Cancer Sun in the 11th
Virgo Asc.
Moon in Aquarius in the 6th:
(But as I have learn from this site, so it is so close to the cusp that some of it influence may be felt in the 5th, right?)
Anyway I am thinking today that some experiences in my childhood, my relationship with my mother influenced how I love, and specially, why I chose my husband.
And today is one of those days I am wishing I have know this facts of myself before, and are secretly a little resentful of her because of her detachment of me. Yes, I know: another Cancer cliché...
I think I subconciously look for people that are different and somewhat distant emotionally.
In fact, the first time I saw my now husband, I strangely admired the way he conducted himself and how prudent he was..., that, even back then, so young, it was a trait I looked in a potential mate.
Then I wish they where emotionally more close to me, something they in fact may never be able to give me. And then I feel lonely and try to detach myself from feelings to be able to go on, also escape through books/tv/internet. When it gets too hurtful, I try to exorcise myself through writing. It helps, but I keep delaying to be more productive with it because the "labor pains" are too much.
My husband is a Sag/Libra Moon-and if I guessed the time of birth correctly: the Moon may be in the first house Libra.
My Mom is a Libra with Moon in Leo.
I am hurting today (and not just emotional hurt: I've been battling a hurt back like 2 weeks now, on top of all). I think I'll never be satisfied with the love/ emotional response I receive from the ones I care about.
So today, I do not like my Moon, the same way I do not like the reflection of the mirror when I am like this: messy.