Scorpio vs. Cancer w/ issues -will it work out?

Horus · Nov 29, 2009

Scorpio vs. Cancer Compatibility Dilemma

Hi All,

I'm a Scorpio man and I just started dating a Cancer lady who has been divorced (from an Aries) for six months. Dreams, visions, and intuitive promptings have made me pursue her, and it was a like lightning had struck when I first met her!

Outwardly it would seem to be a good match per basic sunsign compatibility, (better than w/ the Aquarius I was dating before her) but I am already experiencing communication issues, a couple of heated arguments, and a feeling of oddity w/ her at times. Yet there is this intense attraction, and growing affection between us. It 'clicks' but it doesn't 'flow', or vice-versa.

I've turned to astrology to try to understand the crazy dynamic, and whether there is any real chance of having a successful, committed, long-term relationship with her. Our individual charts and synastry wheel are attached.

I've plugged our data into several sites to get synastry readings and received mixed messages back. Some interpretations list aspects that alternate between "this is wonderful" and "this is terrible". The Venus Files website lists tons of aspects I've never heard of ("tri-septile", "octile', etc.) and sugarcoats negative aspects w/ optimistic suggestions.

I also went to configurationhunter.com and printed a list of aspects (sans asteroids and moons - keeping only Chiron and Juno) and tried to evaluate them w/ Cafe Astrology's numerical system and tally up a "score". The problems with that approach were a) Cafe doesn't give points for everything on the confighunter's list and b) I'm skeptical that the config hunter actually listed all of the aspects that are there.

For example, I have five planets in Scorpio. Shouldn't her Saturn in Leo be squaring all five? Only one or two have been listed in these various auto reports around the Web. Why? Is it the degree separation?

It looks like the strongest things going for us are:

1) my Sun conjuncts her North Node
2) my Sun conjuncts her Uranus -which is her ruling planet
3) her Venus and Sun are in my 7th house (I read that's it better if mine were in her 7th -oh well!)
4) my Pluto is in her 7th house
5) Our Suns are trine (4°)
6) Our Venuses are trine (Venus -Sun trines less than 2°)

7?) I've also read that it's worth something if the Sun conjuncts the partner's descendant, but what about the Moon? Any points for that? Her Gemini Moon seems to conjunct my descendant.

This connection feels karmic to me, and I may be instrumental to her growth, healing, and transformation. The positive Pluto aspects and conjunction w/ her North Node would seem to confirm this, and I am a clinical hypnotherapist...

The chief negative aspects seem to be:

1) her Mars squares my Saturn (really BAD!)
2) my Sun squares her Saturn
3) my Mars squares her Sun
4) my Mars is in her 7th house

5?) Both of our Mars' and Venuses are square to one another too which seems to be a mixed bag of sex and (combative?) tension.

6?) Our Moons are in Opposition and I keep reading mixed things about that too. One astrologer thinks its great, another says we're at odds because of it. I read in one place that a Moon in Gemini can indicate dishonesty and deception...?

Do all of the Martian squares mean I am going to be fighting with this girl most of the time, or will our lovely Sun-Venus trines "smoothe over ruffled feathers"? I have worked through and healed a lot of my own issues in recent years, (and coincidentally the ones reflected in my own natal chart by Saturn opposing all my stuff in Scorpio) but I still get very jealous and this could be the flash-point for conflict w/ this woman. How do I transcend that? Doesn't everyone get jealous when their significant other spends lots of time w/ friends of the opposite sex who are attracted to them? (sigh)

I have no idea how to interpret the Ascendants. If they compare to each other directly, then I guess they are trine. If hers compares to my Sun and the other four planets that I have in Scorpio, then there are some squares. Does that matter? How important is the ascendant in all of this? Isn't that just the mask we wear while the Sun and Moon is who we really are?

Our Mercurys are non-aspected -is this behind communication difficulty? And yet, my Mercury also trines her Sun and Venus. I'm confused. Maybe she's just a wounded crab and it will take awhile for her to come out of her shell and get used to me...

There are other good and bad aspects but I'm unsure how weighty they are...and that's actually the crux of my confusion and query here:

WHAT is ruling this picture??? The positive aspects or the negative? Can I marry this gal?

Any thoughts, insights and feedback would be greatly appreciated.

astrologer50 · Nov 30, 2009

Re: Scorpio vs. Cancer Compatibility Dilemma

Welcome to AW,
Attention new members
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=19968
Starting out with basics—from our Education forum
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12556

The software you used online, in my opinion you need to alter the 'orbs' all to 3' because they are set for natal chart degrees and in synastry the max I use or allow is 3'. Also doing this it will knock out all the minor aspects, like semi sextiles, quintiles etc.

Now your chart is a 'bucket' chart with Saturn as Apex/handle. Plus stellium planets in scorpio http://www.therealastrology.com/HTML/FAQS/AspectPatterns.html#Stellium

When looking at a woman’s chart the type of man she would look for is her sun sign and mars traits, plus 7th house planets and house cusp ruler and where that ruler was deposited.
When looking at a mans chart for the type of woman he would look for is his venus and moon sign and then 7th house planets and house cusp ruler and where that ruler was deposited.

Although synastry is a valuable tool with astrology it cannot 'make things happen' even if you have the best synastry in the world unfortunately..

If you want to research more into synastry try here
http://cafeastrology.com/astrology_of_relationships.html
http://www.cafeastrology.com/synastry/interchartaspects.html
http://www.cafeastrology.com/synastry_house_overlays.html
http://www.astrology-numerology.com/synastry.html
http://www.astrology-numerology.com/synastry-houses.html
http://www.astrology-numerology.com/synastryaspects.html
http://www.cosmitec-astrological-compatibility-advice.com/astrology-marriage.html
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17513
http://www.astrotheme.com/synastry_advice.php

In your chart Neptune conj venus suggesting over idealised, rose tinted glasses and romantic disillusionment. Also venus is retrograde ie: going backwards suggesting you may find it hard to show romance on occasions.

You have calculated your chart using the default on astro.com of placidus and I use Equal House system and am a modern astrologer. Lots of people that come into Astrology get their free charts calculated at www.astro.com and the default ‘house system’ used is Placidus and think that’s just the norm and all that there is……..BUT that is just the tip of the iceberg. You can change the default on astro.com in Extended Chart selection to Equal house and a few more.

Throughout the forums but mainly in natal astrology there are two main branches Placidus (unequal size houses) v Equal House (whereby each house is same size) but lots more……. For more information on these go here.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_(astrology)#Description
http://www.astrolozy.com/article19.asp
http://www.skyviewzone.com/birthinfoforms2/housesexplained.htm

It's only with study and research will you be able to assess where your planets are deposited and in which houses... thus see which 'glove fits'

Now in Equal house all your scorpio planets are in 11th with neptune in 12th and venus conj 12th cusp. Anything within 5' of next house cusp going anti clockwise is considered more effective in the next house. Now having said that venus in 12th and retrograde suggests you would rather have alone, private time with that special someone. But friendship must be ultimately important (11th house matters) and scorpio always always wants deep and meaningful.

Now I'm only going to focus and highlight where they may be problems, ie: playing devils advocat here. Her venus/sun cancer is square your uranus --- this can be challenging. http://cafeastrology.com/synastry/venus_uranus_aspects.html

Now your natal moon is 8' Saggi conj her MC and neptune. So the way she presents herself publicly and sociable fits in with your emotional and intuitive expressions. But conj neptune causes difficulties.

There is a tendency to misunderstand or misread each other's signals, so you will have to spend more time processing hurt feelings or perceived slights. Be careful of addictive behaviors and habits or too stressful environments or activities. This aspect can lean toward avoidance or neglectful behaviors.
http://cafeastrology.com/synastry/moon_neptune_aspects.html

You could have the best synastry in the world, but unless you have good communications, are honest with each other about your needs, wishes and desires and 'both' of you want the same things...........then nothing will happen. It cannot make anyone change, or love you more. Some challenging squares, oppositions in synastry can be healthy, and may require one or both of you to grow in some way. Astrological natal charts cannot explain environmental factors, financial handicaps/ restraints and what position you hold in society, neither can it tell you if you are of ‘Royalty’ or beggar.

I am of the belief that people come in and out of our lives for a reason, either we have to teach them something or we have to learn something from them. There is Always an exchange, good or bad.

Good luck with your journey

Horus · Nov 30, 2009

Re: Scorpio vs. Cancer Compatibility Dilemma

astrologer50 said:
The software you used online, in my opinion you need to alter the 'orbs' all to 3' because they are set for natal chart degrees and in synastry the max I use or allow is 3'. Also doing this it will knock out all the minor aspects, like semi sextiles, quintiles etc.

I don't have (or see?) the option to do this.

Now your chart is a 'bucket' chart with Saturn as Apex/handle. Plus stellium planets in scorpio http://www.therealastrology.com/HTML/FAQS/AspectPatterns.html#Stellium

OK, but what does this mean to the synastry?

When looking at a woman’s chart the type of man she would look for is her sun sign and mars traits, plus 7th house planets and house cusp ruler and where that ruler was deposited.

Her Sun in Cancer, Mars in Leo, no 7th planets, cusp ruler is Leo ruled by the Sun which is in cancer. So she needs a Cancer/Leo. Greaaat. :annoyed:

When looking at a mans chart for the type of woman he would look for is his venus and moon sign and then 7th house planets and house cusp ruler and where that ruler was deposited.

Venus is in Scorp./Moon is in Sagg., no 7th house planets, cusp ruler is Gemini ruled by Mercury which is in Scorp. So I'm looking for a Sagg/Scorp/Gemini?

In your chart Neptune conj venus suggesting over idealised, rose tinted glasses and romantic disillusionment. Also venus is retrograde ie: going backwards suggesting you may find it hard to show romance on occasions.

The latter is false, the former has been true in the past especiually when I was younger. Not looking for (nor do I believe in) fairy tale romance.

You can change the default on astro.com in Extended Chart selection to Equal house and a few more.

Thanks for the tip. Koch looks like a good option too.

Now your natal moon is 8' Saggi conj her MC and neptune. So the way she presents herself publicly and sociable fits in with your emotional and intuitive expressions. But conj neptune causes difficulties.

There is a tendency to misunderstand or misread each other's signals, so you will have to spend more time processing hurt feelings or perceived slights. Be careful of addictive behaviors and habits or too stressful environments or activities. This aspect can lean toward avoidance or neglectful behaviors.
http://cafeastrology.com/synastry/moon_neptune_aspects.html

You have offered the interpretation for the square not the conjunction, which looks good actually.

I am of the belief that people come in and out of our lives for a reason, either we have to teach them something or we have to learn something from them. There is Always an exchange, good or bad.

I believe that completely. There are subconscious and/or karmic causes for our particular setup of challenges, and soulmates. Age or past-life regression will uncover and heal such, and it seems to be reflected astrologically as well according to Steven Forrest and others. Every relationship has value and offers a chance to grow.

I would like a little more harmony and smoother sailing for a change as I'm weary of intense processing w/ partners all of the time. I expect an occasionall tiff but not regular warfare!

I still have no idea what to do w/ this Cancer gal... or whether this is a favorable union or not, astrologically and otherwise.

Good luck with your journey

Thanks for the welcome, links, and your help, astrologer50! :smile:

~H.

astrologer50 · Nov 30, 2009

Re: Scorpio vs. Cancer Compatibility Dilemma

http://www.configurationhunter.com/...ne1=1&pluto1=1&northnode1=1&chiron1=1&juno1=1

under 'aspects and orbs' the values are 8,6,8,8,8 and I would change all these to 3---

astrologer50 · Nov 30, 2009

Now your chart is a 'bucket' chart with Saturn as Apex/handle. Plus stellium planets in scorpio http://www.therealastrology.com/HTML....html#Stellium

OK, but what does this mean to the synastry?

I was simply assessing your natal chart and salient points, Saturn is in opposition to your stellium planets in scorpio. This can show a problem relating to father, authority figures.

Members are not here to give 'professional readings' or answers and you will find all sorts of different levels of astrologers, from beginners to advanced. Plus whilst it may not have been directly answering your synastry question, it's still important to build up a picture of your character :innocent:

Her Sun in Cancer, Mars in Leo, no 7th planets, cusp ruler is Leo ruled by the Sun which is in cancer. So she needs a Cancer/Leo. Greaaat.

Don't just think of these as 'signs' think of these as energies, traits. Cancer is a worrier, shrewd in business and good with money and very family orientated. Leo is bossy well organised likes recognition, extrovert, wants to be centre of attention, lots of pride and quite capable of throwing their toys out of the preverbable pram. So Leo ruling 7th and placed in 5th suggests she wants a partner who shares her love of romance, children, creativity and wants to actively be involved in those areas...... Then we look at how her sun & mars are aspected natally. Sun squ pluto suggests a problem relating to father, can be assertive, dogmatic and determined

Moon conj neptune still stands to me anyway, same as square. Emotionall disillusionment, deception is quite possible, bare minimum is confusion of emotions...

Perhaps you should read this thread entitled: astrology predicts meanings, not events
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17546&page=2
Etiquette and telling people their fate
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17248
10Do’s and Don’ts with astrology by Radu
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17450

Astrology is not about sitting home on the couch eating nachos and waiting for the planets to make good things happen in your life. It is always your responsibility to work towards making your own dreams come true. Horoscopes simply help you to schedule your actions for the best possible outcome
http://www.tomorrowsedge.net/virgo-monthly-astrology-horoscope.html

What Astrology Can and Can Not Do
http://www.ofspirit.com/susanmiller1.htm

kaminari · Dec 3, 2009

Dude, awesome.. you were born a day after me!! Ha, yeah I can relate to some of your issues in relationships. Sounds like she has you all stirred up, but the best thing to do is to let it go & not analyze everything. Just let the relationship happen. If it sours, you can look back at all the aspects, things, etc & see what happened. I think as a Scorpio (like me) you have an intuitive sense about people & you also like to dig deep into them, understand every little detail about them. It's great!! But you also need to step back & trust the Universe, that the Universe brought this person into your life for a reason. Accept it.

Edit: I think having the nodal axis at 0 Pis/0 Vir has a lot to do with your search for details. Following the N. nodal path in Pisces & "letting everything go" is a life lesson.

Horus · Dec 7, 2009

kaminari said:
Dude, awesome.. you were born a day after me!! Ha, yeah I can relate to some of your issues in relationships. Sounds like she has you all stirred up, but the best thing to do is to let it go & not analyze everything. Just let the relationship happen. If it sours, you can look back at all the aspects, things, etc & see what happened. I think as a Scorpio (like me) you have an intuitive sense about people & you also like to dig deep into them, understand every little detail about them. It's great!! But you also need to step back & trust the Universe, that the Universe brought this person into your life for a reason. Accept it.

Edit: I think having the nodal axis at 0 Pis/0 Vir has a lot to do with your search for details. Following the N. nodal path in Pisces & "letting everything go" is a life lesson.

Thankyou my fellow Scorpio -though I am more like a "Scorpitarius" due to my double Sagg.

I agree with you to a certain degree. I'm looking at astrology because first of all I just got into it recently, but most importantly I am not getting straight answers from this gal and need some way of figuring this out. She is... secretive, which is what we Scorpios are supposed to be, though strangely I am not --I lay most of my cards on the table. Perhaps she is just a wounded Cancer, and it will take time for her to emerge from her shell. Or her Gemini Moon makes her deceptive...

I do know that the Universe brought her forward for a reason, and it's almost certainly karmic -I could literally 'feel' it right away. This is also reflected in several places in the chart, and has been confirmed by Tarot (Thoth sytem) when I drew "The Devil" (Karmic bonds, control, power, etc.). Karmic soulmates typically have an issue with guilt and blame for past wrongs. Before this ends I am going apologize to her for whatever harm I may have done her, and forgive her for hers. Consciously, I doubt she'll understand it, but it will go straight into the subconscious mind to hopefully heal/shift the energy, and resolve the karma.

My Neptune squaring her Ascendant concerns her appearance (she looks just like my past life wife from World War II which I saw in a hypnotic regression) and is the Universe's way of luring me into a difficult spiritual/karmic situation that I may have otherwise avoided.

It seems that the Moon Opposition Moon and Neptune Square Mars (I make moves, she evades) are also playing out right now. :sad:

Where's the good stuff?

As for my nodal axis, I'm not so sure its Pisces/Virgo as its right on the cusp and some charts I've run say its Aquarius/Leo....I'll have to read the interpretations in Steven Forest's Yesterday's Sky again to see which fits best.

Horus · Dec 7, 2009

Haizea said:
Then, the rest of aspects are not really appealing, or I can't see anything especially appealing, apart from her North Node Conjunct your Sun, which may take her to see you as possible fate.

According to author/astrologer Lynn Birbeck, my Moon conjunct her Neptune ("Two as One") is a wonderful, powerful aspect. Moon conjunct Midheaven (less than 1°) ("Kindred Spirits) and lots of lovely Sun-Mercury-Venus trines at a tight orb which should be helping us out...

But it is you who says to have visions and all that, and I can't see where that could come from beyond your basic understanding of the compatible energies between you and her.

Well...I have always had visions and such (Moon in the 12th), I have a Scorpio Sun and Neptune, and I'm a hypnotherapist and do regular self-hypnosis and meditation so that's where that comes from, I think....

I just saw that and wanted to share it with you, as it is your chart,.

Thank you kindly :smile:

, I don't know what all the asteroids and such mean and I've discovered that many astrologers can't seem to agree on fundemental meanings of such as Juno and Chiron (Magi Astrology, for instance) so I'm mainly considering the classical planets pre- 1930 right now.

kaminari · Dec 7, 2009

Yeah the nodal conjunctions you share, your node on her IC & her node on your Sun & Scorpio energy, pretty pretty cool. Also having her planets in the 7th & 5th of your chart, must be nice. I imagine she's going to be causing a little confusion, but it's because of her Neptune on the MC but maybe that Moon of yours is shining some light. Remember how Neptune is boundless.

I once dated a girl who had the Moon in Gemini. She was the most honest person I've ever met. She really liked talking about her feelings. I think it's important to accept the person as she is, that all these little pieces make up the whole.

You might also like to look at progression charts. Often when someone new comes into my life, I see what's happening, like their progressed Sun conjunct mine, or my progressed Ascendant conjunct theirs. It's quite funny. The last girl I met, we totally hit it off, never could imagine it in my dreams. Later she didn't want to see me again, so I looked to Astrology. Her Jupiter was conjunct my progressed Descendant, exact. All that joyful energy she was putting into me at first, helping me ease into my new Ascendant (changes signs tomorrow, yeah!) Unfortunately, her Jupiter & my Desc sat right next to her Saturn. He put the brakes on that. Evil. :devil:

Yeah, so check out the progressions as well. They're a lot of fun.

Horus · Dec 8, 2009

kaminari said:
Yeah the nodal conjunctions you share, your node on her IC & her node on your Sun & Scorpio energy, pretty pretty cool. Also having her planets in the 7th & 5th of your chart, must be nice.

Nice for her -if she actually wants me! The house overlays in synastry are one-sided, so her Sun and Venus in my 7th means that I see her as a mate not vice versa. In Placidus houses, my Pluto is in her 7th which makes for sexual magnetism which can lead to a powerplay that shifts her idea of love and relationships.

I once dated a girl who had the Moon in Gemini. She was the most honest person I've ever met. She really liked talking about her feelings. I think it's important to accept the person as she is, that all these little pieces make up the whole.

Well I either accept or reject her, but she is being difficult and on the verge of rejection. I have been nothing but kind and generous to her but she got nasty w/ me on the phone the other night for no good reason and hung up on me. That is the one thing that reeaally presses my button! Disrespect! I haven't seen any evidence that she is capable of apologizing, and this thing could blow apart if I even tell her not to hang up on me ever again --which I must to assert healthy boundaries. So it's with a heavy heart that I am bracing for a swift and imminent ending. It's such a shame because there is so much potential between us. I guess the strength of this karmic link is about to be tested....

As for the Gemini Moon, an astrologer friend of mine told me about her difficulties with a dishonest Gemini Moon person and this astrologer:

http://www.novareinna.com/constellation/geminimoon.html

said essentially the same thing:

"Those with their Moon sign in Gemini are not always honest people, particularly in their dealings with those around them. However, they are usually so proficient at deception, that others rarely realize they have been hoodwinked."

You might also like to look at progression charts. Often when someone new comes into my life, I see what's happening, like their progressed Sun conjunct mine, or my progressed Ascendant conjunct theirs.

Thanks for the tip! I have no idea where or how to do that yet.

astrologer50 · Dec 8, 2009

Thanks for the tip! I have no idea where or how to do that yet.

Your natal chart is like a photograph as unique as your fingerprint, BUT the 10planets in the sky have not stayed where they were in your natal chart, they have all moved. Predictive astrology is mostly maths where those 10planets are now and the mathematical aspects they make to your natal charts ie: 180'=opposition, 90'=square, 60'=sextile and 120'=trine.

So your personality, grows, develops, changes, matures as we get older, this is reflected by your sun sign changing from it's natal position to the next sign along, so does your Asc and MC sign change. In fact from sun to mars espec are important, as the outer planets really don't move much, using a 'day for a year' secondary progressions.

If you want to research more into Secondary progressions try here
http://cafeastrology.com/secondaryprogressions.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Astrological_progression
http://www.aquamoonlight.co.uk/progressions.html
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=67

It's very common for progressed venus onto sun or vice versa to be involved, also the North Node of one person conj second person's sun or moon. Also Vertex is usually involved either natally, by progression or by transit. I use max orb orb 3' between each others planets. To research more on inter-aspects try here. http://www.cafeastrology.com/synastry/interchartaspects.html

We also have a 'Relational Forum' besides lots of others and these are very common questions so perhaps researching a while around there could pay dividends....Here is one of my post's with lots of info http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum...ad.php?t=13745

kaminari · Dec 8, 2009

As a Scorpio brother, born just a day before you I say, trust your instincts & get her, or let her go. Some people can't handle our energy, so I accept that (with blood, sweat & tears) & let them move on. If u want her, take control. If you see this as "a lesson learned" love her all the same if she decided to go. And she'll come back to you, respect your honesty &
wilingness, & connect with you on another level.

A friend of mine stirred me up this summer. We had a lot of cool contacts, but it wasn't time. She's my best friend now. We're kind of connected by Saturn, good or bad. I support her choice & this power has shown her riches she could never see as my lover.

The Scorpion is mysterious & sexual & doesn't want to let go. The eagle flies close to the heavens. But it's only in letting go
that we can do that.

I'm wishing you the best.

astrologer50 · Dec 8, 2009

This definition of Gemini Moon looks to me like a cook-book definition, someone who wants to say something and does not know what to say. The second part of the sentence makes me think so:

What does it mean? What does he want to say with "particularly in their dealings with those around them"? Does it mean that Gemini Moons are honest with those who are not around them?

If Moons are like Suns, a Sagittarius Moon knows immediately what it wants (too immediately to be able to really know, perhaps? ). A Gemini Moon probably needs time to analyze and understand. From what you are saying, she doesn't seem to be trying to fool you, or is she?

ALL mutable moons in my books are capable of being duplicitious and even loving more than one person at the same time. Gemini being air can usually talk it way into and out of things with the slick flirty tongue.....

Horus · Dec 8, 2009

Haizea said:
Yes, in this forum we all here are very loving and perfect, and the ones we like have always all these defects...

Please refrain from projecting such rubbish onto me or putting words in my mouth. I've made no claim of perfection, and written truthfully about what has occurred.

kaminari · Dec 8, 2009

Horus said:
Please refrain from projecting such rubbish onto me or putting words in my mouth. I've made no claim of perfection, and written truthfully about what has occurred.

it's your honest words that make us speak truthfully. Everybody has an opinion here. Respect it. Let your friends defend you so u can fight the battles & win. Losers always talk. Cause words have power & that will always be, but a Scorpio never fights, cause he knows once he opens his mouth, the sword is drawn, it's already over anyway.

Horus · Dec 8, 2009

astrologer50 said:
ALL mutable moons in my books are capable of being duplicitious and even loving more than one person at the same time. Gemini being air can usually talk it way into and out of things with the slick flirty tongue.....

Thanks astrologer50, that puts my jealous Scorpio nature at ease! LOL!

My sense is, that something is hidden, but I don't know what or why so. Is it due to a Gemini Moon, or does her Cancer Sun (which is typically loyal and level) mitigate that, or alternatively if she's emotionally-wounded her Cancer nature is protecting her by being secretive. Shame, guilt, cautiousness and distance protecting vulnerability, frivolous (or even malicious) game-playing --- I'm left guessing. If she is wounded from previous relationships or and/or childhood abuse/trauma (ther's strong hints of this in her words) and operating from Shadow as a result, chances are strong that the more negative overleaves of any given aspect will be predominant. And perhaps this explains why the squares and oppositions in our synastry have reared their ugly heads more so than the myriad of wonderful aspects thus far.

There was something "dark" which I noticed about her at the outset. Astrologically this is reflected by her Pluto squaring her Sun and Venus.

A real threat to this relationship is her Neptune squaring her Ascendant -her fears and wounds (or the dreams compensating for them) preventing a realistic relationship -or of one happening at all.

Horus · Dec 8, 2009

kaminari said:
it's your honest words that make us speak truthfully. Everybody has an opinion here. Respect it.

[Unnecessary comment removed. Moderator.]Let's maintain healthy boundaries and be friendly. :wink:

Horus · Dec 8, 2009

kaminari said:
As a Scorpio brother, born just a day before you I say, trust your instincts & get her, or let her go.

I'm getting mixed messages from my intuition and instincts. Instincts btw are about survival. Not necessarily so w/ intuition.

Some people can't handle our energy, so I accept that (with blood, sweat & tears) & let them move on. If u want her, take control.

That's definitely Scorpionic, isn't it! But that's exactly what activates all of the hard aspects in the synastry which describe ego conflicts on power and control, and also the warning of the Devil in Thoth Tarot.

If you see this as "a lesson learned" love her all the same if she decided to go. And she'll come back to you, respect your honesty &
wilingness, & connect with you on another level.

Well, I am trying to view her as fellow human being suffering with difficult issues (as many of us do), and have compassion for her - first and foremost, not as a romantic "prize" or "conquest". I care about her, but I also have to do what's best for me.

A friend of mine stirred me up this summer. We had a lot of cool contacts, but it wasn't time. She's my best friend now. We're kind of connected by Saturn, good or bad. I support her choice & this power has shown her riches she could never see as my lover.

I just had the same thing with an Aquarius gal. We make far better friends than lovers and a long-term anything w/ her is impossible.

The Scorpion is mysterious & sexual & doesn't want to let go. The eagle flies close to the heavens. But it's only in letting go
that we can do that.

I'm wishing you the best.

Thankyou brother! I wish the same for you, and everyone else here!

I see that you have approximately the same configuration that I do with Saturn in Taurus opposing a large stellium in Scorpio. I wish you healing through the challenges of that, (especially on self-worth) and recommend hypnotherapy. Our challenges are not carved in stone and we can heal and transcend past many of the dark traits of the Scorpion to the evolved Phoenix. Namaste!

Inside Out Orange · Dec 8, 2009

At the most basic level you have a nice trine between your Suns. That sets you up to seeming to have the same types of interest and view on life.

Then you have a Sagitarius Moon, and she a Gemini Moon. Again there's probably a bit of light hearted expression of feelings. Both signs like a bit of freedom and not to feel too committed or held back.

But when you really need each other to empathise, you just don't get each other at the feelings level, yet you're both water sun signs. Her Gemini moon will struggle to understand your Scorpio Sun, your Sag moon will struggle with her Cancer Sun. And again where the water elements need that closeness, the moonsigns want some separation.

Add to that her Mercury is conjunct the Moon in Gemini, so she thinks just like she feels. Quickly and superficially. Something that might impress a Scorpio at first, but ultimately may be a source of great frustration at the lack of depth.

If it's to work, you need to use astrology to understand where the difficulties and differences are; so you can avoid getting frustrated or feeling like you're play games.

astrologer50 · Dec 8, 2009

A real threat to this relationship is her Neptune squaring her Ascendant -her fears and wounds (or the dreams compensating for them) preventing a realistic relationship -or of one happening at all.

I don't see this in her natal. Where I do see some commonalities are Aqu Asc, Saggi MC all want and need lots of freedom and independence within relationships, espec Saggi/moon - in fact some of them can be bit of thrill of the chase me merchants, or catch me if you can.

Now here sun conj venus in cancer = inner cheerfulness and love of live (Ihave this) in the house of Leo and and Leo ruling 7th. this suggests someone quite moody, sulky (as are all the water signs) and someone who acts in big grandure ways and likes to be centre of attention and prone to odd tantrums perhaps
Mars conj 7th house cusp cos it's within 5' of 7th is considered my active in 7th and this is where they want to put energy into matters and quite like/enjoy the lively challenge it brings to. Now Aquarius is a very private sign, along with scorpio but talkative, knows lots of people and firstly needs friendship, mental companionship before physical things....

I don't see any obvious signs of abuse from childhood, albeit her chart ruler uranus and pluto are in 8th house of joint finances/resources and sex..

What I do see as main problem albeit wide orb is your Uranus is square her venus.
Electric attraction characterizes this pairing. However, both will have to deal with an inability to truly count on one another over time. The Uranus person may resent any hint that the Venus person wants more of a commitment from, or structure in, the relationship. Affection may be inconstant, or the two may often be separated from one another at key moments. In order for this relationship to work, both parties need to expect the unexpected. This relationship can be an emotional rollercoaster ride, particularly for the Venus person.
http://cafeastrology.com/synastry/venus_uranus_aspects.html

Your mars conj her pluto - this is where the power plays are going on...... try using our search feature here on AW or google...

Scorpio vs. Cancer w/ issues -will it work out?

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