Why did he ghost me?

S

scahm

Well-known member
Hi everyone,

I've cast horaries and asked for your opinion on this guy (who I got intimate with, only to have him ghost) before, though I've realised that the worthwhile thing would've been to ask why he ghosted me, instead of asking whether he'd come back. I guess it's all just part of the healing process, though now I ask more out of curiosity.

It's been a while since he ghosted me, so I'm skeptical whether this horary will actually reveal anything. Does this mean we look at separating aspects to figure out his frame of mind instead?

His second significator, Sun, being in his own house probably reflects his own self interest, though I'm not sure what his main significator being in his second house would indicate. As far as I'm aware, money was certainly not an issue in our relationship. Venus/Mars trine in the past indicating that he did actually like me?
 

Attachments

  • Screenshot 2020-04-25 at 20.08.35.jpg
    Screenshot 2020-04-25 at 20.08.35.jpg
    59.5 KB · Views: 70
  • Screenshot 2020-04-25 at 20.08.53.png
    Screenshot 2020-04-25 at 20.08.53.png
    66.8 KB · Views: 35
Chrysalis

Chrysalis

Well-known member
Can you give a little background first, as in how long you were dating him, how serious was it, and how you met etc? This will help to pinpoint in the chart the reason for him ghosting you.
 
S

scahm

Well-known member
Chrysalis said:
Can you give a little background first, as in how long you were dating him, how serious was it, and how you met etc? This will help to pinpoint in the chart the reason for him ghosting you.
Click to expand...

Sorry yes, of course. We met on a dating app and had been speaking constantly for three months before we actually met (which is when he ghosted). It took us a while to finally meet as we had been long distance (I was supposed to move to the same city as him before lockdown occurred). It sounds silly now, but we had built up a connection virtually, and it had seemed that we would start actually dating once we met.

I would assume that he just wasn't that into me when we finally met, but he was so loving and affectionate at the time, that I'm unsure. When I confronted him about ghosting, he claims distance was the reason, but I'm not sure I believe him.
 
Last edited:
Chrysalis

Chrysalis

Well-known member
Having an intercepted 2nd/8th axis shows your self worth being affected by this. Moon ruling the 9th having left a trine with Saturn in his 9th does also probably show long-distance restrictions.

Now him venus is in the intercepted 2nd house, interceptions being about blockages and obstructions. So could it be that he's ghosted you because he felt like you deserved better? Maybe getting to know you previously and on the date, he did like you but knew he couldn't give you what you truly wanted so didn't want to lead you on.

When you met did you get intimate with him or was it just to meet for a drink etc?
 
S

scahm

Well-known member
Chrysalis said:
Having an intercepted 2nd/8th axis shows your self worth being affected by this. Moon ruling the 9th having left a trine with Saturn in his 9th does also probably show long-distance restrictions.

Now him venus is in the intercepted 2nd house, interceptions being about blockages and obstructions. So could it be that he's ghosted you because he felt like you deserved better? Maybe getting to know you previously and on the date, he did like you but knew he couldn't give you what you truly wanted so didn't want to lead you on.

When you met did you get intimate with him or was it just to meet for a drink etc?
Click to expand...

Thanks for your insight, as always, Chrysalis - you're right about my self worth being affected by this, but thankfully, I feel like it's slowly on the mend. I've seen him back on the dating app since he ghosted, so it's clear that he's looking to meet other people. Interesting to note the long-distance issue though - the irony is that he ghosted me just before lockdown, so it's not like he could see me, or anyone else for that matter, regardless!

I can potentially see him not wanting to lead me on - he had stated that he was in a 'go with the flow' mindset in regards to dating, though he had also spoken about seeking intimacy instead of something casual, hence my confusion.

We had met for dinner and drinks, which led to us getting intimate later that night.
 
Last edited:
Chrysalis

Chrysalis

Well-known member
scahm said:
Thanks for your insight, as always, Chrysalis - you're right about my self worth being affected by this, but thankfully, I feel like it's slowly on the mend. I've seen him back on the dating app since he ghosted, so it's clear that he's looking to meet other people. Interesting to note the long-distance issue though - the irony is that he ghosted me just before lockdown, so it's not like he could see me, or anyone else for that matter, regardless!

I can potentially see him not wanting to lead me on - he had stated that he was in a 'go with the flow' mindset in regards to dating, though he had also spoken about seeking intimacy instead of something casual, hence my confusion.

We had met for dinner and drinks, which led to us getting intimate later that night.
Click to expand...

Yes, it does seem like maybe you had given some kind of vibe or impression that you wanted more, and not just a hook up with someone. He's met with you that one time, but he deep down knows he doesn't want anything serious with you (or maybe anyone right now), so he's had to then do the ghosting afterward...which is the cowards way out really, but still.

Its not good what he's done but at least you've not been strung along for months on end to just be used and then dumped after.
 
S

scahm

Well-known member
Chrysalis said:
Yes, it does seem like maybe you had given some kind of vibe or impression that you wanted more, and not just a hook up with someone. He's met with you that one time, but he deep down knows he doesn't want anything serious with you (or maybe anyone right now), so he's had to then do the ghosting afterward...which is the cowards way out really, but still.

Its not good what he's done but at least you've not been strung along for months on end to just be used and then dumped after.
Click to expand...

I agree, thanks Chrysalis. For learning's sake, could you please explain how you saw that I wanted something more in the chart? I suppose him being Venus in Gemini probably indicates he wants to casually date around, right?
 
Chrysalis

Chrysalis

Well-known member
scahm said:
I agree, thanks Chrysalis. For learning's sake, could you please explain how you saw that I wanted something more in the chart? I suppose him being Venus in Gemini probably indicates he wants to casually date around, right?
Click to expand...

Your conjunct the 4th house cusp, so even though you're in Aquarius 4th house is about being settled and setting up something long term.

Yes, him being in Gemini did add to what I've said.

These things do happen, especially now we are in the dating app age, you can leave one person and find another within the next hour, its nothing these days, it's sad really, it's all too easy.
 
S

scahm

Well-known member
Chrysalis said:
Your conjunct the 4th house cusp, so even though you're in Aquarius 4th house is about being settled and setting up something long term.

Yes, him being in Gemini did add to what I've said.

These things do happen, especially now we are in the dating app age, you can leave one person and find another within the next hour, its nothing these days, it's sad really, it's all too easy.
Click to expand...

I see! Yes, you're right, I had really liked him and had hoped for it to lead to something long term. And it's true, people have become so disposable these days with apps, it's very sad indeed.

Thanks again for your responses Chrysalis, you've always provided me with such helpful insight!
 
L

LynnLicata

New member
Chrysalis said:
Having an intercepted 2nd/8th axis shows your self worth being affected by this. Moon ruling the 9th having left a trine with Saturn in his 9th does also probably show long-distance restrictions.

Now him venus is in the intercepted 2nd house, interceptions being about blockages and obstructions. So could it be that he's ghosted you because he felt like you deserved better? Maybe getting to know you previously and on the date, he did like you but knew he couldn't give you what you truly wanted so didn't want to lead you on.

When you met did you get intimate with him or was it just to meet for a drink etc?
Click to expand...
Looking at the chart with the Sun/Uranus conjunction at the 7th house cusp it is obvious that this would be only a brief affair. It indicates he is freedom oriented and has a very cavalier attitude toward sexual intimacy. Fairly typical with Gemini.
 
S

scahm

Well-known member
LynnLicata said:
Looking at the chart with the Sun/Uranus conjunction at the 7th house cusp it is obvious that this would be only a brief affair. It indicates he is freedom oriented and has a very cavalier attitude toward sexual intimacy. Fairly typical with Gemini.
Click to expand...

Thanks LynnLicata - that makes a lot of sense, though he was so affectionate towards me that it was hard to believe that to be the case at the time. The upcoming square between Venus/Neptune is also quite concerning, probably that he'll go on to deceive me/others maybe?
 
Chrysalis

Chrysalis

Well-known member
I like it how three astrologers on here have replied to your post with different views on the chart, but giving the same kind of outcome.

I can see also both Tiks and Lynn's analysis.
 
S

scahm

Well-known member
Chrysalis said:
I like it how three astrologers on here have replied to your post with different views on the chart, but giving the same kind of outcome.

I can see also both Tiks and Lynn's analysis.
Click to expand...

Yes, me too, definitely more revealing than I thought it'd be.
 
Top