There has always been this dark energy I feel within me what is it?

Minigirl1997

Well-known member
Now when I say dark I do mean potential to harm. I am the sweetest person but every since I was a little kid I had this intuitive feeling. On the flip side I do feel like it is for my protection because I do encounter harsh ppl who are messed up.Now be patient with me because I am learning but I did look into asteroids ( as well as my chart) I have my true Lilith in my first and my mean in the 12th. Idk if that's the influence? I had read that ppl with the Lilith in the 12 literally can be walking karma to ppl and they have dark ancestors is that true? If not what is this feeling? I feel like others since it to so I can't doubt I do have it for a reason like for my protection of course

https://photos.app.goo.gl/tCDfWnek2BYggPoj6
 
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kolani

Well-known member
Sun conjunct North Node in 12 house = Dark/Mysterious Spiritual Tone

Chart Ruler = Venus in Scorpio = Dark/Mysterious Physical Aura

Venus at Aries point = 0 degrees Scorpio= VERY strong Scorpio Feel

Hope this helps!
 

Frisiangal

Well-known member
Now when I say dark I do mean potential to harm. I am the sweetest person but every since I was a little kid I had this intuitive feeling. On the flip side I do feel like it is for my protection because I do encounter harsh ppl who are messed up................
I have my true Lilith in my first and my mean in the 12th. Idk if that's the influence? I had read that ppl with the Lilith in the 12 literally can be walking karma to ppl and they have dark ancestors is that true? If not what is this feeling? I feel like others since it to so I can't doubt I do have it for a reason like for my protection of course

Hi,
Looking back at your previous posts and answers received to them, have you thought about the truths contained within them .... or not? Do you consider yourself to have a vivid imagination that can replace ....or takes over from .... the realism you experience? The energy within the Earth signs Virgo and Capricorn are in Water houses in your chart, which can mean that 'groundedness' perception can get washed away and a person is more influenced by the effect upon inner feelings.
At 24 years old MEAN Lilith in the 12th house in Virgo will have more effect than TRUE Lilith, that seems to make its presence felt following menopause!!!! That which is 'imagined' is seen for the truth ....or not ... represented in and by it.

As mentioned by kolani, chart ruler Venus is in Scorpio. Note its aspects.
Venus sextile Mercury, yet square Uranus. Venus also rules 9th house ....the reasoning behind one's belief patterns.

Mercury inconjunct Uranus and square Pluto. Mercury in Virgo's realistic thought pattern sign is shaken up by Uranus's sudden lightning strikes and Pluto's destructive bulldozer effect. This could relate to mentally/emotionally unstabilising a person's rational nature. The 'ungroundedness' within the inherent trine aspects can take one out of the reality of situations into the protection of its own imagined private world where no harm can come to it. (My first astrology teacher taught that Neptune represents 'the dome' that one engulfs around one's self to keep undesired outer influences at bay).
MEAN Lilith in the 12th house is a mistress in disguise in inwardly creating this ability. Perfect for the 'make-believe' fictional roles it plays, as well as the absolute faith in a celestial force .... or its own.
MEAN Lilith conjunct Sun is often indicative of a lack of personal identity. The biological and forming paternal influence is missing (Sun inconjunct Saturn) or unknown and 'the hero figure' (Sun sextile Mars) can replace it. As part of the inherent trine aspect, a person can completely surrender itself ...or submit ... to a power it considers greater and beyond itself that provides the protection sought. UNTIL it finds the inner strength that lies within itself to take on the role. :smile:
 
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Ukpoohbear

Well-known member
Lilith in the 12th house could literally mean not owning your own darkness and I see that in your choice of words - ‘I am the sweetest person,’ and then contrast it with ‘I do encounter harsh people.’

How about you look for ways in which other people are sweet and ways in which you are dark?
 

CapAquaPis

Well-known member
I have a 8th house sun/moon in Aquarius under the essence of the scorpion, an Aquarian planet like Uranus is squaring them (5th house), and that explains my life has been not a fairly good one, but emotionally, 8th house people adapt to their "dark" surroundings and tried hard to go on with their own lives they are blessed to have, the problem is: how can they make their own lives better in the long run? Accused of negativity, fatalism, nihilism, a bad moral relativity, and a poor sense of reality, that's the power of a 8th sun and the force of a 8th moon.
 

CapAquaPis

Well-known member
Sun conjunct North Node in 12 house = Dark/Mysterious Spiritual Tone

Chart Ruler = Venus in Scorpio = Dark/Mysterious Physical Aura

Venus at Aries point = 0 degrees Scorpio= VERY strong Scorpio Feel

Hope this helps!

Sign points or degrees in each one of the 12 signs in the zodiac:
0-2.5 Aries (2.5 would be 2' 30", the zenith-S is 17' Aries).
2.5-5 Taurus (Venus' ruler along with Libra).
5-7.5 Gemini (my natal Venus is 7' 3" Aries).
7.5-10 Cancer (Venus at my birth time is 7' 6").
10-12.5 Leo (my natal Jupiter in 9' conjunct Mars in 6' Virgo).
12.5-15 Virgo (my natal Mercury in 13' 49" Pisces).
15-17.5 Libra (halfway, the zenith-N is 17' Libra).
17.5-20 Scorpio (my natal Pluto is 21' 17" Libra).
20-22.5 Sagittarius (my natal Moon is 20' 17" Aquarius).
22.5-25 Capricorn (my natal sun is 26' 20" Aquarius).
25-27.5 Aquarius (my natal Uranus in 25' 29" Scorpio).
27.5-30 Pisces (my natal Saturn in 24-25' conjunct Lilith in 25-26' Virgo).
My nodes: NN in 29' Leo cusp Virgo and SS' in 29' Aquarius cusp Pisces.
The MC: 2-3' in Aries vs IC: 2-3' Libra.
And my natal Neptune in 22' Sagittarius close to the dreaded 23rd degree.

And my PM sect/diurnal sect chart (Feb 15, 1980 on a new moon, 2:20pm Pacific time, So CA US) places me in a "dimming" sun or "waning" moon type of a "dusk" profile I give off towards people to know me a partially "bright" person .
 

kolani

Well-known member
Also-a little asteroid like Lilith is not nearly as powerful as the North Node (ecliptic axis) conjunct Sun (brightest star)- that's a VERY powerful (and rare) cosmic combo that underscores spirituality.

the life path =Sun is married to/joined at the hip to the spiritual path = North Node

not to mention the twelfth house is arguably the most spiritual/mysterious house- hands down

asteroids color the chart- but you since you don't have a strong Lilith signature (no major aspects to planets or angles) Lilith is like a faint sub tone- OOPS my bad- I just checked and Lilith is in between the Sun and the North node- definitely worthy of interpretation-
Kelly Hunter's "Black Moon Lilith " is a great little gem .

btw- famed avant garde director David Lynch has a strong Lilith signature in his chart- perhaps his work may speak to you? (Muhulland Drive, etc)


Researching the significance of the twelfth house is essential to this chart- the 12th house is the most fascinating house, imo.

It is the realm of other states of consciousness- angels, dreams, meditation, spiritual insight, and the like- THIS combined with that Sun North node conjunction is likely what you're experiencing when you mention "dark feelings".

Also- with the North node influence- there would be an impulse to step INTO that darkness and learn how to embrace it- that may be your biggest challenges/greatest gift-I'd definitely suggest Jan Spiller's book on the North Node and read her chapter on the 12th house.

Best Wishes~

k
 
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Frisiangal

Well-known member
Also-a little asteroid like Lilith ............

asteroids color the chart- ............


k

Just to say that Minigirl1997 's post and chart referred to the positions of MEAN and TRUE Black Moon Lilith, the non-physical points of focus between Moon's apogee and Earth.
The asteroid Lilith is a physical object among tens of thoudsands of others.:wink:

Kelly Hunter's "Black Moon Lilith " is a great little gem .

It was reading her article in August 1999 that was sent to me in the same week as the total solar eclipse was exact conjunct my natal 12th house Jupiter, that produced a sort of epiphany that led me into studying the working and effects of MEAN Black Moon Lilith upon human nature.

I have an almost exact Chiron-MEAN BML in 12th house partile Virgo Ascendant square Uranus-M.C in Gemini.

With a passion for health astrology, it was correspondence with a fellow astrologer regarding MEAN BML's (the unexpressed/dormant natural talent) possible association with physical disorders that has become an integral part of that continuing study. Its position in harsh aspect can be considered more relevant than the would be expected average.

:smile:
 
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