hi della122
I can see why you have concerns about understanding your personality as you have many aspects to karmic/psychic /otherworldly influences. so it must seem at times that there are occurrences that are not of your doing.
you have the north node conjunct to pluto and ixion. by house placement this shows you are affected by cultural influences that really are part of social processes beginning before you birth.pluto shows that you are influences by past lives and may be reacting episodes form previous lifes.ixion shows that there are influence of a hostile nature from past family or clan feuding.
Jupiter is square to the vertex. this shows that you put off a strong leader or teacher vibration. this shows friends and others are drawn to you for your opinions. this aspect gives you intelligence in understanding greater social and personal issues and patterns of behavior. you tendt o be just and noble in your morality. this is a good placement for teaching . but again it is as if these qualities are superimposed on your personality from some source besides your own inner workings. because for instance with your mars/Uranus midpoint square your ascendant ,you can be quite radical in your behavior and act on you own sense of morality rather than the social standard of morality .
you have sedan conjunct to Lilith and square to psyche which by themselves show you are a truth seeker at your emotional core. psyche gives a idealistic attachment to following your ideas throughout your life. but nessus is oppose to sedan and Lilith and orcus is square to Lilith and sedan. this shows that your childlike embrace of the truth in all matters has been severely constricted in your childhood. orcus and nessus show a very harsh abusive environment in your childhood that tried to break your noble spirit.
these last 3 patterns are all associated with karma and destiny, so your soul chose to have powerful influences around it in this incarnation.
your venus/mars midpoint is conjunct your sun which shows you are a extremely loving person and likely very attractive to others.but with chiron square to the sun et.al. you are very choosy about intimate friends and boyfriends. you can be too critical of others even though you do mean to seem this way.
eros is conjunct to mercury and opposed to the moon giving you a jokester personality and a very talkative attitude. you express you emotions readily but always with laughter and good will.
venus is trine to your Jupiter giving you physical and social grace. you true look to the bright side of life and draw others to you because of your positive spirit of love and harmony. this tends to be a favorable aspect for love, marriage, educational and financial advancement.
eris is opposed to juno giving you strong sexual urges or libido. this draws many to you put most guys fall in lust and want to marry or control you .with the mercury/orcus midpoint square to Eris and juno , this sudden attraction to you tend to be a turn off as you have a deep mind that is suspicious of sudden traction like these.you also have the Saturn/pluto midpoint opposed to mercury/orcus and square to juno/eris which shows your father has been very restrictive of your social life and doesn't approve of many if any of your boyfriends.
your moon/Saturn midpoint is opposed to the vertex and square to Jupiter so you are a devoted person and expect marriage to be permanent so you don't take sudden infatuation seriously.
as I have said your mars/Uranus midpoint is square your ascendant and your Saturn is square to ceres so you are a person who enjoys your personal freedom and you aren't likely to jump into a committed relationship or marriage where you would have to curtail your freedom .
the Saturn/chiron midpoint is conjunct your sun/ceres midpoint so once again it seems your father has resisted you forming deeper relationships with others and actually seems very possessive, maybe to a fault, of you.
rahu