Hi Likewise,
I will weigh in on your very interesting natal chart as both a karmic evolutionary astrologer and as a clinical hypnotherapist/spiritual counsellor/life coach.
First of all here are some links to very handy and excellent sites which will give you the best definitions for your placements:
http://www.myastrologybook.com/planets-in-signs-sign-of-planet.htm
http://www.myastrologybook.com/planets-in-houses-astrology.htm
Be sure to click the "site map" there^ if you want to learn astrology in general.
http://mindfire.ca/The Planets Through the Signs/Contents.htm
http://mindfire.ca/The Planets Through the Houses/Contents.htm
These (as well as other definitions you may find on the Web) are what we call "cookbook" defs (like separate "ingredients" of a "stew") that give the basic meaning isolated from the context of the whole. This is why you may find some contradictions because some placements and aspects will change or even override others -or certain facets of them. As a general rule of thumb in astrology, planets are the WHAT, signs are the HOW, houses are the WHERE, and aspects MODIFY. You have a lot of "modifiers"! Also some astrologers write sign definitions as "the where" or treat houses as the "how" giving sign traits which may not be accurate.
You'll also want to get a handle on which planets rules which signs, so check out the table at:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domicile_(astrology
I can personally relate to a number of things happening in your chart: I too have a stellium of three planets in the 9th house (including Uranus), Moon in the 12th, Sagittarius energy (albeit it's my Rising and Moon, not Sun), a bucket chart pattern that involves Jupiter opposite Saturn, and Chiron in the 3rd House. And I've been through the wringer!
There is a rather difficult karma here in the chart that certainly reflects the "difficult life" you mentioned, but there are also strengths and solutions contained here too if you pursue them. The birth chart is like the hand you are dealt but it is not predetermined on how you will play it! All challenging aspects and placements can be
transmuted --sometimes the hard way through life experience and learning, sometimes through healing and transformation work.
The main source of your malaise is a badly-afflicted and badly-placed Moon. The 12th House is traditionally known by many names including the "House of Karma", "House of Troubles", and "House of Self-Undoing". On the last label, there is a tendency toward subconscious self-sabotage since the Moon represents the subconscious mind . The Moon also represents the mother or family clan so many of your emotional issues are likely sourced to her or them, in past lives if not this one.
To compound matters more, you are now in your Saturn Return which happens around ages 28-30 for most people, because it takes Saturn 28.5 years to revolve around the Sun to get back to its starting or natal point. The Return starts when transiting Saturn reaches the sign of your natal Saturn, it take Saturn 2.5 years to move through the sign completely, and it is strongest when it is closely conjunct your natal Saturn. This is a "coming of age", maturization phase, when people finish college, get married, start a career -very much a "get real and get to work" energy! It's a reality check on the work you
must do. This is mainly because Saturn is the "Lord of Karma" and he is always positioned in the sign and house which was abused, misused or unresolved in some way, and where we must work to make things right. The Saturn Return is a hard time for many people, however those folks who have positive natal Saturn aspects and/or personal planets in Capricorn (the sign which Saturn rules)(like yourself=Venus and Merc) are predisposed to handle this transit a little better than others because there is already some natural traits toward "working hard" (or diligent effort rather), self-discipline and being grounded, which is often a large part of what Saturn requires from us.
Natally, Saturn squares the Moon and yes that's "difficult"(putting it mildly
), but currently transiting Saturn at 7° Cap is starting to square your Moon! This may have the effect of poking those old wounds
, exacerbating fears, and on at least one positive note = applying pressure to solve those problems! Saturn goes retrograde (backwards) for many months every year and it will do so on April 17th when it is in an exact 0° orb square on the Moon. Then it will roll back to square it again in the Fall.
Aside from Saturnian karma, there are three life purposes represented in a natal chart:
1)
The Sun -our essential purpose. Yours is to expand, possibly even teach (Sag) whatever is important to you. This will likely center on 8th House matters like sex, other people's money, that which is hidden, perhaps psychology or even parapsychology, etc. The Sun is ruled or disposited by Jupiter so we have to look there too: Cancer has a nurturing, motherly quality and the 3rd House has to do with teaching kids, communication, writing, etc.
2)
The MidHeaven -our worldly purpose, often the career and position in society. A Cap MC has to do with structure and form somehow which can entail a variety of things. My father has it and he managed and sold building materials and hardware for example. Your MC is ruled by Saturn (therefore whatever this career is it will also work off karma if its constructive) which is in the 9th house of teaching (higher level), religion/philosophy or beliefs, and travel or foreign culture. So this can be giving structure and form to a class, or even starting your own school, or a travel tour company, etc. It's worth noting at this point that the 9th house is naturally associated with Sagittarius so there's a correlation with your Sun sign --see:
http://www.astrology.com.tr/houses.asp
Venus (which is the traditional chart ruler because it rules your Taurus ASC)
is conjunct the MC so sometimes that's a career that can have to do with beauty, design, and Venus also rules money -so there's a possible connection with your Sun in the house of other people's money or resources like real estate, banking, etc. Or Venus=love. Want to be a relationship and sex counsellor?
3)
The North Lunar Node -spiritual or soul purpose, evolution and Dharma. Yours is Aquarius which is often humanitarian, friendly, sometimes it is revolutionary or simply "different" or unique. You need to develop positive Aquarius traits and apply them to the 10th house of career. We need to look to it's ruler to see how else and where else it can be fulfilled and Aquarius is ruled by Saturn (traditional) and Uranus (modern) both of which happen to be in the same sign and house (Cap, 9th) so there's no doubt that your purpose (on many levels here) is Sagittarian!
As you can see, different parts of the chart start to connect together and build toward common themes!
The North (and South, on the same axis) Nodes are squared by Pluto which means a couple of things: someone controlled, manipulated, abused, traumatized and/or murdered you in the past life (and maybe some of these things in this life too as repeating karma), and planets which square the nodal axis are known as the evolutionary "skipped step" as they have to be dealt with first before the North Node can be actualized. So Pluto shows us where our greatest transformation happens and in the 7th house that's one-to-one relationships, either romantic or business.
You have Mars in the 7th too and so conflict and aggression can happen in the relationship arena unless the energy is channeled positively into sex, recreational pursuits like tennis or hiking together, or something collaborative and constructive like building fences together in the backyard.
With a Scorpio Descendant or 7th cusp, you are looking for the traits of Scorpio in a partner because that's your approach to relationship and this sign is ruled by both Pluto and Mars. If you are a woman, you are also looking for the traits of Sag (your Sun, the other male planet), and if you are a guy you are looking for your Moon and Venus (female planets) signs --Cap and Aries.
This means that you need Scorpio energy to transform you, usually through sexual intimacy which is also why your Sun is in Scorpio's natural house -- the 8th of sex. However, getting emotionally-close to someone will likely require resolving emotional issues reflected by Moon square Saturn and Uranus specifically. A hard aspect with Uranus like that can make for emotional instability, being cold, distant and remote (as your mother may have been with you), and the square with Saturn is emotionally rigid, repressing or controlling feelings (again as the mother may have been). The aspects could be karmically-reactive: a fear of being emotionally close and open might be connected to past-life trauma or manipulation reflected by Pluto square the South Node, the negative result of being close to someone in the past. Healing that and learning to trust is important -if that's the case.
I also notice that Chiron (the asteroid which tells us how and where we are wounded) is in Cancer in the 3rd, and the Moon rules Cancer and thus rules or disposits Chiron so your wounds are emotional in nature (Cancer is water=emotions) and connected to mother/family. They affect your beliefs and faith (Chiron conjunct Jupiter) as well as potentially the way you think or communicate (3rd). Your wounds possibly connect to siblings too as that's also the 3rd house.
In fact, since you totally lack planets in air -the element which has to do with the mental body, thoughts and communication - Chiron in the 3rd makes some sense, as well as the evolutionary need to develop the Aquarius air sign through your North Node. Air gives us the ability to "rise above" problems and analyze them. With balanced expressions of fire and water, and an overabundance of earth, you are operating through instincts, emotions, and actions, and in reaction to the world based on those things only.
You have a "bucket" pattern chart and Jupiter is the "handle". It is a hemisphere singleton -the only planet in the bottom half (Northern Hemisphere, unless you were born south of the equator). Singletons take on extra importance as they have to carry the burden in some way. Below the horizon (AC/DC, magnetic axis) is our inner world focus, above is more outer world including the social houses, so your faith/beliefs are the only thing that truly anchors you to that inner reality.
Jupiter is the
focalizer of energy in the chart and forms a large part of your character (especially since it does disposit the Sun too). It forms many oppositions to your Capricorn stellium and oppositions usually play out with other people; awareness is created by confrontation. You will usually identify with one end (or planet) of each opposition, or the other. Some will challenge your beliefs or faith, or you may challenge theirs! Jupiter opposite Saturn usually means that you need to
earn your fortune -no lottery windfalls or free rides.
Most of your planets including the Sun are on the right side of the gravity axis (MC/IC) which is the "fate" side where there is a tendency to "blow with the wind" of others, the world, and/or the cosmos. However, it's through a few planets on the left or freewill side -Venus (your likes), the Moon (your needs and feelings), and Jupiter (faith and beliefs)- that you can (and probably do) make your own destiny.
The strengths in this chart are:
Mars, Pluto, and Saturn are all in domicile or rulership, they are quite powerful and effective and comfortable in their own signs. Jupiter is exalted in Cancer, which is similar to rulership so it does really well there, and the Sun is best in fire signs like Sagittarius.
Pluto conjunct Mars gives you all the power and resilience you need to get things done with a tremendous sexual potency as well! Pluto trines or harmonizes with Jupiter thereby empowering your faith and beliefs as well as facilitating positive and easy transformation of those when it's time to do so. Sun trine Moon often means that mother and father got along which results in harmony between your internal yin & yang natures. This aspect makes it easier to get along with the opposite sex (if that's your orientation, if not then the opposite polarity). Your feelings are in natural accord with your will. Mars sextile Venus also has a similar effect regarding native yin & yang and cooperation with the other sex or polarity, as well as accord between your desire nature (Mars) and what you like and tend to attract (Venus). It can also make someone charming or "sexy" -if you try (sextiles require conscious effort). These aspects lend themselves well toward fulfilling a good and transformative relationship.
Venus (considered a
benefic planet) is
angular, very strong and fortunate to have this on the MidHeaven in particular! This should attract material succe$$!!
To resolve the afflicted 12th House Moon, the Cancerian Chiron in the 3rd, and the lack of air, I recommend the following:
1) Counselling and/or psychotherapy - particularly Cognitive Behavioral Therapy techniques.
2) Hypnotherapy to bypass conscious resistance or confusion and directly heal and reprogram the subconscious mind (which is what the Moon is). Unlike conventional talk therapy, Hypnotherapy doesn't require months or years of it. Depending on the issue(s), anywhere from 1-10 sessions can resolve it/them.
3) Regular meditation. The 12th house produces a lot of psychic "static" (house of the collective unconscious), it makes one very sensitive to other peoples' thoughts and emotions which can be overwhelming. So this motivates a natural desire to retreat into solitude and avoid crowded situations. Things can get kind of blurry in there and that's made worse by the Moon's square with Neptune. Some types of meditation can sort that out, to help distinguish what is yours and what is someone else's astral "stuff" that you may have picked up. And of course one benefit of regular practice is attaining emotional equilibrium.
4) Adopt Buddhist and/or metaphysical philosophies and practice. Like you, I have Uranus in the 9th so I don't go in for any conventional religions, preferring rather to take bits and pieces of different systems that make sense or make my life work. I did regular meditations (some guided) for a while with a Buddhist in a Stupa shrine, and I also bounced my problems off of him for his perspective --and it helped! It's all about thoughts, becoming aware of one's thoughts and there's a certain mental discipline to it. This would really help the effects from having a lack of air element, and sharpen your mental focus. And metaphysics offers healthy, transcendant perspectives on existence and the nature of reality with many tools for manifestation.
Anyway, there are other objects I would consider in the chart too which you didn't include. I'm rarely ever here, but if you'd like to know more, or you have any questions feel free to PM me and that should alert my email.
~H.