Should i aim to have light/loose/superficial friendships instead of deep?

I cant help but notice that when it comes to my friendships with women they don't really go anywhere, but as soon as I find one I like and want it to get deeper, it always backfires, and ends. I feel uncomfortable with having light friendships but im thinking perhaps that's what im destined for? I read somewhere that 8th cusp Gemini means that it would do the person well to talk less. Family, my husband and children and mother are the most important ppl in my life and they are all my best friends. No other person equates to them. So im wondering, should I just give up on friendships? I mean im so changeable in my life and im usually the odd one out too. It's rare for me to share my life for a long time with another friend. And if I looked back at ones I really liked, we were separated by change of residency or school.

If I look at the chart, my husband and myself, and my twins are in 11th of friends. My son is Jupiter in 1st, always with me. My mother is in 12th however, so im not sure how that shows she's my best friend. But 11th ruler is mercury and receive Jupiter (son). Maybe ill meet more meaningful friendships through my son. My son's 5th ruler is also in my 1st house. Hmm, I guess ill only keep friends if I follow my hobbies and parties. Hmmm yes that does make sense. My closest friends were from my dance school as a kid. But not much evolved elsewhere. Im just so focused on my goals that I don't put energy to 5th house activities (other than parenthood).

Is your oldest in school yet? I made a lot of friends when my kids were in elementary. I became closer to other Mom's that my kids played with at school and after school. We would have tea and chat while the kids all played together. Then as the kids were older, we all 'grew' together over the years.

With Pisces on the 5th, maybe you don't always see your friendships very clearly? You might have unrealistic expectations concerning the depth of the friendships?

katydid said:

Is your oldest in school yet? I made a lot of friends when my kids were in elementary. I became closer to other Mom's that my kids played with at school and after school. We would have tea and chat while the kids all played together. Then as the kids were older, we all 'grew' together over the years.

With Pisces on the 5th, maybe you don't always see your friendships very clearly? You might have unrealistic expectations concerning the depth of the friendships?

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Hi Katydid .

My son starts kindy this yr. I met a woman on orientation day who seemed nice and I hope we can get closer. Her son sounds a lot like mine. The rest of the group there didn't look like my kind of ppl. My kids have been with me to playgroup but the women there did not want to talk at all and just kept to themselves which I thought was quite rude.
We got along well with the neighbours at first but then the 5 children started telling me I had to believe in Allah (or some kind of Arabic god) etc and the relationship ended pretty quick. It was a cultural thing. There always seems to be something.

When u say 5th, don't you mean 11th cos 11th rules friends? So perhaps im critical with friends but I cant help it.

I have a very good penpal from the other side of the world and she has lovely virgo qualities that I admire, and I wish I could have someone like that here in person.

Abby83 said:

Hi Katydid .

My son starts kindy this yr. I met a woman on orientation day who seemed nice and I hope we can get closer. Her son sounds a lot like mine. The rest of the group there didn't look like my kind of ppl. My kids have been with me to playgroup but the women there did not want to talk at all and just kept to themselves which I thought was quite rude.
We got along well with the neighbours at first but then the 5 children started telling me I had to believe in Allah (or some kind of Arabic god) etc and the relationship ended pretty quick. It was a cultural thing. There always seems to be something.

When u say 5th, don't you mean 11th cos 11th rules friends? So perhaps im critical with friends but I cant help it.

I have a very good penpal from the other side of the world and she has lovely virgo qualities that I admire, and I wish I could have someone like that here in person.

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Yes, I should have clarified. The 11th rules 'friends' and our circle of social contacts. But the 5th rules 'how we express our love' towards our family and friends. It is 'love given to others.'

So with Pisces on the 5th, perhaps you don't have the same boundaries as some do. You may have deep emotional bonds and great expectations of others feeling levels that are greater than the average bears?

katydid said:

Yes, I should have clarified. The 11th rules 'friends' and our circle of social contacts. But the 5th rules 'how we express our love' towards our family and friends. It is 'love given to others.'

So with Pisces on the 5th, perhaps you don't have the same boundaries as some do. You may have deep emotional bonds and great expectations of others feeling levels that are greater than the average bears?

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Yes this is very true. I want deep emotional bonds and I find my love for others bears a sacrificial side to the relationship. I'm always having to give something up to maintain the friendship and that really irritates me. Like I keep thinking about a few friends I had in the past. They always invited me out to their parties but when it was my birthday none of them ever came. Wtf is up with that. But when it comes to my hobbies, yeah that's where I meet them, but that's where it stays.

So when it comes to this lack of boundaries which happens to be highlighted in my progressed chart right now, is there anything I can do in the future to prevent this or to improve my social life? I'm thinking what u said about meeting friends though kids is good. That way we are united for a better cause. We see one couple who have kids and already it feels too one sided with them having 5 parties in 4 months we have to get presents for.

Thanks for your tips. Xxooxxoo.

the 11th house is our group associations where we have a common goal or
interest. It rules societies, clubs, unions, fraternities etc. It rules movements,
third world and humanitarian interests as well as sciences and technologies that are for the betterment of humanity. As it rules the media of radio and television aviation and astrology then travel groups where we fly together would be here, for instance.
Those that we take to the streets for protests, wanting to upset the status quo and the establishment belong here.

Our peers, friends, neighbours, we see on a regular basis or in touch with just about everyday, are of the 3rd house.

Claire19 said:

the 11th house is our group associations where we have a common goal or
interest. It rules societies, clubs, unions, fraternities etc. It rules movements,
third world and humanitarian interests as well as sciences and technologies that are for the betterment of humanity. As it rules the media of radio and television aviation and astrology then travel groups where we fly together would be here, for instance.
Those that we take to the streets for protests, wanting to upset the status quo and the establishment belong here.

Our peers, friends, neighbours, we see on a regular basis or in touch with just about everyday, are of the 3rd house.

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I appreciate your response Claire, however I do believe 11th rules friends because transiting positive aspects to my 11th ruler has brought me harmony with lots of friends and fun, yet difficult aspects to that planet give me hell.