4th House and Sense of Belonging

Apologies if there are threads on this - I couldn't find any except Koshka's query but I wanted a broader discussion.

In my view the 4th house is supposed to show our roots and our foundations, upon which we build our lives. It is not the same as a sense of identity, as I think identity and one's sense of self expression is a sun thing (and an Asc thing). But I think it is just as important - the 4th house is about what makes you feel secure.

I would like to see how others view their 4th houses - I have a problem with mine which I would like to share.

I have Pisces on my IC, with Jupiter in the 4th house. My parents emigrated from their home country to the UK before I was born and I lived in California when I was young before we moved back to the UK.

When I was 12, at the time of my Jupiter return, I went to my grandfather's funeral in California. It was the first time I had been back to California (or abroad) since I was very young. When I returned I felt this profound sense of loss - that I belonged somewhere else, somewhere other than where I lived.

I've had that feeling ever since. That no matter where I was, there was somewhere else that was where I was supposed to be, somewhere else I was supposed to put down roots. Almost as if there was a cosmic mix up and i had been put in the wrong place.

I feel that if only I knew where I was supposed to be, everything else - career, relationships, family, would fall into place. And it sometimes make me feel like I've lost something - something I can't quite put my finger on. Almost as if I've been exiled from someplace.

It results in a broader question of what I am supposed to be doing, what my purpose is (I guess the 4th house is a natural trine to the 12th and 8th houses).

I know who I am but I don't know what I am supposed to be doing. And sometimes I feel that all of the above is a mask - what if I am not running toward something but am running away from something? Is this pure escapism? I generally get on with people, so I don't think these feelings represent a problem with friendships etc. If anything I have good friends in London and I know more about the history of the area where I grew up than anyone else I know, which make me feel even more conflicted about being somewhere else.

Does anyone else have this feeling and attribute it to any particular astrological signature?

It would be good to know your thoughts and experiences in general about Pisces on the IC or Jupiter in the 4th.

The 4th houses sense of belonging is not limited to places, but also to people you have close fellowship. They often get confused. Sometimes people feel they belong in place, but it is only because of the people that there. If those people were suddenly vanish, they might no longer fell connected.

The_Sundance_Kid said:

I would like to see how others view their 4th houses - I have a problem with mine which I would like to share.

...

It would be good to know your thoughts and experiences in general about Pisces on the IC or Jupiter in the 4th.

Click to expand...

I sincerely appreciate your desire for general thoughts and experiences.

Jupiter in the 4th and Pisces on the IC typically does not constitute a chart signature. I do think that aspects to Jupiter and the IC, and the planets and houses from which they emanate would tell us much about your unique personal experience. Likewise, the overall chart pattern and temperament would also shed light, should you be inclined to post your chart.

All the angles represent "identity." The ascendant is the "identity" of the "personality"; the 4th house cusp represents the innermost PRIVATE identity, as opposed to the MC which represents the most PUBLIC identity; and the 7th represents the identity of the "other" one is most likely to be attracted to.

Of course, the rulers of these houses aspect other planets, so there is a great deal of modification to confuse us. Then there are planets IN these houses which may or may not be in the same sign as the sign on the cusp!!

That is why one always needs to see the chart.

But to your basic question: if a heavy planet, especially Uranus, Neptune or Pluto rules your IC, and that ruler difficultly aspected, yeah... your sense of "belonging" is problematical. It is connected to your comfort within your own BEING. If you don't identify with your environment you need to change your environment (geographically)or cosmetically. Paint colors, furniture, rugs, draperies....everything within your home has the power to make you feel MORE comfortable or less comfortable.

I think we've all gone into homes where we feel comfortable immediately and also the opposite....beautiful, but I couldn't live here...that type of feeling.

So if you can't literally MOVE, you probably can modify your home in some way.

Also make time for things you WANT to do.

My suggestion is to read and study and do the exercises in the book, "Creative Visualization" by Shakti Gawain.
After you do this, you will be LESS confused about why you don't feel you "belong."

I myself am a bit of an outsider. Uranus rules my 4th house cusp and resides in my 7th square Mars. But it also trines Neptune.... so there IS a place deep inside myself where I am at home.... and along with other things, Astrology has, for decades, helped me feel identified.
LIN

I do think that your feelings are related with Jupiter in the 4th: 'an imbedded psychic yearning to travel abroad' ...keeping in mind that the 4th also relates to our genetic imprinting; also recent research is now claiming that our memories [and those of our ancestors] are actually passed down through our very cells, through which karmic memories could also be encoded. As per your statement: “Almost as if there was a cosmic mix up and i had been put in the wrong place.” I totally believe that to be possible. Your statement of feeling alienated is very much a condition of the Indigo generation;
your reference to feeling exiled could indeed represent a karmic memory.
Are you of the generation having the conjunct of Uranus and Neptune by chance?...this can definitely suggest dissociative states of being. Where is Neptune in your chart and how is it configured? With Jupiter? Also what planets may you have in your 9th house? These are questions that would contribute to the answer. Also the implications in the 10th, and the consideration of the nodes, represents where we are supposed to be going in life; our outcomes as they are reflected in our past. In terms of escapism, what energies might you have in the 12th?

All,

Thank you so much for your replies - they have given me a lot to think about. I had started thinking my feelings were very Piscean, but having read your responses about looking at the chart as a whole I also noticed my intercepted 9th house and had this thought that maybe with Leo being trapped there my sense of identity is in limbo as my sun, ruling no house, is frustrated but on some level is looking to express itself overseas. And the sun is obviously a big player being conjunct the Asc.

I think I am attached to the UK because of the people, but the people aren't a pull anywhere else - I am definitely feeling a pull out of the UK despite my affiliation to its people. Despite liking and being liked by my fellow Brits I still feel as if I don't belong. Most of the time I refer to Britons in the third person, as if I was not one of them.

I was also thinking these feelings may have gotten stronger in the past few months as Saturn transits over my 12th house and Asc, but I have had this lingering feeling for an awful lot longer so Saturn may only be the trigger for this thread rather than these feelings.

It is interesting that the focus in the responses is shifted onto Jupiter rather than Pisces. I have always viewed Jupiter as a very positive influence - my parents have taught me a great deal about the culture I have inherited. In fact part of the problem might be that I was raised within a culture that has no homeland as there is no way I can ever move back to where my parents came from - I wouldn't fit there despite my parental inheritance.

In any case I attach my chart to see how this can piece together. I'm 99% sure no one can look at this and say "you definitely need to move to [California] [Australia] [Uzbekistan]" but fingers' crossed!

I also had a thought that if I find the key underlying astrological issues at play, I might be able to use relocation astrology to see if they have geographical rather than purely psychological solutions...

No, no one can say "go here or there" as your issue is very heavy and personal and it comes under the heading of baggage which must be shed before you can completely move on.
Saturn oppose Moon. VERY powerful magnet. Moon rules your 9th, but is hobbled by Saturn.

And your Piscean feelings are absolutely valid as you have a very difficult Venus...in the 12th conj. Pluto. It trines Jupiter, but it's like fighting your way out of a sticky mess in order to use the trine.
The Sun may not rule a house but it co-rules the 9th AND is potentially the most powerful planet in your chart, as it is on the ASC. It is square Mars so for many reasons you may be getting in your own way, being your own worst enemy, and working against your best interests.

Mars rules your 5th house of "taking chances" and speculation, and love and children. And it squares your Sun, so you have a big conflict there....the question being , what is a gamble and what is a calculated risk. But the N.Node is in that 5th house and you do need to be brave and take some chances.

You really need to read Creative Visualization. Anyone with Venus in the 12th has a hard time defining their true desires. It's nice that you have that sextile to Neptune, but if you don't ACT your life will be about dreaming and thinking about doing things instead of actually doing them.

And by the way, Neptune inconjuncts your Moon....so again, baggage from childhood and mother which you really need to confront because of the moon being in the 7th house of partnership.

You also have both Merc and Venus retrograde....so you may repeat thought patterns over and over, making decisions and then going through the whole pattern again and again. And also the Venus retrograde makes it imperative that you KNOW exactly what you want. This is hard for you..... your house of goals is Venus ruled..so with the retrograde Venus your goals may change without warning, or you can talk yourself OUT of your goals...but then begin the process over again ...unfortunately unendingly unless you ACT.

Pluto conj. Venus - ITS message is CHANGE AND DIE. Of course the truth is change OR die. But Pluto is a rough companion for Venus.

You need to work on your life. You need to take the journey INWARD.
I suggest the Creative Visualization book because it is a good starting place.
LIN

The water houses 4th, 8th, and 12th are karmic houses. Those who truly have Jupiter in their 4th house are very blessed and always extremely lucky. You don't strike me as a person with 4th Jupiter but of someone with Mars. I go by whole signs chart and you don't have Jupiter in the 4th, you have Aqua Mars in the 4th... which would make more sense to what you've been describing about childhood emigrations and feeling disconnected.

I have a few friends who have Mars in the 4th and they all say that they don't ever feel like they belong... like they're always a nomad. The funny thing is, they've all been displaced from their country of origin where they identify themselves as the nationality of the country they reside in, not the country they're from.

My 4th house is home to my pluto in scorpio and I can say that it's description fits my foundation. I have a large family, more than 25 first cousins alone but they all reside back in the province where my parents are originally from as are my grandparents, etc. I have no relationship with any of my family except my brothers and parents only because we moved pretty far away when i was a baby and visits from either side just don't happen. Understandable. Except for the fact that my parent are so secretive and dismissive about my relatives that whenever I bring personal details up about any of them, theyjust get so defensive and change the topic. It's very misleading and it just makes me more curious about what they maybe hiding.
This seems very deep and dark to me & once i began studying astrology and my chart, I was starting to wonder how my 4th house pluto in scorpio played it part.

My 4th house is very strong in my chart

I've never felt like I belong my whole life; l always feel I belong somewhere else - not sure where though. Ever since I was in the elementary school I've always "known" that I'd move to some other country later on. My 4th house is in gemini btw