Virtue of being self-absorbed?

JUPITERASC

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

Thought food is my favourite kind :w00t:

Exactly, also someone can seem selfish, yet have a heart of gold and another can seem selfless yet have very shady intentions...

I was thinking would it be ok if I PM'ed you with some private questions?

Sorry I don't mean to leave anyone out of the loop,

there's just a few really sensitive areas of my life that I'm not quite ready to fully expose...


VN359r.jpg

Very wise, to maintain your privacy :smile:
our forum rules remind us as follows

QUOTE
Please know that you should take your own risks
if you decide to trust someone else with their astrological services,
as this forum does not undertake any responsibility
for any astrological services, especially those offered against a fee,
via this forum in any form: through public forums or chat,
private messages or emails.

Also remember that this is a public forum,
indexed by search engines (Google, for instance),
so basically everything you post here is not only viewable by any other person,
but it also can be retrieved by a simple internet search
.
 

AtomsInPlace

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.


Very wise, to maintain your privacy :smile:
our forum rules remind us as follows

QUOTE
Please know that you should take your own risks
if you decide to trust someone else with their astrological services,
as this forum does not undertake any responsibility
for any astrological services, especially those offered against a fee,
via this forum in any form: through public forums or chat,
private messages or emails.

Also remember that this is a public forum,
indexed by search engines (Google, for instance),
so basically everything you post here is not only viewable by any other person,
but it also can be retrieved by a simple internet search
.

Thank you for the headsup JUPITERASC

mu5xrV.gif
 

StillOne

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

If you're selfishly involved, you'll always have your back.

If you're selflessly involved, someone else will always else has your back.
Yes, but if you care about others and others care about you, then there's no need to be worried about each others backs.

In other words, if you don't trust the world, it's better to be selfish because you can count on yourself. You don't know if other people will have your back.
Exactly, so there's nobody to trust... no one. Not your mom, your dad, wife, husband, kids, friends, siblings, teachers, police, policy makers, doctors etc. Nobody cares about you or your wellbeing. Someone can take advantage of you at any moment. Maybe those who trust each other will bond together against you. There you are alone since you can't trust anyone and no one can trust you. You have no support.

That sounds just terrible to me. Of course, you have to be armed to the teeth and surely there will never be any type of intimate relationship without trust.

If you do trust the world, it's better to be selfless because you can count on other people.
Precisely :joyful:

You don't know if you will have your back.
Ok if you say so. I know I have my own back. :whistling:


In the end though, we are all responsible for ourselves and what we might do. We have no idea what other people might do. It's better to be selfish because at least yourself is the most predictable person on Earth.
Let's define selfish.

self·ish
ˈselfiSH/Submit
adjective
(of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.
"I joined them for selfish reasons"
synonyms: egocentric, egotistic, egotistical, egomaniacal, self-centered, self-absorbed, self-obsessed, self-seeking, self-serving, wrapped up in oneself; inconsiderate, thoughtless, unthinking, uncaring, uncharitable; mean, miserly, grasping, greedy, mercenary, acquisitive, opportunistic; informal looking after number one
"he is just selfish by nature"

Let's drop selfless in there as well,

self·less
ˈselfləs/Submit
adjective
concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than with one's own; unselfish.
"an act of selfless devotion"
synonyms: unselfish, altruistic, self-sacrificing, self-denying; considerate, compassionate, kind, noble, generous, magnanimous, ungrudging, charitable, benevolent, openhanded
"it was very selfless of you to help out your ex-husband like that"
 
Last edited:

StillOne

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

Everyone is self-absorbed differently, meaning, everyone wants, desires, and needs different things. If one person has something you want, and you have something they want, you can help each other selfishly. And if you want something that someone else doesn't have, you don't have to waste your time on them and vice versa. I think that's way better than just being selfless and hoping that what you're doing will help the other person at your own expense.

There lies dapper dressed AppLeo in the middle of the Grand Ball choking on the dessert of the evening... that sumptuous chocolate banana split with extra whipped cream. There's only gasps from AppLeo's suffocating throat as that banana has become stuck. Guests all stand around watching the young man as he lay slowly dying on the floor.

AppLeo, is astonished as no one comes to his assistance! After all, his selfish nature has gotten him to the top of the company. He is important! However, his inconsiderate, thoughtless, unthinking, uncaring, uncharitable; mean, miserly, grasping, greedy, mercenary, acquisitive, and opportunistic ways don't sit well with the people around him. So they return to focusing on themselves, and let AppLeo die in the middle of the dance floor.

Assuredly, at least his lover should come to his rescue, no?! He knew his lover wasn't shy about a little mouth-to-mouth once in awhile and probably wouldn't mind a lil extra chocolate banana split either! Come help me!! Unfortunately AppLeo's recent lover is in the corner hooking up with the receptionist. So predictable, since AppLeo always said to focus on oneself before anyone else.
 

AppLeo

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

Yes, but if you care about others and others care about you, then there's no need to be worried about each others backs.

Yes, but if you care about others there is a possibility that they will be using you; and when you really do need there help they will abandon you. At least if you're selfish, you don't have to worry about you abandoning yourself.

Exactly, so there's nobody to trust... no one. Not your mom, your dad, wife, husband, kids, friends, siblings, teachers, police, policy makers, doctors etc. Nobody cares about you or your wellbeing. Someone can take advantage of you at any moment. Maybe those who trust each other will bond together against you. There you are alone since you can't trust anyone and no one can trust you. You have no support.

If you're selfishly involved, you'll require the resources (people, objects, whatever) to help you get through life. The best support is the support of yourself. Other people are wishy-washy and unpredictable. Trust is something is broken quite easily.

That sounds just terrible to me. Of course, you have to be armed to the teeth and surely there will never be any type of intimate relationship without trust.

Intimate relationships are not necessary.

Precisely :joyful:

:joyful:

Ok if you say so. I know I have my own back. :whistling:

Selfless people give themselves away to others because they fear their own responsibility and independence.

Let's define selfish.

self·ish
ˈselfiSH/Submit
adjective
(of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.
"I joined them for selfish reasons"
synonyms: egocentric, egotistic, egotistical, egomaniacal, self-centered, self-absorbed, self-obsessed, self-seeking, self-serving, wrapped up in oneself; inconsiderate, thoughtless, unthinking, uncaring, uncharitable; mean, miserly, grasping, greedy, mercenary, acquisitive, opportunistic; informal looking after number one
"he is just selfish by nature"

Absolutely nothing wrong with that. Selfish people can serve each other selfishly. Better than serving selfless people who serve you selflessly.

Let's drop selfless in there as well,

self·less
ˈselfləs/Submit
adjective
concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than with one's own; unselfish.
"an act of selfless devotion"
synonyms: unselfish, altruistic, self-sacrificing, self-denying; considerate, compassionate, kind, noble, generous, magnanimous, ungrudging, charitable, benevolent, openhanded
"it was very selfless of you to help out your ex-husband like that"

See, that's stupid. Why even live if other people are above your own life? Selfless people are enablers for selfish people to be extremely selfish.
 

AppLeo

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

There lies dapper dressed AppLeo in the middle of the Grand Ball choking on the dessert of the evening... that sumptuous chocolate banana split with extra whipped cream. There's only gasps from AppLeo's suffocating throat as that banana has become stuck. Guests all stand around watching the young man as he lay slowly dying on the floor.

AppLeo, is astonished as no one comes to his assistance! After all, his selfish nature has gotten him to the top of the company. He is important! However, his inconsiderate, thoughtless, unthinking, uncaring, uncharitable; mean, miserly, grasping, greedy, mercenary, acquisitive, and opportunistic ways don't sit well with the people around him. So they return to focusing on themselves, and let AppLeo die in the middle of the dance floor.

Assuredly, at least his lover should come to his rescue, no?! He knew his lover wasn't shy about a little mouth-to-mouth once in awhile and probably wouldn't mind a lil extra chocolate banana split either! Come help me!! Unfortunately AppLeo's recent lover is in the corner hooking up with the receptionist. So predictable, since AppLeo always said to focus on oneself before anyone else.

:lol: LOL

Okay I guess you got me :w00t:

------------------------

But seriously, I won't choke on dessert. Plus, it would not be my lover's selfish interest to let me die. I would argue that letting me die is selfless. To love and care for someone is selfish by nature.
 

AppLeo

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

"No, you see, I am in love with him selfishly. It is through my own interest to help him if he ever needed it. I would not call that a sacrifice because I take selfish pleasure in it."

"It is immoral if it a love placed above oneself. It is more than immoral; it is impossible. Because when you are asked to love everybody indiscriminately, that is to love them without any standard, to love them regardless whether if they have any value or virtue, then you are asked to love nobody."

"What would it mean to have love above self-interest? It would mean for instance that the husband would tell his wife that he were moral according to conventional morality that, 'I marrying you just for your own sake. I have no personal interest in it, but I am so unselfish that I am marrying you only for your own good.' Would any women like that?"

"In love, the currency is virtue. You love people not for what you do for them or what they do for you. You them for their values and virtues. You don't love cousins; you don't love everyone indiscriminately. You only love those who deserve it. Man has free-will; if a man wants love, he should correct his flaws and he may deserve it, but he cannot expect the unearned."

Quotes by Ayn Rand.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQVrMzWtqgU&feature=share
 

StillOne

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

See, that's stupid. Why even live if other people are above your own life? Selfless people are enablers for selfish people to be extremely selfish.

Who said above? How about on par. :unsure:

I suppose it's evident, then, that there are quite a few extremely selfish people out and about.
 
Last edited:

StillOne

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

Who me?!

I care about my friends and family.

Obviously there's a range involved. There are very few that occupy the very end of each spectrum. You can be somewhere in between, which may be explained a bit by your "D&D alignment" thread. I recall you being Chaotic Neutral while I tested Neutral Good. Lol, something to think about!
 

AppLeo

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

Obviously there's a range involved. There are very few that occupy the very end of each spectrum. You can be somewhere in between, which may be explained a bit by your "D&D alignment" thread. I recall you being Chaotic Neutral while I tested Neutral Good. Lol, something to think about!

Yes, I got Chaotic Neutral.

Hmm... :unsure:

Well, I'm not chaotic evil so whatever.
 

AtomsInPlace

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

Perhaps Self-Centered is a better concept than Selfish?

To be centered in oneself is to have inner harmony and strength so that the behaviour of others does not throw us off balance and effect our ability to love. By maintaining our equilibrium, we are in a better position to be of service to others. By being of service we are growing and evolving (Self-centered) and also allowing and inspiring others to grow and evolve (Selfless).

We stay centered by knowing our needs and knowing exactly how to get them fulfilled and doing it. It also means taking the time to focus inwards so that you may discern between what you need vs what you want.

It's ok to have desires and fulfill them, yet at the same time, the more desires we have, the higher the risk of us getting bogged down in fulfilling "selfish" desires and actually ending up neglecting our true needs. Thus we lose control over ourselves and become a liability to others and ourselves.

That is why we will always need people/souls who Love...Otherwise entropy would be the result. Love renews and expands.

If one looks at it from the perspective of Soul Evolution (If you entertain such thoughts)

Perhaps one could say that there is no great growth in only loving those whom we deem to be lovable...

Great growth comes from loving those whom we deem to be unlovable, by our own feelings and standards, someone who is unlovable to you might be very lovable to another.

Love manifests in infinite ways depending on the situation and the people/energies involved.

To love someone does not have to manifest as you regularily associating with that person. It might manifest as cutting that person loose so that they can grow too, that is loving, even if it doesn't seem so on the surface.

So if you cut that person loose and it hurts you, or you stand to lose something, then in that situation you are being primarily Selfless, whilst at the same time gaining Self-centered growth and maintaining your equlilibrium.

The other person will naturally (most often) see you as being Selfish.
 
Last edited:

JUPITERASC

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

Yes, but if you care about others there is a possibility that they will be using you;
and when you really do need there help they will abandon you.
At least if you're selfish,
you don't have to worry about you abandoning yourself.

If you're selfishly involved, you'll require the resources
(people, objects, whatever)
to help you get through life.
The best support is the support of yourself.
Other people are wishy-washy and unpredictable.
Trust is something is broken quite easily.

Intimate relationships are not necessary.

:joyful:
"It is the egocentric life that is suffering, the Buddha realized
the life conditioned by conceit

that needs a self to be built up and protected :smile:

and separated out
in its own version of dissociation
from the rest of the universe."
- Mark Epstein
 

JUPITERASC

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

Selfless people give themselves away to others
because they fear their own responsibility and independence.
Selfless are the most responsible people of all
because they take responsibility for the well being of others
not solely themselves :smile:
 

JUPITERASC

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.


Absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Selfish people can serve each other selfishly.
Better than serving selfless people who serve you selflessly.
Siriusly .... selfish people serve only themselves :smile:
Selfless people request no one to serve them
 

JUPITERASC

Well-known member
Re: Feeling guilty about my natal chart.

"No, you see, I am in love with him selfishly. It is through my own interest to help him if he ever needed it. I would not call that a sacrifice because I take selfish pleasure in it."

"It is immoral if it a love placed above oneself. It is more than immoral; it is impossible. Because when you are asked to love everybody indiscriminately, that is to love them without any standard, to love them regardless whether if they have any value or virtue, then you are asked to love nobody."

"What would it mean to have love above self-interest?
It would mean for instance that the husband would tell his wife that he were moral according to conventional morality that, 'I marrying you just for your own sake. I have no personal interest in it, but I am so unselfish that I am marrying you only for your own good.' Would any women like that?"
An alternative example of
what it would mean to have love above self interest :smile:

Instead of putting self interest above love
Bill Gates could raise his employees quality of life
by paying them reasonable wages
But Bill Gates would then no longer be 'the worlds richest man'
and that's why tens of hundred of millions of workers suffer debt slave wages
so one persons self interest may continue to flourish





76bd1a3884dfbe6723aab36d43b12129.jpg
 
Last edited:
Top