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  #7926  
Unread 10-29-2019, 08:42 PM
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

The angel of death Kamael is attributed to the sepiroth Geburah in the hermetic kabbalah. Do you think there is a divinly just space for bloodshed and destruction? Is it your opinion that all carnage is anti-creation?

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  #7927  
Unread 10-29-2019, 09:07 PM
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Originally Posted by passiflora View Post
David, your generator is diesel?

Ukpoohbear youíre exactly right, my problem is there wasnít an ethics. And i get a little annoyed when inside and outside are equated with down and up lol.

Warriors are interesting. Most ancient warriors have internal codes of ethics, but not sure about ethics of who you fight for. Not sure how that plays out in modern.
My friend Janne is an old soul warrior type. Heís been a psychopath before. The way he describes it like is Michael will use any type of soul for Godís work, so even a seemingly lost and karmicslly damaged warrior psychopath could be useful for exacting revenge on anotherís psychopath who needed stopping. He still lives with the consequences of being such a good warrior, he carries around a shadow that scares people away and he is very lonely but he has learnt his lessons well.

He thinks Iím an ancient warrior who made a mistake and it sent me on lifetimes of having to pay for that. I had a past life memory where I killed a witch because I thought it was the right thing to do but Janne said the person I killed just because they did black magic was maybe on a mission from god and I had to pay the ultimate price.

Although I agree killing the witch was a very young soul, impetuous thing to do and I had to pay for my sins, I think Iím an older soul than him and his ego prevents him from giving anyone the bigger sword. I think thereís a possibility Iíve been reincarnating as a warrior of Michael for centuries and Iím basically an old soul, older than him. I could be wrong, but at least Iím open to being wrong.
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  #7928  
Unread 10-29-2019, 09:23 PM
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

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The angel of death Kamael is attributed to the sepiroth Geburah in the hermetic kabbalah. Do you think there is a divinly just space for bloodshed and destruction? Is it your opinion that all carnage is anti-creation?
Imagine that an ancient rat/spider race decided to emprison millions of souls within a system that these rats/spiders could use to feed of the other souls. I doubt that anyone would just be able to forgive and "move on" without any karmic balance. I think a much more heavy hand would be needed in a "case scenario" like that and it would be judged as just (and even kind like Jupiteras likes to say ).

Y
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  #7929  
Unread 10-30-2019, 03:23 AM
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

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Originally Posted by SunConjunctUranus View Post
So basically, your intuition leads you to help others through Saturn's help? Yes, Saturn, which is an avatar who even eats his own children? That is truly not the way to give love to others, but rather plunging people to worship the black stone in the whore of Babylon. And that avatar will be the main antagonist in the final eschatology of the people who are always stand with the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.

Deus Vult!
More like... my intuition is guiding me to embrace the qualities associated with Saturn such as restriction, discipline, temperance, and self control


contrary to what a being like myself given to impulse and unruliness is inclined to think, true freedom can only be attained through balancing out the reckless self with discipline


otherwise it's like intense, frenetic energy going in any and every direction is chooses, but with this balance, it's like you're choosing where to direct your intense energies and where not to. Therefore, more powerful, able to make your visions become a reality
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  #7930  
Unread 10-30-2019, 03:57 AM
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

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Originally Posted by Ukpoohbear View Post
Iím so glad youíre back Lykan. Iím really grateful for the friends Iíve met on this forum and youíre one of them. Youíre full of charisma plus I like that you already have a good balance between the light and dark a powerful badass who is NICE. Life is hard but it sure helps when you discover the general pattern/rule/meaning behind it all.

I was reading a website called the Michael teachings. It talks about different soul ages. Mature souls and old souls are the two oldest types, I think I may be a mature soul because theyíre concerned with relationship karma but then I read about old souls and one of the symptoms is feeling tired (I can remember saying to a psychiatric nurse when I was in hospital for a month when I was 17 that I would be happy to go straight from here to an old folks home) but it also said old souls donít reach old soul status until the 35 year mark and pass through the other levels themes before then. That makes sense why I Ďdiedí when I was at school age and appreciated death from an age that usually old people usually only start thinking about (my english teacher told me that,) which makes me think I will soon transcend my obsession with relationships and be primarily concerned with worldly affairs from then on. OR I could be a mature soul but if Iím a mature soul then that means you feel even more tired by the time youíre an old soul! The thought of that is hard to handle because Iím very tired, so I think Iím an old soul. Iíve considered itís wishful thinking but I certainly am not concerned with achieving or learning anything outside of my own mind, another sign of an old soul.

Sound familiar? Because youíre already clued up on spiritual matters and are a bit younger than me, so Iím guessing youíre the same. Sure, it feels a bit like a medal but only 5%, 95% itís just a relief that the pain has a path, a purpose, there is a purpose to this pain. Itís like fighting in the dark and being given a light bulb, or a generator and battery chargers to navigate with.

I must add that there is no hierarchy to them though, a young soul concerned with achieving power and status is as powerful as any. I mean, it depends when you came into existence and a soul born in April is not any better than a soul born in September right?

There is a purpose! Light and consciousness exist! Just the relief is enough. But yeah, surely Iím an old soul because this **** is tiring.

Anyway, I could read your words all day. Youíre gonna inspire a **** ton of people with your words that speak truth so beautifully. My writing lacks a certain Venusian flair that yours has, I think Iím a better orator than a writer.

There are also soul types. I think Iím a sage because sages are the performers. I think youíre the artisan. So youíll be an artisan old soul and I would be a sage old soul.

CT, passiflora and David starling are the scholars. They like to learn and are very knowledgable.
I'm still learning about light and darkness because I recognize a darkness in myself. I've been contemplating lately if I need to expel it from myself, or if instead, the being I'm supposed to become will have control of both light and dark forces calling upon both when necessary and in the ways that are warranted

Last full moon really brought out the beast in me. I would truly call that energy bestial and primal. It was very dark and I carried something destructive with me for a few days. I talked with some psychic friend who told me they definitely felt like the veil had thinned. Spirits were very active that during that full moon. I took it as a test and I was able to feel that dark energy and not act on it, but control and channel it. Not to get all NSFW, but those nights will be the absolute best ones for sex. I stg, I could've gone all night long with some incredibly intense sex!
But alas, I'm holding out for my soulmate. I know who she is, the time just isn't right

As far as soul ages, I haven't the slightest clue how old my soul is. And really, I believe we're all from a myriad of places around the cosmos and we all could be millions... billions... trillions of years old. But that's just my belief system

I will say I thought about death intensively from as far back as I can remember. As a small, small little bean I was fascinated with death as well as many 'macabre' subjects in general. and of course, I've had my myriad of near death experiences including as a baby

I think regardless of whether we'd be considered mature of old souls, we can feel our soul's grander truths, our inner guidance, intuition leading us

I will say sometimes I'm very inclined to feel tired and exasperated and especially feeling misplaced in this world, but if I feel things like that, I reframe my mind. I try to remember the childlike wonder I've had in me, my intense curiosity, my raw desire to experience and explore and discover. A part of me is like an ancient soul looking over the entire universe, and the other part of me is like an eternal child. I prefer the child, but the ancient soul has her place as well

Btw, one thing I've learned over just the past 2 months is that we can transform ourselves into whatever we want to. This world makes us think we have to struggle through self limiting beliefs, anxieties, addictions, and whatever other things are holding us back, but it's as easy as realizing that we're the only ones who can give these things power over us. When I finally broke ties with my addiction once and for all, it was as easy as taking that power in one swift, effortless move. They'll tell us that once you're an addict, you're always an addict, but that's not true. We're not stuck with anything, we can change anything and become whoever we need to be

We can release lifelong anxieties and selflimiting beliefs in days, maybe weeks, but it never has to be years unless we choose to let it linger there for years. I wish I'd known that before because then I would've realized all of what plagued me I could've dropped a long time ago, but I suppose I had to struggle through it all to finally see through the illusion

As far as writing. Thank you for that compliment on my style :P I appreciate that. I'm very much shifting gears atm. I'll always be a writer and especially a poet, but there are also other things I want to do. I know I talked about them already. I'm veering into music and also pushing the boundaries of language to the point of reaching down to the core and creating something new

I'm not at all sure what I'm gonna be. Things are gonna be changing a lot for me this next year because I've finally reached the point where I'm ready to turn myself into who I want to be and do the things I've always wanted to

I realize I have a throat chakra block. I need to clear it. I'll be using my voice a lot more in my life as I move forward and it'll play a major role for me I believe. I'm not a gifted orator at all, but I think I have the potential at least. Just like you have the potential to be the writer you want to be



Looking at the soul types, I relate to them all actually. I'd say I'm every soul type
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  #7931  
Unread 10-30-2019, 03:59 AM
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

I'm the Shaman, the Server, the Warrior, the Artisan, the Sage, the Scholar, the Priest, and the King(or even higher, the Queen)
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  #7932  
Unread 10-30-2019, 05:29 AM
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

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Originally Posted by Lykanized View Post
I'm the Shaman, the Server, the Warrior, the Artisan, the Sage, the Scholar, the Priest, and the King(or even higher, the Queen)
Major reason why it's hard to trump astrology, if you're going for a "typology". The finality of being represented by one's time and place at birth vs. what one relates to, which can be anything depending on where in your life-cycle you find yourself.

I know of a similar kind of typology that uses Jungian archetypes - that one has things like the "child", "magician" etc. A quick google search could unearth it, but I'm not even motivated to do that. But even with is, I've at least encountered some of the books written by followers of Jung's archetypes, and they outline a possibility to conjure up in oneself the untapped archetype when in a rut or when the stage of life calls for it. I'm thinking of "The Hero Within" by Carol S. Pearson as one such example.
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Last edited by conspiracy theorist; 10-30-2019 at 05:36 AM.
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  #7933  
Unread 10-31-2019, 12:51 AM
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Originally Posted by Lykanized View Post
I'm still learning about light and darkness because I recognize a darkness in myself. I've been contemplating lately if I need to expel it from myself, or if instead, the being I'm supposed to become will have control of both light and dark forces calling upon both when necessary and in the ways that are warranted

Last full moon really brought out the beast in me. I would truly call that energy bestial and primal. It was very dark and I carried something destructive with me for a few days. I talked with some psychic friend who told me they definitely felt like the veil had thinned. Spirits were very active that during that full moon. I took it as a test and I was able to feel that dark energy and not act on it, but control and channel it. Not to get all NSFW, but those nights will be the absolute best ones for sex. I stg, I could've gone all night long with some incredibly intense sex!
But alas, I'm holding out for my soulmate. I know who she is, the time just isn't right

As far as soul ages, I haven't the slightest clue how old my soul is. And really, I believe we're all from a myriad of places around the cosmos and we all could be millions... billions... trillions of years old. But that's just my belief system

I will say I thought about death intensively from as far back as I can remember. As a small, small little bean I was fascinated with death as well as many 'macabre' subjects in general. and of course, I've had my myriad of near death experiences including as a baby

I think regardless of whether we'd be considered mature of old souls, we can feel our soul's grander truths, our inner guidance, intuition leading us

I will say sometimes I'm very inclined to feel tired and exasperated and especially feeling misplaced in this world, but if I feel things like that, I reframe my mind. I try to remember the childlike wonder I've had in me, my intense curiosity, my raw desire to experience and explore and discover. A part of me is like an ancient soul looking over the entire universe, and the other part of me is like an eternal child. I prefer the child, but the ancient soul has her place as well

Btw, one thing I've learned over just the past 2 months is that we can transform ourselves into whatever we want to. This world makes us think we have to struggle through self limiting beliefs, anxieties, addictions, and whatever other things are holding us back, but it's as easy as realizing that we're the only ones who can give these things power over us. When I finally broke ties with my addiction once and for all, it was as easy as taking that power in one swift, effortless move. They'll tell us that once you're an addict, you're always an addict, but that's not true. We're not stuck with anything, we can change anything and become whoever we need to be

We can release lifelong anxieties and selflimiting beliefs in days, maybe weeks, but it never has to be years unless we choose to let it linger there for years. I wish I'd known that before because then I would've realized all of what plagued me I could've dropped a long time ago, but I suppose I had to struggle through it all to finally see through the illusion

As far as writing. Thank you for that compliment on my style :P I appreciate that. I'm very much shifting gears atm. I'll always be a writer and especially a poet, but there are also other things I want to do. I know I talked about them already. I'm veering into music and also pushing the boundaries of language to the point of reaching down to the core and creating something new

I'm not at all sure what I'm gonna be. Things are gonna be changing a lot for me this next year because I've finally reached the point where I'm ready to turn myself into who I want to be and do the things I've always wanted to

I realize I have a throat chakra block. I need to clear it. I'll be using my voice a lot more in my life as I move forward and it'll play a major role for me I believe. I'm not a gifted orator at all, but I think I have the potential at least. Just like you have the potential to be the writer you want to be



Looking at the soul types, I relate to them all actually. I'd say I'm every soul type
Yeah Iím still learning about light and dark too, itís probably a never ending game but what I meant about how you have a good mix of both is you arenít one of these people who is overly nice (fake) and not expressing the darkness. People forget itís ok to be a dick sometimes, but most people are dicks for the wrong reasons but I think in some situations itís necessary.

Have you ever been in a bad mood and you carry an evil aura about you? Like a dark cloud that people pick up on? My spiritual friend Janne mentioned he uses it on purpose but I didnít really get what he meant, until I had a particularly stressful couple of days and after I was carrying round a dark cloud myself, it put my friend who I was visiting in a weird mood, sheís actually scared of it. So now I see what Janne was meaning. I think it scares people but you would need to be careful that if you use it you donít become it, since playing with energy is a very real thing. But yeah, I wanna try use it on purpose sometime, I think this is natural magic.

It actually ties in with what you said about being able to transform ourselves into whatever we want to, even though you meant in the positive sense.

I watched a YouTube video where a guy was talking about this exact thing. He says healers can burn themselves out by trying too hard to heal when you just need to believe in positivity and just be. Basically the jist is to not feed anything negative. At first I thought this was a bit insulting to those with cancer but after a few weeks of reflection, I think being insulting to those in pain is besides the point. Itís the same theory about not reacting to negative energy, something I need to learn lol but now I understand it, I can begin implementing it.

So yeah I agree with you about how nothing is a struggle or permanent and our world has it completely wrong! Itís a myth that we need to struggle to heal. What causes the struggle is the ego bit of course we need to go on a journey to understand all this.

Which is why I think being in the vicinity of such spiritual talk is a sign you are Ďoldí or spiritually evolved. Because some people donít get it. My GP thinks Iíve used this spiritual stuff as a crutch to get better and hey, of course I have, except itís also the complete truth as well! Itís jot a religion or a theory itís the secret of the universe! I thank the guy who first opened my eyes to it and itís a pleasure to go on the journey and share it. And youíll go on to share it when you meet someone lost too. Itís called light work

So I couldnít sleep last night and it got me thinking Iím maybe not an old soul because my preoccupation with it has egotistical roots. Not completely egotistical, I kinda look for people who are mature and at least trying to control their egoís, and donít take it personally when Iím being attacked or judged (however subtly) by those that are stuck in it.

So my preoccupation isnít completely egotistical but while unable to sleep last night, I realised how much of a mess I am. A sleepless night really helps ground me, itís a moment of still, which is why I should meditate. Without those sleepless nights, I get ahead of myself and think Iím doing ok when im actually just living my life like a headless chicken. Pain is actually grounding too but oh dear god pain and tragedy is scary. Life is traumatic.

Working on your throat chakra sounds like a good technique to work on social anxiety. I still have social anxiety but Iíve realised itís only real in group settings or dynamics that I retreat into my shell. Iím perfectly fine one on one. So like you said about how everything is positive we just need to believe it and not buy into the lie everything is a struggle, I think we need to do our processing of faults but also realise that itís ok to be quiet and weird in groups of people. I was the same at college, I couldnít speak because all the energy was overwhelming and I filled myself with blame and shame for it. Unfortunately, itís who we are. The memory of feeling that huge anxiety fills me with fear and self-hate. Eugh.

I think building psychic shields may be a good technique too, but I havenít gotten around to it yet. Hey, having a psychic shield and then that dark cloud shield are both pretty good weapons.

Last edited by Ukpoohbear; 10-31-2019 at 05:53 AM.
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  #7934  
Unread 10-31-2019, 12:52 AM
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Originally Posted by Lykanized View Post
I'm the Shaman, the Server, the Warrior, the Artisan, the Sage, the Scholar, the Priest, and the King(or even higher, the Queen)
God **** right the Queen should exist. Such quiet misogyny I didnít even realise. Itís time to make new archetypes.
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  #7935  
Unread 10-31-2019, 01:00 AM
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Imagine that an ancient rat/spider race decided to emprison millions of souls within a system that these rats/spiders could use to feed of the other souls. I doubt that anyone would just be able to forgive and "move on" without any karmic balance. I think a much more heavy hand would be needed in a "case scenario" like that and it would be judged as just (and even kind like Jupiteras likes to say ).

Y
I agree. The universe is a tough place and very cruel and unfair, but eventually, it all becomes fair. Just not in one lifetime. One lifetime is like a little movie.

This whole thing is a really weird thing. Like, existing and having to reincarnate to learn karma. Iím scared senseless about the whole truth of it all.

U
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  #7936  
Unread 10-31-2019, 01:03 AM
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

Iíve been experiencing glimpses of 5D recently, all the work has raised my vibration and opened a glimpse into a different dimension. Just glimpses though.

Sorry for over posting. I couldnít sleep lastnight so slept until 5pm today and now Iím awake at midnight.
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  #7937  
Unread 10-31-2019, 05:25 AM
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Originally Posted by Ukpoohbear View Post
I agree. The universe is a tough place and very cruel and unfair, but eventually, it all becomes fair. Just not in one lifetime. One lifetime is like a little movie.

This whole thing is a really weird thing. Like, existing and having to reincarnate to learn karma. Iím scared senseless about the whole truth of it all.

U
You didnít mind someone telling you that youíre paying with multiple lifetimes for some mistake made in one lifetime? That would upset me, like itís intrusive.
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  #7938  
Unread 10-31-2019, 05:50 AM
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You didnít mind someone telling you that youíre paying with multiple lifetimes for some mistake made in one lifetime? That would upset me, like itís intrusive.
It did upset me, even if karmically it made sense. It felt like I was being subordinated to him. Like he was projecting. But it also made sense.
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  #7939  
Unread 10-31-2019, 06:16 AM
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Originally Posted by Ukpoohbear View Post
It did upset me, even if karmically it made sense. It felt like I was being subordinated to him. Like he was projecting. But it also made sense.
i have noticed that those who are absolutely convinced about karmic rebirth as the cause of Natal-chart difficulties and/or advantages get very upset if one suggests it might be luck-of-the-draw, and totally random. Either way, you have to p!ay with the cards you're dealt.

Last edited by david starling; 10-31-2019 at 06:18 AM.
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  #7940  
Unread 10-31-2019, 03:03 PM
ynnest ynnest is offline
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

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Originally Posted by Ukpoohbear View Post
I agree. The universe is a tough place and very cruel and unfair, but eventually, it all becomes fair. Just not in one lifetime. One lifetime is like a little movie.

This whole thing is a really weird thing. Like, existing and having to reincarnate to learn karma. Iím scared senseless about the whole truth of it all.

U
Yeah like I said, a much more heavy hand would be needed in a "case scenario" like that.

Y
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  #7941  
Unread 10-31-2019, 03:23 PM
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It did upset me, even if karmically it made sense. It felt like I was being subordinated to him. Like he was projecting. But it also made sense.
A good story is grounding, but also liberating. Shouldnít trap you in a dependency.
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  #7942  
Unread 10-31-2019, 09:13 PM
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Originally Posted by david starling View Post
i have noticed that those who are absolutely convinced about karmic rebirth as the cause of Natal-chart difficulties and/or advantages get very upset if one suggests it might be luck-of-the-draw, and totally random. Either way, you have to p!ay with the cards you're dealt.
Very true. I did think he saw my north node as a potential new beginning, including the waning moon, but it could just as well mean the end of reincarnating for me so I came to the conclusion he didnít have the mental strength to consider he had messed up, which then led me to consider I could be healing him as much as heís been healing me. Heís sure got an ego on him though, but heís tried his best. But with egoís, they donít mind you suffering as long as they donít have to. I grew up with that and I hate it.
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  #7943  
Unread 10-31-2019, 09:16 PM
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A good story is grounding, but also liberating. Shouldnít trap you in a dependency.
Yeah I said I would move to Finland in a few years if I was available but after what heís said I would be silly to. Moonkat made me promise I wouldnít lol plus Iíve met somebody now anyway. Letís hope the current retrograde doesnít mess it up for me, it was love at first sight for us both. Plus Iím talking to another older man from California who I first met on a sugar daddy website when I was 21. Heís planning to come visit me next year.

I will be married with children by next year I could show you their chart in private, with your permission of course.
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  #7944  
Unread 10-31-2019, 09:16 PM
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

A womanís perspective is always good, and would be good to utilize a scholar.
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  #7945  
Unread 10-31-2019, 11:04 PM
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Yeah like I said, a much more heavy hand would be needed in a "case scenario" like that.

Y
Yeah like I said, the Universe is a tough place, like I said, yeah.

U
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  #7946  
Unread 10-31-2019, 11:13 PM
ynnest ynnest is offline
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

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Yeah like I said, the Universe is a tough place, like I said, yeah.

U
Yes and that is why a though hand is needed to deal with the "universe". The "universe" thinks its in control- Its not.

Y
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  #7947  
Unread 10-31-2019, 11:27 PM
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Yes and that is why a though hand is needed to deal with the "universe". The "universe" thinks its in control- Its not.

Y
Who or what is in control? Consciousness?

U
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  #7948  
Unread 10-31-2019, 11:36 PM
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Originally Posted by passiflora View Post
Happy to look, though cold reading isnít something I do!

Love at first sight? For both of you? Thatís amazing!
Yes for both of us. We have remarkably similar charts, although mike is the more powerful, if I say so myself. There are no Saturn contacts though which I had with my longest relationship of 5 years, so Iím worried it may not last. I have a feeling he wonít fulfill me for long but obviously I hope Iím wrong. But yes, we both fell in love.

I joined tinder one night and spoke to a couple guys. I didnít use my real photo and made myself two years younger. Before I gave him my WhatsApp details I told him it wasnít my real photo which he thought was intriguing. Anyway, last Thursday I invited him round to my friends house and I came round and opened the door and he was pleasantly surprised with his facial expression. I was a little (alot) drunk so I was giving him my banter and he was answering me back and keeping up with me. But more than that, we had this insane emotional connection that we both said. My friend saw us fall in love. Before he left he said Ďdonít go off me when youíre soberí and I laughed and mocked him, what I didnít remember is I told him I loved him and when he reminded me I said well yes it sounds like something I would say.

I have his birth time etc. I could post the chart in a post. Our charts are remarkably similar. Iíll pm you it. Do you want to just see his chart to compare with mine or will I get the composite or synastry?

But yeah, itís a real connection. Although I maybe unfulfilled just really because thereís no soul connection. The man from California is 52 and is fairly spiritual and has an elegance and patience this guy lacks, which i may genuinely feel unfulfilled without it from this guy. But the man from California isnít coming to visit me until next year, so if it doesnít work out with this guy then that one will be ready.

What can I say. I spent years alone and suddenly the universe has given me options. The first man is a gardener and isnít materialistic at all and is a stoner. The 2nd man is a millionaire. But itís aboit love at the end of the day.
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  #7949  
Unread 10-31-2019, 11:59 PM
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Ukpoohbear Ukpoohbear is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by passiflora View Post
Synastry, yes please.

I married for soul. Lots of people marry for money. The in between is a mysterious place to me. So much... stuff to work out, especially When raising kids together is involved.

California doesnít have a birth time? At least, a date?
Yep I have the California manís chart including birth time. His transits are interesting. Pluto is approaching to conjunct his Venus, which could be me.

Iíll post you both guys synastry with me. I already sent you the first mans chart just so you could see the layout and how similar it is to mine.

Yeah, soul all the way.
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  #7950  
Unread 11-01-2019, 03:27 AM
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Gemini888 Gemini888 is offline
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Re: Random Thoughts, strictly Text

Quote:
Originally Posted by passiflora View Post
Super interesting!
I usually like the north node with the partnerís first house rather than the seventh but thatís only one thing.
Unfortunately, Iím so tired my kids are trick or treating without me 😭
In my country Halloween isn't even a thing. It's just a fad when kids go out and do stupid things. So if it makes you you feel better, I'm stuck at home too, with a thesis to boost
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