QUOTE=Tahnee67744;1135796] I´m a bloody mess, I can´t keep up with my house work, school work and at time work work.
I have a full time job at least but I still live at home, relationship with my parents and sisters is not great, I used to be more outgoing and caring to people but I have started to alienate myself from others and be more selfish (which I hate) I´m not sure how to change this.
Hi Tahnee,
I can understand very well how you actually feel yourself. And you are not alone with your feeling of alienating yourself. A lot of people with planets in taurus have it - since transit uranus as a fix air sign ruler entered fix sign taurus earth - and the taurus earth changed kinda over night to a different one.
Your personal manner of communication, your personal manner to think, to perceive information and to process information, your mental mind and intellect is 3rd house in fix sign taurus, ruled by venus in analytical and (self)critical sign of virgo in 7th house. 3rd house is also your physical body movement, your personal style of clothes you like - your facial guestures, your physical and energetical appearance and radiance, people can notice from you - and instinctively react on.
And 3rd house is also siblings and relationship with siblings. But 3rd house ruled by venus - is not transit-activated itself for action.
Taurus in 3rd house always has a sense of "together we are strong" and needs to feel accepted among those - one sees as family or one feels belonging to. Taurus in general hates it to feel alone and standing outside.
Taurus in 3rd house is an earth grounded energy and profound thinker, needing own personal time to understand something profoundly - but if so happened- never forget anything- keep it for long and is not known for an easy let go and not for welcoming changes with open arms. Taurus in 3rd needs visible and touchable facts to get convinced of something and to believe something.
In 3rd house is your natal saturn in - coming from high up in the sky- ruling 11th house - with saturn/uranus corresponding energy as a higher sense and perception antenna - downstairs into your 3rd house. Adding the energy, feeling and radiance of "being different" /of non-conventional standard.
With your feeling and thinking different saturn in 3rd house- you generally have a tendency with to feel yourself responsible for all and probably also easily guilty for all - even if you aren't.
In youth- saturn in 3rd - can make shy and inhibited to communicate - shy to be in the middle of the attention, shy to be looked at and watched, not wanting to make a mistake, hesitating because of not wanting to say something wrong - and to get blamed for it and laughed at.
Moreover and additionally your natal saturn is squared by your strong placed uranus in fix sign aquarius in 12th house - as ruler of 12th in 12th house in own sign and own house.
This is the most highest possible outlook for coming future event, prewarnings and the most highest sensitive perception antenna for outer influence- one can have in a chart. You feel a lot from outer influence and from other people with - and what issues people are dealing outside in public and society - but probably with difficulties - to sort out -what belongs to you and what to others. And then often being overwhelmed - not knowing -what is going on with you - from one second to the other.
But nevertheless this is an energy flow you are used to from birth on. The issue begins to start - if this flow is interrupted by a transiting planet - activating your natal saturn, opening up 11th house - saturn rules - social commitment and outer influence in public.
And this is what happened first time on 07/16/2021 when transit uranus has degree exact conjuncted your natal saturn for a considerable change in your life concerning to find your place in social commitment and to get and to feel yourself socialized (saturn rules 11th) and to take responsibility for your own and to see /feel yourself as an important part of the Grand Whole - having a task to fullfil and to give a personal contribution to it- to feel your life as senseful. You in principle are born for - neptune as your rising, personal enforcement and birth energy is in 11th house - social commitment.
To play a personal part over there - to save your financial income and physical existence - neptune squaring your jupiter in 2nd house as your midheaven, career,lifepath and vocation ruler.
Giving your taurus saturn more and a different weight now - squaring same time your natal uranus and interrupting your well known birth energy flow during transit time - which in the beginning feels "strange" and is always irritating in the beginning - getting afterwards step by step better. Feeling yourself probably even more like an alien in your environment and surroundings since then and now - and always kinda misunderstood. Transit lasting until /ending on 04/27/2022. You feel yourself different with - and others can notice it from you.
Short before - on 04/20/2021 transit saturn on the other end has activated your natal uranus in your 12th house - transit lasting until 01/10/2022. But not reaching exact degree of your natal saturn this year.
Was it around that time - when it started and you felt yourself different than before ?
.
You do have 
and can be too hard on yourself. You won't get along with everyone all the time & it's not always your fault.
can make a person wishy-washy, not sure who they are or what they want. Mirror affirmations & writing down all your good qualities will help. You are a passionate, emotional person with heavey water elements & extremely sensitive with 
. You probably need to spend more time alone than most to recharge your batteries as you soak up energy, both good & bad, like a sponge. Use sage when you feel depresssed or overwhelmed; it clears the energy. Or lemon, sandalwood, whatever lightens your mood.
placement. Do you know what you want to do? Are you following your true path? Is your education what you want?
