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  #1  
Unread 11-29-2016, 08:01 PM
LyP LyP is offline
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Posts: 393
self esteem issues

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I think I have problems of self-esteem, and consequently of relationships
I do not know how to set limits between myself and others, I do not know what's right to forgive and what is not, I always find everyone insensitive and uneducated, not kind, selfish
I feel like I always have to forgive, forgive, give in, but I do not do it, because other people do not do it to me, I never get an "excuse me",or "i'm sorry"

I'm too lazy to try to have relationships with someone, I can not like anyone, I always see the faults of other people,I rarely find qualities in others
For example: if a person lies to me, and I realize, I already cut the relationship

Because I feel that i am the perfect partner when I relate to someone, I treat person so good way, I never lie, I give everything to please, I give gifts, but the person never reciprocates, on the contrary ... it repays me with lack of Gentleness, lies, indifference, gossip
everyone,everone

I'm always disappointed with everyone

Sometimes I want to kill myself. I'm an evolutionary aberration.
i'm ugly,weird,dumb...

i want to live totaly isolated
sartre are totally right
"the hell is the other"

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  #2  
Unread 11-29-2016, 10:20 PM
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waybread waybread is offline
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Re: self esteem issues

Lyp, you do have what I would consider to be a difficult chart. Do you want an astrological explanation?

Briefly, with sun (your identity) conjunct Chiron, "it hurts to be you." Your Scorpio planets (sun, Mercury) are squared by Uranus and Jupiter. With Uranus in the mix, just when you think you know who you are, suddenly some event or person upsets your understanding of yourself. The Jupiter square can make other people see you as arrogant, even when you are not trying to do this. Moon square Mars can make you feel irritable; and with Mars in the first house and Pluto on your ascendant, other people may actually think of you as aggressive-- even when you are not noticeably doing anything overtly aggressive.

But your chart also has some strengths. With moon trine Neptune, you probably have a vivid, rich imagination. This can work for you if you have any interests in the arts. Those favourable aspects to Saturn can give you considerable staying power. If you want to achieve something, you can make yourself work until you obtain it.

This may surprise you a bit, but I don't think your horoscope shows that you are strongly oriented towards other people. With your 12th house emphasis, you may prefer to be alone, possibly working behind the scenes.

Of course, you should forgive people who behave badly towards you. Not because what they did was OK with you, but because carrying a grudge against someone harms you on the inside, and doesn't make for a fair relationship with the other person. Try to let go of your issues with people who don't know how to be a good friend to you.

If you try simply to be kind and pleasant to people, that is sufficient. Friends generally don't need gifts unless it is something small and appropriate for a particular occasion. In time, other people will learn to appreciate your loyalty; but they are going to have to get through the barriers you put up in front of other people to do so.

Time is on your side. You are at an age where teenagers begin to shift from a more childhood mode of operation to becoming more like responsible adults. Most of those mean girls and guys will start to mature into nicer adults.

What is it that you really love just now? Can you focus on that for a while? With your first house Mars trining your 5th house Saturn, you might be good at some kind of solo endurance sport, like long-distance running, cycling, or wilderness trips.

Your north node of personal growth is in your 10th house of career, so this might be a good time, just for now, to focus on getting the education needed to pursue your career in life.
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My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.

Last edited by waybread; 11-29-2016 at 10:22 PM.
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  #3  
Unread 11-30-2016, 04:36 PM
LyP LyP is offline
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Re: self esteem issues

yeah its hurt to be me ._.

I will try to be a singer
Do you see this talent on my chart?
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  #4  
Unread 11-30-2016, 05:30 PM
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waybread waybread is offline
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Re: self esteem issues

Venus in your first house, trine Saturn in your 5th, and your 10th house moon-Neptune trine should help you.

Sometimes a chart doesn't give a specific career, so much as saying what you would do, or how you would go about it, if you chose a particular career.

Some of the best singers and songwriters come out of that dark place you experience, and then pour out their feelings when they sing. Notably blues singers.

See if your music can give you such an outlet.

But you won't know till you try. Sing, if you can, at a local coffee house, on Youtube, or any venue where you can get started. See how you get on.
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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