on how stubborn you are this could happen in 9-10 days/weeks.
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Unread 11-01-2018, 01:10 PM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

Thank you girls, you are the best ones ... I love you both.
Sooo... I don't want to reach out to her, I want to wait for her to reach out me, because for obvious reasons, I've always tried to bring solutions and accept situations where I was right just to keep the peace ... but currently I feel strongly that I must be strong and try to get accustomed to the situation in the silent treatment and living my life without stress
I think that in love we shouldn't be like this, but when there is no collaboration with someone possibly narcissistic issues, perhaps the best is to keep as in this path without contact, in order not to submit to emotional abuse
Does this chart show any intention of hers in doing this ?!

I will post another chart, if you can help me give more opinion about all this history, the chart that I will post I already had some clarification about it through an experienced guide, but in these last two years I have been through severe emotional abuse that I can't understand this attachment to this person, I know it's not good for me, I know that this a toxic attachment, but I've had a strong conflict between my mind and my heart, my mind of all the obvious reasons to go forward without looking back but my heart wants to have compassion in a relationship detrimental to me ... anyway ... I'll explain in the next post .... my experienced guide used Uranus as my ruler, I had not yet seen someone to use Uranus for aquarius in question time ... so I would like some more clarification, if possible for you girls.
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Unread 11-01-2018, 02:05 PM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

Yes i can see what your saying, you/venus are impeded being retrograde, in detriment in scorpio, and have also been under combustion for a while. This is the state she has got you in.

The last communication conflict was between moon/L3 sun, 4 units ago, 4 days/weeks ?

Something changing/changed in you now though, with the change of signs into Libra and away from the suns rays, this is why your refusing for now to reach out to her, with how she has treated you.

This chart is a very late asc though, so just give it some time, and see about this approaching moon/mars, and what becomes of this first.
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Unread 11-01-2018, 02:36 PM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

Our last conversation that led to a definitive discussion was because of a post from her in whatsapp status, and this conversation was like an opening of seas of understanding about an important fact about the possible drama that she caused throughout the relationship although I am in a conflict between mind and heart, I have always done things to help her by listening to my heart, not my mind, so I am so desperate to understand this relationship and have an attitude head over heart decision ... because I literally discharged my head ... anyway ... the conflict was because she had won a mattress through her father, and asked me to buy the support of this mattress ... but I denied it at the time, so she told me that her mother would buy ... at the time I thought that strange ... if she has a bed in her mother's house and her father, why would she need a new full double bed ?!
so a few weeks later she broke up with me saying that she loved the ex, with no reasonable reason for that (I thought it was drama) ... she asked me to go on as friends (I'm super aquarian, I do not care) ... but almost two months later she made this post and I took one thing to another ... the reason for the discussion was like proof that she was taking advantage of me ... I was upset about it ... when you read with the facts of the front, there is no way not to be nervous ... there is no way to follow a friendship like this. Was like ... She almost made me buy a bed for her to sleep with her ex ?! WTF
I confronted her and we had this discussion, but she felt offended and escaped in the middle of the conversation .... that was last August 5th ... it was our last conversation, without any conclusion.
Doing this I did not get a resolution of everything that happened, I blocked it and deleted it from the social networks and the cell phone.
So I stand in this impasse to have compassion, at the same time I'm looking for reasons to justify her behavior and understand her ... I strongly believe she has boderline disord or covert narcissist ... even more by the conflicting aspect in her natal chart ... mercury square moon plus moon conjunct pluto
I'm in a different position ... I'm creating inner strength ... but the problem is that I want to put an end to what has been in the air ... struggling to have a decent closure of this chaos... I can't understand people doing this ... I have the ability to forgive and move on what I do not want is definitely someone hurting me purposely as I have struggled not to believe that is the intention of hers.
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Unread 11-01-2018, 03:12 PM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

"I confronted her and we had this discussion, but she felt offended and escaped in the middle of the conversation .... that was last August 5th ... it was our last conversation, without any conclusion.
Doing this I did not get a resolution of everything that happened, I blocked it and deleted it from the social networks and the cell phone."


Right so this would have been the moon/sun square 3 1/2 units away, sun being pitted at this point would have caused the "no resolution" even though there was reception from the planets.

But this is going to happen again, your going to cave in and reach back out with this approaching moon/mars in both 3rd houses, but once again no success.
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Unread 11-01-2018, 06:46 PM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chrysalis View Post
"I confronted her and we had this discussion, but she felt offended and escaped in the middle of the conversation .... that was last August 5th ... it was our last conversation, without any conclusion.
Doing this I did not get a resolution of everything that happened, I blocked it and deleted it from the social networks and the cell phone."


Right so this would have been the moon/sun square 3 1/2 units away, sun being pitted at this point would have caused the "no resolution" even though there was reception from the planets.

But this is going to happen again, your going to cave in and reach back out with this approaching moon/mars in both 3rd houses, but once again no success.
I will wait in silence ... if she comes to reach me I will try to contain my inner beast ... if she doesn't come to me I will continue with my effort to protect my emotional, until I can adapt better, do my best to focus on myself and open myself to meet other people.
Thanks you my friend 😘
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  #9  
Unread 11-03-2018, 05:41 AM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

AquaVenusian: well, you know the situation and this woman better than I do.

But perhaps there's a middle ground, where you no longer care to be in a relationship with her, but you don't give her the silent treatment either. You can be cordial and communicate occasionally-- at arm's length. Personally I wouldn't have a problem with your cutting her off, it's just that I think the chart is showing some future contact. Maybe you can keep it "lite."
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My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we値l change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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Unread 11-03-2018, 10:40 PM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Originally Posted by waybread View Post
AquaVenusian: well, you know the situation and this woman better than I do.

But perhaps there's a middle ground, where you no longer care to be in a relationship with her, but you don't give her the silent treatment either. You can be cordial and communicate occasionally-- at arm's length. Personally I wouldn't have a problem with your cutting her off, it's just that I think the chart is showing some future contact. Maybe you can keep it "lite."
Thats right my friend ... I don't like to have "enemies" I prefer much more, keep friends ... friendly contacts and sincerely I think this is what can vail among us ... but only if she makes the first movement an effort to reach me ... if she makes that effort, sure that I'll cooperate .. but I will not reach out to her. she reached my limit through her treatment with me ... the most appropriate would be to wait for the trine between mars and moon ... between 9 and 10 of this month ...to see what happens, right !?
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  #11  
Unread 11-03-2018, 11:18 PM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

If you don't like holding a grudge, see what letting go of this one might look like. You don't want to be lovers, just to clear your own psychic space so that your feelings become neutral.
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My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we値l change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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  #12  
Unread 11-04-2018, 12:59 AM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Originally Posted by waybread View Post
If you don't like holding a grudge, see what letting go of this one might look like. You don't want to be lovers, just to clear your own psychic space so that your feelings become neutral.

yes ... it's what I'm trying to do ... I'm not prepared to accept it without affecting my emotional ... for the moment, I want to accept her as a friend but I still can't get to this point because I still have feelings, currently I can't even relate to anyone else .. I'am very emotionally responsible as long as I don't clean what I feel for her I can't relate to another person because I think I would be using the other one ... I know I'm going to get over this ... I need time to clear this psychic space to the point that it's indifferent to me ... and then make room for something to be built between us ... I have a lot of compassion to her .. but this compassion has reached a limit that I don't want it to affect my emotional, it was very painful for me ... like emotional exhaustion, I understand that it was a lesson for me to learn ... you have "accompanied" practically from the beginning ... I'm sorry for her, but it's been a great emotional risk for me to be able to bear for an intimate emotional bond ... by the way ... this weekend I learned a lot from a friend like her ... she said that when she is liking someone she is afraid of being hurt and so she betrays or gets other attitudes that hurt the other one ... sooo she doesn't have to deal with the possibility of someone hurting her first (ego, right?!) ... so in this way she prefers to hurt the other first .. (sadly) but I understand that in my situation, it will never change ...she does not have emotional maturity ... many friends told me that I need to be patient and wait for about 6 years for our situation to evolve, I don't know if we have free will or if we can really choose what we want to live, but that would be a huge job ... I don't want to live in illusion or live with someone who activates their defense for a simple fear to hurt themselves ....I've been thinking that maybe I'd better be lonely and invest in my self-esteem ... I've never gotten a reciprocal relationship, I don't even know what that is 🤔...
Anyway ... thanks for all my friend ... I have a lot of respect for your advice, you have always helped me from the beginning ... I really wish things were simple ... but it seems that there are situations that happen to us and that it's not a matter of choice ... these situations simply happen in our lives ... I really wish I could to choose my path 😕
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Unread 11-04-2018, 02:36 AM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

So why do you even have to think of her as a friend? How about, as an acquaintance? Or as someone you had a relationship with once, in the past? Can you think of her as someone in your rear-view mirror, while not discounting the likelihood that your paths may cross occasionally, and it's not worth your emotional well-being never to even say hello to her?

(And yes, this takes time and self-discipline.)

For sure invest in your self-esteem. It's OK to be solo for a while. You may come to find that you enjoy the autonomy, without having always to reference someone else. You cannot always choose what life throws at you, but you can choose your responses.

With best wishes for your journey, W.
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My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we値l change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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Unread 11-04-2018, 03:46 AM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by waybread View Post
So why do you even have to think of her as a friend? How about, as an acquaintance? Or as someone you had a relationship with once, in the past? Can you think of her as someone in your rear-view mirror, while not discounting the likelihood that your paths may cross occasionally, and it's not worth your emotional well-being never to even say hello to her?

(And yes, this takes time and self-discipline.)

For sure invest in your self-esteem. It's OK to be solo for a while. You may come to find that you enjoy the autonomy, without having always to reference someone else. You cannot always choose what life throws at you, but you can choose your responses.

With best wishes for your journey, W.
Good ones (questions and reflections).
(About keeping friendship) Because it was a very intense connection ... like soul mates ... perhaps, karmic ones... I feel her like a lost fragment. Although the lessons she brought me were very painful, this experience awakened me many changes, for example, feeling connected to my emotions and feelings, knowing how to listen to my heart, now seeing the importance of keeping both "heart and mind" connected within of the relationship (if that is possible) to face emotional pain (something I have always swept under the rug) to impose limits on the relationship ... to have a principle of compassion ... and also brought the fear of finding someone worse than her (hahaha I ' m just kidding ... but yeah I'm afraid this hahahah).
Sooo... while she still has power over my emotions, no ... hello ... isn't worth to me. I am at the beginning of recognizing the nature of my emotions, this will take a time of healing and overcoming, but I will succeed. I have built many personal goals that I really can't distract from relationships in a period of 5 years ahead.
As I said, I am in conflict between my heart and my mind ... I have never had this position before ... is not easy my friend ... my heart did everything I could, investing in a bottomless package and without reciprocity ... I would really like things worked out between us ... but it didn't and now what I have done is to convince my mind that it will never change .... she is very similar to my mother's personality and I think that in a way, it was the same hurt feelings in my childhood ... I need to heal this ... me and myself alone ... and I really would like to get over things fast ... but I can't ... you can perceive in my desperation to understand this feelings and not succeed about it ... I really miss her even though I have struggled a lot to stay strong ... other relationships that I have .. always overcome by replacing someone else ... I don't want this to happen this time, I feel that I need to be well with myself and challenge myself facing the that I will face without seeking substitute of relationship barely resolved with myself.
I agree with you about having the possibility to choose what life puts on our paths ... but this also brings some reasons and some fear of not being strong enough to face and end up entering the same path again.
Anyway ..
Thanks a lot ... you're great thanks for the effort to bring me consciousness. I hope someday I'll be able to reciprocate. 😘
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Unread 11-13-2018, 08:03 PM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

I want to update you girls about the understanding on this issue ... I found it very interesting, by the way
I strongly believe she's trying to contact me, but again indirectly (I'm really very impatient for her games and manipulations )
I have 3 friends in common with her in my whatsapp ... which I chose to keep, but all of them I deleted from my social pages .... why ?! because she had these covert actions where she deleted me from her social media pages but she still knew things about me and stalked me through her friends ... but she for herself never directly assumes what she wants to know or never expresses herself honestly for me as I always did with her !!
Exactly on the 9th as you both told me, one of her friends whom I deleted from my social networks about a year and a half ago, because of his stalker action wanting to know my steps when she and I had broken. .. precisely on the 9th last he sent me this request to my instagram again
This has been repetitive actions, another friend of hers in the past, after I deleted (friend I talked to once in life) when he realized that I deleted him, he immediately added me again
Now once again .... I think I'll never take an honest and sincere approach from her !!
I didn't accept this "friend" yet, I strongly believe that it is actually her, behind this page of it ... because if he just wanted to talk to me, he could access me in whatsapp .... It's a lot of coincidence ... why now ?! and why not her ?!
it really seems that if I want some contact with her, I'll have to make the effort to contact her ... so far you're right about everything !!

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  #16  
Unread 11-14-2018, 04:17 AM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

Venusian, this song is for you:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx3QmqV2pHg

Sometimes people come into our lives for a reason, and when that reason is basically fulfilled, even though we don't see it at the time, they move on.

Social media truly complicate our lives!
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My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we値l change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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Unread 11-14-2018, 07:58 AM
yoyostar yoyostar is offline
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

I love this song, waybread
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  #18  
Unread 11-14-2018, 09:32 AM
AquaVenusian AquaVenusian is offline
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Venusian, this song is for you:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx3QmqV2pHg

Sometimes people come into our lives for a reason, and when that reason is basically fulfilled, even though we don't see it at the time, they move on.

Social media truly complicate our lives!
Waybread ... it's better for me this way ... move on .... deep down I've always known that ... every time I have more awareness that her tactics will never change ... and that I definitely don't have the power to change it ... I will delay my life, when clearly what life is trying, is to get me to take forward ..... I would like to have patience to deal with these childish behaviors ... but if I do I will just hurt me more ... what I can and whar I'll do is pray for her to receive love and light in her path.
This song is my story hahahahaha amazing resonance with my situation ... thanks my friend ... I'm going to download this song.
Yeah .. I really hate social media ... I use just to keep some contacts ... but I always scan my contacts and I always have my times on and off from there ... I never keep updating my life there ... and I hate that people are checking my things. 😒

Love and light for you too. 🎈😍
Thanks you 😗

Last edited by AquaVenusian; 11-14-2018 at 09:36 AM.
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Unread 11-14-2018, 11:50 PM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

Best wishes for your journey, W.
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My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we値l change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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Unread 11-15-2018, 02:38 AM
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Re: Silent Treatment who will contact first?

Quote:
Originally Posted by AquaVenusian View Post
Thats right my friend ... I don't like to have "enemies" I prefer much more, keep friends ... friendly contacts and sincerely I think this is what can vail among us ... but only if she makes the first movement an effort to reach me ... if she makes that effort, sure that I'll cooperate .. but I will not reach out to her. she reached my limit through her treatment with me
*

*aqua!
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