Hi all. My husband often criticizes me ranging from my weight (not overweight but i do have a few extra pounds though I am tall so I'm not seen as overweight), he seems to be aggressive in his personality which I don't like and overall, i don't often feel comfy being around him because he flips out quickly and has anger issues plus he's more of 'i don't give a f...' type of person about everything and I'm not like that so that part of him also bothers me. I feel like we are not that compatible and i need peace around me because he gets upset over eating out too if the food isn't up to his standards (he likes to eat at home), he gets easily irritated and doesn't have an issue running my enjoyment of my dinner. I already kicked him out for a different reason once but he crawled right back. He doesn't want to go and says so but i feel like my peace as well as a relaxed atmosphere in my house is what i need. We also get into petty bickering often which gets on my nerves. I wanted to know if I should leave him for good cause i told him to leave once he finds a room and he said he will but i feel like he doesn't want to go and says so but he doesn't even change so.....i don't want to be around someone who constantly criticises me as i don't want to feel like I'm feeling down because of someone else often. It's like I'm always doing things not right so that feeling gets tiring. When I kicked him out for a different reason, part of me felt relaxed and at ease but definitely disappointed that i can't seem to make relationships work especially marriage and i got disappointed with myself that marriage isn't fit for me as i keep meeting wrong men. I also don't feel confident when someone is being aggressive around me so the fact that he flips off makes me not feel comfortable in my own skin. I don't like the 'tense' feeling even when there's no reason for me to feel that way. For example, i often try not to say something that i don't like seeing just for the fact not to get him upset yet he doesn't have an issue expressing his own feeling as I don't slip myself trying to keep peace. I try to ease things when he gets upset and when i get upset i keep it inside me not to argue so that one sided attempt on my end is also bothering me as i bottle up inside me these tense and negative feelings that i do not express. I am 38 now and he is 44 and doesn't even want a kid (doesn't have any yet) while i do and he keeps saying that when he gets a truck is when h will start earning well and will think about it but that he isn't into changing diapers and he will be in and out and not be around the kids too much as he doesn't want the responsibility of a baby problems. Since I want a child and I know that my parents will help out, i feel like why even bother having it with him when I can do it on my own and enjoy it having the necessary help around and let him be without a kid which one day he will regret for sure. Since he keeps talking negatively of me, I feel like why even stay with me as I'm the only one who keeps wanting out of this marriage and i told him if I'm so bad then why ar you keep staying? Makes no sense. Also, I'm tired of being the scapegoat. He makes me feel like I'm no good and the only positive thing he says is that I'm a good person yet he might turn around in a few minutes and say that i can ***** him up at any minute as I'm that type of person LOL so even in such situation it's not clear whether I'm a good person as he says or not )))
at this point i feel like marriage is so hard, perhaps relationships in general. regarding the chart, i see that moon, my emotions are in detriment which is obvious and that I'm flowing away from him as venus, me, is faster moving planet.
at this point i feel like marriage is so hard, perhaps relationships in general. regarding the chart, i see that moon, my emotions are in detriment which is obvious and that I'm flowing away from him as venus, me, is faster moving planet.