Mother-daughter synastry & lots of Neptune

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moonriver33

Member
My 3 year old daughter is my world and she’s all I have. I want so badly to be a good mother and have the relationship with her I longed to have with my own mother. I am scared about our synastry, which is filled with harsh Neptune aspects.
Her Neptune squares my Gemini venus and mars. My Neptune squares her cancer moon. Her Neptune trines my Cancer sun.

We have good aspects too. My Saturn trines her Gemini mercury, we have venus sextile venus, her Moon trine my Pluto, my Libra moon trines her Gemini sun.
If anyone is familiar with family/non-romantic synastry, how should these Neptune aspects play out? Neptune Square Mars is the tightest aspect in the synastry.
 
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katydid

Well-known member
moonriver33 said:
My 3 year old daughter is my world and she’s all I have. I want so badly to be a good mother and have the relationship with her I longed to have with my own mother. I am scared about our synastry, which is filled with harsh Neptune aspects.
Her Neptune squares my Gemini venus and mars. My Neptune squares her cancer moon. Her Neptune trines my Cancer sun.

We have good aspects too. My Saturn trines her Gemini mercury, we have venus sextile venus, her Moon trine my Pluto, my Libra moon trines her Gemini sun.
If anyone is familiar with family/non-romantic synastry, how should these Neptune aspects play out? Neptune Square Mars is the tightest aspect in the synastry.
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First of all, you two have some very wonderful aspects together---so do not blow this Neptune stuff out of proportion. :love:

Venus sextile Venus, Moon trine Sun, Moon trine Pluto, Saturn trine Mercury--All of these help to build a nice supportive network of understanding and solid communication.


Now, as to the Neptune issues---I think you spelled it out for yourself by saying these words:

"...daughter is my world and she’s all I have. I want so badly to be a good mother.."


You seem to be putting a lot of pressure on yourself and her, by making her your 'entire world', and saying 'she is all you have.' That puts a very intense focus upon her, and perhaps you should try and expand your life a little, to alleviate some of that intensely narrow focus. :bandit:

For her to feel a healthy relationship with you, she might not want to feel that she is your entire world and she is all you have. That is a lot of internal pressure.

I think she would rather see you having close friendships, maybe some romantic ones, or not---but a somewhat larger world than just her.

As you say, you never felt you had the love and attention and nurturing that you should have had. So obviously you really want to give that to your child. That is a positive thing. But be careful not to over do it. :pouty:

Neptune square Moon. And Neptune square Venus/Mars. :ninja:

The Neptune squares can be positive, in that they can make you both very sensitive and attuned to each other and you both want to have an emotional connection.

But my concern is that you could both misread or misinterpret each other.

Your Neptune squares her Cancer moon. At times, you may not see clearly what it is she needs. You may mistake your own sensitivity, baggage, old wounds, for her own needs/feelings/desires.

She may need independence, as she matures, when you respond with enabling or 'dependent' building reactions, because of your own troubled childhood.

So it will be of vital importance, that you learn to communicate clearly with each other, about what is needed for her best interests/growth.

For example, her Cancer Moon will endow her with great emotional strength, but also a certain amount of emotional turbulence. :unsure:

Especially as adolescence approaches, she will have some tantrums etc.

Your neptune square will be impacting her emotions. You MIGHT take her tantrums too personally and give in too easily. She may need boundaries, wherein you would be too yielding?
 
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moonriver33

Member
katydid said:
First of all, you two have some very wonderful aspects together---so do not blow this Neptune stuff out of proportion. :love:

Venus sextile Venus, Moon trine Sun, Moon trine Pluto, Saturn trine Mercury--All of these help to build a nice supportive network of understanding and solid communication.


Now, as to the Neptune issues---I think you spelled it out for yourself by saying these words:

"...daughter is my world and she’s all I have. I want so badly to be a good mother.."


You seem to be putting a lot of pressure on yourself and her, by making her your 'entire world', and saying 'she is all you have.' That puts a very intense focus upon her, and perhaps you should try and expand your life a little, to alleviate some of that intensely narrow focus. :bandit:

For her to feel a healthy relationship with you, she might not want to feel that she is your entire world and she is all you have. That is a lot of internal pressure.

I think she would rather see you having close friendships, maybe some romantic ones, or not---but a somewhat larger world than just her.

As you say, you never felt you had the love and attention and nurturing that you should have had. So obviously you really want to give that to your child. That is a positive thing. But be careful not to over do it. :pouty:

Neptune square Moon. And Neptune square Venus/Mars. :ninja:

The Neptune squares can be positive, in that they can make you both very sensitive and attuned to each other and you both want to have an emotional connection.

But my concern is that you could both misread or misinterpret each other.

Your Neptune squares her Cancer moon. At times, you may not see clearly what it is she needs. You may mistake your own sensitivity, baggage, old wounds, for her own needs/feelings/desires.

She may need independence, as she matures, when you respond with enabling or 'dependent' building reactions, because of your own troubled childhood.

So it will be of vital importance, that you learn to communicate clearly with each other, about what is needed for her best interests/growth.

For example, her Cancer Moon will endow her with great emotional strength, but also a certain amount of emotional turbulence. :unsure:

Especially as adolescence approaches, she will have some tantrums etc.

Your neptune square will be impacting her emotions. You MIGHT take her tantrums too personally and give in too easily. She may need boundaries, wherein you would be too yielding?
Click to expand...


I guess I did exaggerate with that. What I mean is I’ve lived through one trauma after another for as long as I’ve been alive, and in the past 6 years especially, my daughter is the only pure and good thing left in my life now. Her father, who’s gone, was a narcissist, abusive, very Plutonic relationship. My best friend, who lived with me for years, my closest friend since we were 6 years old, very deep soul connection, ended up sleeping with my fiancée 2 months before we were supposed to get married, then disappeared out of thin air forever. My fiancée stalked me, tried to kill me, and spread terrible lies about me to everyone I was friends with until I was left alone, except for my daughter. I’ve become very alienated from my family, and it’s become very impossible trust anyone at all. My daughter is such a beautiful contrast to all of the ugly going on.
As for Neptune Square Moon, I have it in my natal and in every romantic relationship I’ve had. I think I have a good handle on how it plays out when I’m the Neptune person, and I know how to work with it. It’s the others that scare me because I have no experience with them. I’ve read a lot of interpretations on Venus square Neptune saying the love is an illusion. With my history, you can see how that’s a terrifying thing for me to hear. Is it really an illusion, or maybe paranoia on Venus’ part that it could be?
 
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EsmerSilver

Active member
My mum and I had a lot of Neptune in synastry and composite. It basically is like this. No sense of boundaries, you invade each other's personal space. And remain delusional about the nature of your relationship, oveer time the more spiritually mature person feels exhausted and wants to put it(the relationship) on the backseat...but then the other person is like---"I never harmed you, that never happened, you are imagining things, we Love EACH OTHER" the person who wants to leave stays, eventually helping further the delusions of the other person. If you have and psychological disorders and diseases, this aspect COULD intensify it. And yes a lot of denial of abuse , about the nature of the people involved as well as that of the relationship itself. It also feels like a co-dependent relationship, wbere if you possibly leave the other person could end up harming themselves or people around them. This aspect intensifies if you have natal aspects to neptune, a pisces or virgo sun, moon or ascendent.
 
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