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  #1  
Unread 11-17-2019, 02:53 PM
MajorTom MajorTom is offline
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Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life

Hey! The reason Iím here is that lately Iíve noticed feeling myself very hopeless and sad in regards to my romantic life, which is absent.

Iím that kind of person who waits for someone very special, but she doesnít seem to appear in my life (I hope, yet).

Interestingly, I have positive feelings concerning my career paths in future (I play/write music and do acting, and love storytelling in general), and am very keen on gaining experience and learning everything new in these fields (so far though I stay at the job which I donít really like, but I need money Currently I do graphic design, which I do like in some of its forms, but not in that which Iím doing now). And those two things come so naturally; even other people have pointed that out, and Iím glad my performances can be liked by people. In short, I feel very happy about this aspect of my life; I know I need to work on it, and I gladly am/will! (Although I have to mention that these days I've started to feel down because of my current job, but usually the outlook is positive).

But I canít shake the feeling that I wonít be able to find someone to have a relationship with, and share my joy for the things I love (these that Iíve mentioned before for instance). Itís not that I suffer without it, or need it for ďfixingĒ me. Itís just that I feel that I already have a lot to love to give, but thereís no oneís around to give to. I mean, maybe there are, but I need to actually love the person. Maybe it would be much easier if I was into one night stands, but Iím just not. Probably I could do it, but thatís not what Iím looking for.

I do have friends whom I love dearly (platonic love is a big thing for me too). But I really am waiting for something else.

Should I actively, like, search it? Iíve tried it, but that doesnít seem to work, and I love meeting people in real life, organically so to say. So Iím just continuing to live my life with this feeling in the back of my mind (which becomes increasingly louder to be honest).

https://pasteboard.co/IjyHQRH.png

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  #2  
Unread 11-18-2019, 12:55 AM
CapAquaPis's Avatar
CapAquaPis CapAquaPis is offline
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Unhappy Re: Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life

Can you post your natal chart to find out what's wrong with your love life? My own has a double Aquarius (sun/moon conjunction) and that's one of 3 sign combinations with the least likely to have romance, Capricorn and Aquarius sun/moon combos ruled by the loner planet Saturn (modern ruler of Capricorn and traditional ruler of Aquarius). And other features in astrology can indicate a small chance of finding a lover.
__________________
or , I have the same ruling planets: Uranus and Saturn. I see the Cancer rising. Aries in the MC and Venus was her name!
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  #3  
Unread 11-18-2019, 08:50 AM
katydid katydid is offline
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Re: Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life

"Iím that kind of person who waits for someone very special..."

That^^^ statement worries me a little, after seeing your triple exact conjunction of Sun/Saturn/Venus in Aries, squaring your Moon.

The Sun in Aries represents self confidence. Venus in Aries is the development of your romantic relationships. But SATURN, sits right exactly between those two principles ; Self confidence and romantic love--- and blocks and limits their growth.

Saturn does have the ability to build a strong foundation and cement a loving relationship, and help you form a strong bond with a lover.

HOWEVER, it also delays, inhibits and denies those romantic relationships if you are fearful, and insecure.

Saturn symbolizes our personal doubts and fears, and restrictions placed upon us by our life circumstances.

So the way you stated your situation---" Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life"----is a big red flag for me.

That tells me that you are possibly allowing your Saturn principle to delay and repress your self confidence and ability to give and accept romantic love.

You do have a tension aspect, a square, between that triple Aries conjunction and your Moon in Cap in the house of love affairs.

I think this describes your statement at the top of this post:
"Iím that kind of person who waits for someone very special..."

This concerns me because 'waiting' is Capricorn/Saturn. You are 'waiting' as opposed to doing or creating or fully being engaged.

Waiting for your 'special' person just gives you permission not to act...and Not to fully engage and date and take chances and have flings while you are waiting.

Saturn [waiting] is blocking you from that energetic, self confident creative Aries masculine life force, that women desire. YOU HAVE THAT. They are attracted to it.

But then you somehow deny them, push them back, stall them, while you 'decide' if they are special enough for you to think about .....too late. By then the creative, excitement, and romantic spark is done. it's gone...

Google and read as much as you can about Saturn conjunct Venus and Saturn square Moon and Saturn conjunct the Sun. And Venus square Moon and Moon in Capricorn and in the 5th.

Things will start falling into place for you as you dig a little deeper into this powerful triple conjunction. You have the ability to build and develop lovely romantic partnerships. It just takes some time and some effort to figure out what is blocking you and what you need to do to clear the blockage.
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  #4  
Unread 11-18-2019, 08:55 AM
katydid katydid is offline
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Re: Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life

I would add that the square to the 5th house Cap Moon can indicate high expectations that you want others to meet. You might not realise that you even do this.

But others might feel that you have impossible expectations for that 'special' person and you may be too picky or unrealistic?
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  #5  
Unread 11-18-2019, 10:24 AM
MajorTom MajorTom is offline
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Re: Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life

Quote:
Originally Posted by CapAquaPis View Post
Can you post your natal chart to find out what's wrong with your love life? My own has a double Aquarius (sun/moon conjunction) and that's one of 3 sign combinations with the least likely to have romance, Capricorn and Aquarius sun/moon combos ruled by the loner planet Saturn (modern ruler of Capricorn and traditional ruler of Aquarius). And other features in astrology can indicate a small chance of finding a lover.
Hey! It's right there in my post, there's a link to it in the bottom of my message. And thanks in advance!

Also, as far as I know I have some Aquarius/Neptunian placements, maybe that could contribute as well

Last edited by MajorTom; 11-18-2019 at 12:54 PM.
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  #6  
Unread 11-18-2019, 10:52 AM
MajorTom MajorTom is offline
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Posts: 42
Re: Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life

Quote:
Originally Posted by katydid View Post
"I’m that kind of person who waits for someone very special..."

That^^^ statement worries me a little, after seeing your triple exact conjunction of Sun/Saturn/Venus in Aries, squaring your Moon.

The Sun in Aries represents self confidence. Venus in Aries is the development of your romantic relationships. But SATURN, sits right exactly between those two principles ; Self confidence and romantic love--- and blocks and limits their growth.

Saturn does have the ability to build a strong foundation and cement a loving relationship, and help you form a strong bond with a lover.

HOWEVER, it also delays, inhibits and denies those romantic relationships if you are fearful, and insecure.

Saturn symbolizes our personal doubts and fears, and restrictions placed upon us by our life circumstances.

So the way you stated your situation---" Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life"----is a big red flag for me.

That tells me that you are possibly allowing your Saturn principle to delay and repress your self confidence and ability to give and accept romantic love.

You do have a tension aspect, a square, between that triple Aries conjunction and your Moon in Cap in the house of love affairs.

I think this describes your statement at the top of this post:
"I’m that kind of person who waits for someone very special..."

This concerns me because 'waiting' is Capricorn/Saturn. You are 'waiting' as opposed to doing or creating or fully being engaged.

Waiting for your 'special' person just gives you permission not to act...and Not to fully engage and date and take chances and have flings while you are waiting.

Saturn [waiting] is blocking you from that energetic, self confident creative Aries masculine life force, that women desire. YOU HAVE THAT. They are attracted to it.

But then you somehow deny them, push them back, stall them, while you 'decide' if they are special enough for you to think about .....too late. By then the creative, excitement, and romantic spark is done. it's gone...

Google and read as much as you can about Saturn conjunct Venus and Saturn square Moon and Saturn conjunct the Sun. And Venus square Moon and Moon in Capricorn and in the 5th.

Things will start falling into place for you as you dig a little deeper into this powerful triple conjunction. You have the ability to build and develop lovely romantic partnerships. It just takes some time and some effort to figure out what is blocking you and what you need to do to clear the blockage.

Hey; thank you so much for your input!

Quote:
This concerns me because 'waiting' is Capricorn/Saturn. You are 'waiting' as opposed to doing or creating or fully being engaged.
Well yeah, there is an issue of me sort of holding myself back, I've been thinking about this just today; and am not always doing anything active about it.

Quote:
Saturn [waiting] is blocking you from that energetic, self confident creative Aries masculine life force, that women desire. YOU HAVE THAT. They are attracted to it.
Well that's very nice to know, thanks for the confidence boost hahhah; I just don't know exactly how to get rid of that blocking fear; I'm too afraid of being disappointed it seems

Quote:
But then you somehow deny them, push them back, stall them, while you 'decide' if they are special enough for you to think about .....too late. By then the creative, excitement, and romantic spark is done. it's gone...



Quote:
You have the ability to build and develop lovely romantic partnerships. It just takes some time and some effort to figure out what is blocking you and what you need to do to clear the blockage.
Well, I guess I know what's blocking me

The matter is that I'm a gay female, but for some reason I'm still struggling with embracing and expressing this part of me fully, and I'm very very willing to just live my life without being judged or questioned why I am like this. And I have this fear of not being able to actually be genuinely liked by a girl, but I desperately want to (although for some reason that seems so far away). I mean, usually I feel confident with how I carry myself, I take pride in that masculinity that I do have, intertwined with femininity in an intrinsic way, an I do get a lot of attention, but! I still have to learn how to accept the love, for some reason that doesn't come as easily as I would like it to. That's all very complicated tbh, and I know I have to do a loooottt of inner work to mend that.

Quote:
Saturn symbolizes our personal doubts and fears, and restrictions placed upon us by our life circumstances.
Yeah well that's exactly it :/

Last edited by MajorTom; 11-18-2019 at 10:55 AM.
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  #7  
Unread 11-18-2019, 11:00 AM
MajorTom MajorTom is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2019
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Re: Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life

Quote:
Originally Posted by katydid View Post
I would add that the square to the 5th house Cap Moon can indicate high expectations that you want others to meet. You might not realise that you even do this.

But others might feel that you have impossible expectations for that 'special' person and you may be too picky or unrealistic?
Well maybe, yes

I mean, I usually get along with different people quite easily, and have a genuine interest in meeting new folks, but when it comes to really close friendships or potential relationships, it's quite hard to find someone in whom I could be invested

I don't want to come off as snobbish or too picky, but it's really hard for me to actually "vibe" with many people, you know? I would really love to have this experience with a bigger number of people, of course
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  #8  
Unread 11-19-2019, 10:06 PM
katydid katydid is offline
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Re: Don't feel confident enough in the development of my romantic/sexual life

Quote:
Originally Posted by MajorTom View Post
Well maybe, yes

I mean, I usually get along with different people quite easily, and have a genuine interest in meeting new folks, but when it comes to really close friendships or potential relationships, it's quite hard to find someone in whom I could be invested

I don't want to come off as snobbish or too picky, but it's really hard for me to actually "vibe" with many people, you know? I would really love to have this experience with a bigger number of people, of course
So, if you would sincerely love to have this vibing experience with a larger audience, then that could be your first goal.

How can you open up to more people? How can you widen your 'vibe' meter?

Saturn shuts others down too quickly. Counts them out too early.

Maybe your first step could be to watch yourself as you make these subconscious decisions or reactions---second guess yourself. Be more open to others.

If someone is attracted to you, interested in you, STAY OPEN TO IT.

Go out of your comfort zone. Your comfort zone is blocking you, keeping you isolated.
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