waybread
Well-known member
Oh, c'mon.
Magnolia, either you're pulling our collective legs, or you haven't spent a lot of time in the world of work.
If you are familiar with magic (magick) then you're very aware of the boomerang effect.
Help needed in dealing with problematic Scorpios.
- Thread starter AstroAssist
- Start date
Oh, c'mon.
Magnolia, either you're pulling our collective legs, or you haven't spent a lot of time in the world of work.
If you are familiar with magic (magick) then you're very aware of the boomerang effect.
waybread
Well-known member
AstroAssist, Thanks, I did get your PM and will respond to the astrology there.
I can't say that any of the following will work, but these were the HR department's recommended SOP at my former place of employment-- on a good day, that is.
Perhaps your best assets will be your ability to face your boss's unwanted behaviours with a sense of humour to diffuse tense situations, and ways of letting him know how you support his career goals and portfolio in your organization.
If you think you're past that stage:
I obviously don't know much about your particular situation and workplace culture, but if you are working in a reasonably large organization, do you get an annual written performance evaluation? Does Mr. Scorpio write it? One thing you might do now is to take the bull by the horns (sorry, no astro-pun intended) and schedule an appointment with your supervisor. Prior to this appointment, really rehearse what you want to say and how you hope to come across.
In your best modulated, professional tone of voice, you might say something like, "Doing well in this company is really important to me. I have the feeling from things that you've said that you are concerned about my performance. If I am only imagining this, that's fine; but if you have concerns I hope you will let me know now what they are, so that we can work out a plan of improvement." Then either agree to what he says, or else think fast on your feet with a non-threatening comeback. Like, "To meet that expectation, I would need...."
If Mr. Scorpio does this, follow through with a written memorandum of what you agreed to, and specific measures by which you both can determine whether you met that template or not within a specified period of time.
This is a way that managers with a problem employee "manage down" the supervisory ladder, but I think it would work "managing up" as well, as it gives notice that you're aware of his seeming displeasure with you and are prepared to meet it in a thoroughly supportive and professional way.
https://hbr.org/2017/12/how-to-win-over-a-boss-who-just-doesnt-seem-to-like-you
http://the-happy-manager.com/articles/manage-your-boss/
Another possibility, if there are several disgruntled employees, not just you, to contemplate safety in numbers, and to speak to your supervisor's supervisor. The "Asian" comment seems utterly unprofessional. Hopefully the higher-ups have an interest in keeping their talent happy; and the workplace non-toxic. It's best not to dump a Big Problem on a higher-up boss's lap, so be prepared to come with a modest list of practical and measurable ways the situation could improve.
I can't say that any of the following will work, but these were the HR department's recommended SOP at my former place of employment-- on a good day, that is.
Perhaps your best assets will be your ability to face your boss's unwanted behaviours with a sense of humour to diffuse tense situations, and ways of letting him know how you support his career goals and portfolio in your organization.
If you think you're past that stage:
I obviously don't know much about your particular situation and workplace culture, but if you are working in a reasonably large organization, do you get an annual written performance evaluation? Does Mr. Scorpio write it? One thing you might do now is to take the bull by the horns (sorry, no astro-pun intended) and schedule an appointment with your supervisor. Prior to this appointment, really rehearse what you want to say and how you hope to come across.
In your best modulated, professional tone of voice, you might say something like, "Doing well in this company is really important to me. I have the feeling from things that you've said that you are concerned about my performance. If I am only imagining this, that's fine; but if you have concerns I hope you will let me know now what they are, so that we can work out a plan of improvement." Then either agree to what he says, or else think fast on your feet with a non-threatening comeback. Like, "To meet that expectation, I would need...."
If Mr. Scorpio does this, follow through with a written memorandum of what you agreed to, and specific measures by which you both can determine whether you met that template or not within a specified period of time.
This is a way that managers with a problem employee "manage down" the supervisory ladder, but I think it would work "managing up" as well, as it gives notice that you're aware of his seeming displeasure with you and are prepared to meet it in a thoroughly supportive and professional way.
https://hbr.org/2017/12/how-to-win-over-a-boss-who-just-doesnt-seem-to-like-you
http://the-happy-manager.com/articles/manage-your-boss/
Another possibility, if there are several disgruntled employees, not just you, to contemplate safety in numbers, and to speak to your supervisor's supervisor. The "Asian" comment seems utterly unprofessional. Hopefully the higher-ups have an interest in keeping their talent happy; and the workplace non-toxic. It's best not to dump a Big Problem on a higher-up boss's lap, so be prepared to come with a modest list of practical and measurable ways the situation could improve.
waybread
Well-known member
This is really, really unproductive thinking, AstroAssist. Speaking as someone who worked in large organizations for 31 years prior to retiring:
Your goal is not to butt heads. Your goal is not to damage anyone or "put him in his place." Your goal is not to get anyone to "cry uncle." Your goal is to get along and mutually support the goals of your organization.
Your goal-- and Mr. Scorpio's-- is to be team players.
If you have a respected mentor, Taurus or otherwise, you might share your problems with him and see what he suggests.
Your best bet, astrologically, is to see what motivates Mr. Scorpio and then look for a win-win situation. You might start with the goals or mission statement of your organization, together with the objectives of a particular project.
Otherwise you can develop a reputation as being a headstrong, emotionally immature employee who doesn't take direction well. Then, even if you decide to leave, it can be hard to get good references.
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AstroAssist
Banned
Quite frankly, I see where you are coming from but I know that this piece of human garbage is motivated by envy and cannot be swayed. With a lot of Scorpios I have known, they have this envy towards people superior to them in regards to getting female attention. My boss has even had this envy towards other men that get attention from women at our office and constantly gossips about everyone.
I admire that you are giving useful avenues but my gut tells me that we are dealing with an irrational person that cannot be reasoned with at all whatsoever. This is someone who is a power hungry maniac and in traditional Scorpio ways, just wants to get the better of other people.
My plan right now is to leave for good, there is no reasoning with such a dirty rotten scumbag.
I admire that you think someone people can be saved or reasoned with and in some situations, that is the case. I've known enough people to know that this is not someone who fits that mold, this is a snake full of hatred.
So my plan is to leave and cross my fingers that I don't get a Scorpio for a boss again to be honest. I am going to be in the same industry and if I butt heads with this snake again, I am not going to sit there and take it like I have as a worker, this rat cannot climb to the top of any ladder.
I admire that you are giving useful avenues but my gut tells me that we are dealing with an irrational person that cannot be reasoned with at all whatsoever. This is someone who is a power hungry maniac and in traditional Scorpio ways, just wants to get the better of other people.
My plan right now is to leave for good, there is no reasoning with such a dirty rotten scumbag.
I admire that you think someone people can be saved or reasoned with and in some situations, that is the case. I've known enough people to know that this is not someone who fits that mold, this is a snake full of hatred.
So my plan is to leave and cross my fingers that I don't get a Scorpio for a boss again to be honest. I am going to be in the same industry and if I butt heads with this snake again, I am not going to sit there and take it like I have as a worker, this rat cannot climb to the top of any ladder.
waybread
Well-known member
Well, what if I told you that "there is nobody else out there"? Are you familiar with Carl Jung's concepts of psychological projection and shadow material? One or both of you might be involved in this process.
And if you are, the Boss From Hell is waiting for you at your next job, until you learn to master your own inner demons.
One thing that the more intelligent, developed Scorpios learn is strategy. Frontal lobe stuff, actually.
And if you are, the Boss From Hell is waiting for you at your next job, until you learn to master your own inner demons.
One thing that the more intelligent, developed Scorpios learn is strategy. Frontal lobe stuff, actually.
Whoam1
Well-known member
So many words... the more complex creatures in life don't need more complexity to confuse the matter more. Scorpios are grudging,obsessive,fixated,stubborn, all these words have to do with inability to let things go. You my friend astro assist are currently doing the Scorpio, if you want to win, move forward.
waybread
Well-known member
We have a dear friend who is a Scorpio. She's very shy, an artist, and mostly lives alone on a beautiful acreage in the mountains. My adorable little grandson is a Scorpio.
Each sign has some good and some bad associated with it. I think each of us would hate it if only the bad things about us defined us in the eyes of other people.
Each sign has some good and some bad associated with it. I think each of us would hate it if only the bad things about us defined us in the eyes of other people.
AstroAssist
Banned
Ya, cold and calculating is the sign's middle name.
I am still looking into what placements and signs tend to get the better of Scorpios on the regular given the sign's tendency to hold grudges, bully others, make lives miserable for people they envy, and latch on like parasites.
If the world created such an evil sign, I am certain it created ways to deal with it and get the better of it.
Therese
Well-known member
hi AstroAssist,
If I read and analyzed this thread as a script for a play or a film, it would be something like this:
The lead character starts by describing a difficult work situation, evoking empathy from the others. In that initial post, to test the waters without interfering with that empathy pouring in, he says
When he has elicited enough response that assure him of their emotional support, he uses that to boost his perceived status in the group by saying
The main character fixates on his boss' envy of him without ever going into details about how He himself behaves at the workplace. He does have a marginal comment
but he does not make an attempt to give this any further thought and/or contemplate his colleagues' reasons (I suppose they are just envious of him, too, and/or they also have something in Scorpio).
To be on the safe side and not to antagonize too many readers until he feels supported enough, the main character says
Then he has a few responses reminding him that people with Scorpio placements are fellow human beings, not one-sided papier-mâché figures printed "NASTY" on them. Someone even takes the effort to give him advice on how to sort out his workplace situation in a constructive way, because they happen to have plenty of personal experience about this kind of environment. That irritates the lead character, doesn't it? Does he feel they are stealing his show? He is quick to dismiss their help with a condescending
Then, when there are others who suggest that the main character reflects on himself in this situation, he leashes out on Scorpios again instead, and fixates on revenge and gaining power over all people with this placement. He seems to believe Scorpios have some kind of superpower, so what is he going to achieve if he beats them all? Total control over everyone?
My guess is that the writer of this script is quite familiar with the DSM 5 criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder...
If I read and analyzed this thread as a script for a play or a film, it would be something like this:
The lead character starts by describing a difficult work situation, evoking empathy from the others. In that initial post, to test the waters without interfering with that empathy pouring in, he says
When he has elicited enough response that assure him of their emotional support, he uses that to boost his perceived status in the group by saying
The main character fixates on his boss' envy of him without ever going into details about how He himself behaves at the workplace. He does have a marginal comment
but he does not make an attempt to give this any further thought and/or contemplate his colleagues' reasons (I suppose they are just envious of him, too, and/or they also have something in Scorpio).
To be on the safe side and not to antagonize too many readers until he feels supported enough, the main character says
Then he has a few responses reminding him that people with Scorpio placements are fellow human beings, not one-sided papier-mâché figures printed "NASTY" on them. Someone even takes the effort to give him advice on how to sort out his workplace situation in a constructive way, because they happen to have plenty of personal experience about this kind of environment. That irritates the lead character, doesn't it? Does he feel they are stealing his show? He is quick to dismiss their help with a condescending
Then, when there are others who suggest that the main character reflects on himself in this situation, he leashes out on Scorpios again instead, and fixates on revenge and gaining power over all people with this placement. He seems to believe Scorpios have some kind of superpower, so what is he going to achieve if he beats them all? Total control over everyone?
My guess is that the writer of this script is quite familiar with the DSM 5 criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder...
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Therese
Well-known member
This is not about Scorpio. Everybody has Scorpio energy in their chart somewhere, whether it's planets, angles, midpoints or important aspects involving Mars (traditional ruler) or Pluto (modern ruler), etc.
The twelve signs together used to be called the Great Man. That's the basis of the correspondence between the signs and parts of the body, as well. Aries is the head. Every one of us has a head, every one of us has Aries somewhere. And so on.
The question is not whether we have the energy of this or that sign or planet in our chart, and/or how heavily represented this or that is. The question is what we do with it. All signs and planets can manifest on a spectrum, from "constructive" to "destructive", from "deep" to "superficial", and so on.
In a natal chart, everything is connected to everything else, we cannot tell anything about a native by focusing on certain features of their natal chart and disregarding others. If talking of Mary, John will only tell us that she is a neat freak, and Sandra will only say that she's shy, will we know that Mary is also a brilliant brain surgeon?
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waybread
Well-known member
Interesting analysis, Therese.
I just came across this bit of psychology theory on another thread:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karpman_drama_triangle
We might also consider whether a comparatively young employee, new to a company and unused to the troublesome characters prominent in most organizations, isn't narcissistic so much as grappling with culture shock.
I just came across this bit of psychology theory on another thread:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karpman_drama_triangle
We might also consider whether a comparatively young employee, new to a company and unused to the troublesome characters prominent in most organizations, isn't narcissistic so much as grappling with culture shock.
Therese
Well-known member
There are many interesting theories that simplify human behaviour by creating a few sets everybody should be fit into, and they are all very popular because we love putting each other into boxes.
Don't worry, I have no intention of victimizing the op, no need to come to his rescue.
What I am doing is the same as what others did in this thread, in their own way. Gentle invitations for self-reflection did not help. So I was trying to show him that he might be riding a horse of a different colour than he thinks. His current behaviour shows that he is walking down a path that leads somewhere I am not sure he wants to be going. I am not calling him a narcissist, I am saying he is currently exhibiting some narcissistic traits and it's a good time to check whether his current behaviour reflects who he is or who he wants to be.
There's quite a few of us who had the culture shock of starting our career in a very different and quite hostile environment, and you probably agree that the op's approach is not helping him.
I don't know him and I don't know anything about him except his discourse here. And right now that discourse looks very much like hate speech. How long can such an intense negative mental state be contained without erupting? Maybe it is a good time to pause and reflect.
[oi, I’m a Scorpio. Lay off. The real bad guys are Leo’s.
QUOTE=AstroAssist;855420]Ya, cold and calculating is the sign's middle name.
I am still looking into what placements and signs tend to get the better of Scorpios on the regular given the sign's tendency to hold grudges, bully others, make lives miserable for people they envy, and latch on like parasites.
If the world created such an evil sign, I am certain it created ways to deal with it and get the better of it.[/QUOTE]
QUOTE=AstroAssist;855420]Ya, cold and calculating is the sign's middle name.
I am still looking into what placements and signs tend to get the better of Scorpios on the regular given the sign's tendency to hold grudges, bully others, make lives miserable for people they envy, and latch on like parasites.
If the world created such an evil sign, I am certain it created ways to deal with it and get the better of it.[/QUOTE]
AstroAssist
Banned
Unlike Scorpios, Leos can't really do any damage and are softies at heart 
As I look more into dealing with the nastier Scorpios out there, what I have found is that the nasty people of this sign have power because others tend to be forgiving. People think that they have changed or are over it when in truth, they are just waiting for the opportunity to take their revenge. So the reason Scorpios have so much power or are considered the grandmaster of the zodiac who cannot possibly be defeated is because people either underestimate them or either forgive them.
So this is kind of like playing possum, Scorpios do this because other signs tend not to hold a grudge or just move on.
What I think may work when strategizing against Scorpio placements is well, being Scorpio-like towards that very placement. Don't forgive, don't forget, and always know who you're dealing with.
As I look more into dealing with the nastier Scorpios out there, what I have found is that the nasty people of this sign have power because others tend to be forgiving. People think that they have changed or are over it when in truth, they are just waiting for the opportunity to take their revenge. So the reason Scorpios have so much power or are considered the grandmaster of the zodiac who cannot possibly be defeated is because people either underestimate them or either forgive them.
So this is kind of like playing possum, Scorpios do this because other signs tend not to hold a grudge or just move on.
What I think may work when strategizing against Scorpio placements is well, being Scorpio-like towards that very placement. Don't forgive, don't forget, and always know who you're dealing with.
waybread
Well-known member
AstroAssist, let me just suggest that you have so much more to learn about astrology, human nature, and interpersonal relationships. This type of post, unfortunately, makes you look uninformed and prejudiced.
One of my Dad's pithy sayings was, "Don't confuse me with the facts. My mind is made up."
waybread
Well-known member
Unlike Scorpios, Leos can't really do any damage and are softies at heart
As I look more into dealing with the nastier Scorpios out there, what I have found is that the nasty people of this sign have power because others tend to be forgiving. People think that they have changed or are over it when in truth, they are just waiting for the opportunity to take their revenge. So the reason Scorpios have so much power or are considered the grandmaster of the zodiac who cannot possibly be defeated is because people either underestimate them or either forgive them.
So this is kind of like playing possum, Scorpios do this because other signs tend not to hold a grudge or just move on.
What I think may work when strategizing against Scorpio placements is well, being Scorpio-like towards that very placement. Don't forgive, don't forget, and always know who you're dealing with.
Possibly you've missed your calling as a fiction-writer. This is the stuff of fantasy novels, not real life.
AA, there is age maturity and emotional maturity. Time to focus on wisdom, not on how to out-Scorpio a make-believe, fantasized Scorpio. I think you're getting obsessive about this. Plutonian, that's what it is: Plutonian.
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