Looking for answers

AquaAqua

Well-known member
Hey all

I am posting the synastry (I am on the inside) and composite chart of myself and a lady i met sometime earlier. I am looking to understand what is going on here...

As of now we have an uneasy calm, with neither of us contacting each other.

Few points

- I first met her at a party/social gathering on sept 12th 2015. it was for a very brief moment and i instantly connected with her. It went like this - I was walking from one end to another and i saw her eyes and i instantly blurted ' oh my god, you are so messed up!'
My progressed moon was conjunct my lilith by 1 degree that day.

- We met again on the 18th and after spending a few days together did not contact each tother for a few weeks till she contacted me on the night of 14th Oct. On that day transiting saturn was exactly conjunct her vertex and transiting Sun was exactly conjunct mine.

We have significant lilith, node, vertex contacts. Thanks
 

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muchacho

Well-known member
Hey all

I am posting the synastry (I am on the inside) and composite chart of myself and a lady i met sometime earlier. I am looking to understand what is going on here...

As of now we have an uneasy calm, with neither of us contacting each other.

Few points

- I first met her at a party/social gathering on sept 12th 2015. it was for a very brief moment and i instantly connected with her. It went like this - I was walking from one end to another and i saw her eyes and i instantly blurted ' oh my god, you are so messed up!'
My progressed moon was conjunct my lilith by 1 degree that day.

- We met again on the 18th and after spending a few days together did not contact each tother for a few weeks till she contacted me on the night of 14th Oct. On that day transiting saturn was exactly conjunct her vertex and transiting Sun was exactly conjunct mine.

We have significant lilith, node, vertex contacts. Thanks
Yeah, both Moons in earth signs, both Suns in air signs and ASC in water and earth signs. That's very harmonic.
 

dowhanawi

Well-known member
This synestry has a lot of negative aspect's, the few trines &sextile are more to her favor. Your sun is in her 8th, but your 8th is sag and she doesn't have much there, just Neptune. It's telling that it is her 5th house. Your first understanding if her is on this level, once you really get to know her you might see more from the many squares. If in the long term you still want this, you'll need good communication and she will have to want to fill your needs on a conscious level.

Couples without great synestry can choose to make it work. It takes effort and understanding. You have more of those qualities, so it might leave you doing all the work, especially if the relationship seems easier to her then you.
 
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AquaAqua

Well-known member
Thank you muchacho and dowhanawi.

I sort of agree with you dowhanawi. It was me who broke of the contact between us. Call it instinct or 'gut feel' but i just knew i had to be cautious around her or it can distract or sap me.

I did my best to spell out my needs to her and as you rightly pointed out she will have to conciously choose to fulfil them if she wants this. Thank you!

Also any thoughts on the composite?
 

dowhanawi

Well-known member
Just, being in such a relationship myself, but even more unbalanced (I would be his ideal match, on my side lies only great, near fatal attraction
...it is VERY draining. Will it last? That's up to me. I refuse to check a synestry chart but I know both our Natal's well enough to realize much of what it would say. Look after your heart!
 

dowhanawi

Well-known member
I was busy, but have some time now. The composite chart reinforces the issues. First house is gem with no planets. It is opposed the sun which is the sun of the relationship. Gem & Sag get along better them other opposing signs, they intrigue each other. But again I think this is shows the same issue. Sag and gem (ac and sun of this relationship) aren't exactly awesome relationship signs. They can both up and walk away unattached. The chart is full from 3rd to 6th. I think it's telling that it is empty from 7 onward except Jupiter in 8. Again I think this refers to the pressure on you to make the relationship grow as the other person has it all going smoothly for them. 6 us health and jobs (not career) and your emotional health would take a beating as you'll be doing the work in this relationship. Look at the 5 planets there + Venus on the cusp. Relationships take work....but that much work? In the areas of self-sun (or in this case the relationship), emotions, communication, dreams...get the drift? Venus, Uranus and moon are all square mars. Venus is sextile Saturn. That's a positive aspect but not strong. Again I think it tells us she seems great at first but not long term.

On a personal note, I am in a relationship like this and I don't recommend it. But if you choose this, at least you are aware now and can see if you can shift it to more balance now. Take it slow so you have time to get out should you later choose to do so.
 

AquaAqua

Well-known member
Thanks you again. I have incredible intuition. Though I often choose to ignore it, which I regret later. During the entire 6 weeks or so we were 'seeing' each other I was very very bare bones. Right off the bat I 'knew' there was nothing here except some karmic agenda. I literally walked out after we got physical the first time as something in me told, 'Go'. I am no longer in contact with her and have absolutely no intention of getting back in touch until she sorta herself out. Even then it's gonna be a long time till I give someone my trust.

Few interesting points:

- she is 7 years older
- alcoholic. Though u can see she drinks to dull her pain/sense
- Her Eros is Sagitarius house 5. Mine is Gemini house 1
- her psyche is Gemini house 11 and mine Virgo house 5.
- no aspects with each other though.
 

AquaAqua

Well-known member
I do agree with the draining part. Why don't you quit..? Even better, leave it in a self serving ambiguous state. Some people need to be taught a lesson! :)
 

dowhanawi

Well-known member
Alcoholics always drink to dull their pain, the rest of us deal with it.

Why don't I leave? I'm better at giving advice lol. K, I'll be serious. I did make hard choices. My husband no longer lives at home although we are still together. He too is an alcoholic. He is in recovery, aa etc. To move home I need him to get therapy for his issues cuz the kids and I need a greater commitment then one day at a time recovery and its his issues that cuz the problems and the drinking (also a problem). And I don't plan on waiting for him to make that choice forever. For my part I am taking charge of my weaknesses. I wish I had done this much sooner. And working ony weaknesses is proving to be very rewarding and will result in a better relationship in the future (with or without him).
 

dowhanawi

Well-known member
I'm 8 yrs older. I'm always the older one lol, it means nothing. If Peter Pan was real, he would have my chart lol, so it works. Really guys just have no idea how old I am till they ask. Her Eros likes your psyche. Gem's & Sags are the only opposing signs that really enjoy each other. But that's attraction not a relationship.

Alcoholics don't know how to love cuz they don't love themselves. That is why you would do all the work. Sobriety won't fix that. Therapy might. I didn't realize he was an alcoholic for a long time. I was in deep by the time I figured it out/he stopped hidding it
 

AquaAqua

Well-known member
Although I am an amateur if you don't mind I would like to see your synastry and natal dowhanavi
 
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dowhanawi

Well-known member
I haven't gotten a clear response on how to upload my chart from a phone (I don't own a computer. I could email it if you want to put email in the PM's. As for synestry, I refuse to look at it lol, put could include his natal if you want to compare that to hers.
 
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