Aspects signs of a cheater?/ Is she a Cheater?

Claire19 said:

Attention from our lovers, of course!!!! That is natural. However with her Venus Uranus Neptune square she may delude herself with love and not really see you for who you are and that is a danger.....Rose coloured glasses. Either you or her.. just try to be real about the situation without losing the feeling of love....

However this is often the essence of romantic love after all. sigh!! and why being "in love" mostly doesnt last.. THese aspects just doesnt do well with the reality of say, a committed marriage long term.

You need to just get on with your relationship and not brood over what is written here. Too much analysis is the death of love.......You cant protect yourself from hurt I am afraid. It is part of life.. and having the courage to love another.... Love is love and even if you suppress or deny it, is still there......

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Well if she ever is inclined to experiment, I'm sure it won't be as fun as it is with me A mistake that would have no worth only a guilty polluted conscience.

Thanks for the advice Claire,

I think I'm returning to my confident self again, Waybread is right, so what if she cheats? Mistakes are necessary for discovery and progress.

Wow, WA! Your kind remark just made my day!

I've been married (2x) for a long time, and something that I am constantly learning is the need to accept some things we don't admire about our partner/spouse, in the hope that they do the same thing for us. As Robert Burns put it, "O would some power the giftie gie us, to see ourselves as others see us." In other words, you might relax about your GF harmlessly flirting at parties, and she might relax about your need for reassurance that your relationship is solid.

I'd be happy to take a look at your composite chart, but if you don't have an accurate birth time for your GF, then just say so, as one then has to read the chart without houses, plus the acknowledgement that the moon could move around a bit.

Traditional astrologers will disagree with me, but I wish the whole idea of death prediction will just go away. There is a long thread on it on this forum somewhere, fairly recently; I've expressed my opinions there.

If you think about it, 1/12 of the human race, or probably something like half a billion people will have an 8th house sun. If they were especially prone to early or unusually crummy deaths, I think the life insurance industry would be all over this one by now. Traditional astrologers have more sophisticated methods for death prediction, and they are nowhere near as simplistic as the sun in the 8th house.

I think 8th house sun people tend to be rather private, and they may have a higher-than-average interest in death, sex, the "occult", or the materialist meaning of the 8th house as "shared resources". For example, I saw one really interesting post once by an 8th house sun nurse who worked with hospice patients.

I do think people tend to shape their reality around their thinking, but I don't think there is anything magical about this. For example, when I was growing up I had very low self-confidence in social situations. Well, people like that tend to put off other people who might otherwise find them to be just fine; and a vicious cycle ensues. I sensed that new people didn't warm up to me, so my self-confidence dropped further. So thoughts can create self-fulfilling prophecies.

For sure, jealousy and suspicion in a relationship can create a vicious cycle, because if it persists, ultimately one's partner doesn't feel trusted, or feels she can never just enjoy herself around other people. This would tend to drive a wedge into the relationship and perhaps ultimately drive her away.

It sounds like this girl really does love you, and your synastry looks good. Even if her sun should change house position with a correct birth time, Taurus loves stability, so I don't think she is looking for anybody else.

Looking at the chart,

#1. Some one with Sun trine Jupiter is always good/generous at heart. There placement in 7th and 11th is indicative of good balance between friends and relations.

However
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#2. Sun receives square aspect from Chiron - there are chances of her relationship being broken and painful

#3. Venus receives square aspect from Neptune- there are chances of her being deceived in her relationship.

Outcome
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#4 Over period of time, she will develop coldness and seriousness in her relationship and in married life.

Question
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#5. Who are you? - #2, #3 or facing #4.

waybread said:

I do think people tend to shape their reality around their thinking, but I don't think there is anything magical about this. For example, when I was growing up I had very low self-confidence in social situations. Well, people like that tend to put off other people who might otherwise find them to be just fine; and a vicious cycle ensues. I sensed that new people didn't warm up to me, so my self-confidence dropped further. So thoughts can create self-fulfilling prophecies.

For sure, jealousy and suspicion in a relationship can create a vicious cycle, because if it persists, ultimately one's partner doesn't feel trusted, or feels she can never just enjoy herself around other people. This would tend to drive a wedge into the relationship and perhaps ultimately drive her away.

It sounds like this girl really does love you, and your synastry looks good. Even if her sun should change house position with a correct birth time, Taurus loves stability, so I don't think she is looking for anybody else.

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Hi Waybread!

Hope you had a good a new years, I know it may appear that I am the "Insecure Jelouse type" this isn't the case though, infact I've spent alot of time reassuring her on many many ridiculous jealousy's that shes had over me .

Since this spark of Jealousy has popped up for me, I feel like it has not only strengthened our relationship, but provided her with a boost of independence and security in that area, its kinda like my Vulnerability has reassured her. / Something that my past or present struggled to do / IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!

And ultimately this is good, Because I've always being the secure more dominant one in the relationship. Now I feel like were abit more equal, and I feel more challenged, which for me makes the relationship alot more interesting and exciting for me.

Without pain the heart is hollow, I really this quote! quite effective for such a small sentence. I'll definitely share this one going forward.

Oh and after all, My chart is hardly Mr Goody two shoes > .. so this is definitely a learning curve, and new step of experience to take in my stride!

ahhhhhhh

dhundhun said:

Looking at the chart,


Question
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#5. Who are you? - #2, #3 or facing #4.

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Thanks for the input, she's a big heart alright!

as regard to question 5.

with much respect, Id prefer to not answer those questions. But thanks again.

Thanks, WA--and all the best to you both for the New Year!

Saying Aries moon tends to cheats is oversimplifying things--Aries is about egoism, but a moon in Aries is driven by egoism. Depending on the chart, that egoism may in fact mean sticking to the security of a stable relationship, where one's ego's a continually reassured and protected. Just an example of how in astrology, context is everything.

And speaking of Aries and context: in the chart you posted, Venus is in Aries (venus' detriment), ruling a Libra ASC, ruled by 5th house Mars in Pisces and in opposition to ASC. This combination might, in my experience, point to someone capable of cheating. Venus placement, afflictions, dispositor (the plant that rules the sign another planet is in) and other aspects, especially in relation to the ASC seems to factor in significantly with cheating/not cheating in romantic and sexual relationships.

Breaking this down:

Venus in this chart s stressed by being in Aries. It is also in opposition of ASC, which is significant, but it's even more so because Venus rules Libra, and thus rules the ASC in this cahrt. Typically Venus opp. ASC is said to give the native grace and ease in social situations, allowing them to make acquaintances easily and effortlessly. This is doubly so when Venus rules the ASC. But when you have the Venus itself in a sign it's not comfortable in, like Aries, making new acquaintances can easily become an outlet for stress in Venusian areas, like romantic relationships. In other words, when Venus get stressed, it looks for the easiest why to relive that stress and that's what it's most talented at in this chart--making new acquaintances. You follow me?

Now, to see what direction such acquaintances might take you need to look at where Aries Venus' dispositor is in this chart. It's a 5th house Mars in Pisces. 5th house--pursuit of romantic relationships, playful sex, flirting, activities that enliven one's sense of self (like getting attention from others). Mars in Pisces--escapist, prone to being misled or carried off by their emotion, difficulties seeing emotional boundaries due to psychological blindspots, confusion about their desires.

Yeah, so I think you can probably get the pic here: I would say this is a person who, given her strong native talent for striking up new acquaintances with ease, might turn to pursuing a romantic relationship (or just flirting that goes too far) with someone outside an already existing romantic relationship as an outlet for stress stemming from said existing relationship, and may do this out of emotional blindness or confusion resulting from an inability to recognize her own desires or awareness of when she's crossed the line. This seems like the kind of person who'd cheat and then say to their partner "I didn't mean it to go that far--it just 'happened.'"

But it all stems from that Aries Venus not coping well the normal, typical stresses of being in an ongoing relationship, no matter how much she may think she's in love. Every relationship has moments where it seems boring, or the two people seem to be on different frequencies or someone's needs are not being communicated well, and so on. And Aries Venus, due to its Arian egoism that makes it a lot less introspective than other Venus placements, isn't good at being patient with that stress and prefers to seek out ego-reassuring ways to relieve that stress. And unless the native is very aware of themselves and their Venusian patterns, Venus will follow the path set out by aspects and dispositors in the native chart.

If this was an older person, I'd say she might be better aware of her Venusian self and keep herself in check, but judging by her age and what you've said, it sounds like she has a lot of growing up to do in this area. Sorry.

WackyAquarius said:

Hi Folks,

Okay, something has being draining my brain resources for the past few days, eating away at me, and well partly because of an observation of body language and impulsive flirty statements that my partner made at a Christmas party at my mates house the other night.

She was getting close, a bit too close for body space to my friends younger brother,, maybe it was to gain attention from this person. maybe to be liked by this person? Maybe there was no sexual intent behind it? Yes, she could of being socializing, but in my opinion it’s just not necessary to get that close to someone unless you want to flirt with them in some way.

Whether she's conscious of that?, I'm not too sure, Or maybe her mars in Pisces which is in the fifth house lead her to assume that her movements were deceptive, and that I would not pick up on it?

I've searched the web for signs of Cheating in the Natal Chat, And well I couldn’t find a lot of info on aspects that reveal signs of it, more so on natal planet sign for example Moon in Aries / Venus in Aries.

Apparently Moon in Aries is more likely to cheat?, haven’t said that my best mate is an Moon in Aries and he's never cheated in his life.

What I've found seems to point towards Aries, and well as you can see from the attached chart my partner has Mercury and Venus in Aries.

Funny enough, there’s a girl that I work with who is extremely flirtatious. She has a boyfriend, and is quite suggestive in that area with few of the lads in work. Very flirty, I've thought about before when I first got with my partner over a year ago! However her possessive almost obsessive nature turned me off that idea.

I've always Thought Mars in Gemini likes to play around! however any of the info I’ve found on the web seems to point towards Aries. her Venus is in Aries? which one sentence it says it is an extremely honest and trustworthy,

But then it goes on to another sentence to say that they pursue a love interest ardently, and in extreme cases, this zeal leads them into fly-by-night marriages? Not to mention a lot of the fifth house mars stuff which talks about how they like the excitement of love affairs.

Although we are very much in love, Something tells me that there may be more that meets the eye, Maybe a need for security, compliments for esteem boost, My question and more so my concern is will this end up in her being flattered into drunken one night stand that leads to some sort of secret affair?


To be honest I think it was astrology that really brought this observation to my attention, although her behaviour at the party did seem strange and flirty, on the other hand she was drunk and she could of just being overly friendly and not comfortable in the envorinment. Venus in Aries, Libra Rising, and Mars in the fifth house in Pisces really has me baffled, and I really just need closure on it.

Thanks a mill Folks
Jd,

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To be fair when we are drunk we do act in a more uninhibited way. The barriers are down. Aries is not so much the flirtatious influence. That belongs to the air signs especially Libra.....Aries is sexual and will go after what they want and likes the conquest.

You dont know who has cheated and who hasnt really.....This cant be seen just by a natal chart alone.... Cant really get closure on just citing a few aspects that belong to someone else. Sorry.

If there is no trust in the relationship then I would suggest you have real problems anyway.

WackyAquarius said:

Hi Folks,

Okay, something has being draining my brain resources for the past few days, eating away at me, and well partly because of an observation of body language and impulsive flirty statements that my partner made at a Christmas party at my mates house the other night.

She was getting close, a bit too close for body space to my friends younger brother,, maybe it was to gain attention from this person. maybe to be liked by this person? Maybe there was no sexual intent behind it? Yes, she could of being socializing, but in my opinion it’s just not necessary to get that close to someone unless you want to flirt with them in some way.

Whether she's conscious of that?, I'm not too sure, Or maybe her mars in Pisces which is in the fifth house lead her to assume that her movements were deceptive, and that I would not pick up on it?

I've searched the web for signs of Cheating in the Natal Chat, And well I couldn’t find a lot of info on aspects that reveal signs of it, more so on natal planet sign for example Moon in Aries / Venus in Aries.

Apparently Moon in Aries is more likely to cheat?, haven’t said that my best mate is an Moon in Aries and he's never cheated in his life.

What I've found seems to point towards Aries, and well as you can see from the attached chart my partner has Mercury and Venus in Aries.

Funny enough, there’s a girl that I work with who is extremely flirtatious. She has a boyfriend, and is quite suggestive in that area with few of the lads in work. Very flirty, I've thought about before when I first got with my partner over a year ago! However her possessive almost obsessive nature turned me off that idea.

I've always Thought Mars in Gemini likes to play around! however any of the info I’ve found on the web seems to point towards Aries. her Venus is in Aries? which one sentence it says it is an extremely honest and trustworthy,

But then it goes on to another sentence to say that they pursue a love interest ardently, and in extreme cases, this zeal leads them into fly-by-night marriages? Not to mention a lot of the fifth house mars stuff which talks about how they like the excitement of love affairs.

Although we are very much in love, Something tells me that there may be more that meets the eye, Maybe a need for security, compliments for esteem boost, My question and more so my concern is will this end up in her being flattered into drunken one night stand that leads to some sort of secret affair?


To be honest I think it was astrology that really brought this observation to my attention, although her behaviour at the party did seem strange and flirty, on the other hand she was drunk and she could of just being overly friendly and not comfortable in the envorinment. Venus in Aries, Libra Rising, and Mars in the fifth house in Pisces really has me baffled, and I really just need closure on it.

Thanks a mill Folks
Jd,

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Hi WackyAquarious,
Well here is my two cents worth and I have been studying astrology many years. Let me put your mind to rest, I am Aries rising, I have Venus in Sag square Uranus, Mars in the 5th(actually on the 6th cusp and sometime in the 6th house depending on the software) and Venus and Neptune in the 8th house with Venus ruling my 7th house. I am not a cheater, however I have attracted erratic and unstable relationships my entire life. Fast beginnings and abrupt endings would characterize my relationships. Men who were unreliable and has other women on the side, definitely. I guess the point I am making is that this aspect Venus square Uranus can attract that kind of partner, understand? Venus square Uranus isn't always about cheating but can be someone who is attracted to men who aren't available. Now Venus doesn't rule her 7th house of partnerships, so that's helpful there. The other thing is the Venus square Uranus can make one like a certain amount of freedom in their relationships. Now given that you have Aquarius Sun and Gemini Moon, I would say that works perfectly fine for you even with Cancer on your ASC. I have found personally that the combination of Aries and Pisces personal planets makes for some of the most unreliable people to be in relationships with. Aries is a ground breaker and like to conquer and move on and has a low boredom threshold, Pisces romantic and in love with love, they are also wishy washy and constantly changes their minds. Not a good combination for long-term success in relationships. Not saying a mature and highly evolved person cannot overcome this, but it's still difficult. With Venus square Neptune, there could be an element of rose colored glasses as others have mentioned, and again deception both given or received. She might be lacking a bit in confidence with that Moon conjunct Saturn in her 4th house or possibly have a little bit of depression from time to time. Maybe the flirting was just a confidence booster. With Saturn there in the 4th, one of her parents was probably pretty austere or cold to her, maybe not very interested.
Give her the benefit of the doubt and don't sweat the small stuff. If it becomes a regular thing, then sit down and talk to her about it. Jealousy is a wasted emotion, remember that.

Lunar Pisces said:

Saying Aries moon tends to cheats is oversimplifying things--Aries is about egoism, but a moon in Aries is driven by egoism. Depending on the chart, that egoism may in fact mean sticking to the security of a stable relationship, where one's ego's a continually reassured and protected. Just an example of how in astrology, context is everything.

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Lunar Pisces,

Thanks for all the information. You really opened my mind on the whole Venus/ASC aspect.

I never really looked at it that way, something I must remember when attempting to interpret horoscopes. (Where is Sign) / (Where is Ruling planet)

However, I was reading the "10 Don't s in Astrology" thread that's poster somewhere on here.. Radu put a very wise statement which is Never use your astrology blindly, but rather seek to use it in a creative way..

Astrology should not stop you from going through different life experiences, but rather be your guide to explore and understand what's going on. Such as refusing to go out with someone just because you saw some squares or oppositions in your synastry or like refusing to do something just because difficulties are foreseeable in the astrology chart. That is bad astrology! All astrology aspects can be used in a creative positive way (especially true for your soul).
Astrology is a complementary way to improve what you're already doing, not to replace what you're doing. Astrology is not spiritual by itself, but it can help you if you're already on the spiritual path.

No relationship is perfect, what occured that night at the party caught me by surprise, However I have come to the understanding that life is life, and love is love. And Whatever happens happens.

Other then *Ego Conflicts" which someone mentioned in an early post, our relationship is quite amazing! We love each other, were committed, and whatever happens.. simply happens! And I've learned to accept this, and will continue to through out the relationship

So on that Note, I hope people can learn something from this thread!

Instead of over analysing your partners chart and polluting a good relationship with negative thoughts and emotions just accept them and love them until you actually have a viable reason not to.

Other wise you could be destroying a potentially good relationship based on your own curiosity with the assistance of predictive psychology and astrology.

If its working, - Its working, If it's not - Find another path that does work!

What started as a jealous insecurity - and fear of loss, has become a lesson of security, and strength.

And well, I can Only Thank Astrology, Life, all the people that submitted to this thread,and my girlfriend for this experience that has ultimately thought me a valuable lesson!

all the best,

- Wacky

Vista said:

Hi WackyAquarious,
Jealousy is a wasted emotion, remember that.

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Absolutely Vista,

I also like the quote, A show of Jealousy is an insult to oneself!

also the above post is relevant to your initial response as well,

Thanks again partner

- Wack

i have to agree 100% with claire
the venus square neptune/uranus is an aspect of sexual liberation and deception.
i think your intuitive thoughts about body language etc are correct.
rahu

Hi WackyAQ,

My 2 cents, even if things seem to have moved on. A mix of astrology and psychology.

I think she would be rather fixed in her attachments(sun,moon conjunct saturn), even if she would like a bit of outside attention(venus,rising).
Be ready to stand on your aquarian pedestal the moment her mars starts to need a creative expression, and her venus and rising start to make her a social animal. neptune conjunct uranus could be a sign of a visionary genius and her creative expression is certainly going to be original and unique as she is. Give her space and keep your insecurity and fears (manifested as jealousness) in check.
An 8th house sun and 12H jupiter make me think of intuitive faculties, desire for growth, maybe even growth far away from others(12H). Definitely give her space to change and transform.
This butterfly should not be limited by possessiveness in a relationship. Give her freedom and the moment she chooses you you will know that her heart is yours. But "give" is the keyword. And give her the chance to do that choice on a daily basis

Shouldn't be an issue for you with your aquarian traits and pisces sensitivity(venus), if you yourself look for personal growth that would make you fulfill the good promise of your chart.

Good luck;-)

I'm a Cancer who has the misfortune of having both Venus and Mars in Gemini because I was born in 1996. The descriptions of Venus in Gemini scare me, but I've found some possible offsetting factors. My ASC is Sagittarius which means my DSC is also Gemini.

Venus in Gemini but in a house ruled by an earth sign (6th), ruler of Venus sign in Cancer (Mercury 2.17 degrees Cancer), Venus in aspect to Saturn (11.48 degrees Gemini to 7.12 degrees Aries), Venus Opposition Ascendant / Conjunct Descendant.

Ruler of 7th house in 7th, but in Cancer.

Moon Trine Venus.

Do you think the factors I've listed are more than enough to dampen / completely overrule the influence of a Gemini Venus, making it more like Cancer / Virgo / Capricorn Venus?


My Sun, Mercury, and Jupiter all square Saturn.

Despite having Venus in Gemini, I have never been involved with a Gemini nor had a period of sustained attraction to one (except one crush). From the descriptions of the ideal woman for a Gemini Venus / Gemini DSC, I don't think they completely match what I prefer.

Gemini Venus / DSC is attracted to witty and intelligent women. I think I am, not necessarily witty, but someone I can talk to and bond on an intellectual level. However, once you get to my deeper needs, they tell quite a different story. Intellectual compatibility is far from the be-all-end-all, what matter a lot more is emotional compatibility and shared values.

If you want to have good conversations with me and bond at a purely intellectual level but I know you have vastly different values from me, things won't go far. What I'm really looking for is someone who can give me maturity, stability, and a sense of security by looking after me. I need to feel safe more than I need to feel stimulated. I guess that's the influence of 6th house Venus, Cancer, and Saturn / Capricorn?

I can have very good conversations with a girl, but if I find out she's a party animal and someone who's non-committal, I'll back away no matter how hard it might be for me. I also find myself attracted to and attracting people who are older than me either in age, in soul, or both. I can't say I've ever been involved with anyone who's 'younger' in any kind of relationship.

I also disagree that I'm a witty and charming individual as Venus in Gemini suggests. Making a few jokes isn't being witty, the way I show my love for someone isn't through words (unless written, and after thought), but through actions.

Scorpio Pluto is a high power placement, but her ascendant is Libra (Air), they usually like to flirt with everyone and like being chased around like the wind. Not necessarily anything bad.
Aquarius Moon and Aquarius Saturn already tells you that she’s got unconventional beliefs about sex and relationships, revolutionist, no restrictions, and breaking out of the conventional world.
Pisces Mars is known not to have any barriers and usually dissolving walls, but depends on the person how they do that.
Aries Mercury (fluids), Aries is always fast, furious, and loves the hunt and chase. Fire, impulsive, and Aries is what she attracts in men in one aspect. Venus in Aries (What she loves, passion).
Taurus Sun is sensuality, sexuality, and Taurus is fertility, just on the Taurus/Scorpio axis is a lot of sexual energy.
Leo Chiron, and she has a bit of Leo, passion and fire. Playfulness.
Usually the Leo, Aquarius, Taurus, Scorpio (Fixed Signs) is the feminine sexual energy.
The Cardinal energies are more masculine. Aries, Capricorn, Libra, Cancer.
Sagittarius, Pisces, Gemini, and Virgo are mutable, and go both ways.

Have not read all the responses. To the OP: are you engaged? Have you discussed marriage or are you just dating? Do you live together?
LIN