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Horary Questions on Relational Issues For horary questions about relationships.


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  #1  
Unread 09-21-2020, 10:56 AM
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avrillavigne avrillavigne is offline
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Why did he leave me?

I want to ask why my ex left me. As when the relationship ended it turned out that a lot of people were trying to separate us from both sides. We knew each other for years and our relationship was going really well but he abruptly ended it. Now a lot of people, "friends" have opinions and it has turned more dramatic than it needed to be.
I want to know if he didn't love me, if there was someone else or some of his friends tried successfully to separate us.
I am very emotional and stressed at the moment and I am having a hard time reading the chart.

Venus and Mars are not making an aspect which shows no realtionship? But they are in triplicity. I am Mars retrograde which shows my weak state.
Moon in 1st house shows fast changes but it is very weak in Scorpio.
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  #2  
Unread 09-21-2020, 11:43 AM
katydid katydid is online now
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Re: Why did he leave me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by avrillavigne View Post
I want to ask why my ex left me. As when the relationship ended it turned out that a lot of people were trying to separate us from both sides. We knew each other for years and our relationship was going really well but he abruptly ended it. Now a lot of people, "friends" have opinions and it has turned more dramatic than it needed to be.
I want to know if he didn't love me, if there was someone else or some of his friends tried successfully to separate us.
I am very emotional and stressed at the moment and I am having a hard time reading the chart.

Venus and Mars are not making an aspect which shows no realtionship? But they are in triplicity. I am Mars retrograde which shows my weak state.
Moon in 1st house shows fast changes but it is very weak in Scorpio.
You asked why he left. He is Venus in Leo, in the 9th. You are retrograde in the 5th, of love and devotion. He is in the expansive, adventurous 9th, in the sign of pride and royalty. The 9th is also foreign countries. But as you say, Venus and Mars are not in aspect.

So for some reason, you were not on the same page. He is looking towards the future and where he is headed in life. He appears to have some lofty goals and aspirations, and relies upon a strong group of friends and supporters to help him move forward. And with Venus in the 9th, he may see himself being a long distance away from you soon, but surrounded by friends and family. [Venus in 9th sextile Mercury in 11th]

You, as Mars, also make an aspect to that Mercury, his group of friends. You are in opposition to the Mercury in Libra in the 11th. So for some reason you are seen by them as an obstacle. Do they think that you are distracting him from his life's goals?

It seems that they might think you are difficult to get along with?

I can't say he didn't love you. Moon conjunct the Ascendant in Scorpio is very passionate and intense. I bet there were some very loving and deeply emotional exchanges between you both.

But that Moon is in a tension filled square with him, Venus in Leo in the 9th. So for some reason, he felt weakened by that emotional intensity and volatility. He wants to be Leo, King of his jungle.

But you are a rogue retrograde Mars in the 5th, and he didn't plan on being love bombed and being pulled off track like that. For some reason he is afraid that this relationship is detrimental for him, in terms of his future plans and goals.

Does he plan to travel? Or work with his friends on some shared business that would not include you? I don't know.

But he felt he needed to make that tough choice. Did you two have a volatile relationship? Were you jealous of his friends? Or did he think that even if it wasn't true?

Did you make emotional demands or requests that made him feel you were too clingy or needy? It doesn't mean that you were but the Moon on the ascendant square the Venus describes an emotional power struggle of some kind.

Last edited by katydid; 09-21-2020 at 12:19 PM.
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  #3  
Unread 09-21-2020, 01:34 PM
ElenaJ ElenaJ is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

In addition to what katydid outlined very well, just to add two points.
Venus last passed over Uranus, in his 12th house. Which was the sudden break he had with you. Uranus co-rules Aquarius, intercepted in the 3rd house. There's been a lot of gossip being fed to him about you, which in the end brought about the break.
In addition, with mercury opposing you, mars, from your 11th of friends, again shows talk going on about you, and against you.
As mars retrograde you approach a square with Saturn, on the cusp of the 3rd and ruling that house of gossip, so you may find there is more to come.
Your 12th house is at the critical 29th degree, ruled by Venus, his significator, so he was somehow participant in all this behind the scenes drama against you.
Note that exactly on the cusp of the 5th of romanctic love is Chiron, wounded healer, sitting there ready to teach a lesson.
Finally, note that moon on ascendent is exactly in the degree of the nodes.
For some reason this was set up to happen, and you won't be able to do anything to change it. You can only learn from it.
Sorry you are suffering for it, scorpio does take things in deeply, and tends to hold it for a long time. Before mars turns direct, Venus will trine mars so he may contact you again at that point. However, you will then complete the square with Saturn, so may have already moved on.
Take care and try to rise above it.
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  #4  
Unread 09-21-2020, 05:13 PM
lux111 lux111 is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

ElanaJ and Katydid: why do you talk about his group of friends in the 11th? I know the 'overall' theme of the 11th is still acknowledged as 'friends' etc., but why don't you read it as his (turned) 5th?
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  #5  
Unread 09-21-2020, 06:02 PM
ElenaJ ElenaJ is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

Katydid will reply for her part.

You are right, his friends would be the turned 5th.
I wasn't referring to the 11th as his friends. I was writing about Avrillavigne's friends.

Last edited by ElenaJ; 09-22-2020 at 06:44 AM.
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  #6  
Unread 09-22-2020, 03:51 AM
katydid katydid is online now
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Re: Why did he leave me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by lux111 View Post
ElanaJ and Katydid: why do you talk about his group of friends in the 11th? I know the 'overall' theme of the 11th is still acknowledged as 'friends' etc., but why don't you read it as his (turned) 5th?
I read it as her 11th, but knew it included his friends too, as they have been friends for many years.

So I saw it as their shared community, or their circle of friends. But She was Mars, in opposition to that Mercury, so I interpreted it as those friends were backing him and supporting him, as opposed to her, at the moment.

I may be wrong...
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  #7  
Unread 09-22-2020, 05:20 AM
lux111 lux111 is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

Let me propose a theory. I might be completely wrong so take it with a grain of salt..

You probably were getting on great but around the 2nd of August you were starting to slow down ever so slightly.. when Mercury in Cancer, (sign of your fall), in your 8th (this matter was hidden to you) makes a semi-sextile with Venus in Mercury's own sign (Gemini). At the time, Venus was leaving a sextile with you and Mercury was leaving a square with you. Is it possible he was actually at someone's house that day? Someone that you'd had some conflict with..? However, it wasn't a major aspect so not a big deal, but it sets the scene. A few days later, Venus goes into Cancer, the sign of your fall; after that nice sextile and now being comfy in the romantic Moon's sign, he starts feeling irritated by your Mars in Aries energy, like he doesn't like you.

You were about to do something around this time -- make some kind of change or go somewhere, represented by your move into Taurus. You were probably feeling stuck after having been in Aries so long. This change would have been good for him (his sign) but to your detriment (Taurus)... but you slowed down and deliberated. Ultimately this was the right choice for you, but he didn't like it.

Then he changes. On the 1st of September, he moves from his 2nd to his 3rd house, and on the 3rd of Sept., Mercury reappears and swiftly makes sextiles with him. Both at 26 degrees, Venus is in Mercury's terms, so he quite likes whatever is happening, and Mercury is in Venus' triplicity and face.. However, it's also in Venus' fall; with this sextile, Venus has fallen from grace, and Mercury has probably benefited more from the interaction.

So the next day, the 4th of September, he's at 27 degrees Cancer and starts squaring you. You're about to station at 27 Aries; you would have been feeling a strange mix of being a great version of yourself (in your own sign) and wanting to charge into something new, but conflicting feelings about needing to redo something or stay in the same place and keep doing something.. that decision not to do what he wanted probably stressed you, and created conflict between you.. and then things suddenly change when he moves house into his 3rd/your 9th, harshly squaring you from the sign of your fall. Youíre under the earth so you canít see whatís going on up there, and in a few days youíre looking in the opposite direction as well. You have no idea.

They (Merc. and Ven.) continue to communicate/sextile on the 4th and 5th, but by then Venus is out of Mercury' terms, and doesn't really feel good about it anymore.

A couple of days later, Venus moves on from Cancer (the sign of Mars' fall), and into Leo, so his heavy negativity towards you seems to disperse, BUT, Leo is intercepted.. so the reason he's feeling better can't be seen; it's repressed and bottled up.

Anyway, fyi, they're not going to be in contact again for a long time.

So. Although we don't really use minor aspects, we can see that he's the apex of a yod; he's under a lot of pressure from Jupiter and Neptune, rulers of his 8th and 10th. That could be a 'big deception', around debt, drugs, secret sex, hidden problems or big deceits at his work.. or all of them.. but he's stuck in this cadent, intercepted house: he can't blow off the steam and he feels suffocated. He just wants to escape.

And finally, the Moon: what just happened? It squared Venus from your 12th house: a 'hidden enemy', someone or something you don't even know about. But Venus rules your 12H! And furthermore, his antiscion is in his 12H, and his contrascion is in your 12H. He's secretly done something against you which you have no idea about.

Next, the Moon sextiled Jupiter -- his L8, your L2 -- is it about your money, or him having an affair, or is it about his debt? Then, Moon trined strong Neptune in your 4th house -- the end of the matter seems to be about deception. And who did the Moon last pass over? Mercury, the cheating trickster, on the atrocious 22nd degree, in Venus' own house, intercepted, so you don't even see that they're in opposition to you, and in your house of friends at that.. Mercury is also in his ..5th house of casual sex.


As ElenaJ said, on the 29th he will trine you, but on the same day you square Saturn just as it goes direct, so probably you'll have a different perspective by then

Last edited by lux111; 09-22-2020 at 08:02 AM.
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  #8  
Unread 09-22-2020, 06:45 AM
ElenaJ ElenaJ is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

Impressive! Looking forward to Avrillavigna's feedback on this!
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  #9  
Unread 09-22-2020, 10:10 AM
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Re: Why did he leave me?

................

Last edited by avrillavigne; 02-10-2021 at 03:09 PM.
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Unread 09-22-2020, 11:18 AM
ElenaJ ElenaJ is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

Pretty much the story that we all saw in the chart. Thank you for going into this much detail.
If I can suggest something, I wouldn't contact him, because he should be approaching you, according to the chart. After Venus makes the trine with Venus, he will square Saturn and go cold on you again.
For your own mental health, if possible try to separate out the good apples from the rotten ones, and then just move on. With so much love out there in the world, it would be a pity to waste time on those who are so negative.
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  #11  
Unread 09-22-2020, 02:03 PM
lux111 lux111 is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

I agree. Thanks for sharing your whole story. Comparing what you've explained to the chart, it seems like you're quite within your natural rights -- you're struggling sometimes but trying your best. Some of your so-called friends, however, are tricky and fair-weather, (Mercury being either diurnal or nocturnal, and masculine or feminine depending on the hemisphere, ie. who it's with / where it is).

I think you'll soon be in a confident position to let go and unfriend those people who haven't shown themselves to be trustworthy. Until then just take stock and watch what unfolds. Don't initiate anything confrontational until after Mars is direct
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  #12  
Unread 09-23-2020, 08:50 AM
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Re: Why did he leave me?

So he is going to contact me and Saturn (our 'friends') is going to make a conflict between us again?

At first I thought that he was not returning because of his work. It turned out that they fired him because of the pandemic.
Then I had a teory that there might be someone else, but I can't know for a fact.
Then he told me himself that the person he decided to talk to about our relationship from the very start was his horrible friend (B). I don't know what they talked about but this guys insulted me and hit me on two different occasions. Complete horror story.
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  #13  
Unread 09-23-2020, 09:35 AM
ElenaJ ElenaJ is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

In these situations the most insidious thing is that you have no defences, because how does one defend oneself against accusations you don't even know about!
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Unread 09-23-2020, 09:57 AM
lux111 lux111 is offline
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Have he and this guy B been living in the same city?
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Unread 09-23-2020, 10:10 AM
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Re: Why did he leave me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by lux111 View Post
Have he and this guy B been living in the same city?
At one point they even lived together. Now they live in different cities, but in the same country, so they still meet up a lot. I know most of my ex's friends, but I never tought that he is that close with (B).
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Unread 09-23-2020, 11:40 AM
lux111 lux111 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by avrillavigne View Post
At one point they even lived together. Now they live in different cities, but in the same country, so they still meet up a lot. I know most of my ex's friends, but I never tought that he is that close with (B).
This might sound far-fetched, and I donít wanna offend you bc I may be really wrong but.. is there any chance they could have met up around the start of September? Has it ever crossed your mind that one or both of them could be bisexual?

Mercury *could* represent a concept; a group of people, communication, messaging, gossiping etc.. but natal charts deal more with themes; horary is more about specific things/people.. especially personal planets that are quite pertinent in the chart.

It could represent a kind of androgynous/bi person.. or maybe just a two-faced person.

Considering the chart-emphasis on secrets, sex, friends, hidden matters and deception.. it seems like the answer to your Ďwhyí question is something you havenít previously considered
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  #17  
Unread 09-23-2020, 12:34 PM
ElenaJ ElenaJ is offline
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Re: Why did he leave me?

Interesting point. This could explain the physical violence towards avrillavigne, jealousy.
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  #18  
Unread 09-23-2020, 01:16 PM
lux111 lux111 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ElenaJ View Post
Interesting point. This could explain the physical violence towards avrillavigne, jealousy.
I think so too. I mean, a kick in the crotch.. if I was writing a literature-analysis essay, I would be inclined to interpret that as an attack on her sex/uality... itís not a typical masculine action.. Itís a very bitchy thing to do
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Unread 09-23-2020, 02:03 PM
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Re: Why did he leave me?

...........................

Last edited by avrillavigne; 02-10-2021 at 03:10 PM.
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