Katydid, thank you for the links! That was so nice of you.
You are hitting many synchronicities of mine over the past month on the head. I feel a strong reverence for Mars in Capricorn; I think I understand it because my S. Node is Capricorn and my current chart is ruled by Mars. I feel like I know those two energies very well, and get this: I divined through synchronicity, Tarot, and my inner world that it was Mars in Capricorn when it was a month or so ago. You say I may have struggled with romance when I was younger; my romantic life was shaped by an intense unrequited love I had overseas when I was very very young which I obsessed about and pined for as I matured. Venus in Pisces no doubt in effect there as well. As for the Saturn return, I had a relationship with a Leo out of a dream (at first) right at the time of my Saturn return, in fall of 2012, which I've wondered likely had something to do with a crazy Kundalini awakening I had a couple years later. Strange to hear you mention that, too. And you said Aspergy, well, I have it.
Waybread, nice to meet another Mars in Pisces. Maybe a lot of Mars in Pisces ppl gravitate to astrology. I didn't know Saturn has to do with regret and shame. That makes a ton of sense to me. Funny too that you mention Mars risk-taking; I have Mars square Uranus the so-called "race car driver" aspect. Badass, right?? I feel like I use that to take massive risks in the 'subtle' or 'astral' realms. Yet here in 3D land, that bravery may not be obvious. And having S. Node Capricorn MC, it's even more of a feeling that I have to let go of my desire for any kind of comfortable social status. I act IRL like I don't want it, but on a forum I can be more honest; I do, and it hurts being a nobody with talent.
Here is my chart. A near-bucket shape between Pisces and the Libra/Scorpio cusp (7th house; funny how that answers your question btw, waybread), surrounded by the planets that rule Scorpio. I feel more attuned to my Scorpio energies than Aquarian these days.
I haven't messed with changing the house system. I use the most mainstream one, I forget which one that is; whatever is most plain and vanilla that everyone urges beginners to use, I'm sure that's the one in the chart pictured. Since the Moon is 1st degree (emotional beginner, maybe?) and Saturn is the 4th, perhaps it would easily change houses. I'm curious about your recommendation about a 'concrete project' for emotional release; something involving 7th house action? Hmmm...
Here are aspects to my moon and saturn:
[FONT=comic sans ms, serif]Moon Conjunct Pluto (Lib, 7th)[/FONT]
[FONT=comic sans ms, serif]Moon Conjunct Saturn (Sco, 7th) [/FONT][FONT=comic sans ms, serif]Conjunct Pluto (R, Lib, 7th)[/FONT]
[FONT=comic sans ms, serif]Moon Trine Venus (Pis, 12th) (lucky me!)[/FONT]
[FONT=comic sans ms, serif]Saturn[/FONT][FONT=comic sans ms, serif] Trine Venus
[/FONT][FONT=comic sans ms, serif]Moon Sextile Neptune (Sag, 9th)[/FONT]
[FONT=comic sans ms, serif]Saturn Sextile Neptune[/FONT][FONT=comic sans ms, serif](Sag, 8[/FONT][FONT=comic sans ms, serif]th[/FONT][FONT=comic sans ms, serif])[/FONT]
[FONT=comic sans ms, serif]My feeling on the bulk of that is that... I'm GD psychic but emotionally-empathically thinskinned. It's awesome but way too much for a Fool like me to handle on my own. Thank you for being interested in my chart and helping me!
And the more I talk and talk and talk on forums, trying to heal myself in a blind guessing kind of way, the more I realize... my Mercury Squ Ascendant is the absolute pits.
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