People that attract decent people vs people who don't

love-thinking

Well-known member
Can we discuss what aspects make someone attract good people as lovers and friends and what aspects cause another to attract terrible people as friends and lovers?
 

Lin

Well-known member
When it comes to what we attract we are really sort of at the mercy of our Moon, Mars and Venus and the aspects they make...esp. to the outer planets.
For friends we tend to live out the 11th house dynamics; for lovers, the 5th house, and for legal mates, the 7th house.

So the planets IN these houses and the planets that rule these houses and all the aspects they make tend to show us what is motivating our attractions.

Also: sometimes attraction is fueled by the current heavy transits. This is why sometimes we look back and say about a person we "loved" in the past, "WHAT was I thinking??" ::eek:
LIN
 
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Starsareround

Well-known member
I also think that attracting negative people comes down to self esteem. I would look at how strong the Sun is in addition to what Lin said, especially for hetro women or any one attracted to male energy.
 

GemwDepth

Account Closed
I also think that attracting negative people comes down to self esteem. I would look at how strong the Sun is in addition to what Lin said, especially for hetro women or any one attracted to male energy.

Also transits and progressions. e.g. I've noticed a definite pattern when Neptune is squaring my Sun. Types of people I've never attracted prior to that came in waves.
 

Starsareround

Well-known member
Also transits and progressions. e.g. I've noticed a definite pattern when Neptune is squaring my Sun. Types of people I've never attracted prior to that came in waves.




Oh, hell yeah! Neptune transits will have you doubting your BS detector big time!
...there was this guy I met during Neptune transit. So, so attractive but he would say odd things sometimes that got my red flags up. Ordinarily I would always just nip it anytime I got that vibe with someone, but Neptune kept me fooled :annoyed:
I ended up giving him a lot more time and energy than I ever should have, and I look back and think how odd that was...NEPTUNE...:alien:
 
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Lin

Well-known member
Yes, Neptune and even Uranus in transit to a personal planet can suddenly make one attracted to someone you would not have noticed or chosen at a different time.

Self esteem or self image has a LOT to do with the Moon. The mother is the first person to show us that we are loved, noticed, listened to, cherished.................or not.
LIN
 

Gemini888

Well-known member
Also transits and progressions. e.g. I've noticed a definite pattern when Neptune is squaring my Sun. Types of people I've never attracted prior to that came in waves.
I already have Neptune trine Sun so this is hardly a problem to me, because if I'm fooled, I've already been fooled since forever. I already knew how to deal with that kind of energy.
 

Witchyone

Well-known member
I attract all different kinds of people, and I don't mean romantically, necessarily. I think it's probably the 1st house sun with Taurus ascendant. I seem approachable, which was a nightmare to me as a kid because I was very shy. I think it comes down to boundaries mostly. When my boundaries are up, shady people are less likely to approach and even if they do, my closed-off response acts as a barrier.
 

wan

Well-known member
Also transits and progressions. e.g. I've noticed a definite pattern when Neptune is squaring my Sun. Types of people I've never attracted prior to that came in waves.

Wait, what? You sound like there's been many times that your Neptune has squared your Sun. Isn't Neptune a very slow moving planet?
 

BlackLioness87

Well-known member
Wait, what? You sound like there's been many times that your Neptune has squared your Sun. Isn't Neptune a very slow moving planet?
When a planet goes retrograde it steps the same degree twice, so you can have the same aspect twice in a relatively short time span.
 

greybeard

Well-known member
Actually, in some cases, a retrograde planet touches the same degree 3 times, not 2. Neptune takes about a year to go through the retrograde cycle with a span of about 3 degrees.
 
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ardentika

Well-known member
Eh.. what is good and bad anyways. It's all a matter of perspective so it's hard to say. You attract what you are and what you can offer, so if you attract bad friends or lovers maybe its time to look within and see why xD
 

GemwDepth

Account Closed
Wait, what? You sound like there's been many times that your Neptune has squared your Sun. Isn't Neptune a very slow moving planet?

Just rereading this thread back from a month ago, and I forgot I had commented.

What I was originally saying was that transits and progressions also matter a great deal, in terms of people that comes into one's life.

Progressions move very slowly, and I've seen, in fact, one pattern on this very site that will last decades. In my personal life I have a current pattern (a private one) I've calculated to last about 8-9 years. It begin with an influx of characters I have never encountered previously in my life; one or two instances I can and will ignore. But it got to the point where I could no longer ignore this pattern of people and events, and all my previous defenses I've learnt and accumulated thus far in life no longer worked with the new crop...

That was when I took the plunge to figure out what was going on, why, what I needed to do to cope, and what new tools I needed to learn. Basically I stopped sitting there and took intentional action. I've reached some private conclusions analyzing the matter, both in real life and the astrological signatures.

And true to the progressed pattern, the further the orb the less the impact. It was the most active when the degrees were exact to 2 degree orb. But I know it will be 8-9 years before this new crop of characters will be gone from my life, for good. In the main time, this puppy needs to learn new tricks; to both deal and conquer. :cool:

And I gave an example of Neptune squaring Sun, in the Pisces-Gemini phases right now. But that was just one off-hand example for my main point.

What I do not have is a precise (and I mean precise) picture of influence, causation and weight. For that, it will be the domain of astrological research, much more examples, and no doubt the realm of the 'greats'. For example, I remember Celeste Teal once said she will need to see the existence of 3 similar patterns in transit, progression, etc., before she will make a definite prediction that anything will transpire. As there are so many planetary configurations at any given time, and most of it never actually ignite into any ostensible events.

I like Witchy's point above about boundaries, and a Neptune squaring Sun transit would definitely erode one's boundaries, and perhaps cause both negative people to seek opportunism (an easy mark) and cause a native's lack of ability to discern and take action. That's one explanation for attracting an increased level of shady characters, but it's still reactionary.

What I've seen from progressed patterns though, is more cardinal/angularity, for lack of a better word. Things actively happen to you, without you doing much to have 'attracted' it. Again, it goes back to my point of what is still imprecise.
.
 

love-thinking

Well-known member
Eh.. what is good and bad anyways. It's all a matter of perspective so it's hard to say. You attract what you are and what you can offer, so if you attract bad friends or lovers maybe its time to look within and see why xD

How's that true when codependents/empaths attract narcissists quite a lot?
 

ardentika

Well-known member
How's that true when codependents/empaths attract narcissists quite a lot?

Because most of the times codependent people are such who would undermine their own value out of fear of being alone. So again you attract exactly what you are. Someone undermining your value and playing with you. A person with normal self esteem would never attract such a person, even if they do they won't fall in the trap. To change the people you attract you gotta change yourself and astrology can help you with that.

In this case its not even about codependency or empaths I feel more as it is about self worth and self esteem. I am too somewhat codependent and an empath when I want to and I can tell a narcissist a mile away and just know to keep them within healthy boundaries.
 

aniyas

Well-known member
Agreed with ardentika. I've struggled a great deal with self-esteem and self-negation, and throughout my youth I CONSTANTLY attracted people who could not bear to shift attention away from themselves and their achievements, and were extremely manipulative (some I could categorise as narcissists with some certainty). I also kept attracting people with rage issues. Astrology helped me grow personally, take a hard look at some latent unpleasantries within my own self, and I haven't encountered / put up with that sort of thing in quite a while while being comfortable with my sensitivity.

I think it's incorrect to simply say that empaths attract narcissists. While the two might feel drawn to each other, whether or not an empath responds to this desire to connect is a direct function of how self-aware and secure they are in their styles of attachment. If positive, it won't evolve into a friendship or relationship in the first place.
 
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BlackLioness87

Well-known member
Actually, in some cases, a retrograde planet touches the same degree 3 times, not 2. Neptune takes about a year to go through the retrograde cycle with a span of about 3 degrees.
Yeap, a planet only touches twice the exact degree/longitude where it was placed before engaging "retrograde" motion. I.E. My Saturn return hit me three times, tr Saturn engaged retro motion some degrees ahead natal Saturn. But when tr Chiron was on my DSC it went retrograde when it was still close to my DSC. Chiron transiting my DSC only hit me twice, though the first hit lasted longer.
 
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