Hi Venus in Libra. Its possible that the people about whom you have talked also carry the same 'Venus in air aspecting Saturn and Neptune' kind of energy that you have. When Saturn and Neptune both aspect a personal planet, then that planet is torn between the need for stability, predictability and formality of Saturn, and the wistful idealism and yearning for paradise of Neptune.
Venus Saturn aspects suggest inhibition of self-love, and often a need for secure relationships as a way of avoiding fully experiencing an underlying sense of lack of self-worth. Or they may choose isolation and self-sufficiency as a safer bet. Venus-Neptune often thirsts for the love that will redeem all of one's pain and isolation, but because no relationship can ever fully do that, disillusionment sets in sooner or later and then one is left alone outside the gates of paradise again.
If the people you have encountered have similar aspects in their charts, then they may initially see you as the one who can save them from their loneliness and set about formalising the arrangement in order to stabilise it. But once it becomes apparent to them that they are in a real life situation requiring commitment and effort, then the Neptunian bubble bursts and they start to feel the painful feelings again. And Aquarius doesn't want to be within miles of painful feelings, generally.
But I guess what's important is your dynamic and what this all means for your growth. My guess is that if you can explore the fears and hopes around Venus issues (your sense of your own femininity, your view of what makes life beautiful and worthwhile, your sense of self-worth and resourcefulness, your relationship needs, etc) then you will be less likely to experience similar roller-coaster relationships in the future.
I hope this helpful. Feedback always welcome, and I'm happy to post more if it feels useful to you.
Hi Miquar, thank you for answering.
Actually, my Venus in Libra receives one aspect only, though its a very powerful and not so good one: it squares my moon conjunct asc. in Cancer. It explains why I feel atracted for men that dont fulfill my need for safety or intimacy. My venus and my moon, they have a lot discordant opinions about what is good for me!
Half of the boyfriends I had were venus in aquarius types. Besides the reasons I mentioned - their venus falling in my 7th, trine my venus and so on - there´s also the fact that my sun is conjunct uranus, which gives me a certain "aquarian color" that seems to be atractive to them at first.
And when it comes to dating a man that suits my moon, there´s no excitement at all. They fail in pleasing my venus... I must admit I consider them to be too passive, even feminine to my taste, which is unfair, but who said life is fair game?
However, the last "venus in aquarius" had a few more indications in his birth map pointing to a person that does not easily fit in any lasting, close relationship. He has moon and sun in sagitarius, his moon square pluto and uranus in conjunction. Venus and mars are almost in conjunction in his 3th - sex for him is a lot about talking, and also he has neptune conjunct asc. in scorpio, both in exact trine to my moon and asc. in cancer.
So, I think the whole afair was meant to be about dreaming and telling, and nothing more. We met online, "dated" for almost 18 months, and when I started to feel uneasy about his always postponed promises of a real encounter - we live in opposite hemispheres - he became rude and cold and we came to an end.
They say Venus in Aquarius always look at their lovers as friends, but the way he behave to me was not friendly at all, and this is something I had experienced before with my former venus in aquarius boyfriends. They always bring the end in the most cold and unconsiderate manner, without any care for my feelings or needs, and disapear at once. I must add most of them tried to aproach me again years later, and we keep some kind of friendly relationship, since I try not to show how badly I was hurt.
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Also my chart is mostly air, so I can be detached myself and it doesn't bother me that much when it comes to others.