Is she having a clandestine affair with her male friend?

Marvel

Active member
Is she having an affair with her friend? We are about to move in together!

I have recently attracted a lovely women( who is a Virgo with Cancer rising Scorpio Moon) into my life whom I am committed to creating a progressive union with.

However, she has a male best friend who is an Aquarius (has Scorpio Moon), whom she known for a longer period of time before meeting me (college mates). I suspect that they may have had sexual relations (not sure to what capacity) and find myself intuitively concerned about their relationship.

She seems to be invested in his involvement in her life as a friend. So he comes along with the package. I am a Leo with a Leo rising and Virgo Moon/Venus. I've met this guy several times and find myself questioning his role in her life.

Please help me understand this circumstance before I make a full blown commitment! She is ready to move in with me pretty soon. I appreciate your feedback and clarity.
 

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cspencer

Banned
Re: Is she having an affair with her friend? We are about to move in together!

Please help me understand this circumstance before I make a full blown commitment! She is ready to move in with me pretty soon. I appreciate your feedback and clarity.

Why aren't you doing synastry? Synastry is best for examining long term relationships.
 

Slenkar

Well-known member
She is mars her friend is mercury
They are conjunct, but they're are not in the twelfth house
So maybe nothing secret is going on
 

tsmall

Premium Member
Re: Is she having an affair with her friend? We are about to move in together!

I have recently attracted a lovely women( who is a Virgo with Cancer rising Scorpio Moon) into my life whom I am committed to creating a progressive union with.

However, she has a male best friend who is an Aquarius (has Scorpio Moon), whom she known for a longer period of time before meeting me (college mates). I suspect that they may have had sexual relations (not sure to what capacity) and find myself intuitively concerned about their relationship.

She seems to be invested in his involvement in her life as a friend. So he comes along with the package. I am a Leo with a Leo rising and Virgo Moon/Venus. I've met this guy several times and find myself questioning his role in her life.

Please help me understand this circumstance before I make a full blown commitment! She is ready to move in with me pretty soon. I appreciate your feedback and clarity.

Do you suspect that they may have been intimate in the past, or are you concerned that they are having an affair now?

Personally I wouldn't answer this question for a querent. It would be better, best if you spoke of your concerns with your girlfriend. Her past is hers, and not something I would encourage the equivalent of astrological spying on.
 

tikana

Well-known member
i wouldnt touch it with 10 foot pole.
it is really non of your business
using horary to get intimate details like that is hihgly unethical
 

Slenkar

Well-known member
If they are about to move in together and he wants to know if she is having an affair now.

How is that unethical?

Saturn is in the seventh opposite the girlfriend and her friend which show that her current relationship is stopping her.

Pretty sure nothing secret is going on.

They are also both under sunbeams or combustion which shows the same thing.
 
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rafaella

Well-known member
To me it seems querent is asking whether his girlfriend is sleeping with her male friend now, not about the past....is that so Marvel?
 

tsmall

Premium Member
If they are about to move in together and he wants to know if she is having an affair now.

How is that unethical?

Re-read the post.

However, she has a male best friend who is an Aquarius (has Scorpio Moon), whom she known for a longer period of time before meeting me (college mates). I suspect that they may have had sexual relations (not sure to what capacity) and find myself intuitively concerned about their relationship.
She seems to be invested in his involvement in her life as a friend. So he comes along with the package. I am a Leo with a Leo rising and Virgo Moon/Venus. I've met this guy several times and find myself questioning his role in her life.


The querent is concerned because his girlfriend has a male best friend, which makes him uneasy. He is concerned that they may have been intimate in the past. Rather than ask her about it, he is asking for a free astrology reading to validate his suspicions. This is, in essence, a third party question, something any astrologer would hesitate to answer based on the limited information given. The best advice is for the querent to express his concerns to his girlfriend and have an open, honest conversation about what is bothering him, not to ask random amature astrologers on a public forum to confirm his fears.

We do not know what the situation is. We do not know what the querent may or may not do with the information given. And, we do NOT have the girlfriend's permission to explore her past.
 

Inline

Well-known member
Re: Is she having an affair with her friend? We are about to move in together!

..........................
 
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Marvel

Active member
Thank you for all your valuable feedback. Truth is I want to know if it happened in at all (past or present)

I've already inquired and gotten a "No" however, I find myself still not at ease b/c of the vibes Im getting from her friend during their company together.

I wont say my question is unethical. I am asking my fellow astrologers for insight before making a major life commitment. Perhaps these could be my internal challenges I must absolve however, I want to know if it ever happened as well to simple test her response. My aspect of Venus Trine Neptune can make relationships a form of sabotage I just want to be clear.

I notice Venus square Uranus in this chart does that indicate anything.
 

Slenkar

Well-known member
you are venus,
if uranus is square you, it means astrology thinks you are weird

The moon is also void of course which means nothing to worry about
 

Ladylike

Well-known member
Thank you for all your valuable feedback. Truth is I want to know if it happened in at all (past or present)

.

I can't help but thinking...Does it really matter ? How many of the people you have slept with in the past matters now ? Probably none ?

What matters is, that it is YOU she wants to be with and move in with. That is quite a statement. Does anything else really matter at the end of the day ?
 

rafaella

Well-known member
Thank you for all your valuable feedback. Truth is I want to know if it happened in at all (past or present)

I've already inquired and gotten a "No" however, I find myself still not at ease b/c of the vibes Im getting from her friend during their company together.

I wont say my question is unethical. I am asking my fellow astrologers for insight before making a major life commitment. Perhaps these could be my internal challenges I must absolve however, I want to know if it ever happened as well to simple test her response. My aspect of Venus Trine Neptune can make relationships a form of sabotage I just want to be clear.

I notice Venus square Uranus in this chart does that indicate anything.


Marvel,

follow your intuition, if you're picking something up, some vibe etc...I wouldn't discard that, I say this as I do see something in the chart that is not good.

Now, one thing I wanted to mention, her planet Mars is combust and its an applying combustion. What combustion does (among other things) is severely affect one's judgment and reasoning. So if you tried to discuss things with her, she will be very difficult to be reasoned with, she will not be able to see your point of view.

I do believe she has great affection for this person, he is Mercury, and she is in his sign. Perhaps she has friendship type affection for him, but this also shows she is not going to let go of him easily.

Combustion doesn't last forever, right now she will be difficult to be reasoned with, but after sometime, she will perhaps be able to understand where you're coming from.

I hope this can help you with this situation. All the best!
 

cspencer

Banned
I wont say my question is unethical.

But of course it is.

Horary will never over-ride your natal chart.

I am asking my fellow astrologers for insight before making a major life commitment.

Then you need to be looking at synastry.

Here's a synastry of birth charts with an explanation:

http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showpost.php?p=615851&postcount=9

Perhaps these could be my internal challenges I must absolve however, I want to know if it ever happened as well to simple test her response.

Assuming you would be married or engaged, the question you asked has a very specific and complicated delineation (which no one has come close to doing correctly).
 

Marvel

Active member
Marvel,

follow your intuition, if you're picking something up, some vibe etc...I wouldn't discard that, I say this as I do see something in the chart that is not good.

Now, one thing I wanted to mention, her planet Mars is combust and its an applying combustion. What combustion does (among other things) is severely affect one's judgment and reasoning. So if you tried to discuss things with her, she will be very difficult to be reasoned with, she will not be able to see your point of view.

I do believe she has great affection for this person, he is Mercury, and she is in his sign. Perhaps she has friendship type affection for him, but this also shows she is not going to let go of him easily.

Combustion doesn't last forever, right now she will be difficult to be reasoned with, but after sometime, she will perhaps be able to understand where you're coming from.

I hope this can help you with this situation. All the best!

FIrstly I want to thank everyone who is contributing to this post.
I find that I am understanding Horary Astrology throughout.

@ Rafaella - Thank You for your insight. I found this helpful to a degree.

How do you measure the time frame for this combustion? Does mercury in retrograde indicate any information?

When you are referring that she may be difficult to reason, is this in general or if I bring up the relationship between her and her friend?

If I decide to confront her on this will this activate her Martian attributes?
Plus Mars and Mercury is in Gemini - The possibility to be lied to?

When you say " I do see something in the chart that is not good", what are you referring to?

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@Tsmalls - You bring a valid point with regards to my coming on a forum with "amature astrologers" to investigate a suspicion I have without the permission of my girlfriend. I am asking for support for a community I wish grows progressively.

However, the reason I ask these questions b/c I am quite invested in building a life with her and want to eradicate the potential of being blindsided as I was in the past. This information will simply empower me with insight.

How would you feel if the person you love introduces to you a friend whom they had a past or/and current affair with without your knowledge? Given that you are going to allow them to live in your home. This friend of theirs is apart of their ecosystem and the merging of lives means I will have to allow room for such a person in mines.
Imagine having to that person smile in your face and eat at your table. Pardon my Leonian resolve.

I simply want to have perspective before allowing myself to be under deception.
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@Slenkar Thank you for understanding my plight - I would want to avoid moving in with such a situation.

Moon is Void - Means there is no affair?
Does asking a question during this phase equate an answer to being definite Yes or No?
:lol: @ astrology thinks im wierd!

You state saturn is preventing them from such an occurence. Does this mean a temporary breakup will activate such an event?

GENERAL QUESTION:In horary, Does the chart of a specific question claim dominance over such a situation?

Will the cycle of Saturn continue to prevent this or can its strength subside?

When a Sun is conjunct (sunbeams) and Mars in producing combustion, does this mean that if it were to occur it would immediately be seen?
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@inline Thank You for this advice. I worry how this inquiry may impact our relationship, hence my coming here to learn.

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Tessie

Banned
It is a toughie if you want to be with her but may have to lose her over something you do not know if it is happening. My vote is you have to be cut-throat (not-literally) on this on the basis of trust. She is either behaving in a way you are comfortable to experience for the rest of your lives or she is making you feel nervous and on edge. There will be situations in life where you may feel uncomfortable. However, your home should not be one of them. ♥
 

Slenkar

Well-known member
Moon is Void - Means there is no affair?
in my amateur opinion yes

As another person suggested I think you should do synastry, it does more than just tell you if you get along. It tells you if there will be deception.
 

JUPITERASC

Well-known member
When you are referring that she may be difficult to reason, is this in general
or if I bring up the relationship between her and her friend?

If I decide to confront her on this will this activate her Martian attributes?
Plus Mars and Mercury is in Gemini - The possibility to be lied to?


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@Tsmall - You bring a valid point with regards to my coming on a forum with "amature astrologers"
to investigate a suspicion I have without the permission of my girlfriend......

However, the reason I ask these questions b/c I am quite invested in building a life with her
and want to eradicate the potential of being blindsided as I was in the past.
This information will simply empower me with insight.

The insight that 'empowers' you
is insight that you are unlikely to share with your girlfriend
therefore
you are deceiving your girlfriend
and
also taking advice from amateur astrologers
who are responding to you in order to practice their skills
and whose advice is not infallible


How would you feel if the person you love
introduces to you a friend whom they had a past or/and current affair with
without your knowledge?
One wonders how your prospective girlfriend would feel if she discovered that
because you suspect her of a past or / and current affair
that she may not have had
and
that there is no evidence that she has had
i.e.
Keep in mind that we have not heard your prospective girlfriend's story.
we have heard only your suspicions

and

rather than discuss your fears and suspicions openly with your girlfriend
you are instead relying on unknown and complete strangers on a public online astrological forum
to work on the equivalent of unethical astrological spying on your behalf.

...Given that you are going to allow them to live in your home. .
This friend of theirs is apart of their ecosystem
and the merging of lives means I will have to allow room for such a person in mines.
Imagine having to that person smile in your face and eat at your table.
Pardon my Leonian resolve.

I simply want to have perspective before allowing myself to be under deception.
and so you are being deceptive towards your girlfriend
as well as deceptive towards "this friend of theirs"
while complaining that you suspect your prospective girlfriend of deception
:smile:

-------------------------------
@inline Thank You for this advice.
I worry how this inquiry may impact our relationship,
hence my coming here to learn.


-------------------------------
keep in mind that ours is an astrological learning forum
horary astrology takes time to learn
and so the advice you receive is far from infallible
and in fact forum rules explicitly state:

QUOTE

Ethical rules to observe:
Astrological data are highly sensitive.
We therefore ask you to take the protection of personal data of third persons very seriously.

Please know that you should take your own risks if you decide to trust someone else with their astrological services,
as this forum does not undertake any responsibility for any astrological services, especially those offered against a fee, via this forum in any form:
through public forums or chat, private messages or emails.

Also remember that this is a public forum,
indexed by search engines (Google, for instance),
so basically everything you post here is not only viewable by any other person,
but it also can be retrieved by a simple internet search.
 

tsmall

Premium Member
----------------
@Tsmalls -

it's "tsmall", though I suppose Tsmalls works as well as Smally, Biggie Smalls, and hey, even dr. farr called me Tsmail for a while there

You bring a valid point with regards to my coming on a forum with "amature astrologers" to investigate a suspicion I have without the permission of my girlfriend. I am asking for support for a community I wish grows progressively.

It is a valid point. The method cspenser referred to, as to how to delineate this complex question, arrose in a time when women were considered chattle, and had no right to privacy. Your girlfriend is not obligated to tell you everything about her life because you are looking to move in with her, not buy her. Horary isn't CarFax. You do not have the right to violate her privacy because you are "suspicious" that her male best friend might have been something more than a "friend" in the past.

However, the reason I ask these questions b/c I am quite invested in building a life with her and want to eradicate the potential of being blindsided as I was in the past.

Blindsided? Welcome to life. Wear a helmet.

This information will simply empower me with insight.

Yes, you mentioned that. You are looking to use an horary chart to test her veracity if/when you actually decide to ask her the question yourself. And you are looking to get "the facts" from a chart you, as the casting astrologer, don't know how to read, ready and willing to use any evidence provided by anonymous astrologers whose credentials you don't even know as proof of her lying. Salem Witch Trials, anyone?

How would you feel if the person you love introduces to you a friend whom they had a past or/and current affair with without your knowledge? Given that you are going to allow them to live in your home. This friend of theirs is apart of their ecosystem and the merging of lives means I will have to allow room for such a person in mines.
Imagine having to that person smile in your face and eat at your table. Pardon my Leonian resolve.

Honey, I've been married for 15 years, and with my husband for 18. There are still parts of my past he doesn't know, and parts of his I don't. I am great friends with almost all of the guys I've had serious relationships with before I met my current husband, including my ex-husband. He never questions my intent or intentions. It would never occur to him to violate my privacy, just as it would never occur to me to violate his. And seriously? I don't want to know all the intimate details of his past. He loves me, I love him, we have a family...it comes down to trust. Either you trust her, or you don't. And if you don't, then just stop right there. Because really, she deserves better. So do you, in the long run, but if you have trust issues to the extent that you are willing to ask complete strangers to verify your "intuition that a guy and a girl can't be best friends" in order to play "gotcha" with her when you actually ask her (or were you even planning to ask her?) then clearly there is something you need to work out on your own.

I simply want to have perspective before allowing myself to be under deception.

Then you need to spend more time with your own chart and less time with hers...oh, and that whole synastry chart comparison that has been proposed and endorsed by several? Yes. That.
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