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  #1  
Unread 10-19-2021, 02:54 PM
Astronizing Astronizing is offline
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Posts: 88
I do not know what and why this is happening. Need advice.

My boyfriend and I were talking about marriage and children. We were having serious engagement discussions. Now, I do not know what is happening. If someone would take a look at the following charts and provide insight not only from an astrological point but also from those who are married/have been married.
Things between my boyfriend and I, it is sad and bizarre. It is as if we were becoming more comfortable at one point but we had a major and horrible fight and....I feel so sad. I do not want to break up at all. I do not think we are but, we are running in circles. We are both very hurt.

One thing I/we realised is that we are both the same in a way? As in, the same things I complain about him are the same things he complains about me. The ways he says I hurt him/make him feel hurt are the same from him towards me. It is as if we are two mirrors but we are not sure of how to find a resolution. And we are finding ourselves in an impasse.

It seems we are both very sensitive and also stubborn. He feels attacked and I also feel attacked.
And, we do not know what to do.

After/during the major fight, I asked if we were still going to get engaged this year and the answer was a negative. Before, I always received positive answers concerning this question.

I am hereby posting our natal charts, progressed charts, synastry, composite and progressed charts.
Couple's therapy is not an option because some ridiculous situation with his health insurance and, we do not have the means to pay out of pocket either.


My natal.


His natal.



Mine Progressed.




His Progressed.




Synastry (I am outside-red).




Composite.



Progressed Composite.



Thank you.

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The Following User Says Thank You to Astronizing For This Useful Post:
ElenaJ (10-22-2021)
  #2  
Unread 10-22-2021, 03:57 PM
ElenaJ ElenaJ is offline
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Re: I do not know what and why this is happening. Need advice.

Thank you for posting the very complete set of well prepared charts.
The two of you do actually mirror each other, your asc/des axis is exactly reversed, so each of you sees your own self and your ideal partner in the other.
You currently have Saturn squaring your important Venus/pluto conjunction. Venus is both your ascendent ruler and your moon ruler, so this is a key planet for you. As a scorpio with both sun and Venus in scorpio, pluto is also a co-ruler of importance. So the Saturn transition is more significant for you than possibly for others.
Transiting Saturn has also been opposing his Venus.
So we also have the major love planet in each of your charts being constricted and dampened.
In addition, the transiting Uranus is hitting the ascendent/des axis that you share, creating havoc. Uranus is sudden, independent and erratic, as well as freedom loving.
This could throw a wrench in the good works of any relationship.
You also have a natal sun/square mars, so mars will be receiving transiting Saturn, putting a lid on your energy and plans.
These are all basically testing energies. They push your button and you have to learn how to react in a positive and healthy way. It is a learning curve.
Looking at the composite we see the beautiful grand trine of sun/moon/jupiter, with the moon/uranus opposition upsetting things.
And in the progressed composite Uranus is again creating difficulties by conjunction with mars, which as you know spells anger, temperament, irritation, fighting.
The basic synastry is not a negative one, but your relationship is going through a phase of testing.
It isn't a time for either engagement or marriage, that can always come later, but rather of learning to respect each other's space and priorities, and commitment.
This is a way of forcing the creation of a solid foundation that will serve you in the future years of an eventual marriage or convivenze.
It isn't easy, and you can't force the issue. It will have to work itself out.

Last edited by ElenaJ; 10-22-2021 at 04:00 PM.
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  #3  
Unread 10-24-2021, 04:02 AM
wan wan is offline
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Re: I do not know what and why this is happening. Need advice.

I will comment on your composite:

Usually I like to see lots of planets in angular houses, which I have heard makes the chart and therefore the relationship strong. Your composite chart isn't very heavily angular, however it has a grand trine, which is often referred to as a "relationship stabilizer". I think it makes up for the fact that there aren't a whole lot of angular activities.
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  #4  
Unread 10-24-2021, 04:08 PM
Astronizing Astronizing is offline
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Re: I do not know what and why this is happening. Need advice.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ElenaJ View Post
Thank you for posting the very complete set of well prepared charts.
Not at all, thank you.

Quote:
You currently have Saturn squaring your important Venus/pluto conjunction. Venus is both your ascendent ruler and your moon ruler, so this is a key planet for you. As a scorpio with both sun and Venus in scorpio, pluto is also a co-ruler of importance. So the Saturn transition is more significant for you than possibly for others.
Correct. I sense I have become more restless about the status quo of our relationship.

Quote:
Transiting Saturn has also been opposing his Venus.
I thought this transit would not start until late January of 2022.

Quote:
In addition, the transiting Uranus is hitting the ascendent/des axis that you share, creating havoc. Uranus is sudden, independent and erratic, as well as freedom loving.
This could throw a wrench in the good works of any relationship.
I thought I was the only one going through a Uranus transit--uranus conjuct asc. For him, I was under the impression uranus will oppose his ascendant and conjunct his desc starting May of next year. Not now.
He will also have uranus square venus starting May of next year. What should I expect?

Correct me if I am wrong but it seems the worst of these transits (uranus ones) will not finalise until June of 2022. I know that my saturn transits will be over by the end of this November.

Quote:
It isn't a time for either engagement or marriage, that can always come later, but rather of learning to respect each other's space and priorities, and commitment.
Yes, that is what it seems like. It is interesting because on one hand, it is as things are becoming more cemented. As in, we are becoming more serious, learning more about one another and comfortable but then, this sudden 'where did this come from' just shows up, like a bomb that comes out of nowhere.

Thank you very much.
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  #5  
Unread 10-24-2021, 04:09 PM
Astronizing Astronizing is offline
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Re: I do not know what and why this is happening. Need advice.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wan View Post
I will comment on your composite:

Usually I like to see lots of planets in angular houses, which I have heard makes the chart and therefore the relationship strong. Your composite chart isn't very heavily angular, however it has a grand trine, which is often referred to as a "relationship stabilizer". I think it makes up for the fact that there aren't a whole lot of angular activities.
Thank you for you interest.
I look forward to your insight.
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