sweetnovember
Member
Here is my chart with transits for today; https://imgur.com/a/XmPfSri
Never in my life have I felt so alone, lost and confused. Can’t shake this feeling of impending doom. I’m beginning to forget who I am & how I ended up here. This started about 3 days ago, I’ve never felt a pain like this before and never felt more ashamed of myself.
This feeling came on a few nights ago as I was trying to fall asleep, I realized how much I deeply hate my life, I was seeing myself in a new light. I have spent the past year building my relationship with myself again, and I thought I had come to love and accept myself fully. It was a blissful feeling while it lasted, but at the turn of a dime, I feel like I have made a complete 180.
I am so dissatisfied with what my life has turned into, a great distaste for my body, my personality, my actions and how I communicate. I’ve grown to hate what I’ve become. Everything about “me” that I have been projecting into the world feels like one big lie. I feel like I’ve never actually shown anybody my true self, it’s always been locked away and hidden. So now, it feels like nobody really knows me. And if nobody truly knows me, I don’t think I even know myself. I don’t know what I’ve become.
These feelings come in cycles, and I can’t explain them with any better words. It just keeps happening in loops. I feel trapped, I want to escape, and I’m terrified that this is what my life will be from now on.
I truly, truly need some guidance right now. I don’t know who to talk to. In my own astrological research months before, I imagined I would be in one of the best eras of my life. From what I see, the transits I am going through should not be making me feel this way.
Sorry for going on so long. I am just so drained.
Never in my life have I felt so alone, lost and confused. Can’t shake this feeling of impending doom. I’m beginning to forget who I am & how I ended up here. This started about 3 days ago, I’ve never felt a pain like this before and never felt more ashamed of myself.
This feeling came on a few nights ago as I was trying to fall asleep, I realized how much I deeply hate my life, I was seeing myself in a new light. I have spent the past year building my relationship with myself again, and I thought I had come to love and accept myself fully. It was a blissful feeling while it lasted, but at the turn of a dime, I feel like I have made a complete 180.
I am so dissatisfied with what my life has turned into, a great distaste for my body, my personality, my actions and how I communicate. I’ve grown to hate what I’ve become. Everything about “me” that I have been projecting into the world feels like one big lie. I feel like I’ve never actually shown anybody my true self, it’s always been locked away and hidden. So now, it feels like nobody really knows me. And if nobody truly knows me, I don’t think I even know myself. I don’t know what I’ve become.
These feelings come in cycles, and I can’t explain them with any better words. It just keeps happening in loops. I feel trapped, I want to escape, and I’m terrified that this is what my life will be from now on.
I truly, truly need some guidance right now. I don’t know who to talk to. In my own astrological research months before, I imagined I would be in one of the best eras of my life. From what I see, the transits I am going through should not be making me feel this way.
Sorry for going on so long. I am just so drained.
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