What can I do to support him?

Initially I was very certain that a relationship with him will be bad for us both. He insisted that he wanted no one else. As expected, we both got in some troublesome and stressful situations together, while fighting all the time, for months. We have been together for several months more than a year now. At this point I am already think this is fate, as we were always brought back together at every attempt of separation. So I am trying my best to make this work.

He had always said he's actually depressed, but lately it seems worse. He used to be like an energizer bunny. Always laughing, going on projects, making friends everywhere...and I can't help but think this is my fault. I have been giving him more space, because probably my perpetual drama and negative energy were what brought him down. I have been minding how I say things and try not to come off as being critical of him.

But his depression seems to get worse? He sleeps more than half a day, doesn't have energy, keeps getting sick even though the doctor didn't find anything wrong, lost interest in things that used to excite him. I asked him what was wrong, and he said he was distressed over something that he can't tell me about yet. So that's that about the "why". He's been unusually sweet and pampering, and he doesn't fight back when I tried poking at him (figuratively).

I wonder how to support him better? Do I give him more space, or try to cheer him up? What NOT to do?

Chart: https://www.astro.com/cgi/showgif.cgi?lang=e&gif=astro_66gw_bunny_bear.73579.115602.png&res=100

chart expired
rahu

He gets depressed

We've been together for almost a year and a half. Our personality clash, but every time we were about to separate, something happened and brought us back together, even if things were hard. We spend a lot of time explaining misunderstandings to each other--if not outright fight about it.

He used to be a very high energy person who kept going project after project. He did say from the beginning that he was actually depressed, but as time went on he gets less and less excited about things. I thought it was because of me, because we kept either fighting or making love, going on a rollercoaster of emotion would wear out anyone. So I give him more space and am meeting him less. We used to meet everyday, now only every two weeks.

But it seems like things get worse for him instead? Nowadays he sleeps more than half a day, keeps getting sick even though the doctor said nothing is wrong. I asked him about his previous projects, but he was no longer interested in them. He said he's distressed about something that he can't tell me about yet, so that's that about the why. He's been very sweet, pampering, and no longer fights me back. I am grateful and I tell him that, but it also worries me because he's acting strange.

How to support him better, since he seems to be going through a rough time? Should I give him more space or keep texting him a lot as usual? He and I are coming from a very different place, therefore I turn to astrology in attempt to understand how to navigate this relationship better. I have been more mindful of my wording, as to not come off as too critical of him, and tried being less demanding. I admit it was something that I needed to fix. What else can I do?

He's an Aries, I'm a Cancer. I attached our chart.

Re: He gets depressed

You seem to have a nice comfortable composite chart together.
His moon is in very sensitive pisces, and squaring pluto is like digging a hole in water, he'll keep trying to get to the bottom of things but never get there.
Neptune transiting near his 2nd cusp of self-worth shows he is in a crisis of self-worth, low self-esteem.
That same moon governs his 6th of health, can you get him to have a check-up? It might be something basic that is manifesting as an emotional reaction, or it could be a simple hormonal issue.
The 6th is also everyday work, so that is also sitting there in limbo.
His moon ruler, Neptune, is undergoing the square from transiting Uranus at the moment, which should ease up after March.
Because your relationship seems healthy between the two of you, stay closer to him and try to push him to get himself checked out. Won't be easy since he's in this lethargic state, but try gently pushing... and pushing and a little pulling maybe.

Re: He gets depressed

ElenaJ said:

You seem to have a nice comfortable composite chart together.
His moon is in very sensitive pisces, and squaring pluto is like digging a hole in water, he'll keep trying to get to the bottom of things but never get there.
Neptune transiting near his 2nd cusp of self-worth shows he is in a crisis of self-worth, low self-esteem.
That same moon governs his 6th of health, can you get him to have a check-up? It might be something basic that is manifesting as an emotional reaction, or it could be a simple hormonal issue.
The 6th is also everyday work, so that is also sitting there in limbo.
His moon ruler, Neptune, is undergoing the square from transiting Uranus at the moment, which should ease up after March.
Because your relationship seems healthy between the two of you, stay closer to him and try to push him to get himself checked out. Won't be easy since he's in this lethargic state, but try gently pushing... and pushing and a little pulling maybe.

Click to expand...

Thank you very much for your answer! I'm actually surprised that you said we have a comfortable composite chart together...every free online reading I read said mostly bad things.

I will try to ask him to get his health checked up. Had been worried that this down time of his is a long term effect of the relationship, since just several weeks ago he said that this relationship was taking its toll on him and he almost couldn't take it anymore.

Re: He gets depressed

Sometimes when you are not well, you have a low tolerance for anything.
He's apathetic at the moment, so low threshold.
Needs patience and love, low profile though.
He's already consuming himself on his own, not a lot of energy left for others.

Re: He gets depressed

Spoiler alert: don't take it personal!

It is quite likely that your Moon in Scorpio is causing your partner a significant energy loss. Scorpio is a sign that consumes a lot of energy - all sorts of it (here I speak as a Scorpio Venus). And very often you may not even notice that you are leaving your significant ones empty and dry.
You partner's Sun in Aries it telling him "we can do anything", his Moon in Pisces is telling him "we can give everything", but his body can't agree.
My advice will be: spend more time with him, but don't talk much to each other (talking is the perfect way for "vampires" to consume one's energy and you are "vampiring" him without your will).
Instead activate your Sun in Cancer when you are with him. Care for him in feminine way and in silence - cook for him, clean for him, watch a movie together etc. But don't get involved in any discussions.
In the same time try to find a way to receive energy directly from the Universe - this is the best way for Scorpio.
That should work