What's her deal?

Not long ago a friend made a "joke" that is highly disturbing. I made it clear how offensive and unacceptable such a "joke" was. In fact, it wasn't even a "joke"; it was downright malicious and insulting. Afterwards, she carried on laughing at the fact it was highly offensive.

Frankly, it was a joke you just don't make. Like, there is dark humour, racist jokes, sexual humour, whatever, but this "joke" was beyond bad. No one would take it as a joke and would CLEARLY be offended by it. And considering how she would tell me how "special" and how "valuable" our friendship was, I was absolutely beyond confused. I got knifed in the back.

So, after a few days, and a few repeats of this in the past, I said to hell with it and ended the friendship. I was sad; because I thought of her to be a good friend but clearly the way she responded to this just turned my stomach and wasn't evident of someone who valued you as she claimed in the past.

However, on Facebook she'd eventually block me. Now she unblocked me. I don't get to see her regularly but this was odd. I'm curious if she will message me or apologize, or something? What are her motives? Is she going to approach me?

The moon-Venus aspect seems positive; sun-merc; and then ascendant and Jupiter. These aspects are puzzling to me.

F... and the more I think of her the more I actually have strong feelings for her.

Damnit.

Libras...you know... Libras... most stubborn moon placement too: Taurus.

RD, it looks to me like this relationship is over.

You're Mars, your stake in the matter is the moon. Secondarily you're Jupiter. She's Venus. (I use the traditional sign rulers, so for Scorpio rising, it's Mars instead of Pluto.)

In horary, a favourable applying aspect generally means the inquired-about matter will happen. When the planets are separating, what you'd inquired about is normally in your rear-view mirror. We look at faster vs. slower-moving planets to determine whether an aspect is applying or separating. The moon is leaving Venus, Venus is separating from Mars and Jupiter.

So yeah, there was a crazy little something going on between the two of you. But not into the future, according to this chart.

Isn't it for the best? Your friend never saw the light about her cruel "joke." Nothing's to stop her from doing it again, if she still thinks this sort of thing is funny. Obviously you have very different values. You deserve someone who shares your values.

Ru33erDucky said:

Not long ago a friend made a "joke" that is highly disturbing. I made it clear how offensive and unacceptable such a "joke" was. In fact, it wasn't even a "joke"; it was downright malicious and insulting. Afterwards, she carried on laughing at the fact it was highly offensive.

Frankly, it was a joke you just don't make. Like, there is dark humour, racist jokes, sexual humour, whatever, but this "joke" was beyond bad. No one would take it as a joke and would CLEARLY be offended by it. And considering how she would tell me how "special" and how "valuable" our friendship was, I was absolutely beyond confused. I got knifed in the back.

So, after a few days, and a few repeats of this in the past, I said to hell with it and ended the friendship. I was sad; because I thought of her to be a good friend but clearly the way she responded to this just turned my stomach and wasn't evident of someone who valued you as she claimed in the past.

However, on Facebook she'd eventually block me. Now she unblocked me. I don't get to see her regularly but this was odd. I'm curious if she will message me or apologize, or something? What are her motives? Is she going to approach me?

The moon-Venus aspect seems positive; sun-merc; and then ascendant and Jupiter. These aspects are puzzling to me.

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Look at receptions.

If you want to know if you two are really a match, you have to do a synastry.

Thanks way for your interpretation.

muchacho said:

Look at receptions.

If you want to know if you two are really a match, you have to do a synastry.

Click to expand...

I know. We got a good synastry chart. Very good, actually. I'm wondering what's she thinking. Will she send me a message.

As for receptions? I don't recall? What so you mean by receptions? (nevermind, I had to google).

waybread said:

RD, it looks to me like this relationship is over.

You're Mars, your stake in the matter is the moon. Secondarily you're Jupiter. She's Venus. (I use the traditional sign rulers, so for Scorpio rising, it's Mars instead of Pluto.)

In horary, a favourable applying aspect generally means the inquired-about matter will happen. When the planets are separating, what you'd inquired about is normally in your rear-view mirror. We look at faster vs. slower-moving planets to determine whether an aspect is applying or separating. The moon is leaving Venus, Venus is separating from Mars and Jupiter.

So yeah, there was a crazy little something going on between the two of you. But not into the future, according to this chart.

Isn't it for the best? Your friend never saw the light about her cruel "joke." Nothing's to stop her from doing it again, if she still thinks this sort of thing is funny. Obviously you have very different values. You deserve someone who shares your values.

Click to expand...

I'll give more background on what I thibk you're picking up on.

Ru33erDucky said:

Thanks way for your interpretation.



I know. We got a good composite chart. Very good, actually. I'm wondering what's she thinking. Will she send me a message.

As for receptions? I don't recall? What so you mean by receptions?

Click to expand...

Seems you have an inflated opinion of yourself and she doesn't like you.

muchacho said:

Seems you have an inflated opinion of yourself and she doesn't like you.

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Sorry? Based on what? I don't understand the need to attack?

waybread said:

RD, it looks to me like this relationship is over.

You're Mars, your stake in the matter is the moon. Secondarily you're Jupiter. She's Venus. (I use the traditional sign rulers, so for Scorpio rising, it's Mars instead of Pluto.)

In horary, a favourable applying aspect generally means the inquired-about matter will happen. When the planets are separating, what you'd inquired about is normally in your rear-view mirror. We look at faster vs. slower-moving planets to determine whether an aspect is applying or separating. The moon is leaving Venus, Venus is separating from Mars and Jupiter.

So yeah, there was a crazy little something going on between the two of you. But not into the future, according to this chart.

Isn't it for the best? Your friend never saw the light about her cruel "joke." Nothing's to stop her from doing it again, if she still thinks this sort of thing is funny. Obviously you have very different values. You deserve someone who shares your values.

Click to expand...

Do the separating aspects indicate she is physically moving away? She will be moving away for a few months to live at home for a bit and then moving a bit closer for school. She won't be too far away then (this will happen over a course of 5 months).

I'm confused because based on those aspects, the signs make good aspects with each other?

Ru33erDucky said:

Sorry? Based on what? I don't understand the need to attack?

Click to expand...

The chart. Receptions. No attack.

Ru33erDucky said:

Do the separating aspects indicate she is physically moving away? She will be moving away for a few months to live at home for a bit and then moving a bit closer for school. She won't be too far away then (this will happen over a course of 5 months).

I'm confused because based on those aspects, the signs make good aspects with each other?

Click to expand...

What are these opportunities (aspects) worth if there's no intention (reception)?

muchacho said:

The chart. Receptions. No attack.

Click to expand...

Okay. Thanks.

Ru33erDucky said:

Sorry? Based on what? I don't understand the need to attack?

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In horary, when planets are in exaltation and refer to a person, it is said to indicate one who is over-confident and has a "bigged-up sense of self". Hence muchacho's comment.

conspiracy theorist said:

In horary, when planets are in exaltation and refer to a person, it is said to indicate one who is over-confident and has a "bigged-up sense of self". Hence muchacho's comment.

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Ah, I see. Thanks for the explanation. Seems to coincide with my position that I feel she is in the wrong and she should apologize to me. Interesting that shows in the chart.

In any course, she is a Libra. The chart isn't showing any positive aspects; I'll update how things play through; if anything. This isn't the first time.

Ru33erDucky said:

Ah, I see. Thanks for the explanation. Seems to coincide with my position that I feel she is in the wrong and she should apologize to me. Interesting that shows in the chart.

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Exactly! IMO, it perfectly explains the joke gone wrong event you've described there in your OP.

muchacho said:

Exactly! IMO, it perfectly explains the joke gone wrong event you've described there in your OP.

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I honestly thought I said something wrong, or I responded rude to Waybread, and I was like, "inflated ego", "she doesn't like you"? What did I say?

I'm very new to horary. I read them more like natal charts than horary charts.

Sorry for the confusion muchacho. Cheers for the interpretations. I'm learning.

I'm going to bed. I'm tired.

Ru33erDucky said:

I honestly thought I said something wrong, or I responded rude to Waybread, and I was like, "inflated ego", "she doesn't like you"? What did I say?

I'm very new to horary. I read them more like natal charts than horary charts.

Sorry for the confusion muchacho. Cheers for the interpretations. I'm learning.

I'm going to bed. I'm tired.

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Hey, no worries. Reading your own charts can be tricky, especially when you are deeply involved in the story and/or hoping for a specific outcome. In such a case it's easy to miss the most obvious and instead focus on some minor detail that supports your desired outcome. I guess we've all been there.

It just seemed to me that you were on the brink of figuring it out yourself, so I kept it cryptic. It's a lot more fun to figure it out yourself instead of someone just telling you it's a yes or a no.

Horary is absolutely fascinating. But it shouldn't be confused with natal. In natal you've got a lot more latitude in terms of interpretation. If you would apply that same standard to horary, your interpretations would be mostly in fantasy land. And you always have to have your table of essential dignities ready. In natal you can do very well without it.

Ru33erDucky said:

Do the separating aspects indicate she is physically moving away? She will be moving away for a few months to live at home for a bit and then moving a bit closer for school. She won't be too far away then (this will happen over a course of 5 months).

I'm confused because based on those aspects, the signs make good aspects with each other?

Click to expand...

RD, are you clear on the concept of applying vs. separating aspects? In modern natal astrology, they don't matter. We view a natal horoscope as a kind of still photograph. If the moon is at 28 degrees of a sign and Mars is at 23 degrees of that sign, we'd simply say they're conjunct. Horary astrology is much more dynamic. We visualize planets as moving in the sky towards or away from one another. A faster-moving planet approaches (applies to) an aspect with a slower-moving planet, the aspect becomes exact, and the faster-moving planet continues to move past (separates from) the slower-moving planet. A favourable applying aspect, if no other planet runs interference, suggests the matter will reach a favourable conclusion, but a separating aspect says no, it's over.

This is obviously an over-simplification (for example, the fast planet might turn retrograde before the aspect perfects,) but it's OK for starters.

The moon is the fastest-moving planet, completing its orbit in 4 weeks. In contrast, Saturn takes about 29 years to complete an orbit. That's slow-moving. Then roughly in order of speed from fast to slow, we'd have Mercury, Venus, sun, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, and on through the modern outer planets.

A planet separating from (leaving) its last aspect with a planet might indicate a physical move away, but it might also mean emotional distancing, or just that the matter inquired about is not likely to happen, no matter how likely it appeared at one time.

An exalted planet is not necessarily overly-arrogant. Normally it means that the planet is extra-strong. The traditional essential dignities are often used in horary astrology when if matters if one party is in a stronger position than the others.

With reception, we might look at whether 2 planets are in the signs that the other planet rules, or perhaps each is in the exaltation of another. This "swapping" of reception can help to bring about a resolution of a matter even if the mere aspects suggest otherwise. (It gets more complicated but this is a "quick & dirty" start.)

http://www.skyscript.co.uk/essential_dignities.html

So if you think about faster-moving planets leaving slower-moving planets, and whether or not you see a kind of swapping of the major essential dignities (domicile, exaltation) hopefully my reading will become more understandable.

(If I goofed on it, hopefully one of the other horary astrologers here will let us know. It's easy to miss something.)

There are some good on-line tutorials on learning horary, if you're interested.

OK, RD, so here is much more about my reading than you wanted to know, but hopefully another horary astrologer can check my work.

Venus (her) is really strong, in-sect and domiciled in the sign it rules (Taurus.) The moon (your emotional stake in the matter) is strong as well, in-sect, in its own triplicity (night chart) exalted in Taurus.

We might consider some reception taking place here. But.... the moon is also separating from Taurus. Jupiter would be in its own terms were it in Taurus, but Venus doesn't balance the swap. It would be in detriment if it were in Scorpio, although in its own terms.

Ok, you're Mars (traditional ruler of Scorpio rising) and secondarily that first house Jupiter. Jupiter is often a good-luck factor, but here it is retrograde, which kind of balances-out its first house benefit. Mars would be in detriment if it were in Taurus. Mars is strengthened by being in the sign of its exaltation (Capricorn.) You're not without resources and the power to attract.

What I get is that you feel (moon) great around her (those good Taurus vibes) and there is some reciprocation from her, but it's not nearly so strong.

I'm not picking up any antiscions.

Mercury, which rules jokes, has no essential dignity.

The moon separates from its recent conjunction with Venus, Venus separates from its recent trine with Mars. Venus separates from its opposition with Jupiter. Oppositions are not good in horary; and in any case, Jupiter is retrograde, turning away from Venus.

OK, RD, back to plain English.

Some astrologers would leave it at that, but I also try to pay attention to what people write. You still seem not-OK with that horrible "joke" she told. She didn't apologize or indicate that she got your perspective sufficiently to reconsider her ideas of "humour."

What do you think would change if you became romantically involved? Do you think she'd change? (Venus in Taurus is in a fixed sign.) Occasionally people do change, more easily when they're young, but we can't count on it.

Hopefully you can remain friends, if this is what you want.