Will we have a successful marriage?

Hiya Gang!

Ok… This board is LITERALLY my counselor… Here is where I get the nitty gritty about me…. good or bad… I've been dreading asking this question because… I partly am afraid of the answer. So here goes…

My relationship with my current boyfriend (we use fiancé as well even though he is still paying on the ring and hasn't OFFICIALLY popped the question) didn't start off with the odds in our favor to say the least. Our composite chart has saturn AND pluto in the 5th house. Since we have a child, I know that it didn't' affect our ability to conceive, however, I think it played out in a manner of… "No superficial bullish*t that you two had with everyone else… IF you want this to work you HAVE to be REAL (Saturn) because the old ways of relating to people are no longer going to work (Pluto)… And once you do change it will be for better and for good… And that's pretty much been our experience… We have had terrible arguments while learning each other and have BOTH grown tremendously and made changes.

Now… He's been 'married' (more to please mom) before and I have not. I had never really wanted to be married… something about the 'loss of control/loss of me' fear I guess… And I know there is a commitment issue within me somewhere… Not that I want to be unfaithful.. But I'm just scared of TOTALLY losing control and 'having the rug pulled from under me'. I guess I thought that I would meet someone and like magic… I would WANT to just give in… But I feel that ultimately it's a decision I'm going to make. He's considering the air force, so the talk of marriage has become everyday conversation instead of the silence that I would previously give the topic. The more we're together…the more I 'can see' our future (air force-security) the more I'm OK with making the commitment… I have had a problem leaving when it was time and "settling for crumbs" (jupiter retrograde in 8th") so i guess I don't want to feel 'trapped' in a relationship as I had before. I'm also continuing to 'battle' inner demons of My parent's relationship, previous relationships, and my relationship with my dad. I've made great progress as I'm learning to identify ME and how MY relationship should be… Not comparing it to others.

(Bear with me) So if all goes accordingly, he will enlist next year and we will marry before… causing us to move and relocate and begin a new life. I will no longer have the COMFORT IN KNOWLEDGE mommy and daddy 15 minutes away… Instead… it would now just be me and my husband and family. I know I still have work on myself to do… and I'm very open and communicative to him about things that I've been through and we've had to learn patience with each other. Being a Taurus, change doesn't come easy… nor with him LEO… but I'm making them.

I asked the question will our marriage be successful because it's not just he and I to consider, there are also the lives of 3 children at stake here as well.

So…this is the first I've tried to interpret a relationship chart… and I haven't got a clue as to how the planets apply here… He is ruled by mercury and mercury is in the first with venus… so that's a good thing? Moon in scorpio in 11th… Suggesting my fears? loss of control? representing military? Mars in second in aquarius representing money earned thru 11th house activities organization?

Any help… advice would be appreciated… we're not perfect… but we're trying… I think.

To me...I honestly don't see it.

You = Jupiter / Moon
Him = Mercury
P. of Marriage = Venus (this signifies the relationship)

The part of marriage (formula I use: Asc+Desc-Venus), in 21° taurus, so venus as its dispositor. Venus is in a Cardinal sign...usually not much stability there, usually quick love that burns out fast.

You, Jupiter (ruler of 1st), retrograde in the 8th house, that shows your fears. Also...the moon in scorpio (its sign of fall) and in via combusta, you have been depressed about this lately. So you seem to be having second thoughts perhaps?

Mercury is inside the 1st house, he is clearly in love with you...so yeah he is all-in with this.

So...because of the condition of jupiter and the moon, the problem is, like you mentioned, you. The jupiter retrograde clearly shows you looking at past things, wanting to "run away" from it.

I really don't see much of a problem, as the guy is totally in love with oyu (his planet inside your 1st house), but you on the other hand are the one in doubt-

The chart wouldn't suggest much of a future...because the planet that signifies the relationship is in a cardinal sign...as in, the chart would suggest you are going to freak out and blow it.

Of course it is interesting, because the chart is pretty much saying you are going to do...what you are afraid you are going to do.

So it is your choice here...choose to behave as usual, or try to give it a shot.

Some questions don't really have an answer because they involve your own free will. So...it is you who has to choose to make it work or not.

Hope it helps

umm Dirius

Merc is cap is different than Merc in sag sitting in 1st.
i dont see a marriage here

moon squared mars and will square jupiter

Tika the first line of my post was: "To me...I honestly don't see it.". So I agree it probably won't happen.

Mercury still in the 1st, still in love with her. Capricorn is jupiter's fall, so he is probably also aware and freaked out by her indecision and that, but still in love with her.

I mean, you can be crazy about someone, yet be angry/sad/hurt because of them.

But anyways I don't see a marriage either, like I said, their relationship in capricorn, cardinal sign, going to be a fast relationship, not stable.

Besides I agree with you, no aspect, not happening

Of course the OP has the power to change this, because she is probably going to be the one responsible for this not happening...

Dirius said:

Tika the first line of my post was: "To me...I honestly don't see it.". So I agree it probably won't happen.

Mercury still in the 1st, still in love with her. Capricorn is jupiter's fall, so he is probably also aware and freaked out by her indecision and that, but still in love with her.

I mean, you can be crazy about someone, yet be angry/sad/hurt because of them.

But anyways I don't see a marriage either, like I said, their relationship in capricorn, cardinal sign, going to be a fast relationship, not stable.

Besides I agree with you, no aspect, not happening

Of course the OP has the power to change this, because she is probably going to be the one responsible for this not happening...

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Because of the nature of how our relationship began (he was leaving a marriage, but still married by paper) I had doubts… Because I had gotten pregnant FAIRLY quickly… I was afraid… I have 2 other children and wasted YEARS of my life trying to make it work with their fathers in which they were NOT in love with me… for the right reasons anyway… The problem that I need to fix is my fear of letting go and control because I feel that no one can really just love me for me… But he's been showing me that… I understand that with my 'ability' i have the power to visualize and manifest… So you're right Dirius. THANK YOU for your interpretation… I don't want to blow this… I think the 'quick love fades fast' was more indicative of our relationship in the beginning… It was Fun… I was HEAVILY in honeymoon period/la la land… then **** got serious… and serious FAST… and I was no longer 'in love'… I had to LEARN how to love him for the lack of materialistic possessions he had at the time… I had to LEARN how to GENUINELY love him for him…. It's been a hard process… factoring my upbringing and things that I've gone thru. I know that horary is for a period of time… I'm not really certain how long… But your response answers what I wanted to know and is very indicative of my state of mind now. Our journey to start this 'new life' begins at the new year. The more the days go by…the more i'm learning to let go of the fears that I have. Soooo… I'll probably be asking this again next year once the time approaches.

Dirius said:

To me...I honestly don't see it.

You = Jupiter / Moon
Him = Mercury
P. of Marriage = Venus (this signifies the relationship)

The part of marriage (formula I use: Asc+Desc-Venus), in 21° taurus, so venus as its dispositor. Venus is in a Cardinal sign...usually not much stability there, usually quick love that burns out fast.

You, Jupiter (ruler of 1st), retrograde in the 8th house, that shows your fears. Also...the moon in scorpio (its sign of fall) and in via combusta, you have been depressed about this lately. So you seem to be having second thoughts perhaps?

Mercury is inside the 1st house, he is clearly in love with you...so yeah he is all-in with this.

So...because of the condition of jupiter and the moon, the problem is, like you mentioned, you. The jupiter retrograde clearly shows you looking at past things, wanting to "run away" from it.

I really don't see much of a problem, as the guy is totally in love with oyu (his planet inside your 1st house), but you on the other hand are the one in doubt-

The chart wouldn't suggest much of a future...because the planet that signifies the relationship is in a cardinal sign...as in, the chart would suggest you are going to freak out and blow it.

Of course it is interesting, because the chart is pretty much saying you are going to do...what you are afraid you are going to do.

So it is your choice here...choose to behave as usual, or try to give it a shot.

Some questions don't really have an answer because they involve your own free will. So...it is you who has to choose to make it work or not.

Hope it helps

Click to expand...

I've been depressed lately about us because he would prefer that I be home and raise our son. I would prefer to be home and make money. He takes care of the home and with the holidays.. there has just not been much extra to take on 'mommie's new business idea'. So in order to support any business.. I have to work.. which causes conflict in my home because he doesn't want me to. Going to the air force is the way to provide better every one… so maybe once things are in motion there will be no worry about us and our future.

tikana said:

umm Dirius

Merc is cap is different than Merc in sag sitting in 1st.
i dont see a marriage here

moon squared mars and will square jupiter

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You would TOTALLY be my BFF if you were here! I love your frankness! LOL… I know you'll give it to me straight… What he has mentioned does very much describe the CURRENT state of our relationship as I do have concerns/worry because it's a BIG STEP… and it's based on the state of our relationship NOW. I'm not certain how long this chart is 'active' for… But i do plan to ask the question again once things have 'changed' IDK if it will be different or not…. By things I mean… MY feelings (I don't want to blow it therefore I am SERIOUS about continuing to make the needed changes), our ACTUAL engagement when it's not just a talk that we're having, and once we have our day picked out.

okay soo

here is what bothers me

see that Jupiter sitting in 8th house - that is anxiety .. holding back or looking or a way out what will happen?

i'd say in about 11-12 months you will end this relaitonship because mars will oppose jupiter


right now merc is in control because merc is angular and cardinal

Jupiter is sitting and waiting!

Not much going on other than a break up

Tik

PS TaurusGal you dont want me near your fiance ... i'd be kicking his *** ..
you said "I've been depressed lately about us because he would prefer that I be home and raise our son. I would prefer to be home and make money. " That gives me an idea!i would wrap a blue baby bottle with his name on it and give it to him for Christmas! and on a Christmas card write

"Santa Klaus slipped (whatever the age your fiance is) under my tree,
I used to be an awful good girl, Santa baby,
So hurry down the chimney tonight!

Think of all the fun I've missed;
Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed;
Next year I could be just as good... please make this baby (Name) grow up!"


i cannot stand mommy's sons.. eeek infancy era is over, get over it!

T

tikana said:

okay soo

here is what bothers me

see that Jupiter sitting in 8th house - that is anxiety .. holding back or looking or a way out what will happen?

i'd say in about 11-12 months you will end this relaitonship because mars will oppose jupiter


right now merc is in control because merc is angular and cardinal

Jupiter is sitting and waiting!

Not much going on other than a break up

Tik

PS TaurusGal you dont want me near your fiance ... i'd be kicking his *** ..
you said "I've been depressed lately about us because he would prefer that I be home and raise our son. I would prefer to be home and make money. " That gives me an idea!i would wrap a blue baby bottle with his name on it and give it to him for Christmas! and on a Christmas card write

"Santa Klaus slipped (whatever the age your fiance is) under my tree,
I used to be an awful good girl, Santa baby,
So hurry down the chimney tonight!

Think of all the fun I've missed;
Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed;
Next year I could be just as good... please make this baby (Name) grow up!"


i cannot stand mommy's sons.. eeek infancy era is over, get over it!

T

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Lol... you are a hoot! What does the mars oppostie jupitet mean?

Dirius said:

To me...I honestly don't see it.

You = Jupiter / Moon
Him = Mercury
P. of Marriage = Venus (this signifies the relationship)

The part of marriage (formula I use: Asc+Desc-Venus), in 21° taurus, so venus as its dispositor. Venus is in a Cardinal sign...usually not much stability there, usually quick love that burns out fast.

You, Jupiter (ruler of 1st), retrograde in the 8th house, that shows your fears. Also...the moon in scorpio (its sign of fall) and in via combusta, you have been depressed about this lately. So you seem to be having second thoughts perhaps?

Mercury is inside the 1st house, he is clearly in love with you...so yeah he is all-in with this.

So...because of the condition of jupiter and the moon, the problem is, like you mentioned, you. The jupiter retrograde clearly shows you looking at past things, wanting to "run away" from it.

I really don't see much of a problem, as the guy is totally in love with oyu (his planet inside your 1st house), but you on the other hand are the one in doubt-

The chart wouldn't suggest much of a future...because the planet that signifies the relationship is in a cardinal sign...as in, the chart would suggest you are going to freak out and blow it.

Of course it is interesting, because the chart is pretty much saying you are going to do...what you are afraid you are going to do.

So it is your choice here...choose to behave as usual, or try to give it a shot.

Some questions don't really have an answer because they involve your own free will. So...it is you who has to choose to make it work or not.

Hope it helps

Click to expand...

When you say that I have the power to change this… as in… I have the choice to continue on 'THIS' path in which I asked the question… Or I have the choice to operate on 'THAT' path… In which I release myself from emotional/mental baggage… then we could work… If I'm understanding correctly… So.. IF I choose to operate on the 'new' path… would it void THESE predictions from the current path?

I see/read the expression 'OP has the power to change/overcome… most people can change but don't have the spiritual awareness to do so' a lot.. First… what is 'OP' mean? LOL… Second since the planets are still going to go the same course ANYWAY… how could free will affect the outcome? Is it how you choose to handle the influence of planetary energies even though they may be negative?

You know what's weird to me? How you can be afraid of marriage when you are already bound to the guy for LIFE because of a child? Like seriously, you can commit to having children with a guy but not marry him?

If he was gonna pull the rug out from under you he would have done so already when he found out you got pregnant so quickly..but he didn't so I think it's safe to say he's in it for the long haul.

You honestly don't even realize what you have here..like this guy is willing to marry you and raise your previous children, there are some women out there who can't even get a second look from a man because of being a single mom.

But hey according to the interpretations of the chart it's not going to work out anyway..so I probably just wasted a bunch of time writing all of this..oh well.

Good luck OP=Original poster

ProgressedMoonInScropio said:

You know what's weird to me? How you can be afraid of marriage when you are already bound to the guy for LIFE because of a child? Like seriously, you can commit to having children with a guy but not marry him?

If he was gonna pull the rug out from under you he would have done so already when he found out you got pregnant so quickly..but he didn't so I think it's safe to say he's in it for the long haul.

You honestly don't even realize what you have here..like this guy is willing to marry you and raise your previous children, there are some women out there who can't even get a second look from a man because of being a single mom.

But hey according to the interpretations of the chart it's not going to work out anyway..so I probably just wasted a bunch of time writing all of this..oh well.

Good luck OP=Original poster

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Well...If i were reading this post and making an assumption about someone's life... This would probably be weird to me too. Thanks for explaining OP!

hey Progressed

Cant you see Taurusgal wants to adopt him as an outgrown out of teenyears baby

Though the Via Combusta Moon is in a very wide quartile to Jupiter Rx, the retrograde ascendant lord is stating that the query should be diligently pursued.

But I'm going to have to go through some notes on why this should be and get back to this query later.

I well know TAURUSGAL is so perplexed by this!


ZadkielsGhost

ZadkielsGhost said:

Though the Via Combusta Moon is in a very wide quartile to Jupiter Rx, the retrograde ascendant lord is stating that the query should be diligently pursued.



But I'm going to have to go through some notes on why this should be and get back to this query later.

I well know TAURUSGAL is so perplexed by this!


ZadkielsGhost

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Thank you so Much for your insight

1) I agree with Dirius. You are going to do it. Mainly because you've already done it. You have how many children together? Once upon a time, marriage wasn't so much a thing. We had handfasting, and when we were too broke to do that we just lived together and raised a family. Marriage is a status change. It's a piece of paper. It does not change the commitment to each other nor does it grant anything other than a new way to file taxes. It feels like a big step, but really it's a ceremony where you do what you've already done.

2) Marriage isn't all sunshine and roses. You are essentially asking if you will stay together, and getting replies based on aspects. That doesn't fly. You are basically asking if stayng with this guy will make you happy for the rest of your life. Um, hello? That's a long time for one chart. I have it on good authority (like, mine,lol) that there will be days when you believe that this was the best thing you ever did, and then there will be years where you wonder why the frick you decided this was a good idea. Years when the only reason you stay together is because of financial reasons, or because you both love the kids and don't want to hurt them. Years when you wonder if you coulda been a contender if only....

3) Marriage is a career. It's a job, 24/7, and you have to work at it to make it work. If you have cold feet and think you have a better option now, then follow that better option. Otherwise, your significator is telling you what you already know. You don't want to give up your autonomy. But ducks, haven't you already?

4) I married a guy who made 6 figures. I had cold feet all the way to the alter (because I too have natal issues), and I only went to the alter because my second house was **** at the time and I was 6 1/2 months preggers when I lost my insurance because I got laid off from my job. Two years after I married him he decided to start another business that does not make six figures...I had his babies because I loved him. And I still do, 15 years and a whole lot of can we get divorced now under the bridge.

5) Your question would be better put to examining your natal chart and the synastry you share. Because you are asking if you two will be successful in a marriage, and that's still going to be up to you. A better horary question would be will I marry him? Yes. Will I love him every day of my life and be happy about it? Nope. Am I freaking the freak about about taking this giant step (that, horarists, involves moving, so look at the chart like a relo) yes.

honestly i dont like whole line of questioning here

Too many components

1. he hasnt proposed
2. you are automatically thinking he will marry you.
3. let's say you do get married, but then what..

which section of CA shall we look at?

HONESTLY, DON'T DO it. you might regret it.. because Jupiter retro in 8th house is not but a disaster for you
then you got a problem with Merc.. Merc never perfects with Venus and never does with the sun until merc goes retro on jan 30th.. then it goes combust

I see where Dirius and Tsmall are coming from but tsmall and i pretty much on the same page here it is not a happy marriage.. I doubt you want to end up in divorce court.

can you post your natal chart with transits and progressions please?

I wanna see this

tikana said:

can you post your natal chart with transits and progressions please?

I wanna see this

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My computer is down... I'm unable to post any charts... as soon as i get to one i will

tsmall said:

1) I agree with Dirius. You are going to do it. Mainly because you've already done it. You have how many children together? Once upon a time, marriage wasn't so much a thing. We had handfasting, and when we were too broke to do that we just lived together and raised a family. Marriage is a status change. It's a piece of paper. It does not change the commitment to each other nor does it grant anything other than a new way to file taxes. It feels like a big step, but really it's a ceremony where you do what you've already done.

2) Marriage isn't all sunshine and roses. You are essentially asking if you will stay together, and getting replies based on aspects. That doesn't fly. You are basically asking if stayng with this guy will make you happy for the rest of your life. Um, hello? That's a long time for one chart. I have it on good authority (like, mine,lol) that there will be days when you believe that this was the best thing you ever did, and then there will be years where you wonder why the frick you decided this was a good idea. Years when the only reason you stay together is because of financial reasons, or because you both love the kids and don't want to hurt them. Years when you wonder if you coulda been a contender if only....

3) Marriage is a career. It's a job, 24/7, and you have to work at it to make it work. If you have cold feet and think you have a better option now, then follow that better option. Otherwise, your significator is telling you what you already know. You don't want to give up your autonomy. But ducks, haven't you already?

4) I married a guy who made 6 figures. I had cold feet all the way to the alter (because I too have natal issues), and I only went to the alter because my second house was **** at the time and I was 6 1/2 months preggers when I lost my insurance because I got laid off from my job. Two years after I married him he decided to start another business that does not make six figures...I had his babies because I loved him. And I still do, 15 years and a whole lot of can we get divorced now under the bridge.

5) Your question would be better put to examining your natal chart and the synastry you share. Because you are asking if you two will be successful in a marriage, and that's still going to be up to you. A better horary question would be will I marry him? Yes. Will I love him every day of my life and be happy about it? Nope. Am I freaking the freak about about taking this giant step (that, horarists, involves moving, so look at the chart like a relo) yes.

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Thank you for your insight... I'll post more when my computer is able to get online