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Horary Questions on Relational Issues For horary questions about relationships.


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  #1  
Unread 02-09-2012, 12:35 AM
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Victoria Victoria is offline
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What does he want with me?

I feel like such a cliche for asking that question, but desperate times...

There is this friend of mine, a guy who I've known -online- since
I was 17, and he was just turned 20. We're into the same things,
and it's always felt like we've complimented one another quite well.

We've been pen pals, since then (early 2007) but never anything more than the occational (very much occational) flirt.
Only once did we ever meet up, and that was by chance as we found
out we were going to the same concert, on the same day.
Later on we had a party at me and a friends hotel room.
Hug, nothing more.

Today, I got a mail from him, and the conversation ended with him
asking me if I wanted to come and spend the weekend in his town.
He has just moved back to his hometown and therefor lives ca 5 h. away from me. I said I'll think about it.

I don't know if he means romantically or if he wants to help me, as
i've told him I've had a very bad time lately,
with my depression, and wanting to escape.

Is this only a friend thing or could there be a potential romance?

He does not know his time of birth, so I didn't know what to put up
but my own horary chart. Scream out if you want natal aswell, and
a general natal for him.

He's an aqua sun
gemini moon
aqua venus, aswell.

Any help, tips, advice will be cherished
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Last edited by Victoria; 02-09-2012 at 02:10 AM.
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  #2  
Unread 02-09-2012, 06:13 AM
dr. farr dr. farr is offline
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Re: What does he want with me?

(Following is not in accordance with standard horary delineation and uses whole sign house format)

-you = 1st house = Mars significator
-your co-significator = the Moon
-he = 7th house = Taurus
-his 5th house (romantic pleasures) = 5th from 7th = Virgo in this chart
-his 11th house (friends and associates) = 11th from 7th = Pisces in this chart
-you (Mars) posit his 5th house of romantic interest/pleasures
-your co-significator Moon is also posited in his 5th house of romantic interest
Answer: chart indicates he is interested in you from a potential romantic motivation.
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  #3  
Unread 02-10-2012, 11:39 PM
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Victoria Victoria is offline
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Re: What does he want with me?

Ohh, bother..
never mind, now I know anyway.

Thank you so much as always, Dr. Farr

xx
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Unread 02-11-2012, 02:05 AM
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Re: What does he want with me?

I agree with Dr Farr, this person seems to have interest in you from a romantic perspective, but I'd say be careful with him. His ruler changed signs and now is in Aries, where Venus is in detriment. The change of signs does point him to be in new circumstances - recent change of location. But he is also about to conjucnt Uranus, very unpredicatable here...He is in your rulership which shows him being interested in you, however because Venus is in detriment, he may not have the best intentions for this to be anything other than just a fling...

Moon is also VOID for now, so I'd say nothing much will happen here right now...You may date him but I don't think its a longterm relatioship here....

Just have fun and enjoy!

Last edited by rafaella; 02-11-2012 at 02:08 AM.
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  #5  
Unread 02-11-2012, 10:12 AM
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Re: What does he want with me?

That was why I was asking, you see.
I am quite naive in "love" and so I don't really feel like i know what someones intentions are. Since I already feel so close to this guy, and oftentimes have thought of us as friends for live. He seemed to me to be indipendent, and artist, fun and honest at all time.
So when I start getting texts from him at two in the morning saying basically it's now or never, then I feel a sudden death, sortof a thing.

I dont know if I am ready for a fling or a relationship with him.
But how is it possible to find someone so endlessly fascinating without
any romantic feelings? Maybe they are there, deep down, i don't know.

Most of all I never wanted our relationship to change.
I wanted us to be honest and real and sweet to one anther.
We're pen pals, and send letters, and that would ALL change if it became something more. I don't think I want to.
But if I say no, where would that put us... gahh. MEN!

Thank you so much rafaella, and dr. farr !
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  #6  
Unread 02-11-2012, 12:15 PM
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Re: What does he want with me?

well if you don't really want things to change and are happy with your friendship then maybe its good idea to make it clear to him, before you go to his town. Or you may find yourself in a situation that will be difficult to deal with and may have an impact on your friendship.

Quote:
I dont know if I am ready for a fling or a relationship with him.
But how is it possible to find someone so endlessly fascinating without
any romantic feelings? Maybe they are there, deep down, i don't know.
You have known him for quite sometime, so I guess there is a good friendship there. But also I have found that having an online friendship/relationship can make some people idealise the other person, as you only know what the other person chooses to tell you. Not until you meet the person and form a face to face relationship that you can really start to get to know them more realistically and read their face expressions, body language etc. I guess you both may have this skewed view of each other right now, as you find him fascinating.

Quote:
Most of all I never wanted our relationship to change.
I wanted us to be honest and real and sweet to one anther.
We're pen pals, and send letters, and that would ALL change if it became something more. I don't think I want to.
But if I say no, where would that put us... gahh. MEN!
Just read what you've written, and the answer is there...you don't want things to change then don't go that path. Its as simple as that, but make sure he is aware of this. I don't think you should be afraid of saying what you think to him, be honest with yourself and with him... If he ends the friendship between you because you refused to develop something with him, then maybe he is not worth having as a friend anymore...

If I were you I'd thank him for the offer and politely decline...just say you are busy etc..Or if you really want to go to his town then possibly its good to respectfully tell him you really like him as a friend and nothing else...and that you hope you will continue your friendship.


Just listen to yourself and what you really want and follow your own intuition!!!


Best of luck!

Last edited by rafaella; 02-11-2012 at 12:18 PM.
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  #7  
Unread 02-12-2012, 02:40 AM
dr. farr dr. farr is offline
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Re: What does he want with me?

Note that although the horary chart indicates that he has a romantic motivation, it does NOT (necessarily) mean that he is going to "push it", or that he will necessarily make "moves" toward you, demonstrating this: his attitude toward you could and actions toward you, could well remain exactly the same as they have been in the past: your horary question delved into his INNER (causal) motivations and desires and thoughts about you-these things he might well keep hidden from you, he might not ever openly act in these ways toward you unless you descide to encourage him in this direction.
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  #8  
Unread 02-12-2012, 09:19 PM
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Re: What does he want with me?

I thankfully deceline the invitation.
He was being a bit brutal on the "now or never" bits of his text,
but when I said No, i can't because of this and this and this,
finally I just got a text saing basically
do what you want, at least you were invited.
Talk later.

That really hurt in a way. I dont know why,
but absolutely, I've looked up to him for many years
watching him doing his art and really working hard.
Then, all of a suddnt a man who wants to pressure me, in a way.

Are there any ways of telling How long he's been feeling this towards me?
I'm getting the feeling that it wasn't my company he was longing for, if you know what I mean. So, not that long?

Anyway,
Rafaella and Dr. Farr - you are GOLD

xx
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  #9  
Unread 02-13-2012, 11:46 AM
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rafaella rafaella is offline
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Re: What does he want with me?

Don't feel bad for the way you handled this, you had to act in a way that was comfortable for you and felt right...so you did nothing wrong. He may sulk for a while, so just give him time..

It looks like things changed for him just recently, when he moved to the other location...

you take care and let us know how things go....
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  #10  
Unread 02-13-2012, 01:41 PM
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Re: What does he want with me?

Just passing by today and saw this horary. My thoughts are that he is marginally interested or not at all romantically interested. His 5th house (Libra cusp) is ruled by that detrimented Venus in Aries. (not by Mercury Dr.Farr, at least not in this chart which is Placidus. I did not look at the Regiomontanus version so it is possible that your calculation of his 5th house comes from there?). So her Mars, 5th house ruler, falls in his 4th house if I am seeing this clearly. Not a very upbeat love feeling I would say, even though he falls in her sign.

Starlink
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  #11  
Unread 02-14-2012, 09:34 AM
dr. farr dr. farr is offline
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Re: What does he want with me?

Hi Starlink!! Glad you looked in-we miss you here!!

I used whole sign house (as always!) in my delineation, in which quesited's 5th = Virgo = Mercury significator.

Hope you come around much more often!
Happy Valentine's Day to you!
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  #12  
Unread 02-14-2012, 11:46 AM
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Re: What does he want with me?

Oh Starlink, lovely to see you here again!!! You were one of my gurus here when I first started studying horary....)) Missed studying your interpretations!

Hope to see you here more often!
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  #13  
Unread 02-14-2012, 05:21 PM
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Re: What does he want with me?

Hi guys! Well, I will try to pop in more often but wont promise as my life is filled with new and different things at the moment. Still, horary keeps on fascinating me so this section has most chance of seeing me again!
Dr.Farr, I do adhere to the ancient use of Regiomontanus when it comes to horary interpretation. When we look at it from William Lilly's point of view, what do you think this horary will then have as outcome? The only thing changing is the North Node which now falls in her 2nd house and Jupiter falls in this Regiomontanus chart in the 6th house. And what I also noticed right now is that the ruler of her Asc. ruler and Moon, Mercury, is combust whch indeed shows how Victoria feels. But Mars also rules his Venus and the end result is then also a combusted Mars ruler. The last aspect Moon makes (always important I was taught when it comes to a Positive or Negative outcome, is a conjunction with Mars, also not really great. I still think that they might remain to be friends (Mars rules his 11th house and Moon, (Victoria's co-ruler) is going to conjunct it) but I think it depends on Victoria. Saturn, her 3rd house ruler of communication is in a critical degree and does not make an aspect with his 3rd house ruler Moon. Her Saturn retro also shows that she is thinking things over or "pulls back" from contacting him, at least for now. Venus and Moon, nor Venus and Mars make contact with one another so I still think that there is not much going on between them romantically.
See you guys!! Happy Valentines Day to all of you! Starlink
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  #14  
Unread 02-24-2012, 08:47 PM
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Victoria Victoria is offline
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Re: What does he want with me?

wow! Didn't see you there!

Starlink, Dr.Farr and Rafaella, thank you all for your help.
All of you have made alot of good points, and all of it seems true to me.
I very much doubt he has strong feelings for me (as that would surely be open to me much sooner?? I have 'known' him for 5 years, after all)
but when he suddently asked me to come for a weekend at his house
right before valentines, and then seemed upset when I said no..
Well, that seemed to me to be a bit of a flag. I had to ask!!

I am absolutely curious about this man, but right now didnt seem
the time at all for a start of any kind of relationship for me.
And anyway, I'd like to know that we'll always be able to send silly letters
to one another without it meaning, well, really anything.
It seems to me that is impossible now, anyway.
So like you said, Starlink, I will stay away from him for a while.
I think.

Thank all of you for your advice, and help.
x
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