HELP! :( My sister JUST got married and now wants to split already!

shaeri

Well-known member
Hello fellow astrologers! As you can already tell from the subject, my sister was recently wed, as of June 14th 2019, to her long time (~9+ years) boyfriend. On Sunday, July 7th 2019, she dropped a bomb on my parents and myself (her older sister), and basically said she wants out of this marriage already?!?! She basically told her husband that she "fell out of love" with him a long time ago, but was just going through the motions of getting married and having a wedding because she felt that that was just the natural next step, and didn't realize that she was unhappy in the relationship. Her husband of course was extremely distraught as this came out of left field, and came to my parents and myself and my husband, and was literally crying because he didn't know what to do. We all felt and still feel so bad for him as he is a great guy and we had all accepted him into our family many years ago. We all suspected that maybe she had met someone else, because of how strange this all was, but according to her, there isn't anyone else, unless someone can see from her chart that there might be?!

I have gotten some insight from an astrologer I know, but she wasn't as thorough as I wished she was, and so I have come here to find some answers. I can only chalk this up to some kind of Saturn Return life crisis because it was just so unexpected and irrational. She says that she has been "depressed" for a long time, but was just hiding it from all of us, which, if I'm being honest, her having a Capricorn Moon, makes me think she is just taking her feelings way too seriously. As far as we can all see, she acts totally normal.

I have uploaded both of their charts in hopes that some of you can help me understand what the deal is. My sister's is the Pisces Sun, and her husband is the Virgo Sun. We, her family, have all rallied together to save this marriage. Do you think this is a short term thing that will blow over, or do you think they probably won't work out? Thank you!!! :smile:
 

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watcherofthesouth

Well-known member
We, her family, have all rallied together to save this marriage. Do you think this is a short term thing that will blow over, or do you think they probably won't work out? Thank you!!! :smile:[/QUOTE]
I'm so sorry to hear - it must be awful for everyone. She is experiencing Sade Sati, Saturn riding her ASC and she is about to have a Saturn Return. It's essentially an emotional and psychological earthquake. She is depressed due to this transit most likely. Detachment is very common as well as the desire to leave what you no longer think you want. Divorce is also very common. All I can say is to stay supportive and understanding. Therapy would be a good idea as well as Saturn remedies. I noticed that URA is plowing thru his 7th house and that is extremely difficult too (lots of ups and downs for years with relationships) and it will prob continue for him no matter who he is with until URA leaves the 7th.
 

shaeri

Well-known member
Thank you watcherofthesouth! I really appreciate your insight on this! I googled Sade Sati, but if you can elaborate on this, that would be great. So she's not in her Saturn Return yet? She does seem very detached from all of us (our parents, and me) lately. She said she hasn't been sleeping well because she can't stop thinking about everything, and because she is "depressed". She is currently going to a therapist, and they are also going to couples counseling, but her attitude is basically like she's over everything and over him. We all just can't understand it because she's been with him for 9+ years, and now AFTER she marries him (ceremony, people flew in from all over) she realizes she's unhappy??! I understand that we have to be supportive and understanding, but it's just so sudden and hard to understand! What are Saturn remedies? So you looked up their transits as well? Interesting about Uranus in her husband's chart.
 

ashriia

Well-known member
Hi.
If your sister tells you she is depressed believe her!! Just because she seems fine doesnt mean that she is. She had an solar eclipse that effected her 7th house on july 2nd and since the moon ruler of her 7th is in her 1st house this was a very potent eclipse for her involving her relationships and also herself. Saturn and pluto are also transiting her 1st house. So yes, major life changes and the energy can be very heavy. If she has decided to end her marriage support her. Thats her decision to make. With her cap moon conjunct lilith in the 1st, the more support and understanding she receives during this time the better. I would be worried about her how she is doing. Not her marriage. Not her husband. This is your sister, be there for her and support her descision. By the time pluto and saturn exit her 1st she will be like a new person and it is in her destiny for this to be happening now. Its time for Complete overhaul and transformation.

Her husband as the other astrologer mentioned has transiting uranus in his 7th. That is a divorce transit also. Makes relationships unstable or brings an end to one.

The eclipses were also significant for him being angular on the mc/ic axis.
 

watcherofthesouth

Well-known member
Shaeri, she has not had her Saturn Return yet but she is in full Sade Sati/Shani Sade. One thing that is helpful is to remind her that this is temporary. It's a test of your patience and resilience. It's a time when awful things happen and you just have to deal with them and pray. A very similar situation happened to me (I was in a great marriage) and the next thing I knew I was moving to an isolated place (across from a senior home in the wilderness aka Saturn places), divorcing, girlfriends died, grandmother passed, i traveled to strange places (another result of Sade Sati) and kept losing jobs. That's when I started trying to figure out why this was happening and began a blog to show people how Sade Sati affects others. I'll send u more info.

Here is a quote I have on my site from this website: In one of the tales of Saturn, Saturn approached Lord Hanuman and told him his Sade Sati (seven-and-a-half-years of misery) was about to begin. Hanuman asked, "Which part of my body do you intend to inhabit?"

Saturn replied, "I will be sitting on your head."

Your sister has probably another 2 years of this to go (that hardest part of the transit)

If there's one bright spot - Capricorn Moons (since Caps are ruled by Saturn) may have less problems which, I'm sure, is hard to believe based on what has happened so far.
 
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Your sister really never wanted a marriage in her heart of hearts,(venus in aquarius) though she needed one (moon in cap). She may have thought she wanted to marry, society tells us so.
Venus and Mars in Aquarius does not a peaceful mate make. Unless there's a lot of mutual Aquarius/Libra energy.
Uranus transiting his natal 7th tells me he is karmically due for an Aquarian relationship. Bingo. I've seen people get married during this aspect. Never seen it last.
Though his Pluto squaring her Mars, control her (or try to) behavior?
Let it be, Let it be. let it be, let it be. There will be an answer...
 

shaeri

Well-known member
Watcherofthesouth: Sorry for the delayed response. Thank you for your insights. I have researched Sade Sati more, and am very interested. My moon is in Aquarius, so I guess mine is coming up? I would think that I am currently in my Sade Sati too, since Saturn is in Capricorn, however, when I check those Sade Sati calculators online, it says that I am not yet in Sade Sati? Kind of confused. It does say that my sister is in hers though, so you are correct about that.

I am very sorry to hear of all the things that happened to you during your Sade Sati... that makes me kind of scared for mine!

I am wondering if there is a correlation between Sade Sati in Chinese Astrology? I have posted a thread on the Chinese Astrology forum.
 

ellie04

Well-known member
Your sister could be shaken by the transits and she's hit by several now. Saturn can bring depressed feelings and touching her Asc can majorly affect her. On top of that, tSN and tPluto accompanying. Transit Neptune hovering near her Sun/Juno also causing confusion. In addition, tUranus is in her husband's 7th house now so disruptions on both ends. Usually with such transits, relationships that already have issues will break down. These are long transits so they really need to stake it out.
 
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