Venus / Neptune people

This is kind of interesting to me. I was looking back at the natal charts to most of the men I have dated for prolonged periods of time and all of them have Venus / Neptune contacts. What is the significance of that? I wonder what it is that draws those people to me.

College bf: Venus in Leo trine Neptune in Sagittarius
Live-in bf: Venus in Leo trine Neptune in Sagittarius
Prolonged rebound from live-in bf (it was almost a year so I will count him): Venus in Cancer opposite Neptune in Capricorn
Current bf: Venus in Pisces square Neptune in Sagittarius

Venus / Neptune people, how do you experience love? What sort of people are drawn to? How do your relationships seem to go (what is the tone / common theme, etc.)? I'm so curious because I just noticed this little theme I have going with the men that are attracted to me. I have a girlfriend with Venus in Leo trine Neptune in Sagittarius and she is always getting burned. She always chooses a guy who hurts her and cheats on her, or whatever. It's easier for me to judge the aspect based on watching her than the men I've been with, but I would say that perhaps these people idealize the person they are with and turn a blind eye to their flaws? I know I have told her many times that she sees things through rose tinted glasses and chooses to avoid reality because she is afraid of being alone (sometimes you have to give some tough love!).

Ahh Anjelik! Yet another stimulating topic you have initiated. I have Venus in Gemini conjunct Ascendant opposite Neptune in Capricorn conjunct descendant. My relationships have been to the very unusual and extreme. Either she was extremely nice or she happened to have a dark secret. In most of relationships so far, my heart has consistently battled with my mind. This opposition has put me through much and even though it shows me what a real person is like, I have chosen to ignore it and listen to my heart. The end result was inevitable suffering. I often feel like I'm left hanging in limbo especially when she does not respond back to me. To make matters worse, I have Pluto in Scorpio in 5th which bestows obsessive tendencies towards love affairs. Pluto tightly trines Neptune which I'm sure allows the obsessive tendencies to flow quite smoothly. Again, this isn't good either. However, as astrology has taught us that everything evolves round karma, I will have to learn the lesson in this life the hard way.

[QUOTE]....but I would say that perhaps these people idealize the person they are with and turn a blind eye to their flaws? I know I have told her many times that she sees things through rose tinted glasses and chooses to avoid reality because she is afraid of being alone [/QUOTE]

The above description has summed up what I have experienced. In my opinion I wouldn't say this is one of the more favourable aspects relationship wise. Wherever Venus and Neptune are in aspect it generally causes instability in relationships.

The_Saturnian said:

Ahh Anjelik! Yet another stimulating topic you have initiated. I have Venus in Gemini conjunct Ascendant opposite Neptune in Capricorn conjunct descendant. My relationships have been to the very unusual and extreme. Either she was extremely nice or she happened to have a dark secret. In most of relationships so far, my heart has consistently battled with my mind. This opposition has put me through much and even though it shows me what a real person is like, I have chosen to ignore it and listen to my heart. The end result was inevitable suffering. I often feel like I'm left hanging in limbo especially when she does not respond back to me. To make matters worse, I have Pluto in Scorpio in 5th which bestows obsessive tendencies towards love affairs. Pluto tightly trines Neptune which I'm sure allows the obsessive tendencies to flow quite smoothly. Again, this isn't good either. However, as astrology has taught us that everything evolves round karma, I will have to learn the lesson in this life the hard way.

....but I would say that perhaps these people idealize the person they are with and turn a blind eye to their flaws? I know I have told her many times that she sees things through rose tinted glasses and chooses to avoid reality because she is afraid of being alone

The above description has summed up what I have experienced. In my opinion I wouldn't say this is one of the more favourable aspects relationship wise. Wherever Venus and Neptune are in aspect it generally causes instability in relationships.

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Haha funny you mentioned "stimulating topic." I was thinking to myself yesterday about natal aspects that would indicate that, as I sparked this Cold War on Instagram under the sochiproblems hashtag just from posting a funny comparison photo (and also usually stir up discussions on my Facebook posts as well). I had to delete and report the death threats and draw my curtains in fear of infrared missile homing (and also have a Russian friend translate for me, which was hilarious). But that is a whole other thread to be created!

Now, back to focus...

So do you think the extremity comes from Pluto moreso than Neptune for you? I think saying that Venus and Neptune together cause instability is a generalization because this would seem to be a generational aspect based on your Venus sign, no? My college boyfriend has been married going on 10 years and he has this aspect. I clearly like the aspect and am equally as drawn to those sort of men considering I have a pattern going on here. I have Neptune sextile Saturn (and Pluto, but that is more generational), so I don't really have too many issues with being duped. If anything, I am overly aware of people's flaws. Maybe I am drawn to Neptune people because I have cold Capricorn Venus and Saturn / Neptune. If I don't have someone draw me into romance and such then I am cold as ice.

I've read that Venus / Neptune aspects denotes cheating, but I very much so disagree. From personal experience I think it makes someone extremely loyal and romantic. I think that person is more likely to be deceived and cheated on than be the person doing the deceiving.

Haha funny you mentioned "stimulating topic." I was thinking to myself yesterday about natal aspects that would indicate that, as I sparked this Cold War on Instagram under the sochiproblems hashtag just from posting a funny comparison photo (and also usually stir up discussions on my Facebook posts as well). I had to delete and report the death threats and draw my curtains in fear of infrared missile homing (and also have a Russian friend translate for me, which was hilarious). But that is a whole other thread to be created!

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LOL @infrared missiles homing.

Now, back to focus...

So do you think the extremity comes from Pluto moreso than Neptune for you? I think saying that Venus and Neptune together cause instability is a generalization because this would seem to be a generational aspect based on your Venus sign, no? My college boyfriend has been married going on 10 years and he has this aspect. I clearly like the aspect and am equally as drawn to those sort of men considering I have a pattern going on here. I have Neptune sextile Saturn (and Pluto, but that is more generational), so I don't really have too many issues with being duped. If anything, I am overly aware of people's flaws. Maybe I am drawn to Neptune people because I have cold Capricorn Venus and Saturn / Neptune. If I don't have someone draw me into romance and such then I am cold as ice.

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Well I say that it causes instability based on my own personal experience, in addition to the limited cases where I have seen Venus in aspect to Neptune. I think the extremity comes from Pluto, yes. That rich Plutonian energy is in actually in fact sextiles Neptune (apologies for stating it as a trine aspect in my original post). To a certain extent I'm actually glad it's more of tight sextile rather than a tight trine, because a comfortable trine would perhaps make me more obsessive than the somewhat obsessive tendencies I already project. It's quite possible that in the chart of your college boyfriend, there must be some stronger more dominant aspect which provides a supplement to his commitment. Hence it could explain why he hasn't struggled in a relationship. I think if you had Neptune square Saturn then things would probably have been quite difficult. Restriction/difficulties would arise out of and in the connection with that rose coloured glass you used to aptly describe in your original post. Have your previous partners projected 'cold' behaviour or given you cold attitude in the past?

I've read that Venus / Neptune aspects denotes cheating, but I very much so disagree. From personal experience I think it makes someone extremely loyal and romantic. I think that person is more likely to be deceived and cheated on than be the person doing the deceiving.

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Totally agreed! Yes the native whose's chart bares this aspect is the one who tends to be the victim of a relationship breaking due the committed adultery of their x partner. As they seems to look upon their partner "through rose coloured glass", they become blind and develop an irrational line of thinking. Logic seems to cease in their mind and feelings take over. This characteristic in itself just goes to support how caring a partner they are, perhaps too caring. Maybe it is this very aspect's over caring attitude chokes their x partner's privacy and need of space which causes the break up. Again here I speak from personal experience.

Jeez, I have Venus trine Neptune and you guys are talking scary things there.

Yanel said:

Jeez, I have Venus trine Neptune and you guys are talking scary things there.

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How have you experienced Venus trine Neptune in a relationship capacity? Unfortunately we can't all have easy aspects. I'm sure there must something good you could share with us.

Lol, I wish I knew, I'm 17 and my relationships involve only my teachers and me, negative relationships of course. Sorry guys, I can't help here, but from what I'm reading...it's not exactly the best aspect. Especially because of the 'victim to adultery' part.

The_Saturnian said:

LOL @infrared missiles homing.



Well I say that it causes instability based on my own personal experience, in addition to the limited cases where I have seen Venus in aspect to Neptune. I think the extremity comes from Pluto, yes. That rich Plutonian energy is in actually in fact sextiles Neptune (apologies for stating it as a trine aspect in my original post). To a certain extent I'm actually glad it's more of tight sextile rather than a tight trine, because a comfortable trine would perhaps make me more obsessive than the somewhat obsessive tendencies I already project. It's quite possible that in the chart of your college boyfriend, there must be some stronger more dominant aspect which provides a supplement to his commitment. Hence it could explain why he hasn't struggled in a relationship. I think if you had Neptune square Saturn then things would probably have been quite difficult. Restriction/difficulties would arise out of and in the connection with that rose coloured glass you used to aptly describe in your original post. Have your previous partners projected 'cold' behaviour or given you cold attitude in the past?



Totally agreed! Yes the native whose's chart bares this aspect is the one who tends to be the victim of a relationship breaking due the committed adultery of their x partner. As they seems to look upon their partner "through rose coloured glass", they become blind and develop an irrational line of thinking. Logic seems to cease in their mind and feelings take over. This characteristic in itself just goes to support how caring a partner they are, perhaps too caring. Maybe it is this very aspect's over caring attitude chokes their x partner's privacy and need of space which causes the break up. Again here I speak from personal experience.

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No, my boyfriends have always been the warmer of the two of us in terms of being romantic. Moon-wise, they have had an Aries Moon, Capricorn Moon, Taurus Moon and Aquarius Moon. The Taurus Moon was the most difficult for me to deal with as someone with a Gemini Moon.

You know what aspect I do have? Juno conjunct Neptune, so perhaps I am as equally delusional as a Venus / Neptune person!

I have Venus square Pluto so I can be very obsessive. I find it to be a really difficult aspect to deal with. And then I have a nice Neptune / Pluto sextile.

All of my boyfriends have had Pluto contact to Mars or Venus also.
Current bf: Mars square Pluto
Rebound bf: Mars square Pluto and Venus trine Pluto
College bf: Venus sextile Pluto
Live in bf: Mars trine Pluto

Can you post your chart? I am curious hahaha.

Yanel said:

Lol, I wish I knew, I'm 17 and my relationships involve only my teachers and me, negative relationships of course. Sorry guys, I can't help here, but from what I'm reading...it's not exactly the best aspect. Especially because of the 'victim to adultery' part.

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Understandable. At that age you may not have had that many relationships with partners. Time will tell I guess. Do not fear though, what I may have written or the literature you may have read from a book or an article published online. Astrology never has any right or wrong answers. It is all about studying and scrutinizing trends.

No, my boyfriends have always been the warmer of the two of us in terms of being romantic. Moon-wise, they have had an Aries Moon, Capricorn Moon, Taurus Moon and Aquarius Moon. The Taurus Moon was the most difficult for me to deal with as someone with a Gemini Moon.

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This makes sense, as you said that you have Venus in Capricorn.

You know what aspect I do have? Juno conjunct Neptune, so perhaps I am as equally delusional as a Venus / Neptune person!

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Juno plays an all important role especially for women I understand. She plays an important role in relationships too. Yes I would arrive at the same conclusion. Juno conjunct Neptune could make the person suffer from the same inferiority complex as Venus - Neptune aspects could. I.e. not seeing their partner for what they really are.

I have Venus square Pluto so I can be very obsessive. I find it to be a really difficult aspect to deal with. And then I have a nice Neptune / Pluto sextile.

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I can imagine. You must really struggle to keep the obsessive tendencies under control. Neptune - Pluto sextile could be worse had it been a trine.

All of my boyfriends have had Pluto contact to Mars or Venus also.
Current bf: Mars square Pluto
Rebound bf: Mars square Pluto and Venus trine Pluto
College bf: Venus sextile Pluto
Live in bf: Mars trine Pluto

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Interesting that they have Mars/Venus and Pluto aspects. Could it be a pattern or indication of something? Perhaps. It would seem to me that Pluto's aspects seem to yield powerful effects upon your relationships. I have the same aspects as your rebound x partner. Comes to think of it, I invest a lot of energy into trying to curb my obsessive tendencies. Yet I feel that Venus trine Pluto seems win.

Can you post your chart? I am curious hahaha.

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Sure I've attached it for your perusal.

Understandable. At that age you may not have had that many relationships with partners. Time will tell I guess. Do not fear though, what I may have written or the literature you may have read from a book or an article published online. Astrology never has any right or wrong answers. It is all about studying and scrutinizing trends.

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Yes, I know. I've experienced some of the misunderstandings in astrology. Astrologers don't have the same opinions and I have opinions that are completely opposing what most of the sources say. Intuition and patience are big parts of the studying process. It's not fully explored. In fact, every astrologer or simply a newbuy is a researcher and a discoverer.
Neptune is about illusions, it's the planet of dreamers but it doesn't mean that when aspecting Venus can lead to harmful deceiving. It maybe gives a tendency to have a kind of a love ideal. This is not a bad thing. Another aspects in the chart can show that this desire can be fulfilled, who knows for sure? If I believe in something in this life, it is in soul mates.

Anjelik, interesting subject that you brought up. Well, I have Venus in Virgo square Moon-Neptune in Sagittarius, in the 8th and 12th house respectively. After a few moments of reflection, I will say that the way that I love or experience relationships can sometimes feel like a service (Virgo) or mission (Sagittarius). I have attracted many Pisces-type men (e.g. Sun, Moon, Venus or ASC). There's always a sort of detached neediness that comes from them and I used to think that I could save them (Virgo-Sag). For a while I wondered if I was gay because I did not enjoy myself with men, but could not bring myself to be with a woman; the spark is simply not there.

These days I have dropped out (Virgo I guess) of the relationship scene all together. Despite having Venus in the 8th house, I have had great problems enjoying sex and not because I find it dirty. My issue is that I have a higher ideal (Sagittarius) of what I want sex to be. In my experiences (sexual and non-sexual), I find that people are very simple about sex and orgasms, so they say. Since I cannot take others statements at face value I remain skeptical of this (Virgo). Although I find the idea of marriage a trap (Sagittarius Moon), it will be the only way for me to fully enjoy love and sex.

The_Saturnian said:

Interesting that they have Mars/Venus and Pluto aspects. Could it be a pattern or indication of something? Perhaps. It would seem to me that Pluto's aspects seem to yield powerful effects upon your relationships. I have the same aspects as your rebound x partner. Comes to think of it, I invest a lot of energy into trying to curb my obsessive tendencies. Yet I feel that Venus trine Pluto seems win.



Sure I've attached it for your perusal.

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That's because you were born 10 days before him He had a Leo stellium (Sun, Mars, Mercury) that overlaid my 7th house and my Libra stellium (Mars, Pluto, Saturn) overlaid his 5th house. My Venus (in the 1st) squared his Pluto (in the 5th). We also had Mars (him) opposite Venus (me). It was definitely a very intense and sexually based relationship. He will randomly text me or challenge me in WWF (like last week), but I always decline because I am in a relationship and wouldn't appreciate my boyfriend flirting with someone he used to be involved with. It's interesting that he keeps coming back since we "broke up" in 2012. I am guessing the Pluto Venus synastry is the reason he still obsesses over me.

kailaniatsea said:

Anjelik, interesting subject that you brought up. Well, I have Venus in Virgo square Moon-Neptune in Sagittarius, in the 8th and 12th house respectively. After a few moments of reflection, I will say that the way that I love or experience relationships can sometimes feel like a service (Virgo) or mission (Sagittarius). I have attracted many Pisces-type men (e.g. Sun, Moon, Venus or ASC). There's always a sort of detached neediness that comes from them and I used to think that I could save them (Virgo-Sag). For a while I wondered if I was gay because I did not enjoy myself with men, but could not bring myself to be with a woman; the spark is simply not there.

These days I have dropped out (Virgo I guess) of the relationship scene all together. Despite having Venus in the 8th house, I have had great problems enjoying sex and not because I find it dirty. My issue is that I have a higher ideal (Sagittarius) of what I want sex to be. In my experiences (sexual and non-sexual), I find that people are very simple about sex and orgasms, so they say. Since I cannot take others statements at face value I remain skeptical of this (Virgo). Although I find the idea of marriage a trap (Sagittarius Moon), it will be the only way for me to fully enjoy love and sex.

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Thank you for sharing, that is very interesting. What other Venus aspects do you have? I have Mars in Libra in the 8th and I've had issues with sex. It took me a really long time to learn to enjoy myself and just let go (I have Mars conjunct Saturn). Sex is more linked to Mars than Venus. What is your Mars sign and how is it aspected?

kimbermoon said:

[FONT=Andalus, serif]I too am interested in searching for the essence of these configurations...my own daughter has the opposition, and she definitely continues to confuse and mystify me by her actions and her attitudes. [/FONT]​

[FONT=Andalus, serif]I can say she has been prone to being very secretive, deceptive and seemingly confused in her own mind...she can act like the chameleon to fit into whatever situation she encounters, as long as she wants to...other times she has had disagreements with me, that cause her to be detached from me for long periods of time [separation and detachment]. There have been times when she has decidedly betrayed me, showing lack of respect and disregard even as her mother [but I guess that's not so unusual]. In turn she feels that I am always judging her in terms of her 'parenting', yet she herself is quite judgemental in turn. Personally I think she is self-delusional and highly changeable.; she has also struggled with self-esteem issues I might add, which perhaps causes her to imagine her reality according to her own needs and wants. I would say that typically there are issues of trust and faith involved. [/FONT]​

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What are the signs / houses for your daughter?

anjelik said:

That's because you were born 10 days before him He had a Leo stellium (Sun, Mars, Mercury) that overlaid my 7th house and my Libra stellium (Mars, Pluto, Saturn) overlaid his 5th house. My Venus (in the 1st) squared his Pluto (in the 5th). We also had Mars (him) opposite Venus (me). It was definitely a very intense and sexually based relationship. He will randomly text me or challenge me in WWF (like last week), but I always decline because I am in a relationship and wouldn't appreciate my boyfriend flirting with someone he used to be involved with. It's interesting that he keeps coming back since we "broke up" in 2012. I am guessing the Pluto Venus synastry is the reason he still obsesses over me.

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No wonder! There's so much tension with all those aspects.

The_Saturnian said:

No wonder! There's so much tension with all those aspects.

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Yuuuup and my Venus was in his 8th house. I was pretty obsessed with him at the time. It was this uncontrollable obsession towards each other to the point of it being unhealthy. I can't explain the relationship in words, really. We were this unlikely pairing, but when we were horizontal (or upside down haha) it didn't matter. We both knew we would never end up together.

Your chart is creepily similar to his...hahaha. That did not mean to come off creepy, but it is. Take a look.

The angles of the house are more even, but yes it is very similar and yup that did creep me out for a second. LOL With exception of the Moon, it seems pretty much is quite a similar layout to mine.

The_Saturnian said:

The angles of the house are more even, but yes it is very similar and yup that did creep me out for a second. LOL With exception of the Moon, it seems pretty much is quite a similar layout to mine.

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Almost solar twins!