Can you spot the infidelity in this chart?

Rageypoo

Well-known member
So here is a chart that has the classic Uranus square Venus in synastry, and plenty of neptune squares (very neptune heavy chart) combined with saturn square nodes and moon square ascendant for this to last for 7 long years. Can you spot the exact day the cheating started?

Her chart:

1theleo.jpg


My chart:

1mychart.jpg


our composite:

compositefortheleo.jpg


our synastry (I'm across, she's down):

1synastrysolarfire.jpg




Now for the transits.

Mine:

currenttransits.jpg



Hers:

currenttransitsleo.jpg


Thanks for your time, lemme know what you think.
 
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Lion o ness

Well-known member
Ooo wow.. This girl is me..Lol... Just different houses...

Are u sure she is cheating?. I'm extremly loyal to a fault... If i did cheat, i would end the relationship...

I don't handle guilt well..lol

Our charts are very similar... Just the houses are different..
 

StillOne

Well-known member
I'm throwing out a guess that it was a couple years back or so as Neptune went into opposition with her Mars. I'm probably wrong, but that's my guess based on my limited knowledge.

Looking forward to hearing others ideas.
 

Rageypoo

Well-known member
She has in her natal chart tons of aspects that show loyalty, that's no doubt, but saturn retro opposite chiron in 7th and 8th house stellium is a good place to start.

You say it was a few years ago? Well a few years ago she didn't "cheat" but entered into a 2 almost 3 year relationship, long after we stopped talking. I'd look a bit more recent, like around December of 2011 and on to present ; )

Strangely she has both uranus AND saturn trining venus, making her loyal but also noncommital...weird!
 
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StillOne

Well-known member
You say it was a few years ago? Well a few years ago she didn't "cheat" but entered into a 2 almost 3 year relationship, long after we stopped talking. I'd look a bit more recent, like around December of 2011 and on to present ; )

Ah, yes, I suppose when I said "a couple" that it could be taken to mean "a few"... I did mean 2 (possibly 3). According to merriam-webster's online dictionary "a couple" could mean anywhere from 2-5... Kinda redefines what it means to be a couple I'd say! :unsure: :andy: :w00t:
 

Rageypoo

Well-known member
Ah, yes, I suppose when I said "a couple" that it could be taken to mean "a few"... I did mean 2 (possibly 3). According to merriam-webster's online dictionary "a couple" could mean anywhere from 2-5... Kinda redefines what it means to be a couple I'd say! :unsure: :andy: :w00t:

well you were spot on really, I mean as I said it wasn't cheating but she did enter a really long relationship with a substance abuser (makes sense with neptune opposite mars, it's quite possible she engaged in the same abuse as well).

we have dated for about 6 years total (on and off), the start of our relationship was around the beginning of 2007, but we only just recently started talking in december 2011 once, then again in jun of 2012, then finally seriously talking on november 16th 2012.
 

Vista

Well-known member
I sort of breezed through the posts so I apologize if I repeat anything. I agree with the observation of T Neptune to Mars to start. I also feel T Pluto moving over the ASC and the planets placed there is a factor as well. My guess would be 2010 for the cheating. Also, I am not convinced she is as loyal as you think....Moon(7th ruler) in Leo conjunct Mercury(dual sign), so no, it's not a surprise to me. In addition to this, she has the planet of freedom and unpredictability right smack on her ASC opposing her DES/Jupiter(the planet of abundance). This girl likes what is unavailable despite you two having made it for 7 years.
 

Rageypoo

Well-known member
I sort of breezed through the posts so I apologize if I repeat anything. I agree with the observation of T Neptune to Mars to start. I also feel T Pluto moving over the ASC and the planets placed there is a factor as well. My guess would be 2010 for the cheating. Also, I am not convinced she is as loyal as you think....Moon(7th ruler) in Leo conjunct Mercury(dual sign), so no, it's not a surprise to me. In addition to this, she has the planet of freedom and unpredictability right smack on her ASC opposing her DES/Jupiter(the planet of abundance). This girl likes what is unavailable despite you two having made it for 7 years.

Looking more directly at the chart, is there anything to suggest that perhaps she has some abuse from her early childhood? If you do a current tri-wheel you can see her Pallas is conj her natal pallas right now and it forms a grand square to saturn/chiron/lillith/pallas in 3rd (possibly involving her sisters too). Could she be re-living some past trauma? what do you guys think?

We stopped dating in late 2007 and was on and off constantly till early 2009.

so her chart doesn't show ANY loyalty? Is she really that messed up? in 2010 (we hadn't talked for at least a year I'd imagine) she established a relationship with another man that lasted almost 3 years, we have only recently started talking in Nov.

why are all Leo's so untrustworthy!?
 
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StillOne

Well-known member
why are all Leo's so untrustworthy!?

I don't think this is necessarily the case. I think it has to do with how you come together and the forces (planets) at work.

I noticed in the composite that Neptune is conjunct the Ascendant. Robert Hand says of this placement:

At its highest, this aspect indicates that there is a strong spiritual bond between you. An invisible thread links the two of you together, so that without having to say very much, you each can feel what the other is thinking. You would be willing to do almost anything for each other. You feel as if you have been truly united into one being, which is ultimately the highest form of love.

Unfortunately, such an ideal bond is not usually realized. More commonly this aspect indicates a relationship in which there is an unusual amount of illusion and self-deception. The beautiful selflessness of the ideal is corrupted into self-martyrdom, which is often used as a means of controlling the other.
 

aquarius7000

Well-known member
Hi,

I agree with StillOne on the Neptune bit in the composite. Don't know how I missed it, but, for sure, given the tight Nep-Asc conjunction in the composite, Nep-related issues (yes, issues, not just themes) are at the forefront of this relationship. Unfortunately, Nep, on the downside involves deception and disappointment. Nep also means that one often does not/cannot know where things stand. There is this quality of 'slipping away' attached to Nep. The Asc ruler, Sat (totally opposite in nature and quality to the likes of Nep), is weak in the chart to combat this. It joys in the 12th (which increases its malefic nature), but is rx, and not in one of the signs, which would give it strength.

The composite also otherwise, IMO, does not show much staying power relationship wise. Venus and Mars in fickle and unstable Gemini. Ven opp Ura can be exciting, but is also one of the most unstable factors for a relationship.

I think that the Sun-Moon trine (a basic man-woman attraction) and the Plu-Moon (magnet-like attraction) sextile are the two main factors that have kept the two involved parties, well, involved with eachother every now and then. But the tenacity seems to be missing in the chart. I think that to handle the forceful Nep energy, both due to the planet's placement bang on the Asc, and the grand trine it forms with both the lights in the composite, a certain level of maturity, which usually comes with 'the years' is needed. Relationships with Sat or Nep or Plu on the Asc, or otherwise prominently involved, do well in later years, or at least after 38-40.

:)AQ7
 

Vista

Well-known member
I never suggested Leo's are untrustworthy, quite the opposite as a matter of fact. What I am saying in general with mostly Leo men or Leo ASC/Moon, I have found them to be playboys as a general rule and I am guessing it's similar with the women. They like admiration and praise and to be center stage. BUT, once they commit they are in 100% in it without waver and will swim through shark infested waters to save their mate.

I noticed Mars is also conjunct the Moon/Mer conjunction, I missed that. Mother issues. IMO, the freedom needs come from the opposition of her Uranus conjunct her ASC opposing her Des. This could point to fast starts to relationships, on/off, abrupt endings, liking people who aren't available which could manifest in many different ways, i.e. they live far away, emotionally unavailable, married, not interested, etc. Another manifestation could be not loving the one you are with or the grass is greener elsewhere, she could create situations where she subconsciously pushes her partner away and they start to lose interest and this will incite her interest again as she has to "win" that person interest back. There usually is some sort of imbalance in relationships she is in, she likes the person more or they like her more, it could shift back and forth. Uranus likes to create unpredictability and with it sitting on her ACS opposing her DES, there is a likelihood of that happening. Now, Saturn is there with Neptune too which creates an interesting dynamic. Rose colored glasses mixed with the planet of coldness and harsh reality. Perhaps this helps offset the Uranus influence. I am guessing she might live out all of these traits with different relationships.

To answer your other questions, I would not be surprised if she was abused. I look to the ruler of the 4th or 12th houses and planets places inside. The outer planets most notably Saturn, Uranus, and Pluto in hard aspect to the 4th or 12th house rulers typically points to some kind of abuse or neglect. Saturn is usually and absent parent or one that is extremely cold to the child. Uranus is as I said above, unstable and unpredictable, sometimes physical abuse; (Pluto is also abuse including sexual?, Neptune points to substance abuse typically by one of the childs caretakers/parent. You have her 12th house ruler Sag/Jupiter opposing Uranus, Saturn, and Neptune. I would say it's definitely a possibility, whether it's sexual, emotional, physical, substance abuse, or a combination it's hard to say. Have you asked her?

Looking more directly at the chart, is there anything to suggest that perhaps she has some abuse from her early childhood? If you do a current tri-wheel you can see her Pallas is conj her natal pallas right now and it forms a grand square to saturn/chiron/lillith/pallas in 3rd (possibly involving her sisters too). Could she be re-living some past trauma? what do you guys think?

We stopped dating in late 2007 and was on and off constantly till early 2009.

so her chart doesn't show ANY loyalty? Is she really that messed up? in 2010 (we hadn't talked for at least a year I'd imagine) she established a relationship with another man that lasted almost 3 years, we have only recently started talking in Nov.

why are all Leo's so untrustworthy!?
 
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Rageypoo

Well-known member
I never suggested Leo's are untrustworthy, quite the opposite as a matter of fact. What I am saying in general with mostly Leo men or Leo ASC/Moon, I have found them to be playboys as a general rule and I am guessing it's similar with the women. They like admiration and praise and to be center stage. BUT, once they commit they are in 100% in it without waver and will swim through shark infested waters to save their mate.

I noticed Mars is also conjunct the Moon/Mer conjunction, I missed that. Mother issues. IMO, the freedom needs come from the opposition of her Uranus conjunct her ASC opposing her Des. This could point to fast starts to relationships, on/off, abrupt endings, liking people who aren't available which could manifest in many different ways, i.e. they live far away, emotionally unavailable, married, not interested, etc. Another manifestation could be not loving the one you are with or the grass is greener elsewhere, she could create situations where she subconsciously pushes her partner away and they start to lose interest and this will incite her interest again as she has to "win" that person interest back. There usually is some sort of imbalance in relationships she is in, she likes the person more or they like her more, it could shift back and forth. Uranus likes to create unpredictability and with it sitting on her ACS opposing her DES, there is a likelihood of that happening. Now, Saturn is there with Neptune too which creates an interesting dynamic. Rose colored glasses mixed with the planet of coldness and harsh reality. Perhaps this helps offset the Uranus influence. I am guessing she might live out all of these traits with different relationships.

To answer your other questions, I would not be surprised if she was abused. I look to the ruler of the 4th or 12th houses and planets places inside. The outer planets most notably Saturn, Uranus, and Pluto in hard aspect to the 4th or 12th house rulers typically points to some kind of abuse or neglect. Saturn is usually and absent parent or one that is extremely cold to the child. Uranus is as I said above, unstable and unpredictable, sometimes physical abuse; (Pluto is also abuse including sexual?, Neptune points to substance abuse typically by one of the childs caretakers/parent. You have her 12th house ruler Sag/Jupiter opposing Uranus, Saturn, and Neptune. I would say it's definitely a possibility, whether it's sexual, emotional, physical, substance abuse, or a combination it's hard to say. Have you asked her?

I have asked her, but I'm not entirely sure I have the whole story, BOTH the parents were substance abusers, and I'm not sure about the physical abuse.

I suppose the cheating makes sense, I mean she claims we were under an "exclusive" rule but since it wasn't "official bf/gf" perhaps she feels that it was ok? Talking to her I think she is just very confused and young, and doesn't know what she wants, and hasn't moved past her previous relationship yet. It is possible since he is a substance abuser as well, she identifies with him more and is pushed to be with him? Who knows, in any case it's hard to say because we haven't been able to spend enough time for her to open up in that way, despite our long years of on/off affairs, I have only spent about a total of 4-5 months and then another 3 recently with her as far as being "steady" in my lifetime.

Why does it feel then there is more to us than the composite suggests? I can't believe fully this relationship is never going to launch, but is it simply that she has not made that full 100% commitment that this cheating happened in the first place? I almost feel she is still committed to her ex, but has strong feelings for me because I fulfill something missing, and essentially together we make 1 "complete" man? I hope that's not the case because that's not ok to do, but if anyone has looked at her transits, with pluto rocking over her neptune/saturn right now, and squaring her progressed venus, I imagine she's got a lot of learning to do right now and she's very, very confused on who she is.

Thanks everyone for looking into this, more insight is needed so please read away, I'm getting mixed views, some say this chart has long-term and some say none at all, so lets debate!
 
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StillOne

Well-known member
Have you looked at the synastry biwheel chart? I like this chart since it lines up your aspects and houses. I find it very telling. I only look at the composite to see if there are themes that carry over from the synastry. The composite is a mid-point chart and sometimes placements there don't make complete sense (Mercury too far away from the Sun for example).

I see you included the grid of the synastry. I still like looking at the chart tho. First thing I saw looking at the grid was Sun opp Moon... Then I noticed all the squares... Your personals square some of her outers. Her personals square some of your outers. There's a lot of squares in this synastry.
 
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Rageypoo

Well-known member
Have you looked at the synastry biwheel chart? I like this chart since it lines up your aspects. I find it very telling. I only look at the composite to see if there are themes that carry over from the synastry. The composite is a mid-point chart and sometimes placements there don't make complete sense (Mercury too far away from the Sun for example).

I have looked at the synastry biwheel, and with neptune and uranus squaring my venus/mars as hard as it does, I understand the difficulties invovled. I do however see my pluto trines, sextiles, and conj quite a bit, and saturn squares her nodes, moon square ascendant, moon square nodes, there is definitely staying aspects in synastry. My neptune also trines many of her planets and conj her uranus/saturn/neptune.

Here's the bi-wheel for u guys to see.

synastrybiwheelf.jpg


I understand the squares, what I don't understand is why we keep coming back, why haven't we moved on after all these years, why do we keep coming together, and why is it so great when we are in it??
 
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StillOne

Well-known member
Well, first of all there's something weird about the synastry "grid" that you posted cause astro.com isn't drawing oppositions in from the Sun to the Moon, etc...

So here's my thought. There's a lot of Pluto going on for you at the moment. T Pluto conjunct your Asc. Saturn just passed your N Pluto and will probably Rx and station on it. Her Pluto Squares your Merc. Can you say transformation? The Universe is asking you to evolve. Pluto imparts a lot of magnetism and excitement. I think it's the reason you keep coming together. There exists drama here. Roller coaster type stuff that's addicting. When you're in it, it's intense and engaging. When you don't have it, you're bored and missing it.

I recently had a similar relationship to you in the sense that we broke up and came back together many times. It was over a shorter period but I think we split something like 5 or 6 times. What I learned from this relationship was immense. She's the reason I'm on this board. She helped me awaken to my true self. There was a lot of Pluto, Neptune, karma and 12th house stuff going on between us.

There's something bigger at work here IMO...
 
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Vista

Well-known member
Rageypoo,

Not to sound negative, but I don't think you need astrology to know where this is going. You have spent all these years connected or wondering about her yet you have only spent a total of 4-5 months together. I think she is a little damaged and maybe she is playing into your need to rescue, not suggesting she isn't a good person but I don't think she has what it takes to give you what you want for all the reasons I described earlier. You might be setting yourself up to be hurt, but of course that is your prerogative. Out of all the women out there, why are you so focused on her? I bet if she knew you were more serious about someone she would be more interested. It seems she knows she has you in her back pocket. Her background and her desire to have what she can't have will make her a bad bet for long-term. I would suggest you distance yourself from her.

I have asked her, but I'm not entirely sure I have the whole story, BOTH the parents were substance abusers, and I'm not sure about the physical abuse.

I suppose the cheating makes sense, I mean she claims we were under an "exclusive" rule but since it wasn't "official bf/gf" perhaps she feels that it was ok? Talking to her I think she is just very confused and young, and doesn't know what she wants, and hasn't moved past her previous relationship yet. It is possible since he is a substance abuser as well, she identifies with him more and is pushed to be with him? Who knows, in any case it's hard to say because we haven't been able to spend enough time for her to open up in that way, despite our long years of on/off affairs, I have only spent about a total of 4-5 months and then another 3 recently with her as far as being "steady" in my lifetime.

Why does it feel then there is more to us than the composite suggests? I can't believe fully this relationship is never going to launch, but is it simply that she has not made that full 100% commitment that this cheating happened in the first place? I almost feel she is still committed to her ex, but has strong feelings for me because I fulfill something missing, and essentially together we make 1 "complete" man? I hope that's not the case because that's not ok to do, but if anyone has looked at her transits, with pluto rocking over her neptune/saturn right now, and squaring her progressed venus, I imagine she's got a lot of learning to do right now and she's very, very confused on who she is.

Thanks everyone for looking into this, more insight is needed so please read away, I'm getting mixed views, some say this chart has long-term and some say none at all, so lets debate!
 
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