A steamy, dreamy synastry with married man?

J

justice

Member
Hi,

First and foremost, I am not interested in comments that attempt to subvert my personal life into a moral battlefield--please. I.E: I don't want to hear "cheating is bad", "you're a horrible person" etc and any other (potentially offensive/combative/presumptuous) value judgments of the like. I know this. I have hesitated to post this a million times for this reason. However, we do not know each other here, and so; our spiritual journeys are distinct and worthy of respect.

That being said, there is an earth-shattering, magnetic pull that I feel whenever this man is around me. By the grace of the Divine Force, my composure has not betrayed me and I have managed to act rationally and respectfully, despite my otherwise insatiable "hunger", so to speak, for this man. I think he feels it too and reciprocates energetically (intense gazes/subtle psychic cues) but does an impeccable job of controlling his impulses--which in turn only intensifies my attraction for him, as I find myself woefully impressed with his unwavering displays of dignity and self-respect. We are both heavily Plutonic and Saturnine. This is obviously taking a toll on me psychically and I am trying to discern why such a powerful--seemingly fated--attraction hinges on a classically "taboo" moral quandary.

Any insights on what this might be doing to him (on his end)? What is the "lesson" here? I need a detached perspective, as I am obviously wound-up and mired in the intensity of my own emotions regarding this matter that I feel I am somewhat at a disadvantage in attempting to analyze this.

I extend my thanks, in advance, for offering your time and effort, in whatever capacity. I am happy to provide some context, if needed.

He is Capricorn and I am Pisces (female).

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unique_astrology

unique_astrology

Well-known member
I cannot say what he is feeling towards you at this time but things change as transits and progressions move on. It is your progressions, not his, that are showing your feelings of late.

Attraction is building as your progressed Venus is squaring his natal Sun and your progressed Sun trines his natal Venus. These are building on his natal Moon conjunct your natal Sun. But that Moon is also on your natal Mercury and Saturn.

In your synastry his Mars-Saturn opposition (an aspect that quite often plays out in bullying behavior) is on your natal MC-IC axis. A reminder - the progressed aspects will pass, the natal ones will not, and they will be triggered over and over by transits and progressions.
 

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J

justice

Member
unique_astrology said:
I cannot say what he is feeling towards you at this time but things change as transits and progressions move on. It is your progressions, not his, that are showing your feelings of late.

Attraction is building as your progressed Venus is squaring his natal Sun and your progressed Sun trines his natal Venus. These are building on his natal Moon conjunct your natal Sun. But that Moon is also on your natal Mercury and Saturn.

In your synastry his Mars-Saturn opposition (an aspect that quite often plays out in bullying behavior) is on your natal MC-IC axis. A reminder - the progressed aspects will pass, the natal ones will not, and they will be triggered over and over by transits and progressions.
Click to expand...

Thank you, unique_astrology, for your thoughtful response. I hope I am understanding you correctly, you seem to be suggesting that present feelings are reflected in progressions. With the natal synastry being a permanent thing, will this attraction be omnipresent then, with highs and lows in intensity depending on transits and progressions? What is the main takeaway from the natal synastry itself? I am having trouble grasping what the purpose of this is/might be. Is it one-sided?

With respect to your comment on Mars-Saturn being potentially a bullying aspect, does his being twice my age mitigate this, in the sense that his "matured" sense of orderliness and disciplined action influence my own maturation process from (Saturn on) IC into the (Mars on) MC?
 
unique_astrology

unique_astrology

Well-known member
You have it correct as to your progressions stimulating his Sun and Venus and the ebb and flow being affected by changing transits and progressions. The takeaway will be what you decide it to be.
As to how he manifests his Mars-Saturn opposition I believe what Edgar Cayce said about astrological influences, and thinking you must observe a person for some length of time to gain a fairly accurate assessment of their likely behavior in various situations.

It is good to remember what he said about astrological influences.

http://ecayce.tripod.com/astro.htm

"This psychic reading given by Edgar Cayce at the Phillips Hotel, Dayton, Ohio, this 24th day of November, 1923, at 3:30pm in accordance with request made by [5717], [953], [294], and others.

PRESENT: Edgar Cayce; Linden Shroyer, Conductor, Gladys Davis, Steno.

(Question) Please give a definition of the word astrology."

"...BUT LET IT BE UNDERSTOOD HERE, NO ACTION OF ANY PLANET OR THE PHASES OF THE SUN, THE MOON OR ANY OF THE HEAVENLY BODIES SURPASS THE RULE OF MAN'S WILL POWER, ... "

The entry was done in caps just as I copied it. A search using that quote will yield many sources.

Are you both residing in your place of birth now?
 
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J

justice

Member
unique_astrology said:
You have it correct as to your progressions stimulating his Sun and Venus and the ebb and flow being affected by changing transits and progressions. The takeaway will be what you decide it to be.
As to how he manifests his Mars-Saturn opposition I believe what Edgar Cayce said about astrological influences, and thinking you must observe a person for some length of time to gain a fairly accurate assessment of their likely behavior in various situations.

It is good to remember what he said about astrological influences.

http://ecayce.tripod.com/astro.htm

This psychic reading given by Edgar Cayce at the Phillips Hotel, Dayton, Ohio, this 24th day of November, 1923, at 3:30pm in accordance with request made by [5717], [953], [294], and others.

PRESENT: Edgar Cayce; Linden Shroyer, Conductor, Gladys Davis, Steno.

(Question) Please give a definition of the word astrology.

"...BUT LET IT BE UNDERSTOOD HERE, NO ACTION OF ANY PLANET OR THE PHASES OF THE SUN, THE MOON OR ANY OF THE HEAVENLY BODIES SURPASS THE RULE OF MAN'S WILL POWER, ... "

The entry was done in caps just as I copied it. A search using that quote will yield many sources.

Are you both residing in your place of birth now?
Click to expand...

I hear what you are saying about it being whatever I decide for it to be. I have made no definitive decisions (neither has he). We speak but for brief moments, anyway and it is sporadic. Those brief moments however are imbued with powerful energy, intensity, and ease of rapport/relating (jokes, interesting conversations, etc.) that is waiting to explode (at least that is how it feels to me) which is why I think a sincere friendship is not possible and the other alternative (affair) does not sit well with me. I can feel the Venus-Pluto-Jupiter-Node conjunction very deeply and certainly the nodal pull is no myth.

Also, no, we are living in a major east coast city distinct of our place of birth(s). What do you think of his pMars opposite my nMoon?
 
Sweet Pea

Sweet Pea

Well-known member
You have Sun conjunct Saturn, reflecting his Capricorn Sun so he's a natural "match" for your solar self. You in turn are a match for his Pisces Moon. As you'll have noticed, there are lots of powerful connections, like your Sun on his Moon, your Jupiter on his Mars, your Mars square his Mars, your Pluto to his Venus-Jupiter and square to his Moon. I can totally understand the attraction. The likelihood is, he feels it too.

His Scorpio placements make him extremely magnetic and especially when they're triggered by synastry. Everyone of your age with Pluto in the same position is going to be triggered by his Venus-Jupiter and find him sexy and he's probably already had "the look" from other girls your age, and is perhaps rather used to it. No doubt he likes that feeling of power. And of course Scorpio is the sign of taboos, forbidden fruits, underhand dealings and desires. It can also turn bad, with power plays, manipulations, hooking and luring almost vampiristically, revenge attacks when thwarted, etc, so beware...

At the moment, transiting Jupiter is on your Jupiter ("Jupiter return", it's called) and emphasizing this scorpionic part of you. This attraction seems to coincide with that transit which is what happens - something comes into our lives to make us aware of that part of our psyche, to experience it in an enhanced kind of way. Of course it will be hitting his Mars shortly too, but your Jupiter is getting the first hit as transiting Jupiter moves forward.

I wouldn't actually call it fated - I'd call it simply what the Universe does when it makes our lives mirror in some way the transits or progressions that we're going through. At the same time, transiting Neptune at 16 Pisces is hitting your Jupiter and his Mars, bringing a sense of dreaminess and 'what ifs', which is actually exactly what your Pisces placements may be prone to do anyway.

And yet, going back to Saturn being conjunct your Pisces Sun - if you want to know how that natal lesson looks to me, it looks to be about reining in your emotional, fantasizing, impractical, make-believe, responses, based on what a typical Pisces Sun, Mercury and Venus would do. It looks like honourableness and responsibility and behaving respectably and impeccably - just as you appear to be doing in response to the intense provocation of his body and his 'looks' sending your hormones into freefall. I'd say if there is a lesson, or a test, going on, you're passing it with flying colours.

You're probably only too aware of Saturn's nature: he comes down harshly on us with the voice of the inner critic when we're not behaving. He's the voice of reason and often the voice of fear, thinking through the practical result of any action before we do it. It's likely to be the same for him - Capricorns are highly aware of their 'standing' and of the potential consequences of misbehaving - long term repercussions if he has a wife and children too. If anyone stops to think hard before going down the road of an affair/fling/one night stand, it's this sign.

You may find that the attraction intensifies, but then appears to wear off as Jupiter (currently at 13 Scorpio) conjuncts your Jupiter exactly, but then moves on. Though of course it will square your Mars after it's passed over his Mars..... this could stretch on a bit.
 
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S

Sagcap88

Well-known member
You sound really drained and like you’ve worn your brain out trying to make sense of the situation and analyze him/figure him out.

While you have a few nice aspects, I think that what really stands out is his sun in your twelfth house; that one can REALLY mess you up. You’ll spend hours thinking and it and...never reach a thought that satisfies you. The twelfth house isn’t good in synastry — it feels dreamy (like an opium den) but it ends up being miserable. It’s the house of undoing, after all.

I wouldn’t be surprised at a psychic link with that sun placement alone but it really won’t bring happiness. You sound tired and frustrated. I’ve seen that with other people with prominent 12th house in synastry. :(

I know you asked what this is doing to him and it looks like he obviously likes you but what I see more of is what it’s doing to you. I think he has the upper hand.

Edit: I also don’t see enough Jupiter, which really shows whether you’re happy with this person.

This relationship seems to be playing on your emotions.
 
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J

justice

Member
Sweet Pea said:
You have Sun conjunct Saturn, reflecting his Capricorn Sun so he's a natural "match" for your solar self. You in turn are a match for his Pisces Moon. As you'll have noticed, there are lots of powerful connections, like your Sun on his Moon, your Jupiter on his Mars, your Mars square his Mars, your Pluto to his Venus-Jupiter and square to his Moon. I can totally understand the attraction. The likelihood is, he feels it too.

His Scorpio placements make him extremely magnetic and especially when they're triggered by synastry. Everyone of your age with Pluto in the same position is going to be triggered by his Venus-Jupiter and find him sexy and he's probably already had "the look" from other girls your age, and is perhaps rather used to it. No doubt he likes that feeling of power. And of course Scorpio is the sign of taboos, forbidden fruits, underhand dealings and desires. It can also turn bad, with power plays, manipulations, hooking and luring almost vampiristically, revenge attacks when thwarted, etc, so beware...

At the moment, transiting Jupiter is on your Jupiter ("Jupiter return", it's called) and emphasizing this scorpionic part of you. This attraction seems to coincide with that transit which is what happens - something comes into our lives to make us aware of that part of our psyche, to experience it in an enhanced kind of way. Of course it will be hitting his Mars shortly too, but your Jupiter is getting the first hit as transiting Jupiter moves forward.

I wouldn't actually call it fated - I'd call it simply what the Universe does when it makes our lives mirror in some way the transits or progressions that we're going through. At the same time, transiting Neptune at 16 Pisces is hitting your Jupiter and his Mars, bringing a sense of dreaminess and 'what ifs', which is actually exactly what your Pisces placements may be prone to do anyway.

And yet, going back to Saturn being conjunct your Pisces Sun - if you want to know how that natal lesson looks to me, it looks to be about reining in your emotional, fantasizing, impractical, make-believe, responses, based on what a typical Pisces Sun, Mercury and Venus would do. It looks like honourableness and responsibility and behaving respectably and impeccably - just as you appear to be doing in response to the intense provocation of his body and his 'looks' sending your hormones into freefall. I'd say if there is a lesson, or a test, going on, you're passing it with flying colours.

You're probably only too aware of Saturn's nature: he comes down harshly on us with the voice of the inner critic when we're not behaving. He's the voice of reason and often the voice of fear, thinking through the practical result of any action before we do it. It's likely to be the same for him - Capricorns are highly aware of their 'standing' and of the potential consequences of misbehaving - long term repercussions if he has a wife and children too. If anyone stops to think hard before going down the road of an affair/fling/one night stand, it's this sign.

You may find that the attraction intensifies, but then appears to wear off as Jupiter (currently at 13 Scorpio) conjuncts your Jupiter exactly, but then moves on. Though of course it will square your Mars after it's passed over his Mars..... this could stretch on a bit.
Click to expand...

Hi Sweet Pea!

Thank you for your thorough response. Aware of Saturn I am! Fun (or drama) never comes my way, unless it is entangled in a Plutonic predicament (Pluto squares my Saturn conjunctions) so I am perpetually in a state of self-restraint against all things and people that trigger my Plutonic side.

This dance has been going on for a while (over a year). He knows I have a "crush" on him (because someone told him) and with that out there, the airiness in me will see to it that my end of the banter is tinged with witty giveaways. He is shy and chuckles often at my ramblings--it is painfully obvious to him that I am "smitten" and he, in his subtle ways, let's me know that he knows without being pretentious about it... Aside from the compelling attraction, there is a genuine best-bud kind of vibe to our conversations (my Moon-Mars trine his Uranus). I feel very comfortable being humorous which is very unusual for me and he is very receptive to it which I like. I think this is where the resonance between our Suns-Mercuries and his Moon comes to play. There could be more to this, emotional intimacy etc., but that is uncharted territory.

Your observations about Jupiter are interesting... Would Jupiter moving away make a big difference in terms of feeling the attraction? From March to late June, I managed to reset and get him out of my mind but seeing him recently has become a vicious trigger which was set ablaze by the realization that I've only two weeks before I move to another country for a year.

Now, I feel this sudden sense of urgency to figure "this" out, like time is escaping me and I must get to the bottom of this while I can. This has been building over the past week. I am always giving way to Saturn and repressing Pluto--which is the right thing to do in this case but I am not sure why this entails "rejecting" a nodal experience. Is there anything that his Venus-Jupiter conjunction could teach my Node-Pluto conjunction without this turning into an affair? I just feel there is something I am "missing" from him--even pertaining to starting grad school in the fall and career in general, which he has taken an active interest in (from application to acceptance to preparing for my move).

This coming lunar eclipse on the 27th--Sun-Moon opposition in 4 degrees Leo and Aqua respectively--tMars in 4 Aquarius, and tNodes in 5 Leo and Aquarius is on 1) our Composite Sun in 5 Aqua 2) my ascendant in 4 Aqua 3) his Sun-Moon midpoint in 5 Aqua. Any insights on what this could mean/signal?

Also, I laughed really hard at "his looks sending your hormones into freefall". You're hilarious! Yes, he sure is a melting pot of Scorpio/Pluto. I do wonder if he's had this effect on women my age, he seems very low-key and does not overstate his sexiness in anyway...
 
J

justice

Member
Sagcap88 said:
You sound really drained and like you’ve worn your brain out trying to make sense of the situation and analyze him/figure him out.

While you have a few nice aspects, I think that what really stands out is his sun in your twelfth house; that one can REALLY mess you up. You’ll spend hours thinking and it and...never reach a thought that satisfies you. The twelfth house isn’t good in synastry — it feels dreamy (like an opium den) but it ends up being miserable. It’s the house of undoing, after all.

I wouldn’t be surprised at a psychic link with that sun placement alone but it really won’t bring happiness. You sound tired and frustrated. I’ve seen that with other people with prominent 12th house in synastry. :(

I know you asked what this is doing to him and it looks like he obviously likes you but what I see more of is what it’s doing to you. I think he has the upper hand.

Edit: I also don’t see enough Jupiter, which really shows whether you’re happy with this person.

This relationship seems to be playing on your emotions.
Click to expand...

Hi Sagcap88, thank you for your insights. You are right that it is playing on my emotions--I've never been in a situation so befuddling. I am not very worried about 12th house synastry because I am Pisces heavy and my chart-ruler is in the 12th conjunct Neptune. I have always found myself romantically involved with Capricorn or men with personal planets in Capricorn. Every lesson learned about love or about myself through love came from a Capricorn. Something about them completely allows me to be myself... I'm also not very Jupiterian, but his Jupiter squares my Pisces stellium, conjunct my Node-Pluto, and mine opposes his Saturn, conjuncts his Mars and sextiles his Sun.

His existence is very symbolic to me because upon interacting with him, I see how very kind, caring, traditional, respectful, and quiet he is. Not showy or egoistic. Not pompous or hypermasculine. Humble and down to earth. He is hard-working and has a lovely calm energy with a burning intensity that simmers beneath. He strikes me as the kind of man I would want for a husband. Someone who so coolly and gently navigates the world but would turn the heat up in private. He just has everything I like in a man. I even wrote up a hypothetical chart for my "ideal partner" years ago: a Capricorn man, with a Pisces moon, Capricorn Mercury, Scorpio Mars and Aquarius Venus, and an earth/water ASC. He comes very close, maybe even better... I've never seen/had a synastry before with anyone where every single planet of ours is aspected in more ways than one and with every aspect available, including minor aspects. I can even feel intuitively how a relationship with him might have been if reality wasn't what it was.

I think I project my unhappiness and discomfort with my own youth onto him, in a way. A part of me wishes to fast forward 20 years when I am established within my career, self-fulfilled and settled with a man who is just like him. Men my age do not appeal to me at all and I do not appeal to them either.

I feel he has the upper hand because he's twice my age, has other lives he is providing for and nurturing, and definitely has far more at stake if he makes an inappropriate move. I am just a young girl in her early 20s with hardly any responsibilities (relative to his) and enough mental space to daydream about this mysterious, older man who happens to possess all the qualities I seek in a future husband. He has such a calming yet electrifying effect on me. When he leaves and I have to watch him walk away, I lose my mind a little lol. It's like "there he goes, the thing I can never have". Very sad, but what can I do...
 
K

kshantaram

Premium Member
hope helps take stock, do share feedbacks,


moons gemini-pisces, square, unfriendly signs, lords mer-jup,
emotionally not compatible;

moon gemini, analytical, clever, general-knowledge, confused decision making;
moon pisces, sensitive, spiritual, ethical, traditional;


suns pisces-cap, 3/11, neutral signs, lords jup-sat;
merely dutiful relationship sans personal charm;
cap ambitious and hardworking;

ascendants acq-virgo, 6/8, unfriendly lords sat-mer, conflicts;
acq mystic, uncertain, airy, reformist, scientific;
virgo intellectual, perfectionist, critical attitude, self-centered;


non-compatible synastry.


moon gemini compatible with moons gemini, taurus, virgo, libra;


do ack and share ground experiences as relevant to the reading,


wishing well, kshantaram
 
J

justice

Member
kshantaram said:
hope helps take stock, do share feedbacks,


moons gemini-pisces, square, unfriendly signs, lords mer-jup,
emotionally not compatible;

moon gemini, analytical, clever, general-knowledge, confused decision making;
moon pisces, sensitive, spiritual, ethical, traditional;


suns pisces-cap, 3/11, neutral signs, lords jup-sat;
merely dutiful relationship sans personal charm;
cap ambitious and hardworking;

ascendants acq-virgo, 6/8, unfriendly lords sat-mer, conflicts;
acq mystic, uncertain, airy, reformist, scientific;
virgo intellectual, perfectionist, critical attitude, self-centered;


non-compatible synastry.


moon gemini compatible with moons gemini, taurus, virgo, libra;


do ack and share ground experiences as relevant to the reading,


wishing well, kshantaram
Click to expand...

This seems way too simplistic. We have all kinds of aspects, some really great and some obviously challenging. Also, our ascendants are in inconjunct signs but trine by aspect.
 
K

kshantaram

Premium Member
Appreciate the so prompt ack.

it is upto you to take the inputs,
that is why checking with the ground experiences about each other,
and how compatible you seem to yourselves,
and whether astrology is encouraging or discouraging
and what to note and adapt;

vedic astrology starts step backwards with moon star/constellation,
and stops there if not compatible;
and further compatibility of moon signs is fundamental;

then moves to the ascendant compatibility;
and then the 9th harmonic, and then the whole chart
and the current planetary periods at time of marriage;

often love marriages too break-up and find
the synastry not compatible to begin with;

no synastry is needed for true love; it is fated
and one decides to cope up with the marriage;

the fact that you are going for synastry
raises doubts into the relationship proposed,
not able to decide for oneself and mutually,
unless it is for mere astro curiosity.

the idea is to offer you humble basic astro inputs,
which you may like to consider for yourself judiciously.

we tend to ignore simplistic inputs when involved
and could make things complex for ourselves;

knowing each other and having coffee together,
and living with each other lifelong are different;
what is important is stability of the marriage union and adaptability.
divorce rates in the west are very high, life-long marriages very few;
legally conscious and financially-psychologically independent society.

glad you are able to read your own synastry,
these are mere preliminary fundamental inputs for your information.

hindu marriages are fundamentally meant to last life long,
wanting to live together even in future births;

thanks for responding promptly to the reading offered,


wishing well, kshantaram
 
Sweet Pea

Sweet Pea

Well-known member
Scorpio types don't have to be blatant about their sexuality, it just oozes out of them like an alluring kind of sticky 'temptation' to anyone around them that their energy field connects well with.

The fact that you have NN/Pluto in Scorpio PLUS Saturn on your Pisces Sun shows that self-mastery is your goal: mastery specifically of the emotional element. If you google Pluto self-mastery, you'll find plenty of articles, like this one -

http://www.myastrologybook.com/Pluto-in-astrology.htm

As I said, your impeccable behaviour IS the mastery of what you'd really like to do with him.

This is borne out by the fact that you have an airy Ascendant - you are meant to release the watery element and soar skywards like the eagle. You have probably heard that the Scorpio creature evolves from the serpent/snake, to the eagle, to the phoenix. You're well on your way... If you thought that the Scorpio Node/Pluto had to do with sex, this is only true at the lowest, snake/serpent level. For you, with NN/Pluto in Scorpio square your Sun and Mercury, it's about digging deep into your psyche to understand thoroughly your inner drives and the places (healthy, evolutionary ..... or the opposite) where they could take you. The unconscious patterns become conscious ones and astrology can help greatly with this.

And this is reflected by the way the composite Sun (and the upcoming eclipse) falls on your Ascendant, not on any watery part of your chart. That's the thing you have failed to grasp so far - the SUN, the biggest thing in the composite sky, is falling on your airy ascendant. Air, not water. Head stuff - detachment - an aerial view of it all - appreciation of the universe's clever mechanisms bringing us experiences that match the stately movement of the planets through the sky......I can't say whether the eclipse will make anything happen other than such internal realisations about what this is all about.

His close attention to your career is reflected by his Mars conjuncting your MC.

It seems that this relationship is now self-limiting, because you will be away from him in 2 weeks' time, probably just when Jupiter reaches your Jupiter again so it's likely to feel agonizing. But as Jupiter moves on, I think you will feel different. Once out of his energy field for starters, and if you don't "keep in touch" over social media and keep the watery fantasies alive, this can be laid to rest. It would be saner that way.
 
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J

justice

Member
Sweet Pea said:
Scorpio types don't have to be blatant about their sexuality, it just oozes out of them like an alluring kind of sticky 'temptation' to anyone around them that their energy field connects well with.

The fact that you have NN/Pluto in Scorpio PLUS Saturn on your Pisces Sun shows that self-mastery is your goal: mastery specifically of the emotional element. If you google Pluto self-mastery, you'll find plenty of articles, like this one -

http://www.myastrologybook.com/Pluto-in-astrology.htm

As I said, your impeccable behaviour IS the mastery of what you'd really like to do with him.

This is borne out by the fact that you have an airy Ascendant - you are meant to release the watery element and soar skywards like the eagle. You have probably heard that the Scorpio creature evolves from the serpent/snake, to the eagle, to the phoenix. You're well on your way... If you thought that the Scorpio Node/Pluto had to do with sex, this is only true at the lowest, snake/serpent level. For you, with NN/Pluto in Scorpio square your Sun and Mercury, it's about digging deep into your psyche to understand thoroughly your inner drives and the places (healthy, evolutionary ..... or the opposite) where they could take you. The unconscious patterns become conscious ones and astrology can help greatly with this.

And this is reflected by the way the composite Sun (and the upcoming eclipse) falls on your Ascendant, not on any watery part of your chart. That's the thing you have failed to grasp so far - the SUN, the biggest thing in the composite sky, is falling on your airy ascendant. Air, not water. Head stuff - detachment - an aerial view of it all - appreciation of the universe's clever mechanisms bringing us experiences that match the stately movement of the planets through the sky......I can't say whether the eclipse will make anything happen other than such internal realisations about what this is all about.

His close attention to your career is reflected by his Mars conjuncting your MC.

It seems that this relationship is now self-limiting, because you will be away from him in 2 weeks' time, probably just when Jupiter reaches your Jupiter again so it's likely to feel agonizing. But as Jupiter moves on, I think you will feel different. Once out of his energy field for starters, and if you don't "keep in touch" over social media and keep the watery fantasies alive, this can be laid to rest. It would be saner that way.
Click to expand...

Your post was the cherry on top to an interesting dream I had the night before. I am sure he and I have some telepathic/psychic thing going on with all that Neptune, Pisces conjunctions and his Sun in my 12th. He came to me in the dream with a clear message. I was thinking to meet him for coffee before I leave--which will have been the first time we ever "planned" to meet. I will not see him now or keep contact when I'm gone, I may even leave without saying a word (but that, I have not firmly decided yet).

You are right, though. It kept creeping up to me that the lesson with him was mastering myself through resistance. Earnestly, I hold myself to very high standards and I do not have the heart or gall to have an affair without crumbling in guilt and self-punishment. The damage and pain of going through it would be marginally worse than what I feel now in attempting to stay away. Part of the predicament was that he held the characteristics of my dream man (see post to SagCapp88 for details), I came to see this right around that time I'd begun to lose hope in men of my generation--which was why the attraction was unbelievably difficult to ward off.

The Plutonic drive truly deludes you into thinking you can never find a thing like "this" (whatever "this" may be) and next thing you know, you are holding on for dear life, for fear of missing out or losing a thing (you never really had to begin with anyway)--pushing you to extremes, even: compromising morals, giving away power, moving mountains and potentially hurting others in the process just to lay claim on the object of desire--even if the claim is fleeting, hardly a thing to brag about, and ultimately based on a fantasy (Pisces). It is true, Pluto plays on the nervous system and intensifies our belief in "lack", if we are not careful and thankful. I kept thinking, I will never find someone like him--maybe I should just "experience" him while I can. The world is too vast and unpredictable for such a pitiful "never". I do pray I have a husband one day that is like him, in many ways. If he exists, someone else surely does. What a staunch and excruciating realization...

But to drive in your point, I think the lesson was the same for him. His Scorpio Venus squares his North Node in Aquarius (which squares my Node). The lesson for him, it seems, is to carefully discern when (and how much) to give in to the desires and pleasures of Venus, and sometimes doing so goes against his soul's growth. I am sure with my Pluto-NN conjunction on Venus-Jupiter squaring his North node, he must have felt he was up against a lot of temptation. In a way, backing away from each other was really the most "loving" and empowering thing to do. At the soul level, we are friends. I know he knows this. This cannot be the case, however, in the manifest world and I must make my peace with this.

Sincerely--thank you, Sweet Pea, for sharing your insights and using your platform and understanding to assist me in accepting what I was refusing to acknowledge. Not knowing is one thing, but to evade what one knows is a true betrayal of self. I can never forget that. Thank you, again.
 
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