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Relational Astrology Relationships and the astrological methods of interpreting them are discussed here.

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Unread 02-09-2021, 07:01 AM
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theoddone theoddone is offline
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Need Help Interpreting This

Hi all, I haven't been around this forum for quite a while because I was going through some pesonal stuff.

Synastry is not my strongest point and this actually involves a friend of mine and another woman. She has strong feelings for him, however he kept rejecting her and saying he only saw her as a friend. She accused him of jacking off in public while with another female friend of his and told him that he used women, all while she's been clingy and crying everytime he rejects her. The last comment about him using women struck a nerve with him and drove him into a deep depression and caused suicidal thoughts. The two things this woman accused him of? Neither are true. I've spent the last two weeks trying to help him through the depression and make sure he didn't kill himself. And now all of a sudden, he realizes he's in love with this woman. It strikes me as odd because of how toxic I've seen her act. And he says it's all his fault that she acted that way. He is not responsible for her behavior or actions. Something is just not right because his behavior is way out of character for him and he was honestly happier before she came along and wedged her way into our circle of friends. To top it off, she's married and from a conversation I had with her, what she has with her husband works for them. They're married but separate and she didn't indicate it wasn't going end anytime soon.

I ran the synastry chart between them (I managed to get accurate information from both of them) and noticed he has a 7th house Pluto and she has Scorpio DSC, plus his Sun falls into her 8th house. She has an Aquarius stellium that also falls into his 12th house. I'm seeing a toxic relationship (8th house and 7th house Plutonian themes with both of them) that is making him not see it for what it is (12th house synastry). With her Saturn squaring his Venus, her Moon squaring her Saturn, and his Moon opposing her Saturn, I really think he's going to end up trapped in a never ending toxic cycle if he decides to try a pursue a relationship with her.

It would be nice if someone could double check that for me and offer additional insights because I really care about my friend and I don't want to see him getting hurt in the long run.
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Unread 02-09-2021, 09:26 PM
ElenaJ ElenaJ is offline
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Re: Need Help Interpreting This

You have done quite a bit to help your friend through his down period, but at this point you may be entering too far into his emotional space, and risk overpowering him and blocking his spiritual development. We learn from difficult situations, not from easy ones. He needs to work it out, get hurt possibly, and learn from it.
At the moment he is being personally triggered by some strong transits. Uranus is coming to conjunct his ascendent, and mars has recently been passing over this point heating things up.
And pluto opposes his mars.
His sun/venus on her moon is a strong emotional/love draw, and in the 12th house it corresponds to "hidden" affairs, which reflects her marital status.
Her pluto on his North node is also very powerful and mesmerising, with her Venus squaring them creating a deep love contact that is difficult to escape. This contact is being favoured by the transits in early Aquarius that are happening now, that trine the libra pluto/NN.
These energies may have to work themselves out before he (or she) can detach from them. They are quite strong.
While her virgo descendent is on the cool and analytical side, his descendent in scorpio feeds off these powerful transiting and synastry energies. His Uranus in 7th shows he needs space in relationships, and his sun/venus in Aquarius reinforces this need, so we see here one reason why an impossible, open relationship fits his natal pattern.
You can't do anything to stop the contact, as long as he needs it he will follow it.
His Uranus in 7th and transiting Uranus on his ascendent can end things just as unexpectedly as they begin them.
In addition to her composed virgo descendent, she has a calculating manipulative Capricorn Venus and a cool detached Aquarius moon. Its her flirty fun loving sagittarius sun/mercury that is playful and appeals. But she may prove to be just too detached for his taste after a while. He won't be able to get a hold on her spiritually. And his sensitive cancer mars will be crushed by her Saturn, that squares his emotional fiery moon. All of which will give him little satisfaction after the initial attraction wears off. Of course, this has to be weighed against her unattainability because of her marriage. He will be on an emotional treadmill running ever faster but never quite getting there with her.
You don't mention whether she corresponds to his feelings, but given her cool nature she may find it fun to flirt but not be too involved.
In the meantime, you can only stand by and wait to see if he will need some spiritual balm when it blows over, assuming it will blow over.
You must be a bystander, and not try to manipulate the situation.
Do you have feelings for him other than friendship? You don't really go into this very much. If you do, it won't be easy for you to remain on the sidelines. In fact, in the case that you yourself want a relationship with him, you are in for some suffering.
If on the other hand, you are a caring friend, then you have to draw on all your mental patience and hold your tongue and wait it out, watching from the sidelines.
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Unread 02-09-2021, 09:42 PM
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theoddone theoddone is offline
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Re: Need Help Interpreting This

You need to switch the planetary placements for them. She's red and he's blue. I'll apply what you said by switching it in my mind.

And I've already decided to watch from the sidelines but not get directly involved. I suspect there are lessons that need to be learned and if it's karmic, then my hands are tied and it needs to be played out. It'll be disastarious if I try to interfere with it. I did tell him I needed to remove myself from the equation because I think there's some jealousy on her end and she's proven herself to be a toxic individual and I don't need that in my life.

Thanks anyway.
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